每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZqjtefTewL
輕嘆一聲。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3gHZmhiqi
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzWixdNOp6g
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUJL2h6mDI
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0AwB2M27bA
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH36gSNHkqs
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjjSW1YQvb
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpEBSpj3koc
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Ed6OJG2IY
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2f2BlfFDGJ
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPzRzk5uuaO
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ317UIfveoX
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKHVdKsFe3
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXJN9JAZNOR
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNMuy6RfGcK
他百思不得其解。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtkULEeA7p
再聲輕嘆。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgvZwMgp1Ow
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlfJCRcNMQB
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMerfTX2UjY
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzV4iEY71m2
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjajad3rORl
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFWJPqkFz30
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7R41KVCFw3
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKH8j5Gq6v7
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2jIyTck66Q
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9cmfHqz57x
緣起緣滅，不由自主。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEUM1KN0S5
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEq9I7SN5Jg
既要緣滅，何必緣起？309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTjH0cnsJqv
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTOmmXY7Wy
他百思不得其解。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6AoZRNVjuJ
輕嘆有三。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTFyU53ebM
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1qjC6LV1rA
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ26cyWmqRxT
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrcZkxaXjPd
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJJRiNu1TK
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRzNcYiKQQP
鬱悶。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8cwwF6St4E
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiKgvLZwJr6
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwl5mxX2DtG
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0qTLHSl9z5
去抱！去奪！309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdag0mBLdqM
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlmRx5l6nYS
抱甚麼？腿已不在。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadsP27L1NJ
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBKcaWtU4Kh
奪甚麼？球已不在。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH0lHQWNpfU
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuqZA2gGj8o
為何不在？為何統統不在？309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVJhxlDyr92
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL56kd2c5M0
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU55CnBiG5b
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvPtzHw0nt
停下來！309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQrKXWtuZrI
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTSjeWtJxZc
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEd2Syk8vO
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR2xK0RJmze
慢下來！309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsop5DDwuzi
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1bfn5uWatI
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv2Op8kY1qI
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBemwwbNsKT
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMJgS6vrms
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoEjEf0tx0R
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2742ezDEp
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4wgMUtWh9c
昔日的他，今日的孫。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzHISuQKbx
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxWOUdNMlF
永劫，輪迴。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ4szL2n80h
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAuNae4tLA
不敢思，不求解。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUIuknuDZMs
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWBWpSV7H0N
嘆，嘆，嘆。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡukGmegs8o6
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyO2uA4h4sM
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg5i3nouaZn
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrHe1WGvqa3
他搖頭。309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnyrvqhbgwz
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoC6qdxm7No
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmXRx10NptB
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOG0aRN4Cgu
