I was sitting on a chair in front of a tall mirror, while mama stood at my back. She was combing my hair repeatedly as if wishing for it to grow long.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJfMp8Lj1I
"You are so beautiful, my sweet Judy," she said, smiling. "When you grow up, you will make a good mistress of our home."384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlYie4Hc0hP
I closed my eyes and nodded in response.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡliwGdxy5v3
Whatever caused mama to be firm in raising me the way mothers bring up women confused me. She's been very vocal about her faith in God at home, in school, and most especially in the church, but she was also actively taking part in something that she knew was against His standards.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡktWZfLXN1a
Her children, including yours truly, happened to be all-male, but instead of being thankful for His wonderful gifts, she was still wishing for something impossible.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ93xTMLGRYA
When papa had not yet stepped on the ship, he once told us that Mama had always desired a daughter so that she could have someone to help her with the chores and bond with by combing and braiding hair, putting on make-up, dressing up, and other girly stuff.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0fjt4qrvRt
He even said that when I was born, I looked—you know, like that girly type of angelic the media portrayed angelic to be: soft, white skin, pinkish lips, and round eyes covered in thick, curly lashes. So she raised me as a girl. Of course, papa was against it, but the last thing he wanted for himself was to endure Mama’s unbridled bombardment of snide remarks. So this angelic-looking twelfth grader suffered the consequences.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjyrFWJPqD
My eyes flew open when something cold and hard buried itself in the strands of my hair. I fought the urge to raise an eyebrow as her butterfly hairpin sparkled above my right ear.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlLMn70eRsv
"There, beautiful." She appreciated before lacing her fingers through my hair for the last time. "I hope your hair grows longer. Let your beauty shine."384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNCRtH0q6r
She held out her arm.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNZi8nxfroM
"Come, dear, we have to go to the market. We are running out of supplies."384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdwabFP683V
I took her hand and allowed her to help me up.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKEbXYAU1u
384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIW40l3rGXz
We were about to leave for the market when one of my brothers arrived, carrying loads of supplies. It was our eldest. He placed the bags on the table when he reached the kitchen. Upon doing so, the band that kept his hair in a neat bun snapped, causing the black, wavy strands on his head to tumble about his broad shoulders.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9n7l3pLHga
"Oh, thank you so much, Joe, we didn't have to go to the market," said mama. "I hope we haven't taken up your time."384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡknIQ2gBaVN
"Nah," he answered in a deep voice.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2BXqn9DFR
I immediately arranged the supplies in our pantry, watching him sit by the head of the table and take off his damp, white shirt.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUDe1fjkyq
My lips tightened at the sight of it. I wish I was more like him. I wish I had his lean yet perfectly sculpted muscles, his hard, square face, his thin mustache, and his low, husky voice. But mama’s dream of having a daughter has wound me into becoming the keeper of the house. Me looking more like a girl must have added to it.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyOWmAITaJi
She sat on the right side and handed him a glass of water.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLnQeAa74G4
"Won't you miss work?" she asked.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLPMiuhZfEx
He downed the water in one swallow. "No, I'm on a day off," Joe replied. "I could do the laundry."384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0M0CwxPPX1
"But you don't need to, my son. You are a man." She placed her hand on the ripped arm of my brother. "Besides, Judy is here. She can take care of everything."384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOmrv6TRTi3
Joe's eyes darted on me as my hands mindlessly brushed my nearly skinny bicep. He smirked and chuckled.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNYYOZI29Lw
"Dude, you look like a plant. Can you take it off?" he said.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8amKSdLcA
He was talking about that golden butterfly clip Mama planted in my hair. I sighed but in relief. Finally, somebody realized just how awkward that looked.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHewVeZNE3
My brother stood and walked toward me, reaching out his fingers to remove that embarrassing piece from my head.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZxKWpNtezu
"There," he said, grinning like a dog. "Better."384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbzCrSAvOwS
He went back to his seat.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRcKmm9emC
Mama's eyes widened in horror. "Joseph! Why did you do that? Don't you see how pretty your sister looks?"384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXV5KQmrtRW
Joe turned his attention on mama.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2e4x2gd2QE
"Ma, Judah is my brother." He allowed the clip to twist between his thumb and forefinger.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiM2yBtB95p
Mama gently took the clip from him and enclosed his big hands in her brown fingers.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJpSpvdTph
She explained in a soft voice, "My dear boy, I understand where you are coming from, but you do remember my dream, right?"384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEB2kvqPFlI
Joe did not answer, so she gave him a nudge.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR9VBMCj5XW
"Right, anak?” Mama insisted.384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNFiZWfrJg5
His eyes rolled upward and he chuckled. "Judy."384Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7tob7lMYmJ
Then he rose from his seat and headed to his room.
Penana
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