'Audrey's thoughts'
'Ryan's thoughts'
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Audrey's POV:
'Am I dreaming?' I asked myself as I looked into the mirror. 'My head is too big.'
I splashed my face with water, 'nope, still big.'
I can officially say I have gone crazy. Nothing feels real to me. Or maybe I'm dead? Who knows?
All I can say is that I don't feel right. Everyday has been growing weirder and weirder since the last panic attack.
I still go to classes, though, despite Irene's protests. I need to reconnect with the real world, I really need it.
My parents are gonna visit me later, Augustus is gonna be there, I somehow felt at peace. Irene is constantly worried about me, let's just hope she doesn't get white hair soon. Stephanie and Tasneem are more interested than concerned, which I can understand. A person actually seeing dead people, it's terrifyingly amazing.
I was in the courtyard when Walter called out, "hey Audrey!" He was smiling ever-so-brightly and that made me smile too. I could feel Irene tensing up beside me, and I knew why. There have been rumors about me being crazy, which is true when I think about it, but Walter knowing them... is not... good. Just like how Tasneem said, I have become the topic of discussion.
"Wanna a candy?" He handed me a lollipop. "Thanks" I said as I took it from him and began unwrapping it. He gave me a lollipop, how nice of him.
Irene was studying me carefully. "D'you want one too?" He asked Irene, chuckling. "Huh? Oh, no. I was just... wondering what flavor it is." She answered, her eyes still lingering on me.
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Irene's POV:
Okay, Audrey is normal right now. Sucking at her lollipop, not freaking out, seems to be a bit happy too.
"It's Friday tomorrow," Walter began, "so I was wondering..." he glanced at Audrey and seeing her eager eyes he completed his sentence, "if you want to hang out some time?"
Now? Of all the times you could've asked, now? When Audrey is mentally ill?
Bad timing, Walnut. Bad timing.
I couldn't let her go out with him alone, what if she has an episode over there? He'd stay away from her at all times, then. "I'm coming too!" I blurted out.
Shoot! Shoot! Shoot!
I ruined it. I ruined the budding relationship. I ruined the free romance series I'd get to watch live. I must've embarrassed Audrey now.
Both of them stared at me. I smiled at them nervously. "Umm... ok." He said uneasily. He's too nice to say no to me or make an excuse to stop me from coming.
"But are you coming?" He looked back at her, smiling at her. "Sure, why not?" She smiled back.
"Hey!" One of his jackass friends ran towards us. Then he put his elbow on Walter's shoulder and asked, "whatchya guys doin'?"
"Oh, we were just talking about hanging out tomorrow, wanna tag along?" Walter asked casually. His friend eyed me and smirked, "I'd love to." His gaze jumped to Audrey, who was staring daggers at him. He straightened himself, put his hands in his pockets and looked down at the grass. "If looks could kill..." I heard him say under his breath.
I looked over to Walter and found him smiling proudly at Audrey. After all, it is he who taught her that look. It was in high school, when he overheard Audrey talking about how she wanted to learn boxing for fun, he came and offered to teach her, which she gladly accepted.
And that's how he moulded this side of Audrey, the fierce and fatal side.
"So where will we be going?" She broke the choking silence, moving her lollipop to her cheek.
"At my sister's place!" Walter replied excitedly. "What's there at your sister's place?" I asked, confused.
What could possibly be there at his sister's place? Game boards? Netflix?
"Oh! My sister runs a cafe, she works as a coffee cup reader there." He chuckled to himself. "Fortune telling!!" His friend rubbed his hands together, "nice!"
"When should we be ready then?" I asked Walter. "Evening, maybe." He shrugged. "Ok!" His friend said excitedly.
"See you then!" Walter waved at Audrey as his friend dragged him away. She giggled and smiled.
Ah! It's good to see her smile again. "Ay ay ay Audrey!!" I shoved her teasingly. "He actually asked you out. A dream come true, ey?" She smiled shyly. Her cheeks became red with the smiling and the lollipop that stretched it. Then she covered her face with her hands, "I can't believe it!"
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Audrey's POV:
This is definitely a dream. There's absolutely no way he could've asked me to hang out with him out of the blue. But I still feel that wonderful tingly feeling all around my spine. My face and neck were itchy because of my own heat. Ahhh, how can a dream make me feel like this.
After classes, Irene and I walked back home. Nowadays, the kid does not pester me. Maybe because he knows I'm not that well? Would he be that caring for me? Or is it that he's busy doing something else? Nobody knows.
Irene unlocked and opened the door. We could hear people talking from the sitting room. When I went there, I saw my parents, Augustus and Tasneem sitting there with tea and biscuits on the coffee table. 'Tasneem is the only person who'd bring tea for guests.'
"Audrey! Where have you been?" My mother pulled me to a hug. I could feel her warmth spread all over me, so it's not a dream after all. She is real. This is real.
Tears began filling my eyes. It has been so long since I hugged my mother like this. I could not let her go. I held onto her tightly. Fresh tears rolled down my cheeks. 'My back is itchy, oh God.'
She pulled away and scanned me from head to toe. "You've grown taller!" She smiled. "You're just feeling it, mom. I'm pretty sure she's of the same height and weight as she was when she left." Augustus said amused. I have always been the same height for him. No matter how tall I grow, I will always have crane my neck up at him.
My dad came up to me and planted a kiss on my forehead. He knew I wasn't good with body heat, be it other's or my own. He then smiled at me proudly. "Ah! My second daughter!" My mother threw her arms around Irene who giggled happily. My mother then pulled away and scanned her, "My! My! You two have grown to be big women now!" She smiled at us.
"I remember when you both were skinny kids. Continuously giggling at nothing at all. Then you two grew up to be restless teenagers, remember the time when you both went skydiving and pretended to be 24 and 22? Ha ha ha! I was so worried about you guys!"
We all laughed. Truly, it was the best time of our lives.
I excused myself to go and wash up.
When I came back, Stephanie was there and everybody was sitting with solemn faces. Confused, I sat beside my mother, who stroked my hair and looked at me with heartbroken eyes, "we will always be there for you, Audrey. No matter what comes to harm you." I understood what they were talking about and leaned onto my mother's shoulder.
I remembered all the ghosts that I have encountered, I closed my eyes tightly, even thinking about them is scary. And then I remembered about Ryan, the way he stared at me, his coldness, his red eyes at night, the hole in his abdomen, his teasing, his stupidity, his questions, everything. He seemed so unreal to me, but real at the same time. Whenever he was there, I used to think about whether he was a product of my imagination or not.
But is he just a lonely, lost soul? Or is he secretly like the others, only wanting to possess me and give back to the world what it gave him?
I sighed. 'I want to see him...' but seeing him would trigger a panic attack.
I can't stop myself from that, but I can't stop myself from wanting to see him either.
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