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顯這個人,多喝兩杯時總愛似懂非懂地發表些什麽。105Please respect copyright.PENANAlaVJrycEBF
105Please respect copyright.PENANApLAw4X8GTS
「愛情終究就是個循環論證。承載 “戀人” 本質的他者不能獨立於主體的愛意而存在。 蕭伯納說過,他大概可以給十萬個不同的女人同樣的愛情。」105Please respect copyright.PENANAKbR4Pn6tJl
105Please respect copyright.PENANAuhpQ8Ctow0
顯看著地板上數量可觀的啤酒罐,跟大夥繼續說:105Please respect copyright.PENANAX2xZB7A1yH
105Please respect copyright.PENANAGuJnXhdwqR
「人們只是剛好認識了十萬個當中的一個,交換了戀愛的認定,就以爲找到宇宙中獨一無二的另一半。」105Please respect copyright.PENANAXwdZZ5bHmq
105Please respect copyright.PENANAXuW1hP2Bzg
我坐在地上,頭靠在沙發邊。我認識顯好幾年,曉得他引用的蕭伯納大概都是亂說一氣。但我也清楚,他的十萬個可能性中不包括我。105Please respect copyright.PENANAL4zaRMEM8s
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【2】105Please respect copyright.PENANA7CE3mXgJm6
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在波蘭的香港留學生不多,畢業后留下來工作的更少。在香港朋友圈子的聚會,總是會碰見幾個面熟但不算認識的。開始時,顯就是其中一個。105Please respect copyright.PENANAwZDepZRHSE
105Please respect copyright.PENANAD7xBYU6ChK
顯風趣機智,話多,卻對世界沒太大興趣和善意。他當時已經有個結婚三年的妻子,但對我來説也無差,反正我當時更大的煩惱比比皆是。我跟顯很快地要好了起來。105Please respect copyright.PENANAdon11lLIY9
105Please respect copyright.PENANAy6DiIMvg7g
那段日子我一邊在寫半工讀的碩士論文,一邊跟他幽會。我們一周見上兩三次,時間都不長。通常是去維斯瓦河畔的爵士酒吧聼音樂閑聊,不然就是直接上旅館。現在回想,我們好像還沒試過獨處多於半天。105Please respect copyright.PENANAgzDAb9xbsK
105Please respect copyright.PENANAGaaPUhck6T
我們聊過些什麽都已忘得七七八八,連他吸引我的特質也只剩下模糊的印象。但酒吧區柏樹的氣味,還有那旅館幽暗登記處的風鈴,印象卻是異常清晰。105Please respect copyright.PENANAUT1ecXRlq7
105Please respect copyright.PENANAdDI7egDoBs
有天,顯送了一條項鏈給我,叫我跟他回香港。我想了三天。三天后碰面,在我回答前,顯就跟我說對不起,他還是決定要留在華沙。之後,我們也各種原因疏遠了起來。105Please respect copyright.PENANAgm49sCtOeT
105Please respect copyright.PENANAvvJcMzhp38
大概過了兩年,我在顯家附近吃飯時,碰見了他和幾個我也認識的友人。好像顯的妻子正在出遊,他們要去顯家喝酒,最後把我也拉上了。105Please respect copyright.PENANAoexlHyTf3A
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【3】105Please respect copyright.PENANAvFOZK6pSMZ
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我喝得不少,迷迷糊糊睏睡起來。友人把我叫醒,說時間不早要走了,讓我也洗個面叫車回家。105Please respect copyright.PENANA25bQFmXH7i
105Please respect copyright.PENANAgDP30eZHCO
我梳洗時聽見友人陸續出門的聲音,出盥洗間一看果真都走了,只剩下顯在擺弄著他的黑膠唱片。我拿起桌子上的蘋果咬了起來,聽他播起Bruno Mars 的Unorthodox Jukebox。105Please respect copyright.PENANAAChc6bpCeZ
105Please respect copyright.PENANAO0rpkMk3Ia
凌晨三點的Bruno Mars,奇怪的品味。105Please respect copyright.PENANAhYiA52CRPS
105Please respect copyright.PENANAld2mcHDErM
我突然好奇,如果我一直坐著,顯什麽時候會叫我離開。105Please respect copyright.PENANAyBlFYnFcpQ
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顯最後也沒有開口叫我走。那晚,我睡在他床,顯睡沙發。105Please respect copyright.PENANAUPX1PGrAmu
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第二天醒來,我們二人簡單弄了早飯,把香腸煎香,加上鯷魚乾和洗乾净的沙拉雜菜,送白米飯。然後泡起了茶,相依在沙發上看電視。105Please respect copyright.PENANAtBwBgjNKbe
105Please respect copyright.PENANAQZJIEicVdB
我們呆呆看著新聞直播著土耳其地震的消息。半晌,顯說:「會不會想吃雪糕?但冰箱好像已經沒有了。」105Please respect copyright.PENANANXzRC0nRhz
105Please respect copyright.PENANAsxJhTTh6WL
「我可以去買。」我説。我有預感,買過雪糕,我大概只會放在顯家門口,然後也差不多該走了。105Please respect copyright.PENANA3rRbP6q8v4
105Please respect copyright.PENANAH6n67VueZP
顯看著我的眼睛好幾秒,說:「還是網購外送吧。雪糕飲品什麽的都有。」105Please respect copyright.PENANAhdbh0uL4hp
105Please respect copyright.PENANA8EEJrQVPrw
然後,我們還買了橘子、手製意大利麵、補充了啤酒和威士忌,還有一個風信子盆栽,和幾本我一直未看完的小説。105Please respect copyright.PENANA1FWQmjYWEb
105Please respect copyright.PENANADsO53seRM6
網購下午送到。晚餐我們弄可樂餅意大利麵和烤蘆筍,看了幾套B級恐怖片,直到睡着。105Please respect copyright.PENANAPtImOR1cSE
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【5】105Please respect copyright.PENANA6tVyijT1gr
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第三天,在我關掉手機前,工作的地方和男友都打了好幾次找我。105Please respect copyright.PENANABHJfAOq1Oo
105Please respect copyright.PENANA0bIqWtIHNm
我們整天只吃了蘋果和餅乾,一口氣説起了幾年來的話。105Please respect copyright.PENANAFhapUpPjzi
105Please respect copyright.PENANAKmVWi1dESC
顯把滿屋的窗簾都拉了起來。我們懶洋洋地做愛。105Please respect copyright.PENANAyhz5rfmpug
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【6】105Please respect copyright.PENANAItGOmC96SR
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第四天,顯妻子聘的鐘點工要來作每周一次的清潔,顯不好把她拒之門外。我躲在衣櫃,在漆黑的空間中專注著呼吸。燈光穿透櫃門的隙縫射出一條直綫,隱約展現櫃中灰塵的流動。105Please respect copyright.PENANAH4xfaRDrQr
105Please respect copyright.PENANA6toiqxoNdO
晚上,我們烤比薩喝啤酒,完成了我在衣櫃中找到的五百塊拼圖。唱片機都在放Eagles。我弄起了可露麗餅,一屋子的焦黃芬香。105Please respect copyright.PENANAab01y6dppU
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第幾天了?顯好像也忘了妻子什麽時候要回來,還是已經無所謂了吧。105Please respect copyright.PENANA2yORp5KHQJ
105Please respect copyright.PENANAwD2hUL2ox7
「鎖著的門最終必然會被鑰匙打開,陽光也將覆蓋佈滿青苔的角落。」我望著鏡中幾天沒剃鬍子的臉,心想。105Please respect copyright.PENANAl8jeKtvs9w