Holding her head, hands pulsing with stabbing pain, Hina focused on steadying her staggered breathing and tramping down the anxiety that was rising in her chest. Ignoring the sharpness in her fingers and palms, she pressed them into her temple harder, trying to tell herself everything was ok.
"Just breathe." Tsuya, one of the nurses on staff that Hina had become closer with during her stay in the hospital, said calmly. She crouched in front of the redheaded hero, keeping her company through the panic attack. "In...and out. Good, keep going."
Hina nodded distractedly, eyes closed and focused on her task. She sat in a chair in the psyche ward's recreation room. It was quickly turning into one of her favorite spots, as sitting in her hospital room was gloomy and felt encroaching. The space had lots of room to walk or sit, and the large windows let in plenty of light that she often felt lifted her sprits a bit.
Of course, a nice environment didn't always prevent her dark thoughts from creeping back in. The book she'd been reading forgotten on the ground by the chair, she rocked back and forth slowly as Tsuya helped her through the episode.
"I'm right here, not going anywhere." The nurse continued in a quiet voice. "If we need to, we can call Shouta to come and-"
"No." Hina said quickly, aware enough to reject the idea. "I'm ok...I'll be ok..."
"That's fine. We'll get you through this. It will pass soon." Tsuya agreed with a calming smile. "Just a few more minutes."
True to her word, the nurse stayed by Hina's side until the worst of the episode passed, and she finally settled her hands back on the arm rests of the chair. The spike in anxiety began to recede, and Tsuya murmured until the hero's breathing fell back into a normal cadence. The black-haired nurse finally stood.
"Would you like me to get some music for you to help you stay relaxed?" She asked, but Hina shook her head.
"No, I'm...alright now...Thank you for staying with me."
"No problem, just let us know if you need anything. You have another hour or so of free time before you meet with Dr. Fukuma." She mentioned, flashing her caring a smile before leaving the room. The redhead watched until she disappeared from view, before sighing and looking down at her still-bandaged hands.
The mid-day sun was bright and kept her warm, but she still couldn't shake the shiver of discomfort that the panic attacks left her with. Four days since waking up. And four days since the last restful sleep she'd managed to get. The repetitive nightmares and frequent panic attacks made it feel something closer to weeks.
She looked at the floor, then reached down to where her book had fallen. Her hand shook as it neared, and she gently flexed her fingers in order to grab it by one of the pages. It sent flaring signals up into her arms, but she only winced and continued to bring the item back into her lap.
The constant echoes of pain in her hands had yet to noticeably lessen, and she was worried that they would permanently remain scarred with the phantom slices of her mind's fragments. But day by day, she was learning to deal with the pain and anticipate how to best distract herself from it while gaining a very limited use of her hands.
The corner of the paperback had bent where it landed on the floor, and she debated trying to find her place in the pages again. It was probably best to abandon the story now. The detailed descriptions of one of the characters' nightmares had reminded her too closely of her own harrowing demons, and she had been unable to stop thinking about them once it had come to mind.
With a sigh, she placed the book on the side table and decided not to continue reading and risk another episode. she'd have to tell the nurses that they needed to remove the book from the ward, in case it happened to someone else.
The whole thing had left her very tired, but she perked up when the door to the rec room opened again, and Tsuya poked her head in. An hour had definitely not passed, Hina thought to herself.
"Hey, you have a few visitors." She said, then frowned with worry. "We can ask them to come at a later time, since you're still coming down from an episode."
Visitors? She hadn't been expecting anyone, and it wasn't Shouta's usual time to come around. "Do you know who it is?" She asked.
"All Might, and another gentleman. He looks like an detective. A little young, though." Tsuya reported dutifully.
Hina was tired, but she had a feeling the reason for their visit would be important. Anything having to do with law enforcement was something she'd be interested in. "I'd like to see them."
"Alright, wait here." She said, then disappeared again, the door closing shut behind her.
The former number one hero and Tsukauchi entered cautiously, as if one wrong step would put her over the edge. Hina had gotten used to people acting that way around her in the past few days, but it still irritated her to a small degree. She couldn't hold back the eye roll.
"No need to tip-toe. Come and sit." She said, gesturing to a few chairs on the opposite side of the room. "I'm not going to burst into tears because you scuff your shoe on the linoleum."
"Sorry..." Tsukauchi said abashedly, grabbing one of the chairs and setting it to face her a few feet away. "They said you just had a panic attack, and we didn't want to unintentionally cause another."
"I get it, but I'm ok now."
All Might grabbed a second chair and sat beside his compatriot. "How are you, Hina?" He asked softly, and she shrugged.
"As well as I can be...given the circumstances." Was her reply, not bothering to hide how tired she was. "I just want this to be over with so I can go back to work, truthfully..."
"You're looking well." Tsukauchi added with a smile. "It is good to see you awake. But don't feel the need to rush out of here right away. Healing takes time."
"So everyone says." She muttered, then shook her head at the pitying look they both shot her way. "Sorry...they've suggested I speak my mind in the moment, so I don't bottle things up and make things worse. But don't take anything personally. I'm just a little drained from my anxiety."
The pity finally disappeared, and Toshinori cleared his throat. "Checking on your well-being was one part of our visit, but we also have a few questions. We wanted to wait until your condition stabilized before coming to see you. If now would be a good time to ask?"
Her assumption had been right. "Go ahead. What did you need to know?"
Tsukauchi leaned forward, his voice lowering. "Before that, I wanted to let you know that the Commissioner and myself have kept your kidnapping and condition under wraps. We know UA's reputation at the moment is turbulent at best. No need to cause another stir and risk damaging it further."
The thought hadn't even crossed Hina's mind until now, but Tsukauchi's admission brought a small feeling of relief, that Daichi's meddling wouldn't cause her workplace further grief. He had nothing to do with the students, though she could see how the general public may have seen it that way.
"That is relieving to hear."
"That being said," the young detective continued, "your brother has been apprehended and locked away in Tartarus. Rather than return him to the mainland prison, his quirk strength was deemed too powerful and his sentence was transferred. His accomplice, however, was returned to his cell in Musutafu Maximum Security."
Hina had learned as much from Shouta after her initial awakening, but she nodded anyway, glad of the confirmation.
"The medical team evaluated him upon admittance. Because of his volatility, they have opted to authorize a quirk-suppression chip. It's an experimental method of compliance, but so far the results seem to be promising. He is still also on a medication to reduce the effectiveness and strength of his telepathy as a back-up measure."
"Has he been...violent?" Hina wondered, and he shook his head.
"Not physically. He is expectedly aggressive, from what I have been told, but for the most part cooperative." He went on. "However he won't say anything about his motives, why he went after you or the other heroes in the first place. I was hoping you may be able to shed some light on that."
"You can also decline to answer." Toshinori added in a rush. "If something's uncomfortable for you, we can come back to it another time."
It was only a matter of time before the police came to speak with her about everything. Luckily, this was something that Hina wasn't afraid of bringing up. "The other heroes were only his attempt at finding me after he escaped from prison." She said, watching Tsukauchi tap a little button on the recorder he was holding. "He tried searching their minds for my location, but none of them knew who I was, so in the end, it did nothing to help him. They were collateral damage, I guess."
"Why was he so intent on finding you?" Toshinori asked.
"It goes back to my grandfather." Hina shrugged awkwardly. "He was a prominent villain in America, where my family is originally from. He'd somehow acquired a ring that would amplify his telepathic abilities. When my father defeated him, he took the ring. Neither he nor the agency he worked for could figure out a way to destroy it, but he also didn't want it falling into the wrong hands."
"From what you describe, that's illegal equipment."
Hina nodded. "It is."
"Why not turn it in to the American Government?" Toshinori's head cocked in confusion, but she sighed.
"I'm not sure. He never told me." She blinked a few times, hoping to get rid of some of the heaviness in her lids. "All I know is that he had it smuggled into Japan with him when they moved here. And from what I know of this country, they are even less forgiving than America when it comes to illegal equipment. I only found out about it when I inherited it through their will."
"That's what Daichi was searching for?" Tsukauchi clarified.
"Yes."
"Do you still have it?"
Hina tossed her head side to side, suppressing the urge to yawn. "Yes and no. He had it stored away in a lockbox. Part of my inheritance was the address to where it was hidden. He left me a note, that I should keep it's existence secret from everyone to protect us from being sent back to America. He told me I should never use it, and to destroy it if possible. Though in the event that I couldn't, to pass it to someone who I would entrust my life to."
"Where is the ring now?"
"In a very small storage house In Esuha City."
"All the way on the other side of the country?" Toshinori asked, and she nodded.
"My father wanted it as far away from us as possible. He was afraid that the promise of a stronger quirk would give way to a villain's path." She looked away. "I guess it still did, even after everything he did to prevent that from happening."
After a moment, she looked back up at Tsukauchi. "It's stored in a box under the name John T. Doe. The key for it is in another lock box under the name Jane M. Doe."
"T and M? Do they stand for something?" Toshinori questioned, and Hina gave a tiny smile.
"Their names. Takeshi and Marie Hitagawa."
Both men nodded in understanding, and they gave a moment before continuing, as it was apparent that Hina was growing exhausted by the minute. Her eyes drooped sluggishly, and her attention was beginning to wane.
"The ring will be confiscated and stored in an appropriately secure location, out of the reach of someone who may use it maliciously." The detective finally said. "And you are correct. Japan is very stringent on the possession of illegal equipment. Admitting it would probably garner you a severe fine or jail time for having it in any capacity."
"I understand." She said with a resignation in her tone. There wasn't any point in denying it, or pleading for mercy. She honestly didn't have enough energy to muster up an attempt.
"However, I may be able to help out with that. I don't see a need to report who was in possession of the ring, seeing as Daichi was apprehended before ever getting his hands on it, and you were the reason for his capture."
Hina frowned, about to disagree, but he forged on before she could retort.
"You may be brought in for questioning about it later, but I'm sure the Commissioner will agree with my course of action." He concluded, and Toshinori looked happy with the outcome.
Still not happy that credit was being given to her where it wasn't due, she remained silent, too tired to argue about it. Instead, she asked what had been on her mind since they walked in. It caused an uncomfortable stir in her chest, but she'd push through it all the same.
"This may be a strange question, but...is there any possibility of being able to visit him?"
Tsukauchi and Toshinori both looked at her with a stunned silence, as if she'd grown a second head. It made her uncomfortable, but she really wanted to know.
"Would that really be a good idea?" The blonde man questioned, shaking his head in confusion. "After all that he did to you...why would you want to see him?"
Their disbelief made the sensation in the pit of her stomach worse, and she shifted in place. She looked down at her hands again, still feeling the stinging as they lay against her thighs. "I couldn't say exactly why, but...I just feel like I need to."
"You're still recovering." He pointed out.
"I don't mean right now. Or even in a week or month. But eventually." She looked back up at the men with a clarity her gaze had been lacking. "One day, when I'm not in danger of breaking down at the slightest trigger."
Tsukauchi gave an incredulous huff. "Well...I'd have to see what strings I could pull. He's being kept in the most secure part of Tartarus until they can gauge his quirk's strength properly, but perhaps they would allow a visitation. I won't make you a promise, but I'll see what I can do."
"Thank you." She said, the discomfort still rising in her stomach. She didn't know what from, but it wouldn't go away. Her inner feelings must have shown through on her face, because Toshinori and Tsukauchi both stood the next moment.
"We've taken up enough of your time. I am sorry to have had to bring it all up again during your recovery. Thank you for your cooperation." With a grateful bow from each of them, they left her alone again in the rec room.
"How's the pain? Is it still at a 10?" Tsuya asked, gently unwrapping the bandages that covered her arms. Failing to hold back the tears, Hina nodded.
"Yeah...I don't know why..."
Her palms had been unusually painful after her appointment with Dr. Fukuma. The constant sting had amplified into a scathing, cutting, deep pain that Hina was unable to ignore. It had sent her to her knees when it first began. That had been a bit embarrassing, collapsing in the hallway and keening through the sensations.
"Just breathe through it." The black-haired nurse said quietly, continuing to take off the bandage with mind to how it would be painful to Hina. She was remarkably good at it, considering how much the limb was shaking and trembling.
"I've been breathing the whole time I've been here..." Was her harsh reply, but then she shook her head after a wave of guilt hit. The uncomfortable wetness of tears stuck to her cheeks. "Sorry, I know you're just trying to help..."
Tsuya gave her a wry smile. "No need. We'd have a bigger problem if you stopped breathing."
"I guess..."
She fell silent after that, watching her nurse change them out with fresh cloth. It hurt even worse being wrapped back up, but Hina resisted the urge to clench her fists. It would have only made things worse. Much worse, in fact.
"There, that should do you." Tsuya said, securing the end of the second bandage and stepping back to view her handiwork. Then, cutting a few inches off the end of the unused roll, the nurse reached up and dabbed away at the tears on her face. "You're doing a really good job of managing everything, you know."
"Yeah, three panic attacks a day is just wonderful." Hina blurted out, once again shaking her head after the fact.
"You're awake, you're aware, and you've got a lot of support. Which is more than I can say for some of our other patients." She replied evenly, and the hero looked away. "I know you don't see it as progress, but if you keep strong like you have been doing, you'll be out of here in no time. Take it from me."
Tsuya didn't bullshit with her, which Hina appreciated. It was also the reason she knew that the nurse wasn't just telling her what she wanted to hear, and that objectively Hina was in fact making progress. "...thanks."
"You're welcome." She gestured to the door. "Now, I believe you've got some visitors who've been waiting for us to finish up here."
"More visitors?" Her eyebrows shot up in shock.
"Mhmm." Tsuya gave a knowing grin, gesturing for her to follow her to the door. "They agreed to wait until you weren't in so much pain. Are you up for more socializing?"
"I..guess." She stuttered out, head shaking in confusion as she slid from the bed down to the floor. It was hard to fathom just how many people wanted to check on her. Did she really have so many friends? All these people coming to see her was a little disorienting. "I'm starting to feel like a circus side-show..."
Tsuya opened the door and lead the redhead further down the hallway. They were making their way to the recreation room again, Hina realized, and her nurse looked back, giving her another knowing smile.
"If you feel overwhelmed, just let us know. We can ask that they break into smaller groups. But they insisted on all coming together." She prefaced, opening the rec-room door with a twist of her wrist on the door handle. Hina was about to ask what she meant, but the sheer number of visitors practically explained itself.
"Hitagawa Sensei!" One of them exclaimed, and they all turned to see her walk inside with eager smiles. The entirety of Class 1-A stood in the rec-room, casually dressed and obviously here in their free time. It was the weekend. They must have all planned to visit after hearing that she was awake again.
"You guys..." She trailed off, feeling a well of appreciation for her students. All of them were here, even Bakugou, who stood towards the back with crossed arms. The redhead smiled, momentarily forgetting about the pain in her hands as they all came closer.
"Woah, hold on there." Tsuya said, stepping in front of them and holding her hands out in a stopping gesture. "Scarlet Seer is still in some pain, so please avoid any touching, but you're welcome to sit and talk with her awhile."
Chastened, the students stepped back and allowed the nurse to usher Hina through to a chair at the back of the room.
"I'll give you some time. Please call for one of us if you become overwhelmed. And kids, do try to keep the volume down. This is a place of healing, not an amusement park." She said, then let herself out of the room.
As soon as the door shut behind the black-haired nurse, the students began talking over one another to greet her and say how happy they were to see her. Hina only smiled and closed her eyes, taking in their high energy as much as she could. She'd missed this, the young, positive environment that her students provided her. God, she missed being back to work. It wasn't long before Iida was able to make himself stand out from the others.
"Everyone, we must speak in an orderly and quiet fashion so Hitagawa Sensei is not overwhelmed!" He called over the rest, though still at a much lower volume than she was used to from the class president. His suggestion finally took hold, and the students quieted down and began speaking one at a time.
"Are you ok, Hitagawa Sensei?" Hagakure asked, her shirt sleeves crossed in front of her. "We were all really worried when they said you weren't conscious."
"They wouldn't even tell us what happened..." Ojiro muttered, his tail curled around his feet in irritation.
Midoriya clenched his fists together and smiled. "All that matters is that she's back."
"You're...coming back soon, right?" Momo questioned, concern marking her face. Everyone looked at her, and she nodded.
"I still have some recovery to do first, but I will be coming back, yes."
Relief flooded the students. Had they really been so worried that she would quit? Or perhaps they really thought she'd been too injured to ever come back. How humbling...
"What did happen, Hitagawa Sensei?" Uraraka asked timidly. "None of the other teachers would tell us anything. Are you really ok?"
The rest of them went quiet, looking to her for an answer. She met a few of their gazes, then looked down at her hands. That familiar buzz of anxiety began in the pit of her stomach, and her hands ached with renewed fervor.
"I'm fine, right now at least." She chose her words carefully, knowing the students meant well but their curiosity could cause problems. "Please understand, I'm still working through what I...experienced...while I was away. In time, I'll be more comfortable with talking about what happened, but I'd prefer if you please not ask me about it right now."
The students nodded with shamed understanding, and before the mood became too glum, she smiled. "You might be here to see me, but I've been missing you all as well. I know that you all had your license exam a few days ago. I'd love to know how it went."
"You should have seen it, there were so many amazing quirks there!" Kirishima exclaimed. "The other schools had really strong students-"
"-and there was this game where we had to hit the targets on their bodies, kind of like dodgeball-" Denki said, bustling with energy.
"-Thanks to Aoyama, we were all able to find each other again and we all went to the next round-"
"-Gang Orca was so scary, the last part of the exam was tough, but we all"
Hina's eyes flitted from student to student, trying to piece their exam experience together from the disjointed explanations and overenthusiastic rambling. When one stopped to take a breath, another jumped in with their take on the exam.
They spoke of their high and low moments, and even when Todoroki admitted that Bakugo and himself hadn't passed, she reassured them of their future victory. Bakugo didn't say much at all, but Todoroki nodded thoughtfully. She reflected that he'd certainly become much kinder and open to help than he had been before.
Her smile was wide and content as they spoke about their experiences, her heart lighter than it had been all week. If this was just a small taste of what she'd get to have back in her life after returning to work, then come hell or high water, she'd claw her way back to the normal she used to know.
ns 15.158.61.20da2
