這種劇情發展怎麼跟日本毒撚動漫十分相似，突然有個陌生女子在家中出現，然後同居。這種既異想天開又陳腔濫調的劇情，連我在講故台看到都會唾棄。若是毒撚甚至是一般男生絕對會點首答允，這樁美事發生十個男生九個都嚮往，剩下一個應該是同性戀。不好意思，我是第十一個。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJsniRNd5y
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作為一名A0毒撚當然想盡快交女朋友擺脫這個稱號，但論到同居我絕不同意。先撇開她是一個不知從何而來的陌生人，與女生同居這種事沒你想像中那麼美好。為何我知道?全因我之前與家姐同住十幾年，徹底了解與女生這種生物在同一屋簷下是甚麼狀況。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1IUT7ezHrg
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkbP6x5YFmr
女生與你老媽不同，她們不是照顧你忍讓你的角色，早上搶洗手間，晚上搶電視，半夜在床上與男朋友講電話使你無法入睡，還沒算上其他破壞形象的行為。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1gwqGR8Vc3
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHdx0ZWDQZF
可能你會說家姐是有血緣關係無法與其他女生相提並論，起初我也是這樣以為，但實際例子往往是最好的論證。有一年暑假，家姐的同學來了我家住了幾星期。家姐的同學長得非常可愛，但這個印象僅維持了幾天，往後的日子仿如多了另一位家姐一樣，我平日遇到的痛苦乘以雙倍。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiLvPGyBxZ0
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7i7Zy6IZyJ
因此我對與女生同居一事只有一個看法，女生的形象率先崩壞，然後你的生活亦隨之崩壞。可能是我太偏激，抑或是我對上述女生本身沒有多餘的遐想。即使今天要與我同居的女生是岑月寧，我還是會拒絕，我怕會破壞她在我心目中的形象。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW5EyPcCue3
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「你傻架?你話係度住我就會俾你住架啦?就算我肯，我老母都唔肯啦。」我將老媽二字搬出來。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbONAbo84J5
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaO7jbYqMw2
「即係你阿媽肯俾我係度住，你就肯?」她抓我說話的漏洞。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOvGlg5S65I
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我心裡想著老媽怎麼可能答允，我就放長雙眼看她怎麼垂頭喪氣的離開。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuHpbA0NIE9
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「睇下我老母點應你囉。」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa9uIsltFWf
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLoKiZUIfVW
我跟她說老媽在上班，要十二點才回來，讓她在客廳等。我趕緊換回衣服，然後自顧的走到廚房從櫃中拿出杯麵，打開杯麵提起熱水壺倒水進去。我提著杯麵進房間，打算邊吃邊看伍公子的公子玩walking dead。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS9QxhYN1Jz
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想不到她跟著我進房間，我回頭望向她，只見她望著我手上的杯麵嚥口水…150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR7rWgId9DU
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「又點啊?想食啊?」我問。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuni62bBp2V
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她按著肚輕輕點頭。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4ngZdWVYL
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV9jOEXD2MA
「又話自己係仙子，乜仙子會肚餓架咩?」我嘲諷著說。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwibBgLqWBJ
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH74hEqKd6K
「唔食咪唔食囉，好叻咩!」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9606BBolK
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlC6Xv8yQch
想不到她是如此倔強，我沒理會她繼續享用杯麵及公子玩。吃完後打算扔垃圾走出房間時，發現她坐在沙發一邊按著肚一邊怒視著我。她的眼神兇悍得猶如我是她仇人一樣，我怕了她，把垃圾扔掉後，便從櫃子裡拿出另一個杯麵，還注滿熱水送到她面前。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg7qYnXnKhS
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm4Is1zwp7W
「嗱，食啦，廢事你好似隻餓鬼咁啤實我。」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBCZYFzeZug
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡphwBNT4jaJ
「邊個話我肚餓。」她口嫌體正直，雙手已經捧著杯麵。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSjaKn1sVVm
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjK0x5AohqN
看著她這種反差意外地帶點可愛。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXGbRmKR5XK
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCC5L4ZcPqc
她打開杯麵用鼻吸了一口問:150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP64m4bqhyE
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「辣架?」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZnf1gXSFc
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我家的杯麵一向由我包辦，而我只會吃合味道的香辣海鮮味，要在我家找到別的口味是不可能的。我看她神情驟變便說:150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpc6m7fbu9H
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51ukCjDddH
「唔食得辣啊?咁唔好食囉。」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67IUF4DmL8
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ5BTQL7Ce4
她聽到後反而大口的把麵條吸入，看她吃得滿頭大汗就覺得有點好笑。這種杯麵的辣連譚仔十小辣都不如，居然有人會吃到出汗。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqdpDLwjZ9X
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqA4Cr9rIPP
我看她雙唇變得紅彤微腫，便倒了杯水給她，她接過水杯說:150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDJ06USUpgg
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「唔該。」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL0ANTWZraR
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「唔駛，我唔該你就真，俾我發現原來有人咁渣，連合味道嘅辣都頂唔住。」我笑著說。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdY2ooeSiDr
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「好好笑咩!?」她突然怒吼。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx35FKfdnyy
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6fd3NciLar
我被她的神情嚇一跳，收起了嬉笑的嘴臉…150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtdvWFVNTbn
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4lcqrcAQXs
「你咁嘅態度對女仔，睇死你一定冇女朋友啦。」她噴出一句。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgdyfmqNHc
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她這一句完全是我的致命傷，我不知如何反駁。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ABZ5ODs4L
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdypAwUNusr
「唔出聲即係我講中啦。」她接連的攻勢讓我快招架不住。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh75htlAD2y
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被她說穿事實，我無法裝腔作勢…150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV7SHmSHKiz
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7JWInfYVCb
「係啦係啦，你啱晒啦得未，我無拍過拖就係原罪，你地有拖拍嘅咪即管笑囉!」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWv3tAW0uSY
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQpFjHqahn
我突然想起今早韓信他們也攻擊我這一點，說完我垂頭回到房間裡再沒跟她講話。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4aTZB6LIR
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRtnYI9k3it
尷尬的氣氛維持良久，直到聽到開門聲，老媽終於回來…150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhDIX6jsz9G
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1j3nB4tdb
老媽回來便看到那位女生，問我:150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuyP5iquQWg
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNAw7kku2vr
「阿仔，呢位邊個嚟?」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bJqsVRpEY
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCDaeDIH39H
「你問我?你不如問下你帶返嚟個茶…」我說到一半嘴巴一隻手被捂著。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ75LMX2sKgR
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是她阻止了我，然後她把我老媽拉到廚房小聲的密談，我站在客廳聽不到對話內容。片刻後她們出來，我老媽對著我說:150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1U17Ut8BP
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjddIhITvQY
「仔，之後曦…啊唔係，呢位茶小姐會係度住一排。」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttXcKswTKO
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7WN77gdD8
WTF!?老媽你搞甚麼?居然會讓她住下來?150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHxsKmqKIZh
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJEZp8B1WDw
「吓!?點解啊?三唔識七點解要俾佢住?邊有咁多地方俾佢瞓?」我愕然的問。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡic6vnZcQIS
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbcfp2bnugK
「你咪理咁多啦，同埋你執返上格床啲野佢瞓返你家姐張床咪得囉。」老媽四兩撥千斤的化解我的問題。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY7THUWUWV2
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWGm12rRD8
現在同居還不夠，還要同房是嗎?我完全無法接受，顯然我的抗議無法撼動我老媽，我便抓了那女生到一旁…150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvUtVM8EOAL
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGd8SDlMzm1
「喂!你好講做左啲咩搞到我老母咁順攤?」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6DoYv1SnJU
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSj50stFxTN
「我都話左我係茶碗仙子，呢啲野難唔到我，係你唔信我咋嘛。」她囂張的道。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3yyYb84IRy
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ81TwfArEOT
「仲有我唔係叫喂，叫我做茶小姐!」她接著說。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvZprfaBJ2
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa3S2MwWVUo
「茶你老…」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5eVl2V9VWE
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「阿仔，今晚你瞓廳啦，俾人地女仔瞓房啊，聽日返嚟要執好上格床啊。」老媽打斷我的同時下了不人道的命令。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLpwQmB71lp
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWS21ETHZCH
我不解為何要讓出我的床，怎麼說都應該是她睡在客廳吧…150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorbEXVSX98
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvrLHY1ECEa
「瞓廳啦你。」她擺出欠打的表情說。150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIkmKAbRMS4
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUosLUPrwDx
「你都痴線，我今晚老虎蟹都瞓房。」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOVFzTJjHI
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ30OMe0F36A
我絕不退讓，可是強硬姿態敵不過她下一句…150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCn5GCPxyRy
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCofXr2nsAm
「今晚想同我同床瞓啊?咸濕仔…」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUM4I5IYTiG
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzUdJOtNqT
我不知道她是故意挑逗還是隨口說，換著別人恐怕早就把她吃掉，可是我在這方面是個廢物，面對這種事情就當機不懂反應，她看我呆掉便說:150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDEm4TQhJJS
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHovdrTMlJ
「你唔係真係想啊嘛?發夢啦你，同我死出廳瞓!」150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡULOMLynJfb
150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKG7p1cYTKU
砰!房門大力關上，就這樣我與我的床相隔一道門，只好認命的睡在沙發。唉，我究竟做錯了甚麼落得如此下場，果然與女生同居就不會有好日子過…150Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtyB4CfW5Q
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