x
ITS ME GABRIEL ELIJAH IS STUPID THIS IS MY CHAPTER TO HIS STUPID FANFIC.
Chris Chris thrnodyke was sitting on his couch waching his tv and then a show claled “perry mason” came on the tv
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“Your honor,” said parry. “As u can see my cleint did not do the bad. My client is not guitly becus of his maranda rites and becas of the law.”
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My honor slammed the hammer and said “yeah okay” and then parry won and his clien made money.
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Gradpa Thornydke was sitting in his char and lauged “GREAT SCOTT!! THAT LAWSUIT PERRY MASON JUST MADE AGAINST THAT MURDERE R WAS EXTRAORDINARY!!!! Good tv”
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“Yeah wow that is so cool and really cool.” said chris, “i wish lawyers and the law were reel so i could do that to tale…..”
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“you literally can dude” grandpa thorndyke showed Chris a picture of Phoenix Right “he’s a lawyer bro”
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“Wow” said chris looking at the spike-laden man. “His name is phoenix, right?”
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“You were never funny…” grandpa thornsysk walked away and left the framed photo of Phoenix behind
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Chris ws so angry that he picked up the latpop thatb the picture was on and said “i will sue miles prower for all his money and gamma and you will help me, pheenix arizona.”
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“HOLD UP!” Phoenix was in the living room “I’m gonna need some cash to sue this small literal kindergartener, I am a REAL attorney after all, look at my bage” Phoenix showed off his bade. “So I need money.”
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Chris wouldn’t believe he was a ttorney if it weren’t for this badge.”
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“Yeah ok.” chris gave him the moeny left over from charles entertainment cheddar.
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“But nick!” says the stupid girl maya, “we weer suposed to watch steal samurai tonite not sue a dum child boy.”
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Phoenix punched maya in the mouth. “Shut up May! We need money.”
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Maya is angry so she puts a burger in her mouth and eats it with her mouth.
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“You’re going to be fat and ugly if you eat more burgers you stupid bitch”
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TIls was hitting Espio cause he killed him
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Author’s note: read last chapter
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“Ow”
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“This is what you get you stupid lizard”
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Gamma was angree while playing tomatapoutoamus originations and then broke everything.
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“Espio isnt lizard hes chameleon.” said gamma robotly.
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“No”
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“Ok” gamma says and changes his sistems to fix this logical erorr.
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“Good job gamme” tails kissed his metal leg
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Gamma blushed likea roobot would.
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“Maya you fat whore we are here at the tails’ house’ Phoenix was here at the tails’ house with maya
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May chanelled mia and she slapped phinx in the face.
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Phoenix beat up Maya and kicked in the stomach and punched her in the mouth over and over and broke her teeth and kicked her in the eye
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Maya was so enraged and then she was wrongly conccused of murdern and then she was proven innocent in law court and then ate another burg and then they came back to tails’s house again.
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“who are you” tails said like a tail would
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“I’m Phoenix right I am suing you for killing my clint Chris hrosneydke” Phoenix said
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Author’s note: I mis spelled Thorndyke in this part I’m sorry
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“Yea!” chris said angrily. “Your going to be sued and give me all ur money and ur gammer!”
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Gamma is a robot and chris is going to take him with lawsuit and money.
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“OBJECTION! We never agreed to robot stealing, idiot dumb kid.”
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“If u help me do a robot stealing than i will give you all my steel samarai trading cards.” said thorndyke chrissily.
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Maya said “Oh my god nick we need the samarai trading cards!” she said.
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“Shut up, we don’t need anything, dumb lady. Girls are lame.
But those trading cards are cool!”
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“I knew u were seel samrai fan everyone is even your lover edgeworth.” maya
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“he is not my lover I just like to hold hands with him” phoen xi was gay
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They all went to court and maya smuggled in phoenix who was gay into court in a rainbow duffel bag.
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In the elevetor someone asked her “is ur kid in that bag?”
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And then she said to thm “no. well, not my kid.” maya said.
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Phoenix claws his way out of the bag and walked into the courtroom “I ARRIVED JUST IN TIMEl he was late, as gays typically are.
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In the prosecuter side of trial room sit wiston payne and tails the tale and gamma the gamer robot.
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“Ur honor it is cleer that these people did not kill chris thornydyke!” winson said. “And we all have all sorts of witnessers to prove it! Witness 1 come to the stand!”270Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEMHz72WMY
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Kratos wakled up to the witness because he was a witness.270Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOowAecWTUU
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“Yess hello i am kratos and i saw chris die. I was eating burrito and listening to song in my car when it happened and it wanst tale it was jesus who did it. I saw jesus on the cross singing tubthumping.” this was his testimony.
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Phoenix smacked his podium. “What song were you listening to?”
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“It’s The End Of The World As We Know It by REM.”Krates said, forgetting the parantheses.
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Phoenix rubbed his chin. “Ok.”
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Tails was playing on his Nintendo DS in his chair n3xt to Phoenix
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Maya was playing on her New Nintendo 3DS XL because she’s better.
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“What time of day was this, Mister Of War?” Phoenix staired at Kratos
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“It was 1 PM, the time that I always eet my burrito in my car.” kratos
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“OBJECTIFIEDICTION!” said winston paryne. “What does the time of day have to do wth wether tale killed chris or not???”
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“Cause murder is illegal at 1PM, Mister Payne, everyone knows that!” Phoenix pointed at Winston Payne
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Winston Payne winced in pain. “Uff, that’s true!”
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“And my client is 8 years old, everyone knows it is illegal for children to kill people!”
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Krato sscreamed in surprise “no, it cant have been tale to do it!” kratos tore off his toupee and threw at tails, revealing his bald head.
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“No” Phoenix shrugged “he killed him dude”
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Kratos declered war against the gods and kile d all of them because he was so angry, and then pased out on witness sand.
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“Yeah, good! So good!’ cheered chris
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“Ok if we keep killing these guys they won’t try to say Tails is innocent so all we have to do is frustrate them into death”
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“Frustrating people is my middle name!” said Maya Frustratingpeople Fey.
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“Shut the fuck up”
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“Next witness numb 2!” yelled mr winston.
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Knuckles burst through the ceiling and kicked the shit out of chris and then went back to the witness stand “sorry needed to get thay out of my system”
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Phoenix nodded “been there, I beat up Maya all the time, there’s nothing wrong with hitting a woman if she talks back to a man.”
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Maya whined and cried while in the fetal posishion.
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“Go back to being a baby maker, you worthless sack of shit woman, this is why I’m gay.”
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Knuckles punched the witness stand “Tails did not kill Chris because I did he is a stupid manipulater idiot. He convinced me to kill my best friend tails cause I hought head steal the master emerald but it was a lie so I killed chris”
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tails growled “NO, I KILLED CHEIS THORNSYDJE”
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Author’s note: I miss spelled Thorndyke again
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“Shut up tails we’re trying to prove you didn’t murder him you stupid idiot fox” Phoenix said homosexually
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Chris is confused about who is on whos side now.
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Gamam tries to calculae his using robot power, but he got bored and stopped.
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Phoenix pointed at the wall. “no” and then pointed at Knuckles “thank you I see no flaws in this story”
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Knuckles left
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“What the fuck Phoenix” Mia fey said beig chaneled by maya frustratingpeople fey.
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Phoenix backhanded Mia “shut up Skank” and killed her
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“Aint no skank.” said maya and then dropped an atm machine on phoenix.
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“Bitch”
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tails kicked knuckles in the knuckles
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Maya punched Chris in the thorndyke.
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Gamma hurt winston pain until he screamed in payne.
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Phoenix slapped his podium and stood silently. “ok everyone shut up it’s time for the cross examination.”
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Phoenix cross examined
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“Ok I see no problems I think we’re good tails didnt kill chris”
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Suddenly klavier gavin showed up and killed mr winston and played Through the Fire and Flames by Dragonforce on his guitar.
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“I am the proseatur now and I will proov tails did!”
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Phoenix pulled out a gun and shot Klavier in the face and killed him. “Ok trial over lets go home I got money for Chris”
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Klavier played Bring Me To Life by Evanescence and then died.
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“Wate r u still on my teem?” cris said.
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“fuck uh yeah sure shit I forgot” Phoenix forgor “TAILS KILLED CHRIS AND COMMITED A HATE CRIME CAUSE CHRIS IS GAY!”
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Maya was bored and fays timing with Austin Powers.
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“Shagedelic”
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“I-I am not gay!” Chris screamed.
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Everyone in the court turned to Chris, shocked at his sudden outburst.
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“I know Tails killed me! I knew he did, I sang Tubthumping, as if I could ever make such a mistake. Never- Never! I just couldn’t prove it. He covered his tracks. Got that idiot in the car eating the burrito to lie for him. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This- this chicanery? He’s done worse. That robot Gamma! Are you telling me a man just happens to make a killer robot which hunts me down? No! HE orchestrated it! Tails!...He POISONED my Chuck E. Cheese PIZZA! And I saved him! And I shouldn’t have. Took him into my own home to play Tomatopotamus. What was I THINKING? He’ll never change. He’ll NEVER change! Ever since he was 6, couldn’t keep his hands out of the deadly weapons. But not our precious Tails—COULDN’T BE PRECIOUS TAILS! KILLING THEM DEAD! And he gets to be an inventor? What a sick joke. I should have stopped him when I had the chance. And you-” Chris said, motioning to the jury. “You have to stop him, you-”
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Chris looked around at the faces of everyone in the court room, all disgusted at him. Everything he said was the God’s honest truth, but Chris’s outburst was inexcusable, and nobody could ever believe him.
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“Your honor, my client had a small emotional outburst, you can’t fault him for that, he’s just a child!”
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“Phoenix, he’s 12, he’s more than old enough to know not to throw a temper tantrum in the courtroom.” The judge grimaced at Chris.
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“[Aw, man… I’m totally losing this case.]” Phoenix frowned. “Wait! If I can present one piece of evidence that proves Tails killed Chris, then his outburst won’t discredit him…” Phoenix perked up, excitedly, like a Phoenix would. “Your honor! Tails is a murderer and I will prove exaclty how!” Phoenix went over to Tails, and moved his fur out of the way, revealing a crucifix necklace. “THIS is the murder weapon! A necklace that was used to channel Christ to kill Chris, now, your honor, all I have to do is…” Phoenix grabbed the necklace and screamed in pain, the skin on his palm burning off, because he’s a lawyer and touched a crucifix.
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Author’s note: Why are lawyers buried 10 feet down? Because deep down, they’re all good people.
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“THAT WAS MY GAY HAND I USED TO DO GAY TO EDGEWORTH!” Phoenix was gay because his sad hand was burnt
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The bailiffs immediaely grabbed Phoenix and threw him out for that.
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Maya is half blind from using 3D mode on the 3DS too much now and fell over out of the court.
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Knuckles walked up to Chris and beat the living shit out of him
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Chris died again becase of that.
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Winston Payne sadly left nd dragged out klavier’s corpse.
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gamma left
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Edgeworth walked up to Phoenix and puched him in the face and breaked his arms and crushd his femur and torn out his ribcayj and slapped him and gave him a culumbian neck tie and kissed him and then he and maya left to watch steel samurai.
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“bye babe” pjoenx
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Shadow, once *sonc, sees that tails was proven innocent o f killing chris in the newspape and is angry!270Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJLPlaSsgT
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Author’s Note: See Chris & Knuckles
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“We need to stop him 4eva!” says shadow.
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“Yeah okay” eggman
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CHRIS THORNDYKE WILL RETURN.
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