I was sitting on a chair in front of a tall mirror, while mama stood at my back. She was combing my hair repeatedly as if wishing for it to grow long.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhduZMiFTgH
"You are so beautiful, my sweet Judy," she said, smiling. "When you grow up, you will make a good mistress of our home."383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOksAaG2nQ
I closed my eyes and nodded in response.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFZ7AyiKXzS
Whatever caused mama to be firm in raising me the way mothers bring up women confused me. She's been very vocal about her faith in God at home, in school, and most especially in the church, but she was also actively taking part in something that she knew was against His standards.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTp644sWqT
Her children, including yours truly, happened to be all-male, but instead of being thankful for His wonderful gifts, she was still wishing for something impossible.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ48h7SVVokw
When papa had not yet stepped on the ship, he once told us that Mama had always desired a daughter so that she could have someone to help her with the chores and bond with by combing and braiding hair, putting on make-up, dressing up, and other girly stuff.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVLcyhWfWH5
He even said that when I was born, I looked—you know, like that girly type of angelic the media portrayed angelic to be: soft, white skin, pinkish lips, and round eyes covered in thick, curly lashes. So she raised me as a girl. Of course, papa was against it, but the last thing he wanted for himself was to endure Mama’s unbridled bombardment of snide remarks. So this angelic-looking twelfth grader suffered the consequences.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFYjOrXYZf
My eyes flew open when something cold and hard buried itself in the strands of my hair. I fought the urge to raise an eyebrow as her butterfly hairpin sparkled above my right ear.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bNtBozfHX
"There, beautiful." She appreciated before lacing her fingers through my hair for the last time. "I hope your hair grows longer. Let your beauty shine."383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUWtIhSl1K
She held out her arm.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcPXrEnP5Dn
"Come, dear, we have to go to the market. We are running out of supplies."383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHw8VFcXRZ5
I took her hand and allowed her to help me up.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWApsiWqs0q
383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3t1SapA02W
We were about to leave for the market when one of my brothers arrived, carrying loads of supplies. It was our eldest. He placed the bags on the table when he reached the kitchen. Upon doing so, the band that kept his hair in a neat bun snapped, causing the black, wavy strands on his head to tumble about his broad shoulders.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAVyXXqg7lx
"Oh, thank you so much, Joe, we didn't have to go to the market," said mama. "I hope we haven't taken up your time."383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHbwcYTP0o
"Nah," he answered in a deep voice.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡStc8fsUOg2
I immediately arranged the supplies in our pantry, watching him sit by the head of the table and take off his damp, white shirt.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlfaQh5z2Dl
My lips tightened at the sight of it. I wish I was more like him. I wish I had his lean yet perfectly sculpted muscles, his hard, square face, his thin mustache, and his low, husky voice. But mama’s dream of having a daughter has wound me into becoming the keeper of the house. Me looking more like a girl must have added to it.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GDrYevT6e
She sat on the right side and handed him a glass of water.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBTO9BLZidc
"Won't you miss work?" she asked.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡge5sNRSuRU
He downed the water in one swallow. "No, I'm on a day off," Joe replied. "I could do the laundry."383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyhFLnGwuJp
"But you don't need to, my son. You are a man." She placed her hand on the ripped arm of my brother. "Besides, Judy is here. She can take care of everything."383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd1iBFJifdy
Joe's eyes darted on me as my hands mindlessly brushed my nearly skinny bicep. He smirked and chuckled.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmhNge9qWU
"Dude, you look like a plant. Can you take it off?" he said.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEHsJXaGPN
He was talking about that golden butterfly clip Mama planted in my hair. I sighed but in relief. Finally, somebody realized just how awkward that looked.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGMcfOjigE
My brother stood and walked toward me, reaching out his fingers to remove that embarrassing piece from my head.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8P97KbqS39
"There," he said, grinning like a dog. "Better."383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvD5c9gVywl
He went back to his seat.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Bj0uuwgFA
Mama's eyes widened in horror. "Joseph! Why did you do that? Don't you see how pretty your sister looks?"383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdx0UmP2JSV
Joe turned his attention on mama.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8REmoXXQCI
"Ma, Judah is my brother." He allowed the clip to twist between his thumb and forefinger.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoKORe85tA9
Mama gently took the clip from him and enclosed his big hands in her brown fingers.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIqszTsc2Cc
She explained in a soft voice, "My dear boy, I understand where you are coming from, but you do remember my dream, right?"383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1bDf8KNKK1
Joe did not answer, so she gave him a nudge.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOhyBRfv4J
"Right, anak?” Mama insisted.383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRd6J9etfc
His eyes rolled upward and he chuckled. "Judy."383Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2uD4N5TMQn
Then he rose from his seat and headed to his room.
Penana
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