Bored as all hell, Kunie took out her phone and went onto the school’s Friendful group. She was lying on her bed and scrolling through the page when she came across Atsuji’s stories.
She found herself laughing at the witty narration but it was the serious moments that stood out to her.
He shouldn’t have felt good. How could we, when his heart was twisting until he almost couldn’t breathe? How could he possibly enjoy the feeling of walking in glass skin, ready to shatter at any hint of rejection? Yet, he continued walking, in hopes that he could get just a little bit closer to her.
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She needed no protection, yet he felt a desire deep in the pit of his gut to protect her anyway. Or maybe he was confusing that with the desire to hold her close and brush her soft hair behind her ear.
Kunie remembered Masami’s habit of tucking her hair behind her ear. She pictured herself pushing her hair back, leaning in until she was ever so close to her lips.
Realisation crashed into her, breaking the glass in her face. Tears seeped out of the cracks. In her mind, the beautiful Takarazuka actor bowed to Masami and stepped back until she was among the other cast members and Masami was right at the front of the stage. Masami’s skin glowed under the spotlight. Why did it have to glow so much?
Kunie wiped her eyes but the tears kept coming. The lovely image of Masami on stage was quickly replaced with Dooru’s smug face.
After turning off her phone, Kunie took to staring at the ceiling until the ceiling appeared to be mocking her with memories of Masami. When that happened, she closed her eyes and screamed into her pillow.
Meanwhile, I tied Masami’s red string around Kunie’s pinky. As soon as I did this, I noticed how thin and frail the string was. That tempted me to enter the human world and scream into a pillow as well, but alas I had to keep at least a little distance. Destiny was in the hands of these two girls.
Apparently there’s a hangover for excessive crying, or at least Kunie felt something similar to that the next morning. The lack of sleep certainly didn’t help.
She could barely muster a hello to her classmates. To wake herself up she bought a dozen or so food items from the vending machine and ate as quickly as possible, creating a pile of rubbish all over her desk.
As soon as Masami saw the mess, she opened her mouth to complain, but then she saw the bags under Kunie’s eyes and bit back her words. Sahana asked her if something was wrong and Kunie didn’t respond for a while.
‘Nothing,’ Kunie eventually murmured, looking into her eyes and feeling every part of her body tense up. Sahana, who was walking back to Toyomi’s desk, was the girl who had defended her honour. Her honour as a perfectly straight girl who was definitely not crushing on their mutual friend.
‘Just because she has short hair doesn't make her a lesbian. Kunie is a wonderful person and I don't think she deserves you being so mean to her!’
That line repeated in her head, getting more distorted as time went on. Each time, the sound of Sahana’s laughter got louder and louder.
‘... doesn’t make her a lesbian. Kunie is a wonderful person.’
‘Kunie is a wonderful person. She’s not a lesbian.’
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‘She couldn’t be a lesbian. She’s a wonderful person.’
Kunie choked on the piece of melon bread in her mouth. She spit it out and, as she returned to reality, she discovered that the laughter came from Sahana as she chatted with Toyomi at his desk near the front. Like she always did.
There was only a few tables’ worth of distance between Kunie and Sahana, yet it felt like they were in completely different schools. Kunie gritted her teeth and looked away, tearing another bite out of her melon bread. She left the choke-causing piece on the table.
Seeing that let Masami know that enough was enough. ‘Something’s clearly annoying you,’ she said, crossing her arms. ‘What is it?’ Kunie frowned. ‘Why can’t you tell us?’
Dooru sniggered. ‘Maybe she got dumped by a girl.’
‘Fuck off, Dooru,’ Kunie said.
‘If you hate me so much, call me by my surname and see how Ukiwa reacts.’
‘Like I give a fuck.’
‘Seriously, what’s going on?’ Masami asked. ‘Dooru’s not helping, but you know Sahana and I are usually nice to you. Did we do something to make you-’
‘I’m not worth your kindness.’
The lack of confidence startled Masami. ‘Why not?’
Kunie shoved the rest of the melon bread in her mouth and curled her hands into fists. ‘You wouldn’t get it.’
‘Try me. We get each other more than anyone else I know.’
Finally, Kunie looked up at Masami. She couldn’t help but smile, even if the burning in her cheeks soon got annoying. The morning sunlight from the window illuminated Masami’s face until she looked like the glowing Masami from her daydream.
‘You’re right. I’m sorry. I’ll be fine in a bit. I just didn’t get much sleep last night.’
Masami’s giggle tickled Kunie’s ears. ‘That’s it? I think most people get what it feels like to have trouble sleeping. What kept you up last night?’
‘Uh, homework, yeah. But don’t worry too much. I’m doing pretty well in class. I just didn’t plan my studying schedule very well, haha.’
‘Fair enough. Ukiwa’s still late, so you can take a nap now if you want.’
Kunie held up some empty packets from the various sugary snacks she ate. ‘I should be fine for now.’
The two chatted for a good half hour, Ukiwa running later than ever for the weekly hour-long homeroom. Kunie was mostly paying attention to the glowing girl in front of her, but occasionally she would sneak a glance at the happy couple that was Toyomi and Sahana. They seemed to pay no attention to her and existed in their own little world. Their own little perfect world where they could love each other and not get crap for it. A world where they could, if they wanted to, judge Kunie’s feelings without Kunie even hearing them.
Whenever she saw Kunie scowl at the couple, Masami felt her heart crack. Each time this happened, she put her hand on top of Kunie’s fist and changed the subject, praying that Kunie would return her attention to her and forget whatever was really troubling her. She would lean in closer to help her with this task. It worked every time.
By the end of the half-hour, Kunie and Masami were inches apart. The sliding of the classroom door and the click-clacking of high heels pushed them away. Their panicked faces almost made Dooru spit a rat king of remarks but Ukiwa’s voice robbed her of that chance.
Ukiwa called the roll as quickly as she could and then asked everyone how they were doing. The students groaned, except for Kunie, who was too busy glaring at Sahana sitting on Toyomi’s lap to notice anything her homeroom teacher said.
When lunch rolled around, Sahana stopped to chat with Kunie. ‘You feeling better now?’
Kunie nodded, forcing a smile. ‘Yeah, it’s all good. Now go have fun with your boyfriend.’ She thanked her ancestors that she managed to say that with a convincing amount of ‘sincerity’. Sahana nodded and took Toyomi’s hand, resting her head on his shoulder as the two strolled out of the classroom.
Kunie and Masami went on an expedition to whatever room they could find to eat their lunch in. On their journey, they ran into Atsuji. Kunie considered complimenting him on his excellent stories, but the painful emotions they had stirred in her that night put a cork in her vocal cords. She could only nod as she passed by him.
The pair of friends eventually gave up on finding a spot and went to their usual spot in the Home Ec room. Masami cooked up a quick dish of cereal ramen. Kunie laughed in between crunches as the mix polluted her taste buds.
‘You’ve outdone yourself in terribleness,’ she said. ‘Do I taste soy sauce on these flakes?’
Masami pouted. ‘I will make a weird dish that you end up enjoying.’
Kunie put her hand on Masami’s. ‘I’m sure you will.’
As soon as her hand registered the heat of Masami’s, she let go. Masami bit her lip and brushed her hair behind her ear. It took all of Kunie’s energy not to hug her right there.
I noticed the red string connecting the two girls growing a little bit thicker and sturdier.
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