hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory381Please respect copyright.PENANAATRUay8VJO
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 381Please respect copyright.PENANAnM2nY1roS3
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.381Please respect copyright.PENANAQcAK4uO90e
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?381Please respect copyright.PENANASXYR3OdMgy
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.381Please respect copyright.PENANAdgeQ864Se4
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.381Please respect copyright.PENANAchFDXknY6U
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.381Please respect copyright.PENANAiUSv7eHtty
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.381Please respect copyright.PENANAFD6fGKvPaX
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?381Please respect copyright.PENANAQTUNiCJKst
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.381Please respect copyright.PENANAPk7NZTQAJD
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.381Please respect copyright.PENANAabqBViiFok
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.381Please respect copyright.PENANACGFBTX3GKe
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 381Please respect copyright.PENANASLy4g4Spr1
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.381Please respect copyright.PENANA49SZI8LYVZ
girl bestie? - coco <3381Please respect copyright.PENANAYQAXrQFjwE
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.381Please respect copyright.PENANAHljbvKrTMz
age? - seven years old.381Please respect copyright.PENANATKLJsJZEDz
last person i texted? - idfk.381Please respect copyright.PENANAbCY5GVAq30
last person i called? - probably my little brother.381Please respect copyright.PENANAuv8Pj2dHTM
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?381Please respect copyright.PENANAndxC45lkj4
random fact? - i like food.381Please respect copyright.PENANAodcoAk2GsL
single or taken? - big, fat taken.381Please respect copyright.PENANAZTMFXv0hei
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.381Please respect copyright.PENANAlO9B0dPssO
first kiss? - bitch wtf?381Please respect copyright.PENANAC7EntP3dNP
ever smoked? - nope.381Please respect copyright.PENANA5Uku9gMby4
ever done drugs? - nope~381Please respect copyright.PENANA4hgafLCnkT
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.381Please respect copyright.PENANAYpqMLdFAZk
longest relationship? - five and a half months.381Please respect copyright.PENANAPEAeaESUmO
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.381Please respect copyright.PENANAGynu6WhVk2
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.381Please respect copyright.PENANA3YXqfDdjJV
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.381Please respect copyright.PENANAszwcHGfRdN
obsession? - kpop.381Please respect copyright.PENANAdLXVidN1Sx
do you give second chances? - that depends.381Please respect copyright.PENANAFEqHLwc7Su
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?381Please respect copyright.PENANAqnXQULC29c
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.381Please respect copyright.PENANAiQxzOrmS6l
day or night? - idk.381Please respect copyright.PENANAFEpdF0Vlla
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.381Please respect copyright.PENANAwHOMhSUVRv
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.381Please respect copyright.PENANAhfx8tqdVwa
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.381Please respect copyright.PENANA5hUmJGvUNO
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.381Please respect copyright.PENANAR1iKaFRhNh
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.381Please respect copyright.PENANAkBkWZCcvAf
favourite movie(s)? - idk.381Please respect copyright.PENANA4SEXLaJ9sG
current mood? - bored and tired.381Please respect copyright.PENANAamNZ6bOXbN
jealous of? - a lot of things.381Please respect copyright.PENANAJo6WMjyKQT
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.381Please respect copyright.PENANAgSz80i8znB
pets? - two dogs.381Please respect copyright.PENANAzNvvlemxdC
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.381Please respect copyright.PENANAVHoxcvNkM5
favourite number? - seven.381Please respect copyright.PENANA7vrdI0jeO6
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.381Please respect copyright.PENANAjW4zGw1STO
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.381Please respect copyright.PENANAMKV5QcoPuA
afraid of the dark? - yes.381Please respect copyright.PENANAkLwXFRvL0K
one wish? - to be happy for real.381Please respect copyright.PENANAhfIBu4ds0y
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?381Please respect copyright.PENANAYaeVFBJtoF
~381Please respect copyright.PENANAh8Zgf1jC42
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.381Please respect copyright.PENANAGeucl2ubOT
age? - i'm still seven years old.381Please respect copyright.PENANAklsQjjD4wm
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.381Please respect copyright.PENANAP9K24uyLLF
something you hate about yourself? - my body.381Please respect copyright.PENANASA4muuSCRF
something you like about yourself? - idk.381Please respect copyright.PENANA7sRDU7p0f3
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.381Please respect copyright.PENANAgOiddX9SkE
favourite band? - bts.381Please respect copyright.PENANArzma5Skbvv
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!381Please respect copyright.PENANAvzubyCmbOu
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.381Please respect copyright.PENANAkcjLgmba9P
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.381Please respect copyright.PENANAQaJcE3g4vO
girl crush? - emmi.381Please respect copyright.PENANAwtCD9WTLYZ
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.381Please respect copyright.PENANARJR2FNH6mc
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^381Please respect copyright.PENANAKzlogOHuZO
talents? - singing.381Please respect copyright.PENANAh1416qJQjf
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.381Please respect copyright.PENANA7GgnCbTNs7
someone i love? - emmi.381Please respect copyright.PENANA8PYa4K9nq1
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.381Please respect copyright.PENANApa3s2ndVrS
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.381Please respect copyright.PENANAlH2r6ytYor
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.381Please respect copyright.PENANA2qJlcf8xRh
favourite animal? - dogs.381Please respect copyright.PENANA7O1rGZ1uFl
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 381Please respect copyright.PENANAOhfAxL4fjf
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.381Please respect copyright.PENANASWMtqNdRsT
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.381Please respect copyright.PENANA3a78yRCLGX
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.381Please respect copyright.PENANAu9rAhT0ry1
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.381Please respect copyright.PENANAqlRWxTleeB
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 381Please respect copyright.PENANADhReeJEPNr
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.381Please respect copyright.PENANAeYLrbg3wDk
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.381Please respect copyright.PENANABp5XGI4Ibw
~381Please respect copyright.PENANAQY6cUYwD8t
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.381Please respect copyright.PENANARcp5CZwdgY
country? - i don't live on earth. 381Please respect copyright.PENANAzNivDGt5xK
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.381Please respect copyright.PENANAJ5cxeFxGA0
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.381Please respect copyright.PENANASxFOzJRBmw
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.381Please respect copyright.PENANAG1RSKtXqL9
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.381Please respect copyright.PENANA4lWbmcsrI1
country with your favourite accent? - australia.381Please respect copyright.PENANAWu8LFS8yk8
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.381Please respect copyright.PENANAHHvVzmmzqh
dog or cat person? - both.381Please respect copyright.PENANAbwcpR1gwO7
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.381Please respect copyright.PENANAZ4qUfQdufm
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.381Please respect copyright.PENANArbdWdYfxqO
do you belive in God? - idk.381Please respect copyright.PENANA5SClRp7yL6
single or taken? - taken.381Please respect copyright.PENANAROoX7y4FHE
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*381Please respect copyright.PENANAFKER6k4dpY
birthday year? - 1930.381Please respect copyright.PENANAyoF80nZ0r5
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.381Please respect copyright.PENANAF5Uo3gogVo
age? - what's that?381Please respect copyright.PENANAjVUNpYgivs
enthinicity? - african american.381Please respect copyright.PENANA44OUivrFAx
tea or coffee? - neither.381Please respect copyright.PENANAffoxVxgESA
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.381Please respect copyright.PENANA6HW2K9heC2
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*381Please respect copyright.PENANAbRN4nMWnWx
favourite food? - ice cream.381Please respect copyright.PENANAsTTuT52ONL
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 381Please respect copyright.PENANAlqIhWeqCik
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.381Please respect copyright.PENANAcEiZiF3XME
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.381Please respect copyright.PENANAU00cRbheew
favourite soda? - sprite.381Please respect copyright.PENANAhQHC7dkZOQ
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.381Please respect copyright.PENANAmIo48baNfh
can you swim? - yes, wtf?381Please respect copyright.PENANAlnsIFBWyIp
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.381Please respect copyright.PENANACDzEoz6wK6
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.381Please respect copyright.PENANAmOECz6FX6J
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.381Please respect copyright.PENANAbH2pqfaBvO
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.381Please respect copyright.PENANAEPZ88nyN1c
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*381Please respect copyright.PENANAG8hsgRXXEK
apple or andriod? - apple.381Please respect copyright.PENANAX0FSrFoFPq
best dessert? - mochi.381Please respect copyright.PENANATVV2WqlSl7
~381Please respect copyright.PENANAKUifdvRNSu
have you ever:381Please respect copyright.PENANA9IGkLKblDp
1. skipped class? - yes.381Please respect copyright.PENANAt3LHnfM4Zn
2. done drugs? - no.381Please respect copyright.PENANAxJky3xo7um
3. self-harmed? - yes.381Please respect copyright.PENANAYhWp12gjjR
4. drank? - no.381Please respect copyright.PENANAosuzW3Lmke
5. shoplifted? - yes.381Please respect copyright.PENANAfAdONLDiSl
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.381Please respect copyright.PENANAvstp11LusD
7. broken up with someone? - yes.381Please respect copyright.PENANANYJj6qGemL
what's your favourite:381Please respect copyright.PENANA1Rpag4Emtm
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.381Please respect copyright.PENANAq7aRrgbC0E
9. movie? - break the silence.381Please respect copyright.PENANAZugiTkAf7H
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.381Please respect copyright.PENANAqGgfBbtYxb
11. artist? - bts.381Please respect copyright.PENANA8xirGa16u9
12. singer or band? - bts.381Please respect copyright.PENANAQ3whmoXHia
13. memory? - idk.381Please respect copyright.PENANAwApSEHOQTn
14. book? - the cruel prince.381Please respect copyright.PENANAesHNB6Xz9D
this or that:381Please respect copyright.PENANAESbolBd9qe
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.381Please respect copyright.PENANABjxFQHXtbU
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.381Please respect copyright.PENANAkbp57nnspg
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.381Please respect copyright.PENANAjpdUDxpzG8
18. movies or books? - idk.381Please respect copyright.PENANAWDp7wkaP7T
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.381Please respect copyright.PENANALpBfmXHyLO
20. blind of deaf? - blind.381Please respect copyright.PENANAFmsBqACNk9
21. tea or coffee? - neither.381Please respect copyright.PENANAVjLBRWWnG5
what's your:381Please respect copyright.PENANA7LxeJaJVKl
22. age? - ninety-one.381Please respect copyright.PENANAykVQJqViJz
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.381Please respect copyright.PENANAEp0QTfOJOo
24. height? - 4'11.381Please respect copyright.PENANAqCc5g2wgdH
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.381Please respect copyright.PENANAH2NsOQUVJR
26. shoe size? - seven.381Please respect copyright.PENANAOajoixsk1O
27. religion? - i'm not religious.381Please respect copyright.PENANAeYmC2730BM
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.381Please respect copyright.PENANAiaZ1CFraOQ
opinion on: 381Please respect copyright.PENANA38O3ret5RR
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...381Please respect copyright.PENANAGrMB5K9cSJ
30. second chances? - it depends.381Please respect copyright.PENANA3cAaM8GLMd
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.381Please respect copyright.PENANA1YNgSvoL2f
32. abortion? - ew.381Please respect copyright.PENANApixr7fiHar
33. a death penalty? - ew.381Please respect copyright.PENANA7npYE6borp
34. marijuana? - i likes that.381Please respect copyright.PENANAoxshqzkfxP
35. love? - what's love?381Please respect copyright.PENANATGHhkOzm6Y
do you:381Please respect copyright.PENANAIqxVJaX8VT
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.381Please respect copyright.PENANALru4Px2S6z
381Please respect copyright.PENANAoqG4ZPUy9F
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3381Please respect copyright.PENANAZ74gq3mbEH