Note: this is an emotional chapter 馃槶 I'm sorry, Lord Wenchang.
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Fengjiu, followed by Wenchang, followed the purple-robed figure from where it materialised in the Sky Kingdom, all the way to Taichen Palace. Upon arriving at the palace, she saw that the figure had found its way into Donghua's bedroom. She tried as hard as she could to open the door to the bedroom but the door would not budge.
Wenchang could only watch in pain as the person he loved most desperately knocked and begged for Donghua to open the door. The pain of seeing his beloved amidst tears and crying for someone else broke his heart in so many places. In spite of being heartbroken, he was also left dumbfounded and destitute by the fact that he was powerless to help the woman he loved most.
Since taking over as lord of Taichen Palace, he had never ever set foot in that majestic bedroom. He could only imagine how the interior of the room looked like, probably with purple velvet blankets, writing materials and diningware fit for an emperor. Since Fengjiu was so persistent to have a word with the Dijun, the sympathetic Chong Lin could only request for Wenchang to assist him in convincing Fengjiu to return to her chambers and promised that he would call immediately for her once Dijun was willing to see her. Seeing how genuine Chong Lin's intention was, Wenchang relented.
Wenchang tenderly led Fengjiu away from the door of the Dijun's bedroom to the living room and continuously persuaded her to take a rest and wait for Chong Lin to come back with good news, but she was determined that the Dijun would see her. With her eyes filled with tears, she furiously yelled at Wenchang that he should let her be if he was unwilling to help her get into the room. Knowing her stubborn personality, Wenchang realised that nothing was going to change her mindset that she would not rest her mind till she had spoken to Dijun. Heartbroken, Wenchang released his hold on her and retired his own chambers, resorting to drinking to clear his thoughts and numb the throbbing pain in his chest. He recalled how Fengjiu was still crying and calling the Dijun's name outside the bedroom, and he had never felt more devastated. While love was sweet, fate had a strange way of playing jokes on them.聽If fate was decided by heaven, why allow him to fall in love with her and yet, let the Dijun of her heart come back suddenly? Wenchang couldn't understand.
Chong Lin understood Wenchang's plight and called for Siming, which Wenchang allowed to enter his room. The minute he entered, Siming was baffled to see that the intelligent lord was a huge emotional mess with five jars of wine on the floor and still holding one in his hand. He noted that this was a huge change from his usual, emotionless self since he had came back from serving his punishment in the mortal realm. While Seventy-Three was a lively young immortal, Lord Wenchang had turned into an expert in hiding his feelings. Perhaps it had been the pain of losing his mortal mother and everything in life he had strived to be in his mother's sake. And this seemingly emotionless lord had been undone by a woman.
Siming was glad that the Dijun had came back but at the same time, he was concerned about Wenchang's emotional state. He knew Wenchang was broken inside, but yet, the tough lord would not shed even a single tear. He appeared to be in a trance, continuously repeating to himself, "she loves him, not you, Wenchang. It's not your fault that he came before you." Upon seeing Siming he faked a smile and gave him his thanks. Then he asked about the Queen. Siming informed him what Chong Lin had told him, that she was still waiting outside the Dijun's chambers. Siming looked sad and asked him if he needed to talk, but Wenchang insisted he was fine and just needed to be alone. The Star Lord politely bowed with clasped hands and left the room, leaving Wenchang to his own devices.
Chong Lin served Fengjiu Dragonwell tea from with Donghua's prized tea set, but Fengjiu was too depressed to even look away from the door. She had decided to keep vigil by sitting by the door to Donghua's bedroom, and as a result, the kind-hearted Chong Lin could only leave the tea set on a small bedside table that he placed nearby where Fengjiu was sitting. Her eyes had been puffy from the continuous crying. For hours she had been calling out to Dijun until her voice was almost hoarse, urging him to come out his room or at least, let her take a look at him. She felt rejected by him, and hadn't know what she had done wrong to deserve his cold treatment. He had acted like he could not hear her or did not recognise her, the then familiar feeling had been like that of a stranger. What had happened to Donghua?
Meanwhile, Wenchang succumbed to his alcohol intolerance and in a state of intoxication, started rummaging his wardrobe for the celestial outfit that had been gifted to him by the Heavenly Couple, the Sky Emperor and Empress. Reluctantly he retrieved a gown of superior brocade from the upper drawer. The gown was a bright red in colour, as red as the phoenix birthmark on Fengjiu's forehead. It was adorned with the most beautiful and valuable of the gems in the Sky Kingdom, and enchanted with magic. Under the lighting of his bedroom, it glowed faintly with a purple tint.聽
The brokenhearted immortal donned the ceremonial robe with a single wave of his hand. He reflected on the painful moments that had plagued him since his childhood. He contemplated how every immortal he knew had regarded him as the Dijun's incarnation or compared him to the Dijun due to his unique hair colour, how he had been expected to be a replacement to Fengjiu because he looked like the Dijun and how he would never be the lover in Fengjiu's heart. In his thoughts, he had聽never聽wanted to be the Dijun or to replace him in Fengjiu's heart. Despite his major achievements, he had always behaved humbly and regarded himself as a lowly immortal. Many junior immortals who didn't know him well, had nicknamed him 'the extra', indicating that he was just a replacement in Fengjiu's heart. When he had fallen in love with Fengjiu at first sight, he had never expected himself to be worthy of her love.聽
Seeing how lonely she had seemed to be with her apparent loss of her beloved, he had endeavoured to divert her attention to him and to heal the wounds in her heart. He had not expected her to return his love. But then five years had passed. They had spent uncountable聽 and memorable moments together in these five years. With every moment spent together, he had felt much closer to the queen. And now, he had really fallen head over heels in love with her. Unfortunately for him, her heart could only admit for one person, and it would never be him. He had lost the battle even before it started. Even after all the times they had spent together in Qingqiu, she had only regarded him as a best friend like Cheng Yu. His engagement to her had been just a political union, and would only be one marked by their signatures on parchment. A聽paper marriage.聽Perhaps, if he was just an ordinary immortal, she wouldn't even give him a second glance at all.聽
If only he was Donghua Dijun, he wished he could one day, wake up with the Dijun's memories. He was envious of this immortal, who had everything he had wanted to have - Fengjiu. He hated himself and how he had been born with white hair like the Dijun. He detested himself for being a weakling and not being able to openly pursue and obtain her affections. He had long heard of her unrequited love for the Dijun, which had been mainly because they were simply not fated for each other. A thought had once came to him, that what if he had, on one occasion, pretended to be the Dijun of her heart? Would she have given her heart to him and loved him like she had loved the Dijun, even to the extent of satisfying all his fantasies? While he reckoned a plan like that was possible, he couldn't bear the thought of hurting her with his deception. Furthermore, he was a disciple of the Kunlun Mountains, and could not resort to such trickery and unscrupulous means. While he loved her, he could never lie to her. Even if it was just once, it was after all, cheating her. And so he had banished the thought of impersonating the Dijun from his mind.
All this time, he had been in denial of the truth. He had thought that perhaps one day, fate would take over and allow them to be together at last. He had believed that one day, with his sincerity and undying love for her, he would finally touch her heart and she would accept him. He realised that perhaps, it was all wishful thinking on his part, and he was merely imagining it all. He could only admire the unwavering love Fengjiu had for her lost lover, while he drowned himself in alcohol.
And it had been evident now that her one true love had returned. What was then to become of him? The Dijun was after all, the true lord of Taichen Palace, while he was just someone Hao De saw as a substitute. Furthermore in terms of his age, experience and capability, he was way below the Dijun. His loss of status was secondary. He was concerned about how Fengjiu would fare.聽The Dijun was avoiding her and would not respond to her cries. He was envious and enraged at this Dijun. The seemingly perfect Fengjiu had just thrown herself at his feet and he had just locked the door. How could he do this, he asked himself. Seeing her hurt had hurt him even more. He wished he could be there beside her all the time to hold her in his arms and cup her dainty face in his cheeks to kiss her and give her all the love she deserved and needed. But sadly, the person in her heart would never ever be him.聽
He reminisced in every moment they had spent during Fengjiu's revisions and going through her homework, how he had taught her how to play go and how to fish, and how they had went stargazing and boat paddling that night, six months earlier. His chest throbbed harder and at the same time, his head was about to split into two from the headache that he was having. He looked in the mirror on the table, at his self wearing the red robe.聽Love,聽he repeated after himself,聽Love, Love, Love. What is it?
It was as if he was living in a mortal trial himself, like in the books.聽
From the slightly ajar window, Siming peeked inside and watched his old friend miserably. As the lord of destinies and having seen a lot of mortal fates, he had a big heart, but when it came to Wenchang's relationship issues with Fengjiu, he knew there was no way for him to help Wenchang. He could only wish the best for him.
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