A thing I do is do a trick that I want to call "The Freak" So what i do is make everyone that I know that doesn't see me as anything above them. Let me explain, Firstly I make myself seem normal but you know how those people are. They envy you for no reason at all. But I don't see a reason why you should envy a person from first sight. I find that childish and dumb. Because how childish to judge a person that you don't even know. You've never even had a conversation with them. Secondly, There will be an essay on the first month of school explaining yourself. What i did is name all the simple stuff i do. Playing the game etc. Stuff that you see a normal teenager do. I might hear that person or people that's talking about me. But I tend to ignore them because they are ignorant and you can never win against them. It's just like social media you just can't win if you don't agree you're a bad person but if you do you're getting props for it. Which I find that messed up because how bad do you have to be about it? Why did you become so soft all a sudden? You know, it's important to have a life outside of any potential offense. When you offend someone, you risk facing a lawsuit, a raid, or even worse, a hit on you. I find that extreme and unnecessary. What I do instead is listen to people talk. In a quiet room, with only the AC unit for sound, it's a good way to pass the time. I appreciate the one person who claps for you because they understand what you're going through, whether from personal experience or empathy. I find such people loyal and valuable. If you treat me with respect, I will reciprocate that respect until the very end.
I wish I could feel the same energy that my enemies have against me. If I could, I'd convert it into a neutral feeling. After all, what's the point of holding hatred for someone you've never met or talked to? Even though it can be painful, I observe and keep moving forward. One thing I've learned is to persist—keep going until you reach the end. Challenges will come, but push through them because you are yourself. What can they do to you? Threaten to kill you? That's pathetic and pitiable. It's foolish to want to harm someone over something petty.
This thought came to me while writing. I say this in every story I write: I love writing, and I'm not afraid to express that. If you think it sucks, so be it—I'm not concerned. You've read this far, so you might as well read it to the end. Since this is my diary series, I plan to create a playlist on Spotify. If you're into music, you might enjoy it when it's ready. Also, if you're offended, know that I'm a music enthusiast too.
I want to add that I'm not using AI to help with my grammar in this story—it's raw and unedited, with Google Docs providing some autocorrection. If I ever publish one of my stories, I will, even if it's not my dream. I just enjoy writing. Becoming a writer is amazing, but it would be even more fulfilling to create movies like those I admire. I also want to try making a lo-fi song someday. I might give up if it doesn't work out, but at least I'll have tried.
At one point, I wanted to learn guitar but couldn't find a teacher in person. I had to settle for online options, which weren't ideal. I enjoy trying new things and seeing new experiences. It's like the saying, "monkey see, monkey do," and I'm the monkey doing. I want to be successful, not necessarily through college but in other ways. I want recognition, not just for my soul's success but for my efforts. If I look back and see that I'm as good as staying where I am now or giving up, I understand, but I still strive to move forward.
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