Hi everyone! Here is my story. I would like to get a review on it. It majority of the people says it is good I'll continue it or else I'll drop it.
Earth is the only planet in our solar system where life exists. There are many parallel universes which are yet to be explored. This story is about one of our parallel universes where there is a planet named AIDNIA.
Unlike Earth the people living there had powers which they believed is the gift of nature. The five basic and important powers were that of water, fire, land, air and sky. Only a very few people possessed any different powers like that of speaking to animals and plants, healing the wounds of body and mind. It was considered as a precious gift of nature. The magic became a part of their life only when the nature unlocked the magic within them.
No one knows what powers they’ll possess until their age of twenty. The planet was divided into four kingdoms. Aazhi desha, Surya desha, Vaayu desha and Achaala desha. They were named after the powers wielded by their rulers at the starting of their formation.
1. AAZHI DESHA (The Kingdom Of Ocean)
Aazhi desha was ruled by king Varuna. He was a great warrior and a generous king. He had a wife Gayatri and two children...
“I’m Shri. I’m good at speech” said Shri with a smile over her face which seemed more like that out of courtesy. She avoided flinching as Saanvi’s blow hit her below the table. Shri sat down without arousing suspicion from the teacher. She was the last one to introduce herself to their new class teacher.
“That was a good one” murmured Kanda “Are you going to take revenge? Everyone is thinking you are a good girl but only I know you” he said and suppressed a grin.
“It is good to see you people” said the teacher. Her voice was smooth and firm. “I’ll soon get acquainted with you guys. I’m sure you’ll find the subject much easier than expected.” Her tone was full of assurance as her gleaming eyes convinced everyone to believe every word of hers. She left the class as someone summoned her for a meeting.
“What are your plans for the weekend?” asked Amrit.
“Nothing, would you guys like to join us?” asked Kanda his voice reflected his eagerness. Kanda and Shri were siblings. Since Kanda is just a year older than Shri their parents admitted them together in school. Shri and Saanvi were of the same age while Kanda and Amrit were a year older than them.
“Ofcourse. We shall meet there by 9am. The person who comes at last should prepare the coffee. Deal?” Saanvi’s tone of excitement matched with the glow in her face.
The next day Kanda and Shri were quick enough to get ready before the time and Amrit came before Saanvi. He wore a navy blue shirt with the sleeves rolled up with a black watch.
“ Hi Kanda.” He told with a bright smile.
“Yes only he will be visible” snapped Shri
“I’m very sorry Ms.Hermoine. My bad that I didn’t greet you.”
“ Sorry for being late. And you, if she is Hermoine then who am I” scoffed Saanvi.
“Lu...” stretched Kanda.
“Luna Lovegood?” she asked.
“She is much better than you. I was about to say Lunatic” Everyone laughed as she sent a gentle blow over his abdomen. Everyone teased her for being late. She took careful steps to avoid stepping over her long red skirt which was perfect for her yellow top. Her glass bangles clinked along her every movement.
“I wish to tell something to you” hesitated Shri
“Go on” cleared Saanvi.
“I’ve started to write something. A story of some kind of parallel universe... I don’t know how to create the villain. Could you guys help me do it? I want some merciless and strong villain” she asked with a bit of hesitation and was doubtful about the responses.
“Is this the matter?” sighed Kanda.
Saanvi got the note book from Shri and read out what had been written.
“You haven’t even completed the first chapter” asked Amrit.
“Explain one of your lead characters. If it is satisfying then we all shall go to the library and get some ideas from a variety of stories” said Saanvi.
Shri cleared her throat. Her smooth voice spread over them like an enchantment. “Mmm... Her skin was in the colour of warm beige which contrasted with her pitch black hair that looked as if inherited from the night itself. The diamonds in her headdress glimmered like stars over her black hair. Her eyebrows arched like two hills above her almond eyes which were of the darkest amber one can ever get to see. Her nose emerged like a valley between her brows and was slender. Her lips were like rose petals. A perfect jaw line and neck made her alluring. Her collar bones resembled two adjacently placed chopsticks. Her eyes glistened with her knowledge. Her hands wielded swords as if they are just an extension of her hand.”
“Wow!” exclaimed Saanvi.
“I think we shall move now” told Kanda with a simple smile.
They went in their cycles to the city library and parked their cycles uniformly. As they went inside Saanvi went to the visitor’s diary and entered everyone’s name as they went inside.
“Do you have your membership card?” asked Kanda for which Amrit teased “I am your friend I know that you would never ever take your membership card along with you. It’s ok. Since you are my friend I’m allowing you to use mine”
“Thanks buddy” Kanda replied mockingly.
Everyone went in different ways and tried to find some good books. Shri gently caressed the spines of the books. Suddenly she spotted something shimmering. She eagerly took out that book and found a key chain in it. As the others called her she took that key chain and strode towards the entrance.
“Didn’t you take any?” asked Amrit for which she answered with a nod and took out that keychain from her pocket.
It looked like a wand with a gleaming purple crystal on its head. The wood of the wand was similar to that of mahogany and the crystal was something which made everyone fix their eyes upon for a few seconds. They decided to leave and everyone was silent. While on their way back Kanda went in a different way to buy ice creams while the three cycled back to Shri’s home.
As approved earlier Saanvi went to the kitchen to make coffee for everyone. Amrit looked at Shri and was surprised that she was completely lost in her thoughts. He hesitated to disturb her. Suddenly her thought as well as the silence of the room broke as Kanda and Saanvi entered.
They had their cold coffees with vanilla ice cream and started to chat about their school. Suddenly Amrit turned to Shri and asked her about the genre of her story.
“Oh that. I’ve planned it to be a fantasy thriller with a touch of adventure and... ancient culture and mythologies”
“Where did you keep that key chain Shri?”
“Inside my book” replied Shri as she went towards her table and took out the key chain from her notebook. She observed the elegant curves of the wand and smoothly caressed the crystal.
* * *
Shri woke up with a sudden jerk and accidentally pushed a flower vase which broke with a thud. She heard footsteps and two maids came running into the room and bowed her. Before she could make sense of her situation an attendant cleaned the broken pieces.
“Your highness, are you all right do you want anything?” asked an attendant.
“No, you may take your leave” she replied without understanding anything.
Why is she calling me Highness? Where am I? Why did I reply? Is this a dream?
She went to see herself in the mirror. She was wearing a crimson saree. Its draping style was much familiar. The fleets fell loosely on her back and reached below her knees. She wore an orange blouse above which her saree was draped and pinned on her left shoulder. Her hairstyle was a different one from her usuals. Half of her front hair was gathered and tied into a bun and the rest behind fell loose on her back.
Her ornaments gleamed against her crimson silk saree. A necklace with rubies matched her saree’s colour and the embroidery on her saree was elegant with flowers and plants. Her hair was adorned with gold and silver. Her golden hairpin shone with its vivid colours and two pearls hung from it like droplets of moonlight. Her earrings were made of gold and its ruby stones matched her necklace.
An urge gripped her heart to know more about that place and an unknown happiness crept inside her which was soon followed by a fear. She thought of the things that happened. She could only remember till the part where she caressed the crystal. She looked around her room. A sword laid in a corner along with a bow some arrows and daggers. She took a dagger and tucked it in her waist beneath her saree.
“Your highness, the Crown Prince came to see you” announced a girl and she soon disappeared out into the corridor and a man strode into her room with familiar features. A sign of relief spread over her face. He came towards her and patted her head gently.
“Thank god Kanda. I was afraid” she told in a low voice and recoiled as the sound of anklets grew louder. Saanvi rushed to the entrance and was relieved to see them both. She went running and hugged Shri with her eyes full of tears.
“Where are we?” she asked.
“We’ll find it out” replied Kanda in a firm voice.
He them summoned a maid who came in and bowed to them. Shri asked her to lead them to the library for which the maid replied politely and asked them to follow. They went through a long corridor with tall pillars. The tiles were painted with vivid aquatic creatures. The pillars were decorated with strands of pearls which hung from them. The walls were painted with an elegant blue colour and the paintings of warriors and ancestors decorated the walls. Soldiers guarded every nook and corner of the palace. Their turquoise armours bore the symbol of the kingdom.
“This way please” gestured the attendant and left them in the library. The library was huge. One of its wall had the map of their kingdom. As the attendant left Shri slowly stalked the rows she pulled out a few books and went to a corner where a table made from teak wood with curved legs and carved flowers along with a cozy teak chair.
“What the hell!” she murmured after a couple of hours.
“ Is there any good news cause I’m also trying to read some but my head is continuously aching but you are sincerely reading it” a silver of tiredness was there in Saanvi’s voice.
“Do not panic. We are... inside... my book” she spoke the last two words in a rush.
“What?” murmured Kanda as he stood stupefied.
“Is there any way to go back to reality?” asked Saanvi.
“I don’t know but I do have an idea but I’m not sure” Shri said reluctantly and continued “Maybe when we end this story”
“How are we going to end this story?” asked Saanvi.
“Idiot. You are really a fool. Don’t you remember? We went to the library to find a villain for this story so that she can write an appropriate ending” teased Kanda.
“So the only way is to play our characters correctly” slowly said Shri.
“Won’t our parents search for us?” asked Saanvi.
“What will change if they search us? Do you have the power to return on your will and wish? Or do our parents know that we are inside an unwritten book?” asked Kanda.
“Lets end it as soon as possible” said Shri till that she was calm and composed but a sudden thought made her panic and tensed. As her expression changed Kanda and Saanvi stared at her she spoke with trembling voice “WHERE IS AMRIT?”
* * *
“Where am I?” shouted Amrit.
“Your highness, are you alright?” asked a servant as he ran into the room “I’ll ask the General to meet you” He left the room in urge.
Soon a man who was as tall as him entered the room. His armour gleamed and his features were crafty and defined. His broad shoulders eased at the sight of Amrit and his lips widened into a smile.
“Get ready for your practice” his voice was firm but warm.
“I’m sorry. But I’m unable to remember anything tell me about myself”
“What? Your name is Amrit. You are the Crown Prince of Surya Desha. You are 20 years old...”
“Ok I’ll remember soon. You told something about practice right when is that?”
“Right now”
Amrit came to his senses when General Ajay left his room.
So by any chance am I inside Shri’s book? I wish I’m not alone. What about the other three? Oh! I think I should go now.
He wore a dark blue panchakacham dothi and a kurta and tied a sash around his waist. He folded his full sleeves till his elbow. His sleeves were in sky blue colour with gold elephants embroidered all over them. The part of the garment covering his body was in the clour of dark blue as same as that of his dothi. His sash was in sky blue colour with gold embroidery. He tucked his pouch and a dagger in his sash. He strapped his sword to his side and went out.
He strode in a magnificent corridor. The walls were painted with various shades of red, orange and yellow. The pillars had carved dragons and phoenixes. After crossing several rooms and halls he reached the backyard of the palace where warfare was practiced. As he entered the General cast him a warm glance.
“Are you ready for your test?” he roared.
Amrit’s head nodded in affirmation before he could think.
What am I doing? I had never ever touched a sword before. Oh! Got it.
The fight began. His opponent started to attack. He blocked each blow but did not attack. As the attacks grew faster he started to wield the sword with ease and he attacked his opponent and won in a very little time. As he helped his opponent to get on his feet he realized that the trait of the character remains the same.
Which means I’ll be able to handle the weapons with ease. So the skills possessed by them cannot be changed with respect to their souls.
After a few hours of tiring practice he went to his chamber. He found soft idlis with hot sambar coconut chutney and two small dosas laid for his dinner. With a sigh of relief he ate them all and went near the window. The full moon shone brightly against the dark night. He was tired to go out and explore the place so he fell on his bed and continued to watch the moon. The cool breeze lulled him to sleep despite his thoughts about his friends.
Three months passed like a blink of an eye. By this time the all four were pretty good at warfare. But Amrit never found his other three friends in this time and neither did he dropped the idea of searching them. He spent his free time in exploring the city and his palace. He walked, trekked, rode on horse and elephants. He experienced things which he had never thought of. Even General Ajay became his friend and everything was alright except for the abductions.