My eyes were trained outside the subway window. I absentmindedly watched the scenery as we breezed passed. I stood in the subway while gripping the guardrails to keep myself upright.
Jordyn and her friends were just a few feet away lost in their conversation that fell to death ears. It wasn't until I heard my name did I tear myself away from the window to eye the trio before me. Yessenia and Lucas held curious, expectant eyes while an irritated expression was etched across Jordyn's features. My eyes danced between them in confusion.
"Hmm?" My eyebrows rose. I brought my hand up from my side to gently graze my neck with my fingers. It provided some comfort from their burning stares.
"What was it like?" Yessenia questioned.
My confused expression continued to linger.
Jordyn sighed and rolled her eyes. "Maybe she's not ready to talk about it."
Lucas ran his fingers through his hair. I could tell he was uncomfortable about whatever situation was occurring between the two girls.
"Shouldn't she decide that for herself?" Yessenia retorted.
I pursed my lips and brought my hand back down to my side. Their attention was diverted to one another and more so, the girls eyed each other with frustration behind their eyes while Lucas looked as if he wanted to disappear.
"Fine!" Jordyn gave in begrudgingly. She shook her head with her thick curls falling to either side of her face. She drove the strands away with her hand. The anger behind her eyes lingered as she continued to eye Yessenia until she tore them away just as Yessenia did turning to me.
I swallowed nervously, not knowing what to expect.
"What was it like? Snapping away, I mean," she asked again.
"I-" my words fell short. I opened my mouth and was prepared to speak, but quickly realized, I didn't know what to say. Her question caught me by surprise. I searched my mind for something to satisfy her only to come to a blank even after a few moments passed by.
I stared ahead in between the trio while my ears began to ring. It felt as if the world slowed and we were the only ones present in the subway. The scenery dissolved and I returned to the restaurant where it all happened.
I felt my heart beat quicken and it lept as I looked into the terror stricken eyes of my family. My vision began to blur as the tears brimmed my eyes. I looked down at myself and waited for the moment I knew was soon to come. Knowing my fate didn't make it less daunting. Panic set in the moment my hand began to disappear. I looked to my father and what I wanted most in the world was to feel his arms wrapped around me once again.
"Jess?"
I snapped out of my reverie. The subtle sounds of the subway filled my ears and I was once again staring back at Jordyn and her friends. My breathing slowed and I blinked the tears away.
"I told you she's not-"
"I-It's fine," I told Jordyn. She looked at me with sad eyes and I attempted to provide her with an assuring smile. I took a deep, shaky breath and tried to find the courage within to talk about something I wanted nothing more than to forget.
"It all happened so fast," I started. I tried swallowing down the nerves that began to creep in by reminding myself I was safe now. I returned from whatever that phenomena was and I wanted that to be enough. "One second the restaurant staff was singing happy birthday to me, then the next, I was watching myself disappear."
"We were running towards the restaurant doors trying to run from the mayhem. I held my father's hand on the way, but I felt him slip away and when I looked," I gazed down at my hand and formed a fist, "my hand was disappearing." I wiped a stray tear that fell from my eye.
"Physically, I didn't feel a thing. When all of me disappeared, everything just turned dark. The scariest part was thinking I'd never see my family again." When I finished, silence fell. I finally tore my eyes away from my hand and looked to search their faces. Each of them look to be in thought with sad, downcast eyes, digesting my words. My gaze fell to Yessenia who adjusted the bag on her shoulder and sighed before crossing her arms over her chest.
The subway slowed to a stop. People around us shifted and maneuvered off the now open doors but we remained still in our standing position. The doors shut closed and we began to move once again. My eyes shifted to that of the other passengers and I wondered if any suffered the same fate as I did.
"I'm sorry for making you talk about it," Yessenia broke the silence.
My brows furrowed as I turned to her. "No reason to apologize, I wanted to."
Her lips turned slightly to form a small smile. She turned and nudged Jordyn with her elbow and immediately, my sister rolled her eyes. "What was that you were saying?" She teased.
"Shut up."
Lucas, who'd been silent, let out a snicker with Yessenia. I was grateful for the change of mood within the small group and felt the anxiousness within me lessen. It'd taken a lot to talk about it, but maybe it'd do some amount of good to do so.
The bickering between the girls recommenced, but just as before, their conversation fell to death ears as I turned my attention to the window. This time, I stared at the reflection of the girl within it and into her deep brown eyes. Although her lips were turned up into a small smile, there was sadness behind her eyes.
I searched my face before they traveled to the thick hair atop my head that I somehow managed to pull into a ponytail. Loose strands of curls fell on both sides of my face. I continued to find it astonishing how five years went by and I appeared to be the same girl I was before. I sighed and tore my eyes away. At the same time, the subway slowed and I turned back to Jordyn and her friends. Their voices finally reached my ears.
"Want to make a bet?"
I inched closer to Lucas to whisper, "what is happening?" Yessenia and Jordyn eyed each other. My sister had her arms crossed over her chest. She attempted to feign seriousness but a smile spread to her lips. She pulled them into a thin line and held in the laughter that threatened to fall.
"Bet. Loser owes the winner a favor and can call it in whenever," Jordyn told her.
"Just a classic back and forth about who is better at bowling," Lucas started with a bored expression to his face. He turned to me, "if you ask me, they both suck."
I snickered.
"Excuse me?" The girls said at the same time. My laughter quickly subsided.
"Let's make it a team effort," Jordyn declared.
"Whoa, what? No thank-"
"Drew Crew versus Yessenia and Lucas."
I sucked in my teeth just as Lucas shifted uncomfortably in his stance. He clutched his shoulder bag and cleared his throat. "I do not agree with this."
"I haven't played in over five years," I added.
"Seems the Drew Crew is already at a disadvantage," Yessenia teased.
Something awoke from inside me. My eyebrow rose at her comment and I moved to where I was now standing beside Jordyn. She eyed me and I rose my hand and pulled it into a fist. She caught my intention and collided her fist with my own. "They don't call us the Drew Crew for nothing though. Be prepared to lose."
Yessenia laughed. "I like the confidence."
"Is no one hearing me? I need off this train-"
Yessenia grabbed Lucas by the collar as he tried to walk away. "Where the hell are you going? We need to come up with a game plan."
I fell into laughter at the two of them. They went back and forth and Lucas continued to tell Yessenia how he did not want any part of their competition. While he spoke animatedly with his hands, she rolled her eyes and pulled the hair tie from her hair, resulting in her locks to fall down her shoulders. It was pulled together again and into a messy bun atop her head. When she finished, the Latina brought her hands to her hips and scolded Lucas for how lazy he is.
It hit me that these were the people that were there for Jordyn when I wasn't. Although they seemed a mess, it was how their friend dynamic worked, I figured. But I was grateful for them. Something compelled her to transfer schools and this was the result of that. Life didn't stop for my family or others in my absence. Attending Midtown didn't sound like such a bad idea when I had people to lean on.
I'm not sure why the things that happened, happened, but I was happy with getting another chance at life. Right now that meant enjoying the company of my sister and her friends in a competitive bowling match.
SPIDER-WOMAN: *~* ORIGIN
My eyes scanned the bowling lanes as we walked past. Each of the lanes' gutters were lined with blue lights. Additional lighting from the ceiling lit the paths and contrasted that of the dim lighting from the entrance to the bowling stations.
Nearby I watched as a young child with a ball in hand was accompanied by an adult who aided the child in carrying the ball. They walked the short distance to the bolded line along the lane and released the ball onto it. Rods along the gutters prevented it from entering and scaled the side until it reached the pins at the end, resulting in a few knocking over. They cheered excitedly and was cause for the small smile spreading to my lips.
I followed behind Lucas, Yessenia, and Jordyn as they walked the path to our assigned bowling station with our shoes in hand. I gaped at the tv screens at each station and took in their themes until we came to a stop. The trio took the empty seats, sat their bags down and began switching out their shoes. I quickly followed in suit.
"I'm not holding back since I'm being forced to do this. Prepare to meet your maker," Lucas taunted with a maniacal laugh.
Yessenia snorted before turning to me as she slipped on the bowling shoes. "He says that but a couple months ago-"
"Sen, whose team are you on? In any case, that's in the past and should be left there. We must look to our bright futures."
Yessenia and Jordyn exchanged a look before falling out into laughter.
"I don't remember telling a joke."
His comment only drove the two to laugh harder and earned looks from the others present in the building. I gazed at the two in wonder of the inside joke but also in gratitude and slight envy. I was grateful for the support system my sister had but a part of me couldn't help but feel a tinge of jealousy at the bonds she created within the five years I was gone. I could've been there- I should've been there. Instead I was--
I don't even know what I was. Dead? Asleep?
Their dying laughter pulled me out of my reverie. I looked down and took in the unfashionable bowling shoes now at my feet. What made it even worse, was adjusting the tightness using the Velcro strap.
Lucas rose from his sitting position and walked towards the controls. He selected the option to enter in our names and began with the letter J. "Go fetch the balls, ladies."
My eyes scaled the long shelf of bowling balls and I gravitated towards the ones with bright, pretty colors. I gripped a pink one with the number 7 on it and placed my fingers into the inserts to lift it from its place to give it a feel. The holes were an adequate size for my fingers and the ball had a sufficient weight to it.
"Did you find one?" My sister wondered, appearing beside me with a blue ball in her possession.
I shrugged and continued moving the ball around with my right hand. "Yeah, I think so."
With our selected bowling balls in hand, we maneuvered towards Lucas and Yessenia at our station, inserting our names into the game. I looked to the screen to find JD, Jess, and Sen stored on the screen with the start of Lucas's nickname being typed in.
"Saved the best for last," I heard him murmur.
My mind searched for the last time I bowled and how long ago it might have been but I came up blank. Our family would go every once in awhile. I wondered if I remembered how to play or more so, how to throw the bowl well enough to knock some pins down.
The object of the game was obvious. I didn't want to be the one to drag the team down. Nonetheless, I told myself to enjoy the game no matter the outcome. I wouldn't mind owing someone a favor. If money was involved, that'd be a different story.
I placed my bowling ball onto the resurfacing machine and at the same time, my sister carried hers with her onto the lane as she was the first one up.
"Let me show you all how it's done!" Confidence and enthusiasm poured from her voice. I watched from where I stood as she held a position. She walked forward and moved the ball forward and launched it to roll onto the floor. It quickly made its way into the gutter.
"Is this the part where you show us how it's done?" Yessenia taunted.
I chuckled but pursed my lips as Jordyn looked over her shoulder to shoot all of us a grimace. "I'm just warming up," she declared.
"Oh, of course. Take your time," Lucas told her while grinning.
My sister waited for the resurfacing machine to shoot out her ball. She lifted it from the railing once it did and took a few steps onto the lane to get into position to launch the ball. This time, the ball glided down the middle and knocked all the pins down.
"Yeah!" I shouted. I clapped and gave her a high five as she came down from the wooden panel to where we stood. "You all are quiet now. Getting scared?" I asked while turning to our opponents. They exchanged glances and waved my comment away.
I took their silence as a victory and made my up the wooden panel to the resurfacing machine where my ball rested. When I turned to eye the bowling lane, the pins were returning to their previous state. I positioned the ball within my hand and took a few paces forward before releasing the ball from my grip. It spun down the center but began maneuvering to the left. It managed to stay out of the gutter and knocked down four pins.
"Not bad!" Jordyn cheered behind me.
I smiled at her encouragement. I waited for the ball to resurface and repeated the same motion as before. The ball knocked over the rest of the pins, earning a spare. I thrust my arm in the air and turned to face the others.
With a smile, Lucas stated, "you're up, Sen."
She tightened the hair tie atop her head and strutted to the resurfacing machine to grab her ball.
"How did you all meet?" I asked aloud.
Ahead, Yessenia's ball grazed the gutter the entire way day and knocked one pin over. She turned to us with a grimace while awaiting her ball. "Group project!" She called back in answer.
"We hated every second of it," Lucas declared.
I snickered. "It couldn't have been that bad." I turned to Jordyn to find the girl with a pained expression to her features.
"It was actually that bad. I don't understand how we're friends." Despite her words, she fell into laughter.
Yessenia returned after not knocking any pins down her second turn and sat in a nearby chair. "Lazybones over here did the bare minimum-"
"Oh, and you put in a lot of effort, right?" Lucas clapped back.
"I didn't say that."
"I rest my case." Lucas pushed himself off the chair and walked to grab his ball.
I chewed the inside of my lip to keep myself from laughing. Yessenia followed him through squinted eyes, possibly setting him ablaze in her mind. His slender fingers went into the inserts of his ball to grip and he prepared to walk the short distance to the bolded line of the lane.
Yessenia rolled her eyes and cast her gaze upon me. "Well, Zee kept us in line, I'll tell you that."
"He dictated everything and everyone," Jordyn added.
My eyes bounced between the two girls expectantly. I waited for the details about what made this group project such a torturous adventure. My eyebrows wrinkled in confusion. "I mean, you have to have someone take the lead though, right? Or else everything'll fall apart."
"True," Lucas started as he plopped into his chair. I looked passed his shoulder to find the lane riddled with fallen pins. The pinsetter machine descended and returned the pins to their natural state. My eyes wandered to the scoreboard to find he managed a spare. When my eyes returned, a knowing smile was fixed on his features when his gaze met mine. "But how many leaders do you know create schedules for people in the group?"
"Sounds like he gave you," I pointed between Lucas and Yessenia, "no room to be lazy. He knew what he was working with and he decided to get ahead of it." I shrugged my shoulders.
The group fell silent.
They gaped at me with blank expressions.
"What?"
"Son of a bitch, I didn't think of it that way." Yessenia sucked her teeth.
Jordyn rose from her seat in laughter before making a beeline to the resurfacing machine for her ball.
"What did you all end up making on the project?" I inquired.
"We made a d minus," Lucas deadpanned, shrugging. "Only so much you can do to get ahead, I guess."
I cackled with no restraint. How they all became friends was beyond me at this point. If I were Zane, I'd avoid them at all cost. I couldn't imagine putting in all that effort just to get a D and know my group mates were responsible. This is why group projects shouldn't be a thing.
"You're up," my sister instructed, reappearing at the table. I glanced upward to the scoreboard to see she earned a strike. I gave her a fist bump and rose to my feet. With my ball in hand, I walked the short distance to the bold line and released the ball. First, I knocked down six pins and missed the last four my second shot.
"What was your project on?" I asked, taking my seat once again.
"Federal agencies injecting drugs into black communities," an unknown voice muttered. I contemplated the words before realizing the voice didn't belong to anyone currently seated at the table. I took in their stark expressions and met their gaze to find Zane providing a subtle wave. He pulled a chair to our table.
"So you decided to come," Yessenia noted.
"It was this or watch Finding Nemo for the thousandth time with my brother."
"Had we known you were coming, we would have put your name in," Lucas said.
Zane waved him off and leaned back to rest against his chair. "Nah, don't sweat it. I don't mind watching. Who's winning?"
"Who else?" Lucas stated matter-of-factly.
Jordyn scoffed. "Now, wait a minute. Who just got a strike?"
"I've been consistently sucking. I think that deserves some praise." Yessenia waited expectantly. When no one said anything, she rolled her eyes and pushed herself to her feet and bowled her turns. Her ball rolled down the gutter both turns.
Zane slow clapped while she turned from the lane and made her way back to her seat. "Praise for consistently sucking."
She nodded her head pleasingly at Zane's actions. "You all should be more supportive like Zane."
"Noted," Lucas chuckled. "Anyway, bevs? It's on me."
The group provided their drink requests. He made note of them and together, Yessenia and him made their way to the counter to order. That left Jordyn, Zane and I alone at the table with Luke's name blinking on screen signaling his turn. My gaze fell to the table as silence fell. I noticed Zane's hands folded on the table and he began to fiddle with his thumbs. His brow rose and his gaze met mine.
"Has this group convinced you not to transfer to M-Town yet?"
I let out a small laugh while my sister grimaced. "We're not that bad."
"Have you seen Sen and Luke? They're a mess."
I cackled once more before shrugging my shoulders. "Aren't we all? I think you're all a lively group. This has been a nice distraction from... things."
Silence had fallen once again. The atmosphere changed with Zane's presence. His vibe was different from the others and it wasn't just from his outburst earlier in the school hall. Or maybe it was just me reading too much into things.
He nodded subtly and his gaze wandered to that of his hands against the table. "Describe it then."
My brows rose in confusion. "Describe it?"
His eyes rose to meet mine. "Your mess, I mean. What are we distracting you from?"
"Zane," Jordyn warned.
"I can start things off if you'd like. Let's see," he drummed his fingers against the table in thought, "I watched my mother turn to dust five years ago. She, a single mother, provided everything for my little brother and I.
Then I had to boss up and do what I needed to do to make sure my brother had food in his stomach and clean clothes on his back. Then there was tuition for both of our schools. You know what a twelve year old boy should worry about? Just being a kid, not how to survive. So I ask again, describe your mess."
"The hell is the matter with you?" Jordyn snapped. "You act like you're the only one at this table whose suffered. Everyone's mess is different, Zane."
He laughed halfheartedly. I felt the anger rise within me as arrogance poured from him. "I'm just trying to understand what's to complain about after a five year nap."
I searched his features. The longer I gazed at him, the more my heart roared in frustration and anger at his words. His dark eyes glanced between my sister and I.
I breathed out, "your ignorance is one."
I didn't want to play into his game, whatever it was, and yet he won by getting a rise out of me.
He guffawed just as Lucas and Yessenia returned with the drinks and placed them on the table. They were silent, reading into the tense atmosphere between us. They gazed in wonder and silently assessed.
Zane snapped his fingers in realization. "That's right, your dad. Did they find who did it?" He grabbed his beverage and took a sip while eyeing us expectantly.
My brows furrowed in confusion. I looked to Jordyn for an answer to find my sister's eyes staring coldly into Zane's.
My blood went cold. "What's he talking about?"
"Oh, Jesus," Lucas breathed out.
"You didn't tell her?" Yessenia wondered.
"Tell me what?" Panic rose in my voice.
"I-" Jordyn ran a hand through her thick curls before turning to me. Her eyes welled with tears. "Mom and I were going to tell you-"
"Tell me what, Jordyn?!"
"Dad didn't just die. He was killed."
ns 15.158.61.12da2
