這種劇情發展怎麼跟日本毒撚動漫十分相似，突然有個陌生女子在家中出現，然後同居。這種既異想天開又陳腔濫調的劇情，連我在講故台看到都會唾棄。若是毒撚甚至是一般男生絕對會點首答允，這樁美事發生十個男生九個都嚮往，剩下一個應該是同性戀。不好意思，我是第十一個。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAccBUJ5q50
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkE51gtM7Y1
作為一名A0毒撚當然想盡快交女朋友擺脫這個稱號，但論到同居我絕不同意。先撇開她是一個不知從何而來的陌生人，與女生同居這種事沒你想像中那麼美好。為何我知道?全因我之前與家姐同住十幾年，徹底了解與女生這種生物在同一屋簷下是甚麼狀況。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bH5dqf0GL
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSp9zTswYOB
女生與你老媽不同，她們不是照顧你忍讓你的角色，早上搶洗手間，晚上搶電視，半夜在床上與男朋友講電話使你無法入睡，還沒算上其他破壞形象的行為。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqYiEM9Gfi
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1zgp6foDcm
可能你會說家姐是有血緣關係無法與其他女生相提並論，起初我也是這樣以為，但實際例子往往是最好的論證。有一年暑假，家姐的同學來了我家住了幾星期。家姐的同學長得非常可愛，但這個印象僅維持了幾天，往後的日子仿如多了另一位家姐一樣，我平日遇到的痛苦乘以雙倍。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXJVxuQMCYn
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4suJMuJstj
因此我對與女生同居一事只有一個看法，女生的形象率先崩壞，然後你的生活亦隨之崩壞。可能是我太偏激，抑或是我對上述女生本身沒有多餘的遐想。即使今天要與我同居的女生是岑月寧，我還是會拒絕，我怕會破壞她在我心目中的形象。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsviiTM0oaF
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoqNxHSepD7
「你傻架?你話係度住我就會俾你住架啦?就算我肯，我老母都唔肯啦。」我將老媽二字搬出來。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfj8EhYT9o
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ59TY9IX8mP
「即係你阿媽肯俾我係度住，你就肯?」她抓我說話的漏洞。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBkmODcsWPC
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYR0kOoq68z
我心裡想著老媽怎麼可能答允，我就放長雙眼看她怎麼垂頭喪氣的離開。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8iPLelw6M
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3bZsnqep0D
「睇下我老母點應你囉。」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkg5NXHDqnO
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8i00SgjNhJ
我跟她說老媽在上班，要十二點才回來，讓她在客廳等。我趕緊換回衣服，然後自顧的走到廚房從櫃中拿出杯麵，打開杯麵提起熱水壺倒水進去。我提著杯麵進房間，打算邊吃邊看伍公子的公子玩walking dead。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5c9Ii7U92U
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCgMGHAhts
想不到她跟著我進房間，我回頭望向她，只見她望著我手上的杯麵嚥口水…197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlv0gqaSMXP
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlDSrFb7atl
「又點啊?想食啊?」我問。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuRSV6kFjYg
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5u7ahRbZIw
她按著肚輕輕點頭。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnmu1LzVEO7
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDu9BQWkNQi
「又話自己係仙子，乜仙子會肚餓架咩?」我嘲諷著說。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXLgzZNZsD
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBstm3dmqet
「唔食咪唔食囉，好叻咩!」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡob6RZZxTiE
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoJPexx3oyQ
想不到她是如此倔強，我沒理會她繼續享用杯麵及公子玩。吃完後打算扔垃圾走出房間時，發現她坐在沙發一邊按著肚一邊怒視著我。她的眼神兇悍得猶如我是她仇人一樣，我怕了她，把垃圾扔掉後，便從櫃子裡拿出另一個杯麵，還注滿熱水送到她面前。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvk15Z2joko
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG3wlrvri10
「嗱，食啦，廢事你好似隻餓鬼咁啤實我。」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs39PyMjy4O
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaM4NIChSCU
「邊個話我肚餓。」她口嫌體正直，雙手已經捧著杯麵。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVMKN4bs9A
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8XdSDjz5Qq
看著她這種反差意外地帶點可愛。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH6KxAnSBUH
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXpa2OdrQxX
她打開杯麵用鼻吸了一口問:197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiA8ZLY6Bur
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf33mLrDRCT
「辣架?」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW1KneoAWY2
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjDZk8I9ll
我家的杯麵一向由我包辦，而我只會吃合味道的香辣海鮮味，要在我家找到別的口味是不可能的。我看她神情驟變便說:197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2sceg5fMY9
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtiNELiVsse
「唔食得辣啊?咁唔好食囉。」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPYrdZbh9ho
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfYp9ANbhlm
她聽到後反而大口的把麵條吸入，看她吃得滿頭大汗就覺得有點好笑。這種杯麵的辣連譚仔十小辣都不如，居然有人會吃到出汗。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNOPmRWl7F
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1T6fY7Cm5
我看她雙唇變得紅彤微腫，便倒了杯水給她，她接過水杯說:197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqwOX4IC3w
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xKFMzVQQP
「唔該。」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFjefUdDmI
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl68QoyhGjd
「唔駛，我唔該你就真，俾我發現原來有人咁渣，連合味道嘅辣都頂唔住。」我笑著說。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyfLmHVUeCN
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCL0cOwqxRQ
「好好笑咩!?」她突然怒吼。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsfukQfj3d5
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIfEG1Pgw74
我被她的神情嚇一跳，收起了嬉笑的嘴臉…197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTGiGxCQ79
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHhPiiM1ath
「你咁嘅態度對女仔，睇死你一定冇女朋友啦。」她噴出一句。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblyJsLyIlQ
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCx3jIPKZWs
她這一句完全是我的致命傷，我不知如何反駁。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqF7wKoA7c
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpRgj8VUZMF
「唔出聲即係我講中啦。」她接連的攻勢讓我快招架不住。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7R1CAJlw0V
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrJuQVMzzxW
被她說穿事實，我無法裝腔作勢…197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡScVQpWll0j
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLbAn0ysp1
「係啦係啦，你啱晒啦得未，我無拍過拖就係原罪，你地有拖拍嘅咪即管笑囉!」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVN9gcV06Y
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpnY8dZFVy8
我突然想起今早韓信他們也攻擊我這一點，說完我垂頭回到房間裡再沒跟她講話。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgsJJLsqAWW
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡebY1s8ndbl
尷尬的氣氛維持良久，直到聽到開門聲，老媽終於回來…197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzC5NwGI5EF
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxa8JbjGgJs
老媽回來便看到那位女生，問我:197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjNI8Y2DAEl
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyBgLOyQT3E
「阿仔，呢位邊個嚟?」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe9wUc6DhSy
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAsLpA6GBHW
「你問我?你不如問下你帶返嚟個茶…」我說到一半嘴巴一隻手被捂著。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmwbohMDxwl
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfBrkdS4jcd
是她阻止了我，然後她把我老媽拉到廚房小聲的密談，我站在客廳聽不到對話內容。片刻後她們出來，我老媽對著我說:197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dHwNkmAWU
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY2eAR2xy0G
「仔，之後曦…啊唔係，呢位茶小姐會係度住一排。」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsuERRlnFpa
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMromq708l9
WTF!?老媽你搞甚麼?居然會讓她住下來?197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxByZ3f2qp4
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZDj3ZVhO5r
「吓!?點解啊?三唔識七點解要俾佢住?邊有咁多地方俾佢瞓?」我愕然的問。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ouuPNH58x
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTAXJCOgvpP
「你咪理咁多啦，同埋你執返上格床啲野佢瞓返你家姐張床咪得囉。」老媽四兩撥千斤的化解我的問題。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyXbw4m9X7M
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOqynb40Ly
現在同居還不夠，還要同房是嗎?我完全無法接受，顯然我的抗議無法撼動我老媽，我便抓了那女生到一旁…197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFZUJwqEXs
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNnu2g57uy
「喂!你好講做左啲咩搞到我老母咁順攤?」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG2fPPz3gyL
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnyg5oGbftI
「我都話左我係茶碗仙子，呢啲野難唔到我，係你唔信我咋嘛。」她囂張的道。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhz9Zobbyos
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddf3nVN5wj
「仲有我唔係叫喂，叫我做茶小姐!」她接著說。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSI2Os6msiw
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiCpeZlngTa
「茶你老…」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdvnVL9aqX5
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWsidXj1f5
「阿仔，今晚你瞓廳啦，俾人地女仔瞓房啊，聽日返嚟要執好上格床啊。」老媽打斷我的同時下了不人道的命令。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWINRJ6gba2
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtglHnCVFtg
我不解為何要讓出我的床，怎麼說都應該是她睡在客廳吧…197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOd9llwlNB
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGB5nJL5Vnl
「瞓廳啦你。」她擺出欠打的表情說。197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡILLBubRaXt
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXdqKazEZ3V
「你都痴線，我今晚老虎蟹都瞓房。」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl8C2MmsNH0
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdDxP3yHbUQ
我絕不退讓，可是強硬姿態敵不過她下一句…197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oFqNeVsJw
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WN5su6Hxz
「今晚想同我同床瞓啊?咸濕仔…」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFeY8xs2CD
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVJZE13nSL
我不知道她是故意挑逗還是隨口說，換著別人恐怕早就把她吃掉，可是我在這方面是個廢物，面對這種事情就當機不懂反應，她看我呆掉便說:197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnaIulgHnDc
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1brXJSfJKo
「你唔係真係想啊嘛?發夢啦你，同我死出廳瞓!」197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYM017dkCx9
197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2GMjndY0dR
砰!房門大力關上，就這樣我與我的床相隔一道門，只好認命的睡在沙發。唉，我究竟做錯了甚麼落得如此下場，果然與女生同居就不會有好日子過…197Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8KOVnOwYfk
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