“I L-O-V-E Y-O-U.”
Enter.
A small square of two arrows, hollow in the middle, materialized for a second before disappearing as the text cloud popped up over my head.
Leaning back hazardously far in my chair, I gulped in air, my heart pounding like the thunder before lightning.
It was all in a game. It was all just in a game. The repeated line did little to sway my throbbing heart.
For me, at least, a love confession in-game was little different from one in real life. It didn’t help that I had never cultivated a crush before much less made a show of it. I was entirely new to these feelings, and I wasn’t yet sure how one was supposed to react to them.
Before me her avatar remained immobile. I hoped because she was typing a response. That’s how I imagined it went anyway.
I was new to confessing, but I had done my research. A mix of internet searching, TV shows, and preconceptions gave me the slightest confidence boost. The fact that this was in a game also upped my odds by 40%, or so I reckoned.
The whole charade, however, felt out of order.
We had been married in-game for nearly a year now. It all began when we were both nobodies, completely new to the game, but happened to continually party up. We both took pride in our solo playing, but that only took you so far in the game. After grinding through a particularly tough dungeon, we ended with health bars that were quite nearly knocking on death’s door. And then she asked it.
“Do you want to get married?”
I was flustered, but at that point a marriage online seemed little more than an elaborate farce or poorly conceived joke to me. But before I could dwell too long on the proposal, she explained her reasoning.
“You know, there are a lot of health benefits for married couples and boosts in stats. Like that one healing spell we see couples use occasionally, remember? Anyways, it’d make grinding much more convenient, don’t you think?”
And so we had gotten married. A simple ceremony in-game, no guests even invited to attend. I had laughed at the absurdity of it all at the time. But here I was, a year later, with actual feelings for her.
The charade ended suddenly, however.
I was brought back to reality quickly from my rambling thoughts and poor attempt to distance myself from the pending reply when another text bubble appeared on my monitor, this time from her.
Surprised, I nearly fell off my chair as I struggled to lean forward once more to read the message before it faded away.
"I'm sorry..." It began and immediately I felt my heart begin to sink. I didn't want to read the rest, I could already imagine how it went.
"I'm sorry, but I don't have feelings like that for you." Then our marriage would dissolve and she'd slowly make a point of disappearing from my life. After all, the real world and the game world weren't supposed to mix, even I knew that. What was the purpose of escaping into a game if reality tried to follow in after you? So it was no wonder that she would turn me down, that her response would begin with an apology. But as the confessor, I had an obligation to face my verdict.
"I'm sorry, but now's not a good time. Let's talk later."
I blinked after I finished reading the message, letting my eyes scan over the words again in case I had misread them. Then I shook my head, but the words still remained unchanged.
Had I not been rejected then?
No. Maybe not flat out, but all I could take from her message was that I hadn't been accepted.
Turning to the screen once more, I found the words already fading as well as her avatar. A notice flashed at the bottom of the screen in bright red letters.
Player Sato has logged off of the game.
I had finally worked up the courage to confess my feelings, even if it was just in an online game to a player I had never actually met in real life. And I had received a response, as many questions as it raised. And yet, somehow I still felt as if her reply was still pending.
To be continued???
ns 15.158.61.20da2
