係Lift到我再一次同Tiffany夾下口供。
「我地兩個人點識?」
「義工活動。」
「識左幾耐?」
「半年。」
「拍左拖幾耐?」
「半個月。」
「我叫做?」
「寄明,寄望個寄,明天個明。」
「你叫做?」
「晨曦個曦,優雅個雅。」
「我幾歲?」
「廿三。」
「你呢?」
「女人年紀係秘密。」
「非常好,冇得頂,完全零死角呀!」
我同Tiffany夾口供時盡量避開對方既個人資料同埋私隱問題,甚至連全名都未問清楚,但係呢啲都夠應付班花生友,要知道對方審犯係審自己親屬,第一次黎未熟絡既佢地都會保持住「謙謙君子」既態度。
拎住個袋包好左既神仙水,我望左望錶。
十點五十八分,婆婆同大細舅應該未到,即係最煩膠既細舅母同威仔未會出現,家陣要應付既應該只係阿姨、老表阿鈞同埋表妹阿茵。
呢關一定要頂過去。
畢寄明,fighting!!!
你行上前禁左禁門鐘,然後聽到一把女聲。
「黎緊!」
耳邊響起仆街mon經典既對戰音樂,眼前彷似出現左敵對訓練員挑戰你既畫面。
—與阿姨家的戰鬥開始了!—
—YOU ARE CHALLENGED BY MK表妹阿茵—
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「喂,畢寄明乜今日咁早?唔洗同你班豬朋狗友打————?」MK阿茵未開哂門就已經準備奚落我一番,但係當佢一打開門見到企係你身邊既tiffany時,突然個咀O到可以塞落一隻雞蛋,講緊既說話都未講得哂就呆左。779Please respect copyright.PENANAcJTa7k4syz
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砰!779Please respect copyright.PENANAkJkMKCHFTH
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阿茵大大力咁關埋度門。779Please respect copyright.PENANAkZvwV5b9OY
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「喂,死女包!做乜呀你!」面對佢呢下突然既關門,我有少少不知所措。779Please respect copyright.PENANAfgTGIuYaLd
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「痴線架,日光日白撞鬼呀!呀哥!救命呀!表哥佢身背後跟住個好靚既女鬼呀!」隔住度門,我都聽到阿茵鬼殺咁嘈既叫聲。779Please respect copyright.PENANA4FLKRZz1Yk
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「呃...唔好意思,我表妹佢個腦有少少問題。」我轉身對住Tiffany露出一個非常抱歉既表情,而佢就露出一個哭笑不得既表情。779Please respect copyright.PENANAH5sUqnRH4U
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「唔係呀,幾搞笑呀。」779Please respect copyright.PENANA73DVTOcdbW
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好快,到無神論者既老表阿均黎開門,而我都聽到佢大大聲咁笑緊佢呀妹:「呢個世界都唔存在咩鬼怪,叫左你讀多少少書,唔好睇咁撚多鬼故架喇,家陣壞腦喇!」779Please respect copyright.PENANAtHkTOs1djH
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「喂,明仔,尋晚阿仙奴俾曼城炒三一,你點———」表哥見到我之後仲可以正常咁講野,但當佢目光餘角掃到Tiffany時,突然臉色即刻變到蒼白。779Please respect copyright.PENANAr84MqqWgWO
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屌,你兄妹都一樣架。779Please respect copyright.PENANAt85Rwlvq5L
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我好清楚之後既劇情係點發展,我以迅雷不及掩耳既速度卡住度門,唔會條仆街一野關番去。779Please respect copyright.PENANAeK1DT83gwu
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「頂,佢唔係女鬼呀!佢係我女朋友呀,唔好再痴線丟架喇!」779Please respect copyright.PENANA6x6Ses57Lg
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「媽,快快手黎幫拖,有人冒充明仔想闖入屋呀!佢後面仲跟住隻女鬼呀!!!」平時好淡定既老表阿均都開始尻叫。779Please respect copyright.PENANAmHsJIOBbxb
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係阿姨出馬之後,我同埋Tiffany終於成功入到屋,坐左係沙發到。779Please respect copyright.PENANAEkaAlxhg1r
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「明仔,叻仔啵,幾時識到個咁靚既女朋友呀?阿姨一早就話左你係好男仔,實會有人要架喇!」779Please respect copyright.PENANAvdfi9p1vny
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阿姨,尋晚你同阿均好似先笑完我黎?779Please respect copyright.PENANArxOF40eTAx
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「係囉,呢位靚女姐姐叫咩名?」阿茵又插一咀。779Please respect copyright.PENANANsui5YG6Jo
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「我同Tiffany係半年前識架,都係最近先真係一齊咋嘛。」我應道。779Please respect copyright.PENANAPOzfmuKdEJ
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因為由細照顧到你大,所以阿姨當正我係半個仔咁。779Please respect copyright.PENANACaQ1FpVkbq
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「哦,Tiffany呀,我地明仔份人雖然木木獨獨、無乜情趣,不過呢啲係家族遺傳,佢地都唔想,但佢真係個好男仔黎。」阿姨面露笑容,對於睇落去大方得禮既Tiffany非常滿意。779Please respect copyright.PENANAXEiOIu7Y9h
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坐係一邊食花生既阿均同埋正睇緊報紙既姨丈都突然感覺自己中左一槍,然後一齊轉身望住我。779Please respect copyright.PENANAISlrshhwYA
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你地咁睥住我冇用架大佬,你老婆、你老母講架句野,你地有野要blame就搵佢嘛,望我都改變唔到架!779Please respect copyright.PENANAom28qtTV9E
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「係喇,明仔,家姐同你呀爸知道左你拍拖未?」阿姨問道。779Please respect copyright.PENANAFDJo1qojxz
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「未講佢地知呀,諗住一陣俾個驚喜佢地!」779Please respect copyright.PENANAuQGaNbBCHx
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「咁樣都好既,我都唔知你會帶女朋友仔上黎,我而家去加多雙筷子先。」阿姨埋怨道,然後離開座位,又番左去屬於佢既戰場廚房作戰。779Please respect copyright.PENANA0ryOSnBGsx
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呢個時候阿茵即刻補上黎,正值雙八年華有突少少既佢對於戀愛充滿住好奇心,一上黎就準備問個痛快,同時我都感覺到阿均同姨丈兩人個耳仔好似擘大左咁。779Please respect copyright.PENANA7Km9CPygYv
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「你值得擁有一個更好既人。」開場白居然係想離間?779Please respect copyright.PENANA0Ufpl93x8Z
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我似係咁易俾你做低咩?779Please respect copyright.PENANAGysWH5NQFA
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「唔係呀,我覺得Tiffany已經夠好,佢係我心入面係完美架喇!弱水三千,我只取一瓢飲。」我含情脈脈咁樣望住Tiffany。779Please respect copyright.PENANAIzmoH9Mseb
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為左應付你班友仔,我一早背左唔少野,連詩都可以吟埋出黎!今次點輸呀!!!779Please respect copyright.PENANAgzQBZ8AZW9
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「頂,我唔係講緊你呀。Tiffany姐,你真係可以換過個好啲既男朋友,配呢隻未完全進化既人型猩猩真係浪費左你。」779Please respect copyright.PENANAjEyF149nGI
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...779Please respect copyright.PENANAX8jmeUv5e4
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「???」喂小姐,你真係我表妹?779Please respect copyright.PENANARvtcVsIjJr
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Tiffany輕輕一笑,然後翹住我既手臂:「我就係鍾意佢呢種咁既原始人,咁樣既傻瓜先唔會呃我,而且對我夠專一。」779Please respect copyright.PENANAnzwmO7ctow
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曦雅,好波!入戲居然入得咁快!779Please respect copyright.PENANAqZXe9pEM3i
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「你執到喇,畢寄明!好好錫住tiffany姐姐佢呀你!」779Please respect copyright.PENANApjSL8ajqsD
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得喇得喇,知架喇!779Please respect copyright.PENANA8wJOR2LrqE
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「係既!」我爽快回答,死女包居然唔再追擊我,真係太好了。779Please respect copyright.PENANALKtDbURFgi
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你我地成功化解左表妹第一輪攻勢,然後由得兩女自己傾女人話題,聽到佢地係到講化妝品同埋女性youtuber後,我就知道呢邊已經成左定局。779Please respect copyright.PENANAviEjxmS9TT
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我急急腳咁拖住老表入去打fifa,我咁大個仔第一次咁想踢波,咁想俾人炒四五六。一陣十二點其他人就會到,而家呢個時間我可以先好好回口氣。779Please respect copyright.PENANAcnouIqsOQf