I've been let off with a warning. The major thoroughly wrung me out for the better part of an hour over one minor slip-up—the nerve. He said that if there's another "incident", I'll be removed from the team's active roster and either placed on administrative duty or expelled. Honestly, I cannot decide which is worse.
They might call it "administrative", but I believe the other term I've heard tossed around for it; "housekeeping", is far more accurate. To think... me of all people reduced to cleaning uniforms and tidying the academy grounds. I could never lower myself so far as to be complacent in such a position.
I say that, but the alternative might as well be tantamount to death. If I was to return, Mother would certainly meet me with a wicked punishment... not that I wish to see her again, regardless. I made the decision to leave and it's a decision that I do not regret. To come crawling back to mother on my belly might truly be worse than doing laundry for commoners.
Though, even mother's wrath might be preferable to being caught by
What am I going on about? Reading my thoughts back to myself, it's as if I've already consigned myself to further reprimand. Could it be that, deep down, I know it's unavoidable? Perhaps I sound unreasonable, but I simply cannot allow myself to fall in line with the rabble and be treated as just another peon. I know that I'm better than the others. I have to be.
Given the proper environment and opportunity, I would surely flourish and stand amongst the academy's greatest achievers. Yet, here I am, held back by the company of a foreigner with no future and a supposed "prodigy" who has already begun to overshadow me on our third day. Being locked in close proximity to the Hurricane's son guarantees that, even if I distinguish myself as a candidate, I'll only ever be able to share the spotlight at best.
If that monster doesn't get its hands on me first.
Listen to me... I've been raised to be the embodiment of confidence and I'm already having doubts. Still, it's hard not to when I've lost two battles in two days. Being defeated by the foreigner was bad enough, but a street urchin?
No, I can't fault myself. Arthur should have covered me better. Then again, perhaps I stood too close? Ridiculous. Just another example of my teammate's shortcomings placing me in a position where I'm unable to properly shine.
Thinking back, the way that entire encounter occurred was bizarre. How did Captain Scharf know that the degenerate would snatch Arthur's wallet? And the thief just happened to be an exceptional? I refuse to accept such an absurdity as pure coincidence. The captain knew his name. Max, I think it was? The captain had his identification and said he took it "the last time he tried that stunt". That means that he likely already knew the thief was an exceptional and he dragged us into that situation without warning us.
Taking the time to consider what that freak was capable of, I could have been killed. Truly, what type of monster was he? Claws that grew from his wrists and could be replaced just as quickly as they were discarded... a nightmarish power, indeed. Even stranger, he had blue blood! Can a creature so alien even be considered human? Had that beast aimed just the slightest bit higher, he might have slit my throat instead of simply breaking my violin.
What if he's the murderer?
My violin...
Captain Scharf says the academy will replace it. Is it strange to say that I might have had a sentimental attachment to that violin? It was my sister's. Mother wouldn't allow me my own, since I discovered my ability and expressed my interest in becoming an Iron Knight. I wonder if Marigold is upset with me for taking it? Well, unlike me, she doesn't have to take such extreme actions to avoid being married off to some Tommy fop I've never even laid eyes on. Not that seeing someone would matter to Marigold, given her condition. But it's that very condition that saved her from my fate! Truly, she's luckier than she will ever realize.
I do feel the slightest speck of shame for having Marigold's violin broken under my possession. Weak as it might sound, it reminded me of her and provided me with a modicum of comfort in this new world. I couldn't carry every little piece back, but I did save one. I don't think anyone saw me slide it into my pocket. At least, I hope they didn't. The last thing I need is these fools thinking I'm broken up over a simple object.
LOOK HERE -> I've folded the corner of this page to remind myself to buy Marigold the finest violin in all the continent once I've taken my place as a renowned Iron Knight. DO NOT FORGET.
Even now I feel that someone is watching me. I cannot tell anyone or I'll prove myself to be a liability. I must not validate
I know that I shouldn't leave room for failure, but the thought just crossed my mind...
In the event of my ejection from the academy
Magnolia paused, her hand trembling as she clutched pen over paper. Strained by her own consideration of a drastic alternative, she couldn't bring herself to ink the next words. Finding herself unable to continue, she closed her diary and fell back onto her bed with a defeated sigh.
I'm rambling to myself like a fool. I can't even remember half of what I just wrote. Magnolia thought to herself.
She closed her eyes for a moment but quickly became too anxious to rest. Sitting back up, Magnolia crossed her arms and rubbed her shoulders.
I can't let them know I'm scared.
ns 15.158.61.20da2
