這種劇情發展怎麼跟日本毒撚動漫十分相似，突然有個陌生女子在家中出現，然後同居。這種既異想天開又陳腔濫調的劇情，連我在講故台看到都會唾棄。若是毒撚甚至是一般男生絕對會點首答允，這樁美事發生十個男生九個都嚮往，剩下一個應該是同性戀。不好意思，我是第十一個。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDA8aZjMJy
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2nHhtPB2CW
作為一名A0毒撚當然想盡快交女朋友擺脫這個稱號，但論到同居我絕不同意。先撇開她是一個不知從何而來的陌生人，與女生同居這種事沒你想像中那麼美好。為何我知道?全因我之前與家姐同住十幾年，徹底了解與女生這種生物在同一屋簷下是甚麼狀況。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLObGyCSCER
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0GR2R8Yect
女生與你老媽不同，她們不是照顧你忍讓你的角色，早上搶洗手間，晚上搶電視，半夜在床上與男朋友講電話使你無法入睡，還沒算上其他破壞形象的行為。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡom72Nvn5b7
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6Gfda8Siu
可能你會說家姐是有血緣關係無法與其他女生相提並論，起初我也是這樣以為，但實際例子往往是最好的論證。有一年暑假，家姐的同學來了我家住了幾星期。家姐的同學長得非常可愛，但這個印象僅維持了幾天，往後的日子仿如多了另一位家姐一樣，我平日遇到的痛苦乘以雙倍。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZc6Su0UEKL
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuWgFyWNtKF
因此我對與女生同居一事只有一個看法，女生的形象率先崩壞，然後你的生活亦隨之崩壞。可能是我太偏激，抑或是我對上述女生本身沒有多餘的遐想。即使今天要與我同居的女生是岑月寧，我還是會拒絕，我怕會破壞她在我心目中的形象。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAHPut1nRY
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSq1oPW2o6c
「你傻架?你話係度住我就會俾你住架啦?就算我肯，我老母都唔肯啦。」我將老媽二字搬出來。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡujtH3kUOYJ
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7G7boWJFgv
「即係你阿媽肯俾我係度住，你就肯?」她抓我說話的漏洞。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFF5aAl8IMh
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1eS4GXoHZ
我心裡想著老媽怎麼可能答允，我就放長雙眼看她怎麼垂頭喪氣的離開。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaaYS9PIsM
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8R6smWPfrO
「睇下我老母點應你囉。」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2DEjPomEwr
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNEoGj8Obfq
我跟她說老媽在上班，要十二點才回來，讓她在客廳等。我趕緊換回衣服，然後自顧的走到廚房從櫃中拿出杯麵，打開杯麵提起熱水壺倒水進去。我提著杯麵進房間，打算邊吃邊看伍公子的公子玩walking dead。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskfUmosfqY
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDHWHC7T96c
想不到她跟著我進房間，我回頭望向她，只見她望著我手上的杯麵嚥口水…178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKHL5oZeE76
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzqQkL17pf1
「又點啊?想食啊?」我問。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4OXRGGyee4
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXPTWY8pQRW
她按著肚輕輕點頭。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLU8bEXbWnf
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheBJVYbpMx
「又話自己係仙子，乜仙子會肚餓架咩?」我嘲諷著說。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuanHiUhyy
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5uuFCHqqP
「唔食咪唔食囉，好叻咩!」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIh6l9Lm8q5
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvm79WxslWE
想不到她是如此倔強，我沒理會她繼續享用杯麵及公子玩。吃完後打算扔垃圾走出房間時，發現她坐在沙發一邊按著肚一邊怒視著我。她的眼神兇悍得猶如我是她仇人一樣，我怕了她，把垃圾扔掉後，便從櫃子裡拿出另一個杯麵，還注滿熱水送到她面前。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEnfbur3uc
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGymTxKAiv
「嗱，食啦，廢事你好似隻餓鬼咁啤實我。」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYkipKNyBXt
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfo1egnE9I
「邊個話我肚餓。」她口嫌體正直，雙手已經捧著杯麵。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZYG5pLpvk
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY8co6vgvl0
看著她這種反差意外地帶點可愛。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuQTDXAsYkj
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN81UBKEY6g
她打開杯麵用鼻吸了一口問:178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeD9l4Grfvq
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzN6YklJTpK
「辣架?」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi7jAzq8rG7
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRpbtRo2uuS
我家的杯麵一向由我包辦，而我只會吃合味道的香辣海鮮味，要在我家找到別的口味是不可能的。我看她神情驟變便說:178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBx7yPxhZHN
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHNBu6GmK4B
「唔食得辣啊?咁唔好食囉。」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cGTPfkljX
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDCZkyuDYd
她聽到後反而大口的把麵條吸入，看她吃得滿頭大汗就覺得有點好笑。這種杯麵的辣連譚仔十小辣都不如，居然有人會吃到出汗。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4boVwvCXOq
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKPzmTmHjZJ
我看她雙唇變得紅彤微腫，便倒了杯水給她，她接過水杯說:178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzP4N3uvrz7
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXdBCCHKhqo
「唔該。」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFuFFntc6aD
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUyjDgZeo7c
「唔駛，我唔該你就真，俾我發現原來有人咁渣，連合味道嘅辣都頂唔住。」我笑著說。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAi6pIqrlgR
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0CBgO81bu
「好好笑咩!?」她突然怒吼。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnqs8B0YDGb
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1SiwE1aqiW
我被她的神情嚇一跳，收起了嬉笑的嘴臉…178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc3cq6oNAFW
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUpZsQI5vPx
「你咁嘅態度對女仔，睇死你一定冇女朋友啦。」她噴出一句。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsk5uYsqihU
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡegiA6vSjtY
她這一句完全是我的致命傷，我不知如何反駁。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqG8tKyTgm0
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhK7xXG1Gju
「唔出聲即係我講中啦。」她接連的攻勢讓我快招架不住。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdvj69pXtB
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡld58RQZD7l
被她說穿事實，我無法裝腔作勢…178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4HpSGVXsQ
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1AZe1eQxdo
「係啦係啦，你啱晒啦得未，我無拍過拖就係原罪，你地有拖拍嘅咪即管笑囉!」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjwfnLkbRJ
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVYPsxjWTC
我突然想起今早韓信他們也攻擊我這一點，說完我垂頭回到房間裡再沒跟她講話。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHtK7Z7CCS
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM7SuPL3zdS
尷尬的氣氛維持良久，直到聽到開門聲，老媽終於回來…178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQeJYXwRHW
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMBobmzJL4
老媽回來便看到那位女生，問我:178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxa5LolKKe8
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFg9UcVja4k
「阿仔，呢位邊個嚟?」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8xczcIMb8k
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKjc2JXIRQb
「你問我?你不如問下你帶返嚟個茶…」我說到一半嘴巴一隻手被捂著。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCHqNIQBIFb
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWctvfvMFs
是她阻止了我，然後她把我老媽拉到廚房小聲的密談，我站在客廳聽不到對話內容。片刻後她們出來，我老媽對著我說:178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx45cuqOmSV
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEB0tIEHZvd
「仔，之後曦…啊唔係，呢位茶小姐會係度住一排。」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Q0i9ueU5r
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1tKRQ7zrTw
WTF!?老媽你搞甚麼?居然會讓她住下來?178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡti2OMBj9oH
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk6UNCIOUWO
「吓!?點解啊?三唔識七點解要俾佢住?邊有咁多地方俾佢瞓?」我愕然的問。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdNGOmUNpo7
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxZebMEUel
「你咪理咁多啦，同埋你執返上格床啲野佢瞓返你家姐張床咪得囉。」老媽四兩撥千斤的化解我的問題。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWoM0wTbDCE
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡshmsLESfHs
現在同居還不夠，還要同房是嗎?我完全無法接受，顯然我的抗議無法撼動我老媽，我便抓了那女生到一旁…178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQvneSk8Ce
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL17jKWO1kq
「喂!你好講做左啲咩搞到我老母咁順攤?」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmRkOw9nFXu
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgsppZ4czk
「我都話左我係茶碗仙子，呢啲野難唔到我，係你唔信我咋嘛。」她囂張的道。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTWlOM8iw9h
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJ5kGTFTJr
「仲有我唔係叫喂，叫我做茶小姐!」她接著說。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg7Fs0RzgsF
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwesRkm84XA
「茶你老…」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUgUSk1nb8a
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Ih420f1oU
「阿仔，今晚你瞓廳啦，俾人地女仔瞓房啊，聽日返嚟要執好上格床啊。」老媽打斷我的同時下了不人道的命令。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZzZrgg7pr
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoBUd7DqFR8
我不解為何要讓出我的床，怎麼說都應該是她睡在客廳吧…178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQZDEAki9d
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdY1vl39VM
「瞓廳啦你。」她擺出欠打的表情說。178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPhkMKuxONl
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiKRQhGsuH4
「你都痴線，我今晚老虎蟹都瞓房。」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7a8PyqcUi5
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBr2R2iaT3C
我絕不退讓，可是強硬姿態敵不過她下一句…178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFSMW6MEA9W
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPDbUHkcMN
「今晚想同我同床瞓啊?咸濕仔…」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwpXnp0zToU
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgcuLJk5lk7
我不知道她是故意挑逗還是隨口說，換著別人恐怕早就把她吃掉，可是我在這方面是個廢物，面對這種事情就當機不懂反應，她看我呆掉便說:178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTiEgQlozqk
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHb2EE432lK
「你唔係真係想啊嘛?發夢啦你，同我死出廳瞓!」178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Zxjyz8ZT1
178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdVwbqqfagz
砰!房門大力關上，就這樣我與我的床相隔一道門，只好認命的睡在沙發。唉，我究竟做錯了甚麼落得如此下場，果然與女生同居就不會有好日子過…178Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZtJcvIzBzS
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