I opened my eyes to darkness and all the jumbled thoughts in my head seemed to ease up a little. Almost as if they were afraid of what my waking mind might do to them. I tried to hold on to some of the images in my brain to try to make sense of them as they tumbled over each other.
They seemed to be memories. I could make out the faces of my friends, Oliana and Kaliya, as we shared some laughs in the cafeteria at the Academy. Yes. That made sense. It wasn’t just a flash of jumbled up stuff.
There were lots of other faces, too. My mother and father... My father’s face was clear… he was the Zheav… our leader… I could see my brothers, Axiak and Jadidi, running and diving off the rocks and into the ocean at The Dive... There was a sea of faces I recognized as my classmates at the Academy… I frowned up at the ceiling in the darkness. Something was definitely wrong with this picture. I didn’t have any brothers. Or parents... I was a clone... What the...?
A flash of something... Oliana’s smiling face... “Travelling to the edge of the Explored Universe,” she said, “studying new races and exotic planets — and being paid for it — how could a New Graduate with an adventurous spirit refuse?”
My friend faded away and was replaced by the image of an old woman with wrinkles so deep that they looked painful. Tasha, the Old One. Tasha took one look at me and scoffed. “So I ask for a pupil I can help to hone their Mind Skills, and this is what they send me? Ha!”
Tasha floated away into the depths of the ocean and then there was the beautiful sight of so many colourful fish, swimming in and out of the coral and the rocky outcrops on the ocean floor. Once the fish dissolved away, there was a large computer screen on a wall in a small classroom. The room was filled with students sitting with their heads bent as they worked on their exam papers.
Then my mother stood before me. “You are the daughter of the Zheav. You know there are certain things expected of you. You cannot abandon your duties and run off to play with Jarleth and your brothers.”
“But Mama, we weren’t gone long...” Before I could finish pleading with my mother, that image faded to nothing. It left me confused. How could she be my mother? I didn’t have a mother...
Panic crept into my chest and I squeezed my eyes shut. What was happening? Who were these people? I knew them all, but I didn’t know them. My head was filled with memories of two distinctly separate worlds and two different lives; the civilised and technologically advanced Earth and the wild jungle planet... Sovoli, my memory supplied. None of it made sense. My heartbeat picked up so fast it felt like it was fluttering inside my ribcage. I needed to calm down. I needed to think rationally. These memories could not all be mine…
More images flooded in… swimming under the sea… studying computer programming at the Academy… Jarleth, a warrior of the Waikari people and my Betrothed… running and laughing on the beach… Oliana sitting in front of her computer monitor studying for her classes...
My name was Sifayah… NO, I was Zhenna! It was too confusing. Too much... I put both hands up to my head and squeezed, hoping it would help and knowing that it wouldn’t.
I could see my father’s face, but I knew I was a clone and didn’t have a father in the proper sense of the word. I was made in a lab and genetically altered so I didn’t look identical to the original human I’d been cloned from. We all were. But the image of him was there in my mind all the same, looking down on me with a proud expression… then Kaliya was there — the close friend I affectionately called “Mum”… then my father again… Impossible! I was a clone! Clones do not have parents!
I didn’t know who I was… I felt lost. They seemed like my memories — like I’d actually lived them — all of them — but the chances of that were as slim as me flying through the air like a Hovercar.
How could this happen? Something must have happened to me before I woke up here... wherever here was. There must be something I was forgetting...
My train of thought was derailed by the memories of what had happened in the jungle. We’d boarded the shuttle from the main ship, the Acronis, and headed to the surface of the planet. Then there was the problem with the shuttle… landing to do repairs... the beautiful sights of the amazing plant life and the colourful birds... a prehistoric-looking flying thing swooping into the clearing and nearly scaring us half to death... the stupid argument with Kami… the attack... laser fire and screams echoing through the trees...
I pulled my thoughts away from those terrifying moments and opened my eyes to the darkness again. I realized I was trembling all over and took some deep breaths to try to calm myself, heart pounding again.
I could make out a ceiling above me with a small light fitting to my right. I also sensed that I was lying on a bed. Hearing the soft hum of a Bio-scan as it passed down the length of my body was very reassuring as it confirmed that I must be in a Medical Facility. I closed my eyes briefly and relaxed a little. The knowledge that I was back in civilised hands was very comforting. Jannali must have sent out a team to rescue us from the Varekai. At least, I thought we’d been attacked by the Varekai. Who else would do such a thing?
Wait — did that mean those memories were real? Was there a place called Jannali? Station Jannali... I couldn’t be sure.
Were we really attacked in the jungle by pirates? Was that the reason I was in a Medical Facility? I had so many questions. Like why would they be out here, in the middle of nowhere-in-particular, waiting to ambush a shuttle full of scientists, botanists, a linguist and a computer programmer? What would they gain from that? We’d had nothing of any real value on board.
My heart rate wasn’t slowing down. I felt like I might be on the verge of a panic attack and tried to slow my breathing down. Maybe that would slow my heart down a bit, too. Breathe in... then out... in... out...
I needed to think rationally. Needed to sort out this mess. Those other memories of the ocean and the primitive Waikari tribe didn’t tie in with anything like this; Bio-scanners, electricity and Medical Facilities. There was nothing like that in the ocean or cove where I lived — or where whoever it was lived. Maybe those memories were only dreams… or something...
Hmmm... There was something — something I remembered in the back of my mind. Memories… There was a company I’d heard about that could implant memories into your mind so you could have the experiences of going to a new country or new planet, without leaving home. It was like going on a holiday, without really going anywhere. It was a bizarre concept, but it could be that I’d paid to have one of those ‘holidays’ implanted and had forgotten the part where I’d gone in to the company and had the procedure done.
Maybe that was where I was. Maybe that was why I was in a bed with a busy Bio-scan checking my vital signs. If so, I was going to tell them there was something wrong. The memories were all over the place. A jumbled mess. Not pleasant at all. And it didn’t seem like a holiday. Memories of someone’s life. It made for a pretty dull holiday. And it didn’t make any sense.
I want a refund.
But I didn’t remember paying any credits to anyone or visiting a Memory Centre. What have they done to my brain?
I stared up at the ceiling again. Once my eyes had adjusted to the darkness, the room seemed to brighten and I could see quite well. Or did the lights brighten a little as I watched?
My mind wandered. Would I pay credits for a holiday like that? Was my life that boring and empty? Once I thought about it, I realized my life was pretty sterile and ordered. My whole life revolved around my education and the betterment of the human race. Sure I had my two best friends, but there was something missing in my life… Wait a minute. I’d already had this conversation in my head… right before we were attacked.
That was weird.
Then my mind kept on the same track and I kind of couldn’t stop myself.
I’d read about how the other people lived and it seemed to be so much better than the empty life I’d had growing up.
What had gone wrong with society? Why had humans decided to live like this - cloning themselves and living such regimented lives? I was raised this way and taught not to question it, but I couldn’t help it. I felt it was wrong. Unnatural. The memories that were now in my head proved that family relationships were vital to the human spirit.
So maybe I had paid for some memories to be implanted in my mind as a way to escape.
I lifted my head and looked around. I was in a small white room, with discreet light fittings on the walls and a full-length mirror on the far wall. It looked like I was in a Medical Facility, with everything all white and sterile-looking. The lights didn’t look like they were turned on, but I could see everything around me clearly now. To my right there was a small plain bedside table with nothing on it — no hint of any sort of decoration or even a clock. There was a door on my left that was barely visible as it blended so well with the wall itself. I slowly raised myself to a sitting position and sat staring at it for a moment, wondering where I was and what was on the other side.
Suddenly the lights in the room came on at full brightness and the door slid open, making me jump. A man appeared in the doorway and strode into the room as my heart did a weird dance inside my chest. He was a tall, slim-built man with hair the colour of sand and eyes that were a bright, almost sky blue. I guessed he was in his early forties. He wasn’t what I would have called attractive, but he wasn’t unpleasant to look at either.
His facial expression was cold steel, but once he turned his eyes to me, it quickly moulded itself into a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.
I immediately went on alert. I’d seen that look before. I clearly remembered seeing it on the face of one of my professors at the Academy one day after I’d walked in on him blasting one of my classmates for no real reason. The fake face he turned to me as he tried to pretend everything was fine. He’d even patted Jus on the shoulder for added effect.
I looked at the man in front of me now. Not a good first impression, I thought, and tried not to cringe. Was this man as fake as my old professor?
He greeted me with the same weird smile, “Good afternoon, Miss Rhodarma, how are you feeling?”
Rhodarma… that name was familiar… Yes, I was Zhenna Rhodarma. My heart rate picked up. Maybe I would get some answers now about everything.
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Author's Note: It’s fun to comment with emojis to tell me what you think of the story so far.
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