Chapter Theme Music: Abiogenesis ~ Carbon Based Lifeforms
<11/01/149,566 {Avion 148} - 08:17 | Corral Position, Genosis, Altiri Sector Space>113Please respect copyright.PENANABwid5zmubQ
<Karnak to ACS414 Date Equivalent: 11/01/2010>113Please respect copyright.PENANADR441wge1j
<Telepathic Link: Established | Telepathic Strength: Moderate ~ {47oN}>113Please respect copyright.PENANAXUtrL8o0yp
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Trying to concentrate on this moment only became more difficult, as the crowds of people and the hallway walls were so much to take in with this new level of detail. Reed was going through the halls of his school, and I was taken along for the ride, observing every sight and sound around me, overwhelmed with the sensory overload of this alien world. There's always so much more to see here than there is in my world, inside of buildings and outside with nature.113Please respect copyright.PENANAvS6NO06hMS
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My mind was also more alert than ever before, my eagerness to amass more knowledge of this place consuming. I didn't let onto Reed that I was so taken away by the environment around us, as I wasn't sure what he would think if I become too excited about something he was used to seeing daily. Even so, he seemed distracted and anxious about the idea of having me hang around, which wasn't necessary.113Please respect copyright.PENANAm2mqugnuC1
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Reed's eyes shifted around so much, so I got to see even more about the school, the good and the bad. The windows gave amazing sights to the outdoors, with subtle and shallow forests surrounding the place, but the ceiling tiles looked dirty with dust, the floors ruined with whatever the hundreds of shoes tracked onto them. The people all round Reed weren't looking at him strangely, but Reed might as well have been acting suspicious with his nervousness on full display. Doesn't he understand that I can't be heard or seen by others? There isn't a need to panic.113Please respect copyright.PENANABO0KmRGqJn
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I ignored his behavior for now, keeping quiet to take in more around me. The cramped halls were unfortunately loud and somewhat annoying, so I focused mostly on the outfits everybody else was wearing. Again, clairvoyance never allowed me to see everything so closely for a prolonged sustained duration, not with this level of detail. Now that I think back to it, it was almost comparable to seeing through a thin veil or fog, as if some sort of blanket of soft darkness cut down the flow of light around our third eye.113Please respect copyright.PENANAUzh1h9nnpv
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I know I've discounted the detail difference between Human sight and Altiri sight; even so, either occulation is still sharper than clairvoyant sight, far more defined and flamboyant. The outfits were particularly interesting, since we see so many different variations of styles all the time.113Please respect copyright.PENANAANjFUBnuMM
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Eventually, Reed got into his classroom, us both keeping quiet while I let him pan around the room randomly, learning more about this mysterious learning environment. Despite all I've seen in life, this somehow felt too exciting!113Please respect copyright.PENANAC1jX5R3UXl
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Reed is awfully quiet though. I wonder if what happened earlier outside the bus area is still on his nerves... It was a most interesting display to me, how he could be so hostile to another person like that. It didn't exactly look random, and I'm certain there must be a reason for that. I know Reed, enough to know he never speaks to women like that, not without some reason. There's only one way to find out. "So... Who was that person you ran into today?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAeVhv4vpMpQ
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"It's a long story, one that happened over the summer..." Reed didn't seem to go any further than that, but at least I could be assured that there was something personal about those two after all. I can't wait to find out what all I missed in my own absences, though before I could try to elaborate, Reed changed the subject quickly. "You know what? Now that I think about it, all of that weirdness I was having, with the girly sensation and the montrums, it all kind of faded away during that summer, even though it came back much later."113Please respect copyright.PENANAnBsnxcYExV
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So the purge was suppressed after all! Still, once something like that happens, a purge usually dies and fails. "I'm not surprised." It only makes perfect sense. When the environment of a human goes up with a purge in progress, that heat can suppress and pause the purge. However, when this happens for long enough, that excessive pause normally leads to a total failure. The purge does have an unspoken time limit it has to do its job in, its energy finite. "Actually, I am surprised that the purge survived that duration of heat." I've heard rumor before about purges that failed under those exact circumstances, only twice, which is why aggressor groups avoid places like Georgia and Texas as much as possible.113Please respect copyright.PENANATyTPqsqMB4
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"So heat can destroy a purge as well?"113Please respect copyright.PENANA0Dve6sjzL8
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I answered Reed's question with a boring repeated lecture that I had to learn from Saint, based on those two rumors, and I told him about how the purge can fail if suppressed by heat for a long enough time. As I explained it to him though, it made me question whether or not this summer break was the very reason for why the purge didn't do its job quite right, particularly on the information phase. Maybe, because the information is not a vital component to the completion of a purge, this is the only reason why it didn't fail in him, because the other phases kicked in first and protected the rest of the process. Maybe the only component to the purge which was messed up was the information phase. It sure would explain the hell out of some things.113Please respect copyright.PENANAEggh1qsPjZ
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"What happens if a purge fails?"113Please respect copyright.PENANACJYzEMDnHh
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"Then nothing happens. I mean, you literally just go back to being your old self, moving on with life as if nothing had ever happened. Yeah, the strange effects brought on by the purge would have still occurred, and the target would probably learn something about the Altiri, but without a completion to explain that those details all mean anything, the target would just dismiss it as random daydreams or something. If your purge had failed, all of the weirdness you had would have just been vague memory, and then I never would have met you. Since our ability loss from sending a purge is permanent, I would have totally wasted that for nothing in return."113Please respect copyright.PENANA5GetEUd5qj
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"The purge really survived all that time? I was free from its clutches during the summer, only for it to return to me in September."113Please respect copyright.PENANAloeWrQxuot
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So the purge resumed itself in September of 2010? That means there was still some time for more phases to complete, between then and the end of October. "It's not totally uncommon for a purge to survive a long duration of earthbound heat like that. But still, I'd say you are currently holding the new record for how long yours did manage to survive given how long that summer would have been." The record for the longest purge is about two years, but that particular purge had no significant summer heat issues like his did. Simply amazing! There were so many potential points of failure for my purge, yet it still succeeded anyway. "I'm as surprised as you. I received reports about the climate in that region from some of my other friends, and I feared the worse."113Please respect copyright.PENANAnyZiDteDDD
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It made me so glad that I was with Reed now, despite the fact that he still doesn't trust me. I'm responsible for all the strange things he did while purged; I cannot deny blame in that. As class went on for fifteen minutes, silent between us, it gave me more time to think about it, reaffirming my prior choice in letting Reed know everything there is to know about the Altiri. I'm going to have to trust him before he can trust me.113Please respect copyright.PENANAESPv8Sjx72
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Of course, the lesson I thought would be interesting was somehow more boring than times I've sat in the cockpit doing nothing at all. I thought learning something new would be interesting, but I had to hand it to this teacher for finding a way to make something to dull. Is this really what they teach kids these days? People don't learn well by citing pages of some moldy textbook.113Please respect copyright.PENANAnxsybcGNg0
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It was a rather long time of this, and I wanted to interrupt, but I instead chose to endure. If I interrupt him now, Reed will only get mad at me. I do intend to make sure he learns everything, but I need a better way to start over again. Yet before I knew it, Reed let his sudden agitation show, having hidden his pain from us both until now.113Please respect copyright.PENANAmCJlCubRMh
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"Okay, fine! You win. I can't take it anymore. If this guy wanted to get me to pay attention to every minute of this lecture, he should have made it more interesting."113Please respect copyright.PENANABqxqHZgAUT
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I found his phrasing curious, to say that 'I won,' as though I was putting him up to a challenge. I was simply giving us both time to think, but apparently he was trying to learn... I can't blame him for feeling this way; I wouldn't last a few minutes with that monotone lesson myself. Still, was he trying to bore me away intentionally, as if that would work? "You did that on purpose, didn't you?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAHL4ccxu4Se
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"I'll just figure the rest out later. I still have to get through my day somehow or another."113Please respect copyright.PENANATKRwpWQP30
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"When will you learn that it's rude to ignore a girl?"113Please respect copyright.PENANASWwnNKxsaJ
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"Maybe when you learn that invading my life was rude on its own premise... But whatever."113Please respect copyright.PENANAFMZ0c70NFD
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I sighed again, feeling as though I was brought back to square one. He isn't totally wrong. I did invade his life, in every aspect for that matter, but I did this for his own benefit, for this very reason! I've seen others suffer in similar ways he has, people who desperately need friends they can call their own, and who cry out for them in all sorts of ways, never getting what they need in return. Human nature is to require social interaction, but there are many who are more sensitive to this need than others. Reed has been this way too, so why must he try to kick out the only one who will care about him now? Is there something I'm not seeing?113Please respect copyright.PENANANEmmnt0XN0
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Bending myself into a knot wasn't helping, so I tried to just stay calm and be myself for now. Reed asked me some specifics about the purge process and how long it usually takes, with the shortest time being two weeks, and the average being about 9 months or so, give or take. That average changes each time there is a new purge, so who knows anymore? Not long after, Reed returned to a subject that I thought was previously closed.113Please respect copyright.PENANAOF1RfH8PF0
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"So about those who were purged..."113Please respect copyright.PENANA2O5f7dKnGF
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"You know I can't tell you their names or identities." I wasn't really happy to tell him that, knowing how badly he wants to meet the other ten, only to not be able to give him anything. "It's not that I don't want to, or that some law is stopping me from telling you. It's a matter of sharing what I do and don't know. The communication ban really makes it impossible to get exact details."113Please respect copyright.PENANAUHr0XxigmK
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"Then what about those who have already come to pass? Surely their information would not be classified as top secret anymore if they are not still alive to talk about it."113Please respect copyright.PENANAfSOWWFICMi
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Yeah, well Reed has a lot to learn about how my world works. The details of such people do get released, eventually, but only after 100-200 years, just to ensure no human of the next generation can dig up the info about it, and even then, sometimes that info is kept out much longer. It honestly isn't fair, this crazy game the Royal Scryers keep playing with all their secrets. However, I'm no longer in any position of weight to say anything about it. At this point, all of those scryers want my head on a plate. The queen wasn't exactly held in such great light with her decision to conditionally pardon us...113Please respect copyright.PENANALVUg0KNlkB
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When did we get to this point anyway? We used to be such a powerful and well-connected unity, but many of us keep being divided these days. Why does our involvement with ACS414 have to involve so many shields to truth and cover-ups? Why can't we work together as a whole unity and make these purges better? I wish somebody would answer these questions for me, because Reed isn't the only one with disdain to the prospect, even though he understands this much less than I do. "Their information eventually does get released to the Altiri public officially, but not until 100 years pass from their time of death, sometimes two hundred, sometimes longer."113Please respect copyright.PENANAbLMfWyNP8e
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"It sounds to me like this queen really wants to make sure two people on Earth purged at the same time cannot meet each other in person."113Please respect copyright.PENANA3zVW0gdIG0
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He's not wrong. What I've never understood was the reason for that policy. The queen has done everything she can to go out of her way in making sure two purged humans never-ever meet up together, even going as far as to try and prohibit these same humans from speaking the truth about us to others around them in their own world. I've asked Reed to keep all of this a secret, but not for the same reasons. There may come a day where he can find another human to trust this secret to, but I doubt he will find it in a school of immature teenagers. "I'm sorry Reed. That's just the way it is."113Please respect copyright.PENANAghvfv6E8ly
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"Right..."113Please respect copyright.PENANAczIMiP1k9L
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"I'm here for you too you know. Even though you don't believe I exist, I'm not lying when I tell you I'm doing this so that you can have at least one friend in life, one person to talk to..."113Please respect copyright.PENANAJQSZlZC8Qr
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Reed didn't respond to my offer though. He chose to ignore it entirely with silence and trance, about what - I don't know. He got a lot better in the last hour with silencing his own internal thought processes, as have I, but the situation didn't exactly put me at ease. His eye movements were so much slower now, his body slump and his arms lazy, indicative of an expression I've seen in him before from the clairvoyance. I can only wonder if his growing depression is that regarding friendship or something else, and for now, I didn't ask.113Please respect copyright.PENANAOBzolmWSOv
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He spoke up on his own eventually, asking once more about the purge, in the instance that it may fail, not only from physical failure, but rather from a rejection to the target node, a rejection to the aggressor group leader that purges them. I presumed from which, Reed wanted assurance that regardless of his faith in my existence, he still has to make the final choice by day's end, and I made sure he had such a choice.113Please respect copyright.PENANAWRs8EZI7J9
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Even though he cared not, I couldn't hide my worries and fears from him, about the idea that he may never call me back ever again after tonight. I wondered then if I should just quit and give up, despite fighting like hell to hang in there. Reed then changed the subject slightly to asking whether others such as parental figures found out about some of these people.113Please respect copyright.PENANABaYQFRW5GG
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I told him the truth, where it regarded the very few cases when it did happen. They weren't pretty stories. The mom and dad of any child who hears their own explain to them about Altiri aliens with telepathy, well, it isn't hard to imagine how that might look. Three times has it happened before, one leading to medications and later suicide, another leading directly to suicide and severance from the aggressor group, and a third instance leading to acceptance for the situation with a detachment from their family.113Please respect copyright.PENANA8h7RgBbWJf
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There is another reason why I want Reed to keep this to himself, and this is part of that reason. Those mental institution facilities they have are awful! They make certain prisons look like a day spa! I won't ever have him going into one of those facilities, ever. I'll give everything I am to make sure he doesn't wind up in that place, no matter what. If other humans around him find out, it would be bad, but if his parents discover this secret, it will be a total nightmare.113Please respect copyright.PENANAOawIypayRa
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Not long after I explained the stories of the others to him, Reed was quick to tighten a knot in his stomach, bringing about a new worry. "I'm sorry. That story was a little too graphic."113Please respect copyright.PENANABWoUVflFXy
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"It's fine," he replied. "I just had no idea that others who were purged could have it so rough. And here I was thinking I had the worst luck. But the truth is, I'm not special from everyone else."113Please respect copyright.PENANAZessacBVer
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Why does he always do that? For as long as I've known Reed, it didn't take anything to understand that he's always so hard on himself, but why does he keep thinking he's below average, that he isn't special? I know what I saw in him from day one, such incredible skill of the mind, such insight into the world and people around him. "To be fair, you are not that special to the Altiri world. However, you are special to us, to the Cy-Stars, and to me." My voice weakened to a broken whisper in my last admission. I knew I wasn't wrong; Reed really does mean everything to me, even if I have become too attached. I can't help it, but I won't be put down by these feeling either.113Please respect copyright.PENANAqLylVKmYxu
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"You and the Cy-Stars actually care about me. But what I can't understand is why..." His demands for answers had me in demands for the same questions. It isn't something I found easy to explain, even to myself. I've been attached to Reed for a while now; this much isn't news... But for some reason, every time I'm with him or think about him, everything just feels so intense! It doesn't make any sense, but it's also the only thing I want to focus on, the only thing I want to be real and true. "I'm only fourteen years old Lumina! Why does everyone get purged so young? Or am I a special case on that detail too?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAPkzaGnMZMs
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"There is a good reason," I stifled with some pause. I know the reason, but is it something I can really tell him? He won't seem to accept that I want to be a friend to him, or that I did this to prevent him from changing into a heathen. The truth is, my care for him is far greater than he'll ever know, even stronger than I thought it was, and I don't know why. Instead of telling him all in my heart, I diverted to a stupid technical answer instead, a truth within a deflection. "It mainly has to do with psionic potential and how close it is to one's peaking period. In the beginning, we knew far less about the purge and about psionics than we understand now. So the first patch of humans who were purged were fully fledged adults. What we ended up discovering more recently was the fact that purges put on a younger person are far more effective than one put on an older person. A person's psionic potential peaks at their age of adolescence, never before or after. Once that peaking period is over, their potential gradually gets weaker after they turn eighteen or nineteen."113Please respect copyright.PENANAaulOmaYb7N
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"So right now, because of my age, I'm considered to me at my peak telepathic condition?"113Please respect copyright.PENANANYXQYAVZOR
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"It's far more complicated than that. The peaking phase of a psionically active person can happen at any age during adolescence, but once someone passes the age of ten, they are physically capable of receiving a purge. So this peaking effect happens early on and gradually rises up to a point only to level off again later in life. I don't think you have hit your peaking period yet. Once you do, you will know it." The more I kept speaking on this, the worse this sensation in my stomach became, some strange sensation of gravity I couldn't familiarize myself to, with my breathing becoming heavier too. My answer to him might have been correct, but it was also total Hogwash. All I can think about in the background is talking to Reed, every single minute of every single day, as if I'm becoming addicted to the very idea of our communications.113Please respect copyright.PENANA2LtxmOY7az
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"Then explain to me what this weird buzzing feeling is in the back of my head. It's as if I can detect the energy we're using itself, which shouldn't be possible."113Please respect copyright.PENANAkqarmVBn8K
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"What you are feeling is the difference in psionic load handling between us."113Please respect copyright.PENANAWWoLFlNtRS
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"How much is there to this?"113Please respect copyright.PENANA5FIsgIOREi
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At the very least, I tried to focus on the technical aspects of psionics where I knew them best, going through my initial plan to teach Reed everything and nothing else. Talking about it began to calm me down, ever so slightly at least. "When two people like us are telepathically connected, we start sharing psionic energy between each other, which similarly shares the load of our mental energy as time goes by. At the present moment, you are actually handling far more psionic energy than you would normally be capable of on your own, but that's only because you are receiving a lot of that energy from myself at the same time through the connection. Even so, because humans have a much lower potential for psionic capabilities than Altiri even after a purge, I'm the one handling a much larger proportion of that psionic load. It's faster to just say that I'm the stronger node while you are the weaker node. Even so, we're transferring both energy and information at the same time at speeds far greater than any other energy source in the entire universe. So you might feel a slight buzz or some other weird sensation, but all it really does is prove to you that you and I are connected to each other with this powerful sixth sense."113Please respect copyright.PENANAmBddSfruDL
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"So, I'm guessing when it comes to telepathy between one human and another human..."113Please respect copyright.PENANAFhzxrkSFCC
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"It isn't physically possible. The energy requirements for telepathy are just that high. Since Altiri people far exceed the minimum requirements, it gives us the ability to use telepathy with other Altiri without effort. When it comes to us and another human, we still need an extra push, that being the purge. But even if two humans who were already purged tried to use telepathy between each other, it would never-ever work. All humans just don't have the minimum mental energy and psionic potential to make that happen no matter how much training is given." The actual psionic load in our connection averages in such a way where 60% of the load is on me and 40% of the load is on him. This combination has the best connection stability and energy maintenance rate. I doubt he will understand this though.
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Chapter Theme Shift: Moonlight Trails ~ VPG (Wind of Spring)
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Reed and I sat in silence then, letting another solid minute go by, his thoughts his own, and my thoughts mine. Every minute passing was another test of my own patience, wishing I could finally convince him to keep me around, but I knew I had no grounds to argue right now. Despite our telepathic link, our minds were still so far apart, so unreachable.113Please respect copyright.PENANA8iOKYhBSWQ
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Reed then went for his bag, rummaging around until he opened a notebook of sketches, turning the pages until he landed on a particular section that stood out from the rest. Even from a quick glance, I knew what that marking was in the notebook, the triangle of our allegiance. "Ah. I see that got to you too." At least the purge was good for something, though this is always something they do so early in.113Please respect copyright.PENANAT7QlnRngJ7
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"What, all of these triangles? I remember obsessing over getting the exact measurements right, and eventually I did."113Please respect copyright.PENANAJX9zWasAM2
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"That's the eye of The Unity; the symbol of the Altiri." I wore the emblem proudly, right on the top of my right and left hand, using branding technology with permanent glowing ink, marking myself with the tattoo willingly, even though it was installed so long ago.113Please respect copyright.PENANAO4RypqVRva
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"I remember being obsessed with this thing for the longest time. Did the purge do that too?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAicZyqYeOby
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"Yes. The purge can manifest in different ways depending on who gets purged, but every single person who does becomes obsessed with drawing that symbol."113Please respect copyright.PENANA7AkRkJ2uxP
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"Was there ever a time where your experiments didn't work out the way they expected?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAJQ0qEeSRyw
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I wish he would quit referring to these purges as experiments. The queen may see them as a tool, and the Royal Scryers see them as experimental processes, but this isn't about some scientific endeavor, not for me Reed, never. Still, I told him all about the few times such things have gone wrong, aside from the already mentioned rejections from humans. There was one time the heavy administration allowed for three aggressor groups to purge the same target all at once. The purge failed of course, but phase five did activate within this supposed human, of which, most significantly, our music was leaked through, with some of our influence as well.113Please respect copyright.PENANAdvlp7vQeuq
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The specifics of our conversations were a bit long winded, but I had to make them so, since he had such a hard time understanding them otherwise. Still, I realized then that I was at least getting a little bit further with him every step of the way. Reed is beginning to ask some questions on his own now, his curiosity of our world rising. I'd rather not rely on the temptation of montrum to get on his good side, but if that's the way he wants to pursue everything, I won't stop him either.113Please respect copyright.PENANAs0EedthoI9
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Eventually, the class bell rang, which turned out to be a signal for all students to transition from one type of class structure to the next. Reed made short comment before getting up to move out, until he was in his second class of the day, math. "I feel like I've just about heard it all. But somehow, I just know I haven't."
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<11/01/149,566 {Avion 148} - 09:05 | Corral Position, Genosis, Altiri Sector Space>113Please respect copyright.PENANAmRcgCrrHMo
<Karnak to ACS414 Date Equivalent: 11/01/2010>113Please respect copyright.PENANAzMYwJLHKPm
<Telepathic Link: Established | Telepathic Strength: Moderate ~ {45oN}>
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By the time math begun, the both of us were a little more anxious than before, with Reed full of mental energy from the awakening of his new mind, and me from the uncertainty in all I've yet to achieve. Despite our rapid minds, Reed still managed to display such humbleness in his relaxed state, as he took an empty seat to the middle of the classroom, letting his eyes drift around towards a certain corner.113Please respect copyright.PENANAHZvAYj1Vre
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"So tell me more about this Malica chick."113Please respect copyright.PENANAEgc5SLI3M0
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Reed let out an annoyed sigh before addressing my random topic. "Here I thought we could have a nice and peaceful silent hour of math, but you keep killing the mood."113Please respect copyright.PENANAe9QrfpSEK8
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The fact that it can kill his mood says a lot on its face. I don't know anything about Malica, aside from a single mention to that name when Reed was telling that other girl off earlier. Whoever the person was must have been a friend of Malica, and thereby an enemy for Reed by shared association. Of course, I'm in the dark about this, and should ask more before helping him with this. Also, I'm a little curious, because I happen to have a friend in the Stryders with the same name. "I just want to know what happened. I got the impression that she ticked you off somehow." Just by reminding him about her name, I felt Reed's wrist tighten, as if he might punch a hole into the desk.113Please respect copyright.PENANA443LUPeEUb
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"Fine, I'll start from the beginning."113Please respect copyright.PENANAjsm2GppfRK
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"Go ahead." I was more than willing to wait and hear all about this story, but I changed my position around in the meantime, going from the main room to the cockpit, so that I may take a seat, nodding to Junko that she's doing an amazing job. I might be able to help her run the subsystems check once more while passively listening to Reed, if I can divide my focus properly.113Please respect copyright.PENANAGDVby59QRv
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"It was last summer. Malica was always a cute one, but one day, she asked me out, and I said yes."113Please respect copyright.PENANAA3oQX5UV3g
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"Awwwwwh! That's so cute!" I didn't know Reed managed to find time for dating... Wait a minute, that's really a bigger deal than it sounds. Reed, as shy as he is went out with someone?!113Please respect copyright.PENANAjnpXeA75BE
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"Shut up," he retorted without anger. "We went out during summer. But for the most part, it was just cell phone communication."113Please respect copyright.PENANADSgINyhTOz
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Without knowing why, the words just slipped out of me, my tone fake to emphasize the blessing of his achievements. "She asked you out?" It's a good thing. Reed having anyone ask him out is rare, only because he doesn't talk to people often enough.113Please respect copyright.PENANAnlZYDN8M8a
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"Why does that surprise you?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAxppuo6OFes
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At last, I regained some of my seriousness, reminding him of his own personality flaws. "I don't know Reed. You were the one who kept telling yourself how unpopular you are. You even tried to tell me you were a loser. So I guess I am just a little surprised that something came up to negate your pessimism."113Please respect copyright.PENANAt2xiRqbD0D
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"Well... Maybe the whole girly phase I went through wasn't for the worst." Wait, what? "It did make me more interesting to some of the girls I sat with, at least for a while. I'm beginning to think that was the sole reason I popped up on anyone's radar in the first place."113Please respect copyright.PENANAYeCyL8QehU
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No, that's not how it works... It can't be the reason she asked Reed out. Then again, I don't know this Malica at all; maybe she's only into femboys. "I don't know if it was really for the best. After all, you two didn't stay together."113Please respect copyright.PENANActZQSE4Yo2
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"Tsk! After we broke up, I just became a walking cliché. I went a little overboard and reacted too much, but I really was upset." I can only imagine, but I'm sure it isn't difficult to envision how that must have looked. I've seen enough breakups happen through clairvoyance to know how bitter people are to each other afterwards. Going back to platonic friendship usually doesn't happen, and it's always the reason broken couples avoid each other so much right after. "But what happened? She just decided to give it up?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAYO0uOt0gvi
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"She cheated on me with another guy." Reed paused after his first statement, only to allow the news to sink in more. "Still think she is cute now?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAZtQTs6iVB6
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I couldn't respond immediately, since a lot went through my mind at once. She cheated on him? I know they were dating, but Reed is still very young, and I would imagine Malica to be even younger. What does cheating in an underdeveloped relationship even look like? I have to ask for my own sake. "How far did you two take this relationship?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAZs6NuhrM5t
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I could feel already that my wording slightly offended him, which means I was getting the wrong idea already, thankfully. "We didn't even hold hands that often. We just talked with each other a lot. I never kissed her, not because I didn't want to. I'm just not very good with that kind of stuff. Besides, she's younger than I am, so I didn't want to be an ass about it."113Please respect copyright.PENANAJu07y3WWcK
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"Hoooooh." It's an honorable enough reason. So often do heathens prioritize their sexual advances onto other woman, be it something as simple as kissing or something more complicated. I knew Reed was the gentleman I trusted him to be.113Please respect copyright.PENANAPJfdXkrqtL
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"But now, I'm really glad that I didn't go any further. My mind was starting to go there towards the end."113Please respect copyright.PENANAk7dh4L8JBn
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I suddenly feel bad for asking about this. A lot of repressed depression began to wash over me as he kept talking about her, the breakup phase clearly far from over... I've never been in the position before, so this time, I wouldn't know how to help him with something like this. "Okay," I confirmed. "So she dumped you for someone else more attractive?" It's mostly the reason why women on Earth cheat, I think.113Please respect copyright.PENANAB1ly7kJeDT
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"Not even!" he disclaimed, offended at the very thought. "He's uglier in my opinion..." Such rage fueled his insult as he tried to correct me, and I wasn't about to say any more, but a few seconds after, that hatred faded away very quickly. "That was mean. I shouldn't talk like that."113Please respect copyright.PENANArGmsKGQjCo
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Why stop there? He should really stop putting himself down like that. "I mean, the truth is the truth, right?" I mean, if he's going to be upset about something, isn't it better to stay upset about the issue until it is resolved? That's how most conflicts get resolved anyway. Instead, he's choosing to ignore the issue entirely and just stay all by himself. He's sitting alone, speaking to nobody at all. He should be stronger than that. "It's only a first though. Breakups like that happen far more often than you think."113Please respect copyright.PENANAnlcYEAQMuj
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"Thanks, but that doesn't really put me at ease."113Please respect copyright.PENANAkMUfB1OixE
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"Have you told Malica how you felt when she hurt you like this?" At least tell me he did say something.113Please respect copyright.PENANAyUq8S6Ya8A
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"Of course I did, but I also didn't have to. She knew what she did; everyone knew what she did. When she had first asked me out, I was so stoked that anyone had taken any interest in me at all, but I didn't know all she wanted to do was use me for her own personal sanity. She leeched off me and then threw the same - if not more attention onto somebody else."113Please respect copyright.PENANAtHmWmI7MiV
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It was crazy enough to hear how that all started. One of those details stuck into me in particular, the bit about Reed only being interested for the sake of having someone's romantic attention in the first place. That isn't how it's supposed to work, is it? It doesn't feel quite right to me, but I can hardly blame him. As for the cheating part, well, that happens all the time, on both sides of the gender. "So, who was that other chick that you bumped into today?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAEYhplQL4oS
113Please respect copyright.PENANAbXUYpQKlyj
"That would be Banarus." At last, I have a name for that cute face he told off earlier. Banarus is her name... "I actually enjoy hanging out with her. She's cute and funny..." Already? Is Reed crushing on another girl this soon after a breakup? How is Banarus funny exactly? I'd like to know! "No, not in that way. I mean, she isn't my type, so I don't think of her like that. You know what I mean." My rapid pulse calmed just a little upon hearing that, and I tried again to ignore the strange challenge I had today of keeping myself calm inside.113Please respect copyright.PENANAA4nsKz7OdB
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Still, how can he say anything nice about someone after being so cold to her this morning? It couldn't have been from hitting pavement! "Could have fooled me earlier. It really sounded like she wanted to get you to sit with her in class today."113Please respect copyright.PENANAazbKWlhUak
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"That's because, in the past, I used to hang out with her a lot. But Banarus is Malica's best friend right now. So, I can't associate with either of them."113Please respect copyright.PENANAazJVDwR90a
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Now I feel bad for Banarus. That isn't right. "Don't you think that's a little unfair to Banarus?" See the good in this Reed. Surely you can't fault one person for the mistake of another.113Please respect copyright.PENANAP3g1By099T
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"No, not really. She has bad taste in friends. That's on her, not me."113Please respect copyright.PENANAHSWwoY9dfN
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I was now beginning to understand an unseen barrier to Reed's biggest problem I failed to notice earlier. His difficulty in making friends is not 100% allocated to him being an unlikable person. The fact that he can say that about Banarus at all means he has much more to learn about friendship before he's ever going to get anywhere. He might be insightful, but it doesn't mean he is currently knowledgeable or mature.113Please respect copyright.PENANAlcCw2feM2p
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Luckily, I can try to change that. I think I already know how, with the center of our vision so tightly focused and centered on a particular individual, one sitting in a desk right next to the familiar Banarus I spotted earlier. "Wait! That is her, isn't it?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAB8rz38SaoP
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"What?" I caught Reed off guard, having him realize too late that I could easily see the center of his visual perception without effort, and since I already knew Banarus's appearance, singling out Malica wasn't so difficult. "Yeah, so what if it is?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAKHaNRzpFzi
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Target sighted! I knew now what I must do. Reed has to learn that friendships aren't always about picking sides between one person and another, and the only way he can learn that is to jump right in. I can't convince him to apologize to Banarus, but if all she wants if for Reed to rejoin their little group, I can help with that. "Reed..."113Please respect copyright.PENANA0fkyJfKuN5
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"What now? I told you already that she made her own bed."113Please respect copyright.PENANANsWZ3siPfk
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"Forget about that. Is Malica in the same class that we are in right now?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAc7zqK4Y7Gb
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"Yes, she is."113Please respect copyright.PENANAk9Ww5QDHal
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"What is she even like?" I suspected the one by Banarus already, but I wanted to avoid making any mistakes for this, so I waited to drag this out of Reed's old soul. Without saying a word, Reed drifted his eyes onto her, so that I may see with full confirmation. "That's her?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAKnUSBwCsTt
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"The same bitch who broke my heart."113Please respect copyright.PENANAITosdUrpXl
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So he curses too... I wondered if Reed would ever adopt the microchasm of so called swear words, and clearly he has, not that I would mind... Wait, she's only that tall?! "Haha! She's so tiny!"113Please respect copyright.PENANAtiQpjxbZzq
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"Egh?!"113Please respect copyright.PENANA2k7wtcWI5v
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I nearly punched myself in in the chest to punish myself for being stupid. I can't just make random outbursts like that. I have to be the cool one here. "Come on, go over there," I pointed with my arm.113Please respect copyright.PENANABEjomtX4Pk
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"And what, introduce you, my invisible hallucination? No thanks. I'm socially awkward enough as it is. I want nothing to do with her anymore."113Please respect copyright.PENANAVjdeeYpTKf
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Malica isn't the one he needs to make things up to. Besides, he clearly isn't over her at all. If he was, going over there wouldn't be a problem in the first place. This only makes going over there more important. "I get that, but I want to get a better look at the bitch who hurt your feelings."113Please respect copyright.PENANAPbqceG9gZn
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While I thought trying to reassure him would work, Reed returned with a telepathic shift of his own voice, now mimicking the tone of a weird robot. "Access denied."113Please respect copyright.PENANACrMrcmpzR0
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Really? If that's how he wants to play, I'll show him just how annoying I can be. It might not feel right for him to be pushed into this by me, but I need Reed to trust me, and for him to get over something that has no meaning in the first place. "I have other ways I can find out, one of which involves a little torture."113Please respect copyright.PENANANaqVBktxWA
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"You wouldn't and couldn't."113Please respect copyright.PENANAPRY9NcFg06
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Never try me Reed, only will you find out. "All I have to do is nag you all day long, as you desperately try to focus on the dreaded school work." Changing my tone to a more dramatic one, I turned Reed's new trick against him, realizing how easy it was to alter the tone and sonic texture of telepathic sound. "Ringing in your ears for all eternity shall be her name engraved in my whispers... Malica... Malica... Malica..."113Please respect copyright.PENANAAaCI69Zmn8
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"Alright already!" Reed jumped out of his seat rather aggressively, failing to stifle the reaction I inflicted on him. It wasn't pretty, but at least he was forcing himself to do what I asked. He wasn't quick about this at all, but without too much time, he walked over to their group, hands firm with too many emotions at once to make out anything clear.113Please respect copyright.PENANASypbfgto55
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By the time he reached their area, Reed sat in an open desk set meant for him all this time, attracting the surprised attention of the others, though Reed seemed indifferent. "You know what Banarus? Whatever today... Whaaaaaaaaatever."113Please respect copyright.PENANA5bFqunLf9Y
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"You're sitting with us now?" Banarus sounded surprised, but her reaction was mainly based off the way Reed spoke to her this morning. As I kept quiet, I could hear some of his internal thoughts again, directed only at himself.113Please respect copyright.PENANAD9tpJYLqeU
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I wonder what they would think of this situation, if they really knew what was going on with me right now. The panic! The freak show inside my head! The hallucination of a lifetime! Would any of them even get it? Would either one of them care at all?113Please respect copyright.PENANAdvbt1l3sig
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"Wait, does this mean—"113Please respect copyright.PENANAFBuRT1Y6yR
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"The hell it does not!" Reed cut off his ex instantly, shutting down that failed assumption before it could even be voiced. "If it were up to me, I'd be just fine talking to Banarus and pretending that you don't even exist."113Please respect copyright.PENANAbbr9RX9QrB
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I didn't say anything, choosing to watch in silence instead, but this was already going in the direction I wanted it to. Reed is talking to Malica again, and even though it is hostile, it's better than saying nothing at all, so that she might one day learn better of her own mistakes. I knew Reed could do it!113Please respect copyright.PENANAJBmLz3gcqB
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"Wow," I nodded disdainfully. "She actually thinks she has another shot to win you back. But naturally, you are smart enough not to fall for it."113Please respect copyright.PENANA53B7CxLhpI
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"What do you take me for Lumina?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAqYgkqs6lt4
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Banarus tilted her confused face at us, repeating what Reed said as a question. "If it were up to you?"113Please respect copyright.PENANA6M4ymVHfs0
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Uh oh! "What did we say about filtering our words carefully?" We can't afford to have other students be suspicious of us right now, especially given Reed's lack of faith in the Altiri. I already overheard his thoughts about wondering how they would take this news. I know he wants to know, but I can already see how it would end, and I don't want to put him through that kind of pain. Having them learn of the truth by accident would be even worse.113Please respect copyright.PENANA40OotBldh6
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"Yeah, shut up. I got this..." "It's nothing, don't worry about it." That's it; that's all Reed had to say for himself. Oddly, though Banarus tilted her head slightly, she and Malica both ignored the rest of it, as if it never happened... I thought those two wouldn't be as dense.113Please respect copyright.PENANA3jlhzHX565
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Of course, Reed wasn't finished speaking just yet, and the words that left him next were interesting to my ears. "Today is a strange day for me, but it's high time I stopped being a moron... Malica? I am now completely and totally over you. So please, quit thinking that you have a second chance with me, cause it's not going to happen."113Please respect copyright.PENANAUz0PIO9UI3
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Malica jumped up from her seat in protest, trying to reassure us that we had the wrong idea. "I wasn't thinking that!"113Please respect copyright.PENANAtTnOQ50Az2
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"Liar. I can see the regret on her face. She just wants to grab the people she can't get easily." What Reed said just now, that he was being a moron about the very situation I was trying to resolve, it made me wonder if he really thought about himself that way. Is his self-esteem so damaged by everything that he can only look at himself like some kind of idiot? Forget the trust in me; where's the trust in himself? Where's that confidence that he used to have? Where is that happy silliness he used to exude on the regular? Reed might still be the same Reed I know, but he's already turned into a total pessimist. Yeah, he was being stupid about Banarus, but most people his age would do the same; it doesn't mean he is actually an idiot. But I don't know how to get him to understand that. I know simply telling him the opposite won't work, not with his current attitude.113Please respect copyright.PENANAl1EZn5D6g2
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"She's Kenzaki's problem now, not mine."113Please respect copyright.PENANAtXgrbogyw0
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Banarus broke the awkward silence between everyone, trying to move the situation along. "At least now you're moving on, and your sitting with us today! What more fun can you ask for?"113Please respect copyright.PENANANVo2v3rIFy
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"Is she fun to be around?" Without thinking, I simply blurted my thought loudly, revealing how skeptical I sounded about the claim.113Please respect copyright.PENANAhCsYF1MIiL
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Reed told me, in several long sentences that neither of the two were really that fun, and that he only hung out with them because they were still the most interesting or funniest merely by comparison to the remainder of the dull student body. It was a sad story to hear, but I understood exactly how he was seeing these other people. Though I wasn't sure if I could easily agree to the perceptions he was making about others, I also had no reason to entirely doubt them either.113Please respect copyright.PENANAJTFSQwrlOs
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Look at it from my angle. Reed is one of the shiest teenagers here. He's gotten a lot better already at talking to people if it isn't too random, though this was mostly only thanks to some insanities from the purge. That aside, why is he the one making the effort? I saw this before when he was in fifth grade. Reed always tried, going out of his way to talk to other people, but with too rare exceptions, nobody went out of their way to talk to him, not even a little. One of those stupid heathens tried to convert him, but he resisted, thankfully. The point is, is he really wrong to call everybody in the classroom dull and boring when the same people never bother to do anything besides gossip or trash talk, about anything beyond sports, fashion, or television? I am certain that Reed has a right to prioritize his efforts in certain directions, because friendship is a two-way street; it can never be given one-sided.113Please respect copyright.PENANAhd2LyPf3x9
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Banarus and Malica might be ever so slightly the outliers of the normal for school life, but it doesn't guarantee they are good people, and even if they were, it also doesn't mean they will be kind to Reed or extend their hands out to him; Malica won't because she already broke his heart, and Banarus... Well, she's an unknown for now, which is better than a lost cause.113Please respect copyright.PENANAWWTwXKacP4
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"You know, for what it's worth, you do have me to talk to now. I'm really here for you Reed."113Please respect copyright.PENANAJZZ91vUKKQ
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"I meant someone who— Oh, never mind."113Please respect copyright.PENANAvw94EDubEh
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I wasn't thrilled to still be rejected the reality I deserved, but how could I really fight it? I can't force him to believe that I exist, nor can I force him to accept all of this. Even so, I'm not going to stop trying. I'll be by your side Reed, even if you won't want me around. You don't have to try with me; I'm going to be here for you no matter what happens, whenever you need me...113Please respect copyright.PENANAyJyZQW3WeX
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Can he feel my thoughts now, as they melt into the slow, cold rush of blood pumping through my blue veins? Will Reed ever accept my company, even though I'm an alien, or to him, a hallucination? The expanding nexus of my own mess caught some of my words in frozen stasis, causing me to stutter every so often for the first time of my life. All I felt somehow became more intense and less identifiable at the same time, a sea of chaos replacing every breath, though I kept being brave, forcing myself to stay and keep having these conversations with Reed.113Please respect copyright.PENANAcnkb3eWH0z
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As he swiftly ignored the two, sticking with the interests of my world, he asked more about the specifics of our species, including some of the technology, lack of illness, quite a lot in fact. However, once we eventually wound up onto the subject of Zinod, some painful memories started to return to me, which was distraction enough in whatever kept bubbling up from within. "Once upon a time, we did have access to it resources. But, Zinod was unfortunately destroyed."113Please respect copyright.PENANAjBi9ab5UqE
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"D—destroyed?!" Reed stuttered; just anyone would from hearing about something to powerful. "Wh— We are talking about a whole planet, right?"113Please respect copyright.PENANAvbeZt865Q4
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"Well technically, Zinod was more of a moon to Karnak. Despite being close to the same size, Zinod was still a smaller planet... I know you're curious about what would take out something so big and important. It's actually part of that long story I wanted to talk to you about, about the worst bit in our own history."113Please respect copyright.PENANA7wysOvvJM5
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Reed took time to mull it over again, deciding on something I wasn't sure of, until he took some breaths and called out his next plan. "Well, math is going to be over soon. All of my next classes including the lunch period is going to me too busy for us to talk more about anything. But I know I will have plenty of free time to pick this up in Gym, and more time after that in my music class. So let's wait until Gym and talk about it there. Besides, I could use a short break after this."113Please respect copyright.PENANA9v3RlFOAJ9
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"Okay." I agreed to the wait, but I wasn't looking forward to holding all of this in for more than another hour. I also have to wonder how he will see us, once he learns of the Altiri history.113Please respect copyright.PENANAvjcxK9bOzr
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I know how some guys tend to think. What happened in our world was awful no matter how anyone wants to slice it. It doesn't change the fact that the crazy war we had against one person trying to build some kind of cult, was all started by that man's insane ego. I've of course never told any human the story before, not yet, though I have imagined and simulated the conversion several times before, including telling the story to another male.113Please respect copyright.PENANAHM6hRgIf2O
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How many men would side with Legasso, I wonder? Even though he helped build up our people for a long time, he one day turned his attention on the elements of total control of our entire species, showing more of his evil side if ever anyone dared to challenge him, until it reached a point where Legasso saw himself as a god, and us as useless creatures.113Please respect copyright.PENANAJSYDeE8gC0
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What he did was plain wrong, and we reacted too slowly to prevent so many deaths from his reign. I know many males from the human world would look at us Altiri, and judge us horribly for our associations between Legasso's personality and that of the more masculine bunch of men. If I were there in person, just once, I'd want to ask one of these heathens, if they really think that what Legasso did was justifiable, if he could be allowed to live, after he separated all of our mothers, destroyed many relationships, enslaved so many, enacted brutality and brainwashing on us, and blasted an entire world to hell just to regain social control of the very people he hated so much. I simply wonder, if men would defend their own, knowing of such evils, or if they would condemn an offender to the ends of torment.113Please respect copyright.PENANAKwSCt3LpAU
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I don't think my associations are wrong, and neither does the whole of The Unity. Of course, I don't really have a direct way to ask this question to a heathen. I've already seen enough of this world anyway with my clairvoyance to be able to guess the truth already. I have every right to hate that murderer for what he did to us, to all of us, and I'll never be told that I'm wrong to feel this way, not by anybody, not even by Reed.
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