Maybe I should care if it's a trauma response. I'm not sorry that I don't think I do care if it is one though. Because in the end coping from trauma can be healing. Changing as a person into someone new to protect yourself doesn't always have to be a bad thing. If changing who you are allows your mind to open up enough to grow, then it's the right thing for life. Maybe this is all just me running from all the shit that's happened to me, and maybe it is me thinking the grass is greener on the other side. Maybe it wasn't for you, but it will be for me if that's where I’m supposed to be. Sometimes it's okay to live in a trauma response state if it helps you grow. You couldn't prevent some traumas and all that's left to do is respond and react to it. Maybe I am gay because of what happened to me, that doesn't mean I need to “heal the gay away” and maybe I shouldn't. Because if my traumas made me the person I am today, then so did my responses to said trauma. And to take away the choices I've made you take away me to be the version you think I should be. Maybe just maybe I am okay with that reason being the reason I am who I am, and that to me healing doesn't involve changing those parts of me.62Please respect copyright.PENANAANkpqu5LoW
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-Anastasia Ava (Borderline Poetry)
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