Foxxess, Kitara, and Bunnie lounged on a sunny sandy beach, their forms resting underneath the shade of a massive purple umbrella. Kitara wore a black leotard while Foxxess and Bunnie wore contrasting bikinis—the vulpusite chose a deep blue fabric whilst the leporidite preferred her bright red flannel. The trio chose differing methods of relaxation; Kitara had crossed her legs as she closed her eyes, breathing deeply as she attempted to maintain a meditative trance, while Bunnie reclined in a chair weaved from the same wooden fibers as the island trees that waited in the grasslands behind the beach. Foxxess, on the other hand, rested facedown on a towel, her body split halfway between the shade and sunlight, allowing light to illuminate two large humps of flesh and fur.
The three ladies were far from alone; the beach was filled to the brim with laughing, jumping, playing, joyful creatures—and one individual who lay on a couch under the shade of umbrella, sobbing his lungs out as a creature wearing glasses and a labcoat nodded and took notes on a clipboard.
When I say creatures, I cannot know what it brings to mind because I’ve yet to describe their forms. Perhaps you may record your thoughts on paper to test your psychic abilities. If you’ve correctly identified the appearance of these creatures, then you’re truly gifted, or you should spend less time at the farm. That’s right—if the bikini descriptions didn’t alert you already, this chapter is going to be full of horns. Yes, all the creatures walking the beach, including the one sobbing to his therapist, all possessed twin horns—making this a horny chapter. Eh? You didn’t even crack a smile? Learn to lighten up, pal. I bet you’re fun at parties.
A large group of these creatures stood gathered around a net, laughing and shouting as they whacked a volleyball back and forth. The thin layer of splotched white and black fur covering their bodies did little to obscure their incredibly polarized proportions. The males of this species possessed V-shaped bodies packed with swollen muscles like party balloons, their tree-trunk like necks supported by broad shoulders that could easily seat a person on each side. Meanwhile, the females were just the opposite—their bodies were like an upside down V, which is an A, I suppose, and I do indeed give them an A for their outstandingly beautiful appearances—and after A comes B, and these girls all had large Bs on their chests. No, I literally mean flipping a B sideways so that the U-shapes are hanging down and they were huge with a capital H!
Sorry. I’ll try to remain calm when describing the splendid sight I witnessed. Back in my day, I was an esteemed bachelor with a higher body count than Kitara’s kill list, but the same old tricks are playing to my fancy as they always have—you know what? I think I’ll just return to the story.
The three assassins watched the volleyball game with relative disinterest, for their minds attended to other matters.
Bunnie held a cool glass of some sweet fruity concoction in her metallic fingers; she took a sip from a pink straw to bring the delicious liquid up the shaft, past her elegant lips, and down her throat. Her brilliant blue eyes flicked over to Kitara. “How’s your meditation going, Kitara? I’d imagine that it must be pretty hard to do it here with how loud it is.”
Kitara didn’t respond immediately, continuing to breathe deeply with her eyes closed. She cracked her eyes open to meet Bunnie’s with a slight smile. “You’re right. Trying to clear my mind is difficult with all the noise.” She leaned back, scraping a hand through granules of sand. “But even if it was quiet, it would be hard for me not to think about Happy.”
Bunnie narrowed her eyes. “I feel the same way. I can’t stop thinking about her—she truly was like a little sister to me. She was as annoying as hell, but that’s how little sisters are.”
Kitara frowned. “You once had a little sister, didn’t you?”
Bunnie closed her eyes tightly and exhaled.
“I’m sorry I brought it up,” Kitara muttered, looking down.
“No,” Bunnie said, raising a hand, then clenching it into a fist before her face. “No, I should be able to speak about it after all these years.” She forced out a chuckle, then glanced at Kitara with a wry smile. “I don’t want to kill the mood. Let’s enjoy this vacation—we rarely get them.”
“Mmph,” Foxxess mumbled, her eyelids fluttering. “Please ... give me more of your milk!” Drool dripped from the dozing vulpusite’s lips. “So creamy ... so salty!”
Bunnie scowled, then smirked as she flicked out a hand and swatted Foxxess on the bum.
Foxxess released an odd squeal as she bolted awake, sitting up to clasp her stinging bum as she glared at Bunnie. “Hey! Keep your hands to yourself! If you weren’t my best friend, I’d be throwing paws right now!”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Bunnie said insincerely. “You really seemed to be enjoying your dream. I just didn’t want you making a mess of that towel.”
Foxxess gritted her teeth. “Shut up. I was just feeling thirsty and dreamt of drinking milk.”
“Thirsty sounds right,” Bunnie quipped.
“That’s it!” Foxxess snarled, lunging to her feet and throwing herself onto Bunnie. “You had this a long time coming!”
Bunnie’s chair collapsed under the weight of the two struggling girls. They rolled a solid distance across the sand until a clear victor was decided.
Kitara sighed, covering her face with a hand.
Bunnie smiled down at Foxxess, pinning the vulpusite’s wrists to the sand with her metal hands. “You should’ve known better than to pick a fight with me. I can kick your fat ass anyway.”
Foxxess growled. “You balloon-legged bitch! What’s got you so obsessed with my butt, you hideous witch! You’d probably get off if I dropped a steaming load right in your big fat mouth!”
“You girls seem to be having fun,” a familiar voice remarked.
The two females looked over to see Grampa standing a short distance from them.
Grampa held a camera in his hands; he snapped a photo with a grin. “This is one for the history books.” He paused, staring at the girls. “Go on. Don’t mind me. I’ll just be over here recording.”
The girls ripped themselves away from each other, shooting to their feet and patting themselves off frantically.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” Foxxess cursed. She pointed a trembling finger at Grampa. “You better delete that at once, you pervert! It wasn’t what it looks like!”
“Fuck?” Bunnie questioned in disbelief, glaring at Foxxess. “That’s all you can ever think about, you weirdo! I should’ve left you in your twisted dream! Maybe then you wouldn’t have assaulted me like a horny caninyne!”
“Hey!” Foxxess cried. “You were the one on top! And you slapped my ass! You’re the weird one here, not me!”
Bunnie glanced at Grampa, who was totally absorbed in leering at his camera. “How about we call a truce? Let’s smash this freak’s camera and put this all behind us.”
Grampa’s eyes widened. He moved across the sand with surprising speed and leapt into the water, blasting away like a speedboat. “Hahaha! You’ll never catch me!”
Foxxess grinned. “You idiot! Your camera isn’t waterproof!”
Grampa stopped, treading water with a crestfallen look on his face. “Damn. You’re right.”
The two girls laughed in triumph, stalking back to their umbrella.
“I’m the youngest one here, yet you guys are always the ones acting like rowdy schoolkids,” Kitara muttered as her friends approached.
“Then you need to lighten up,” Foxxess quipped. “We’re on vacation! There’s no need to take things so seriously.”
Bunnie glanced at the ongoing taurite volleyball game. “Maybe we should join that beach volleyball match. They sure look like they’re having fun.”
A taurite male slammed his hand against the volleyball, launching it over the net like a cannonball. The projectile blurred as it whizzed over the other side, and the opposing team failed in their flailing efforts to repel the supersonic sphere.
“I’ve got it!” a taurite female cried; she stood at the very back of her team, serving as the final vanguard between the ball and defeat. And she was excellent at her forte, making a mad sprint across the sand. Her round objects bounced all over the place as she made for the round projectile that was dwarfed by her own. She got into position, squatting to bring the needed energy into her glutes for a powerful retaliation, enhancing the allure of her lower assets as they jiggled from the explosive motion. However, as she brought her hands together to launch the projectile, she realized that she’d misjudged its distance—the whirring ball plunged through the neat V created by her interlocked hands and smashed into the massive balloons waiting below, whose ridiculous volume and girth were barely kept in check by a pink bra.
The unfortunate taurite girl squealed. A pink bra shot through the air like a bullet, riding on top of a geyser of milk. The milk sprayed like a firehose as the girl continued squealing, rotating her form as she clutched at her smarting breasts, hosing down everyone in the area. Eventually, after both teams were soaking wet and a small pond had formed around the volleyball net, the poor girl managed to grab her weapons with both hands and cover their firing nozzles. She looked around apologetically. “I’m so sorry!”
“Like hell you are, Milkie!” a tall taurite girl snapped, folding her arms over her expansive breasts. “You always ruin everything with your milkers!” She stepped menacingly toward Milkie. “I should make sure that you’re always milked dry before allowing you to hang out with us.”
“No!” Milkie cried. “I’m sorry, Bessie! Please don’t milk me!”
A towering taurite male stepped over to Milkie, slipping out of his T-shirt and handing it to the girl. “Here. For your modesty.”
A towering taurite male stepped over to Milkie, slipping out of his T-shirt and handing it to the girl. “Here. For your modesty.”
Milkie blushed and slipped the T-shirt on. “Th-thank you, kind sir.”
“Hey!” Bessie snapped. “Who do you think you are? Don’t get in the way of me milking her!”
The taurite male met her glare with a pair of strong, steady blue eyes. “I am Mil King.”
All the taurites in the area gasped.
“Mil King?” one female said in shock. “The son of Milkang King?”
“The Prince of Moonia is here?” a male sputtered in disbelief.
“That is who I am,” Mil said, his deep resonant voice humbling everyone in the vicinity. “I came here to enjoy a humble game of beach volleyball. I believe that it’s necessary for a future king to understand his people by living alongside them.” He frowned as he stared down Bessie. “But I have been disappointed by the cruel behavior I’ve witnessed.”
Bessie shrank under his gaze, then collapsed to her knees, clutching her milkers. “Forgive me, Your Milkiness! Please milk me severely for my foolishness!”
Mil turned his face away. “You are not worthy of milking. Reflect on the error of your ways and you may one day be forgiven by Big Mommy, the supreme Goddess of this world.”
Bessie collapsed sobbing to the ground. “Forgive me, Big Mommy! Forgive me, and let the merciful rain from your divine Mommy Milkers wash over me and cleanse my sinful soul!”
Mil smiled at Milkie. “You’ve shown tremendous patience in this situation, Milkie. The beauty of your soul has captured my interest.” He turned away. “I have royal duties to attend to, so I will be taking my leave.” He glanced back at her, smiling slightly. “But I will return one day. Take good care of yourself until then, Milkie.”
Milkie blushed furiously, “Y-yes, my Prince!”
Bunnie, Foxxess, and Kitara took in this entire scene with blank looks on their faces.
“Maybe volleyball’s not such a good idea,” Foxxess muttered.
“Agreed,” Bunnie said.
“We could grab something to eat?” Kitara suggested.
“That sounds like a great idea!” Foxxess exclaimed. “I know just the place.”
#
Kitara, Foxxess, and Bunnie sat around a circular table with a scarlet cloth draped over its surface. Similar tables filled the room, each sitting underneath a chandelier that cast warm amber light from the small lanterns that sprouted from their spidery forms—which served as further evidence of the restaurant’s classy nature, because I can’t imagine how much of a pain it must be to light and maintain all those chandeliers.
The warm fiery light and the red satin tablecloth also gave the restaurant a certain vibe that Bunnie didn’t fail to pick up on. She glanced at Foxxess in annoyance as she toyed with a glass. “Where the hell did you take us? Are you trying to seduce us?”
Foxxess scoffed. “There’s no need to be so hostile. Milkelicious is the best restaurant in all of Moonia, and believe me, I’ve tried them all!”
“Oh, I do believe you’ve tried them all,” Bunnie said. “I can see it.”
Foxxess scowled. “I don’t know what’s got your panties in a bunch, but I’ll let that one slide for now.” She glanced at Kitara. “I wouldn’t want to ruin Kitara’s first experience here.”
“Your order has arrived,” a taurite male wearing a suit said, pushing a cart loaded with concealed dishes up to the girls’ table.
“Finally!” Foxxess said as the waiter began laying trays and dishes on the table. By the time the waiter retreated with his empty cart, a disparity could clearly be seen across the table; a mountain of plates piled with cakes, greasy cheesy entrees, and ice cream awaited Foxxess, while Bunnie and Kitara sat before small plates with modest servings.
“Sheesh,” Bunnie murmured, glancing over at Foxxess. “I ordered a cheesy omelette. You seem to have ordered an entire pantry.”
Kitara scooped a spoonful from a bowl of yogurt with strawberries floating within like small red islands. “You really must be hungry, Foxxess. But I remember that we got ice cream earlier—”
“Stop shaming me, you two!” Foxxess snapped. “When a girl’s gotta eat, a girl’s gotta eat! I’m not going to waste this vacation by ordering like a—like a prude!”
“Prude?” Bunnie questioned, forking her omelette and separating it into neat pieces with a knife. “That’s an odd choice of words. You truly must be a carnal creature to see food that way.” Her eyes widened as she caught Foxxess gobbling a cheesy article topped with whipped cream. “What the heck is that?”
Foxxess took a massive bite and responded as she chewed angrily. “It’s butter pizza with ice cream and whipped cream as toppings! Do you have a problem with that?”
“That does sound rather fatty,” Bunnie remarked.
Foxxess scowled, then picked up a piece of her pizza and shoved it into Bunnie’s mouth.
“Whumfh?” Bunnie exclaimed in surprise.
“I have keen hearing,” Foxxess growled. “I could hear your stomach growling. Only a spiritual savant like Kitara can hold back at a restaurant like this.” She grinned. “Now eat it.”
Bunnie consumed the article and stifled a burp. “Fine. You’re right. I was fighting to hold myself back.”
“You’re such a proud bitch, aren’t you?” Foxxess remarked affectionately.
“It takes one to know one,” Bunnie replied. She abruptly picked up a piece of pizza from Foxxess’ tray and shoved it in the vulpusite’s mouth.
Foxxess scarfed it down after a brief moment of surprise, then wiped whipped cream from her mouth and grinned at Bunnie. She rang a bell at the center of the table. “I’m ordering more. You still haven’t seen all that I’m capable of.”
“You’re challenging me?” Bunnie questioned, raising an eyebrow. “I’m a self-certified Foxxess ass-kicker. I’ll win against you in any contest.”
“We’ll see about that,” Foxxess said.
Kitara sighed. “Please, try having some restraint for once.”
The competitive females did not heed their friend’s words. The waiter zoomed back and forth with his cart, lathering the girls’ table with towering entrees of creamy cakes, sweet puffs, glistening greasy butter pizzas, fruit pies of every variety, fudgy brownies dripping with sultry amounts of caramel—has my description been sufficient to stimulate your imagination? As your loyal narrator, I’ve always done my best to portray the world of this story as accurately as any eye-witness in a trial. And yes, the word ‘trial’ is appropriate here because I was one of the many witnesses to a horrific crime. Innocent brownies, gullible glazed donuts, pitiful jelly pastries, crunchy yet delicate cookies of every variety, and every sweet, meat, and cheat-food the mind can desire was murdered at the Milkelicious restaurant that day. Murdered.
The gluttonous girls gulped the gelatinous goods down their gullets without a shred of remorse. They should have been shedding tears at the sight of their own depravity as they homicided all those defenseless sweets, but the only liquids they shed was slobber as they stuffed their cheeks like chipmunks, their eyes darting around like laser pointers as they selected their next victims. I cannot tell you for how long the crime occurred; the traumatic sight of it made me lose my grip on reality, but I can tell you for certain that it was a very long time.
Eventually, the one-sided war between two competing tyrants and the continual supply of unfortunate victims to their execution camp, otherwise known as a dining table, ended. The waiter threw up his hands and shook his head. He threw a scroll on the table: a parchment wrapped so many times that it resembled a gargantuan roll of toilet paper. Then he sighed deeply and folded his arms as he looked at the two girls.
Girls? Girls is a term that brings to the mind light-weight, delicate things—things that humanoid males can easily cradle to their chests or hoist over their shoulders. The two creatures lounging in their chairs with their tongues lolling out to the side could not be described as girls any longer—perhaps the term monsters would be more accurate, but I’ll avoid that descriptor for the sake of preserving the dignity that the duo now lacked.
Let’s go with the term, ‘large ladies’. The euphemistic nature of this term is so powerfully vague that it should really have you wondering: just how ‘large’ are these ladies? Well, both large ladies possessed a boulder beneath their breasts, where a belly, tummy, or stomach should be. The large ball of mass that they’d each accumulated rose to the height of their noses, nearly blocking their forward vision. These abused, bloated bags of compacted food gurgled as the large ladies groaned and gasped, wearing identical looks of pained regret in their eyes.
“Th-this is your fault,” Bunnie gasped. “I can’t even move because of you.”
“You— ” Foxxess abruptly burped, breaking off her response. The wavering unladylike noise blared for a solid ten seconds before silence returned to the room. She struggled to raise a finger and pointed it accusingly at Bunnie. “You went along with it!”
“It doesn’t matter who started it,” Kitara said in exasperation. “Just pay the bill already so that we can go.”
“What bill?” Foxxess muttered, straining her eyes. “I’m not seeing anything.”
“That’s because your fat belly is blocking the way,” Kitara remarked. “It’s on the table. It would take me a while for me to read it, so I’ll just say that it’s a lot of big numbers.”
Bunnie cursed under her breath. “I’m going to say it again. This is all your fault!”
Foxxess scowled, then smiled as her eyes fixed upon something on the table. A lone piece of vanilla frosted cake sat alone atop a pile of empty platters. “The competition isn’t over! Whoever eats that last piece of cake wins!”
“You’re on,” Bunnie said.
The two large ladies stared each other down for a good minute.
“I thought you said that you’re on?” Foxxess questioned. “Aren’t you afraid of losing? The loser has to pay the bill, of course.”
“Er, yes,” Bunnie said. “I will definitely defeat you.”
“Then defeat me already!” Foxxess cried. She raised an eyebrow. “You can’t eat another bite, can you?”
“Look at me!” Bunnie snapped. “Do I look like I’ve got any capacity left? I will literally explode and shower my remains across this room if I eat anything more!”
“But didn’t you say you could kick my ass at anything?” Foxxess cried in desperation.
“Why do you want your ass kicked so badly, you masochist!” Bunnie retorted. “You know what? I’ll defeat you right now!” Her metal hand shot forward and grabbed the cake.
“Finally!” Foxxess exclaimed with breathy relief.
Bunnie lifted her arm, then extended it beyond its usual reach, honing the cake toward Foxxess’ mouth.
Alarm flashed in Foxxess’ eyes. “What are you doing? Hey!”
“You were bluffing,” Bunnie growled. “And since you caused us all this trouble, I’ll give you a sweet dose of punishment.”
“Quit joking around!” Foxxess cried, her eyes widening as the cake slice zoomed toward her. “I really can’t eat another bite.” The cake slowed as it entered the final foot, and Foxxess let out a mouse-like squeak of terror. “Bunnie! Don’t do this to me! Bunnie—”
Bunnie stuffed the cake into Foxxess’ mouth, stifling her pleas with a squelching sound. She smiled savagely. “It’s creamy and salty, just like your dream. Now swallow like a good girl and I’ll pay the bill.”
Foxxess swallowed with some difficulty and her head lolled back as she groaned. Then the legs of her chair gave out and she plopped to the floor.
The waiter scowled.
Kitara looked over with alarm. “Hey! Foxxess! You okay?”
“She’s just fine,” Bunnie laughed. “She’s got plenty of cushioning.” She let out a villainous cackle. “Hahaha! I lost, but I still won in the end!”
“You’re paying for the chair,” the waiter said.
Bunnie frowned, then smiled once more. “This is still a win!” She continued her villainous cackle, only to be interrupted as a tremendous burp expelled forth from her lips, jiggling her immense girth in her chair—then her chair legs gave out and she plopped to the floor. She groaned, reaching a hand back to massage her rear. “Damn. For once, I wish I had a bigger butt.”
Kitara looked down at her, raising a skeptical eyebrow. “Still a win?”
Meanwhile, a certain testudyne wearing sunglasses took a sip from a milky beverage. He whistled under his breath as he watched a familiar female taurite approach his table.
Milkie bowed before Grampa, clad in a maid outfit that struggled to restrain her massive milkers. “My name’s Milkie. What can I do for you today, sir?”
Grampa smiled at her, then gasped in horror as he lost control of his cup, splashing the milky milkshake all over Milkie’s milkers.
Milkie gasped.
“Oh my,” Grampa said. “I am so sorry.” He picked up a napkin from the table and reached for Milkie’s breasts. A sly grin flashed on his face for a moment before being forced back into a look of concern. “Let me clean that up for you.”
“There’s no need, sir!” Milkie protested. “I’m, um, very sensitive on my—”
Grampa did not heed the warning. He firmly placed his napkin, and in the course of doing so, placed his hand on one of Milkie’s giant breasts. In an instant, the testudyne shot across the floor like a rocket, instinctively retreating into his shell to defend his form from the devastating blast of milk that propelled him. He came to a stop beside the collapsed chairs of Foxxess and Bunnie, popping his limbs and head out of his shell to survey the area. He smiled in pleasant surprise at the two large ladies. “My, my. I didn’t expect to meet with the two of you here.” His eyes flitted back and forth between Foxxess and Bunnie’s boulder-bellies. “Wow. How’d the two of you get knocked up so fast?”
“Still a win, Bunnie?” Kitara asked.
Bunnie deeply contemplated her situation for about a quarter of a second. Then she proceeded to behave in a manner that she’d later regret.
ns 15.158.61.48da2
