每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGdNJXbNOgK
輕嘆一聲。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡULRW8cNLd3
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjDaq1ZXRQS
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLIMuu63jus
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmdnPjpcdKc
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnqb5M4kYXG
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYosWeTFv5z
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHkyFtShUL
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeM58JgFeNL
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCaY3eGJ4sD
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnSW0idAP38
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0xDkVGrobA
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkuOqRlnVXb
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuzFx9xR09f
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTBXZhu5HBA
他百思不得其解。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXYngVogX5k
再聲輕嘆。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTixI3ydk7
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEwvvdAmuOa
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtEXmjiIB36
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKpTvqbjCq
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtLuRp8S6Vp
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsYElF0zAVI
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHbjHuw9MPk
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zMN8KnSkN
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwBiML7lFTC
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvLLZFa9E0B
緣起緣滅，不由自主。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUBus8I0Rz7
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQB0YpKlOC
既要緣滅，何必緣起？327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDWWk8VRgzW
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgXbWhJTfx
他百思不得其解。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPMx6ua2w3t
輕嘆有三。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs9kcs5FtoM
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdSa9veJQCR
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡawm1Cv1qRF
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06FnSIvLoO
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVXasSiJk6U
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVH9yeHfc1
鬱悶。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfvtSS1bFHH
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigi2Uh1Q8R
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3jL8g1iGMY
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTf8SAPRocO
去抱！去奪！327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLETSquj0jr
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0fnFjxfrNN
抱甚麼？腿已不在。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKo8DQ3L9As
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8p2wlkYtb
奪甚麼？球已不在。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbrTUvNmzs6
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1u4Grt4uZk
為何不在？為何統統不在？327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvq8pbuHkAv
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7df9pSPfaF
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqDxYLU8cu
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj8DMxkj8ug
停下來！327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqB1vMt5Lw
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtGRNP9JPkQ
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeSfNNYdiHW
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJMM4mkgOP
慢下來！327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL7hEuJUa1Q
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPc2Og5fCyK
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6SXC1u419
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDvuWSdkBD
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡndNvJCBXbe
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzYiz7V3wWG
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLVNWa8RPBm
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSx4LjSf1r9
昔日的他，今日的孫。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKXO4D39ok
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFjgN4fIXJy
永劫，輪迴。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ47eVZLY3Dq
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5TCm9QbopG
不敢思，不求解。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg51hDL5FnN
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtMe6y4M4Md
嘆，嘆，嘆。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7KvZXTvJHz
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA7woGH23BA
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNXqBSb3GN
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFV7hNt6hR8
他搖頭。327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn0fqlyEBBc
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNMBHz9A6iG
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡceg34OGW1p
327Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqoGGWBd3OS
