Looking back at their friendship in retrospect, it’s really no surprise that so many people assumed they were a couple so often. They were each other’s closest person. The confidant, the mentor, the shoulder-to-lean-on, the one that you could call and they’d pick up the phone no matter what was going on: more than a best friend could ever wish to be. Opposites on the outside, but so similar inside.
Everyone thought Giovanni was the man of the hour, but the truth was he stayed on the verge of a breakdown. The only person that ever knew that and knew the real him was Tate. Crammed for a test and failed it due to his nerves? He’d go to Tate. Slammed hard to the ground during a football game which caused them to lose? Tate was always right there. Wanted to skip out on a big social party that his parents were throwing for donors? Straight to the rooftop of Tate’s apartment building where they’d hide out together. He went to Tate with every problem, every achievement, and every idle moment that he just didn’t want to spend alone. They were inseparable.
It was similar for Tate. Everyone assumed he was the quiet, weird kid that always wore the same clothes to school because his family was too poor to afford new ones. Sometimes he’d get mouthy and then he’d get punched, but he almost never defended himself with his fists. The truth was that, when away from everyone else, Tate lit up. He laughed loudly, loved his life despite the hand he’d been dealt, and cared deeply for people. Where Gio fell short, Tate thrived. Enough confidence to dance around and not care what anyone thought of him. Enough self worth to tell someone who treated him badly to fuck off. He brought out the fun side of Gio, the side that didn’t worry about being cautious every step. The real side, not his Capitani façade. Away from each other they were two entirely different people, the sides of them that everyone else was allowed to see.
Sometimes, when they were spending time together, they could just sit in silence. Not having to stress about their lives outside of their little bubble. Tate would draw and Gio would write music that he’d never get to play. It could go on like that for hours. Holed up on a rooftop or locked away inside Gio’s bedroom. The only place that Tate didn’t have to be a father to his siblings at fifteen, worried about how he was going to cover rent for that month when he refused to accept help from anyone. The only place that Gio didn’t have to worry about being the perfect son, or the greatest quarterback the school ever had when he didn’t even want to play any sports.
Sometimes, when it was just the two of them, they’d put on any song and turn it up all the way just to dance. They did it after Gio’s fifteenth birthday, once they finally managed to get away from the huge party his parents thought he wanted. Climbed up scaffolding with a tiny stereo and danced until neither of them could anymore, and then they watched the sun come up together. That was the first time that Gio felt like he was floating. Dancing around Tate, watching as he pretended to have a microphone and sang along to every song in perfect pitch. That floating feeling began happening far more often after that, but Gio had always been pretty oblivious to the way he felt.
It happened again when he caught Tate staring at him while he was trying to play a video game. He’d realized that he’d become the subject for all of Tate’s art studies lately. Sketches of him filled most of the sketchpad that he’d bought Tate as an early birthday present. Eventually those graduated to full blown portraits — realistic ones that Gio would frame. People at school teased Tate for always staring at Gio, but it didn’t stop him from spending all of his free time in class drawing. They both had similar talents when it came to music, but Tate actively pursued his while Gio just silently wrote songs for his friend that would never hear them. That led to another time he felt that floating feeling, listening to Tate play the guitar Gio’s uncle had gifted him and sing something that Gio had written.
After that it came from simple interactions. When they’d hold hands while walking together on the busy streets or when they’d wrestle each other. Tate would almost always come out victorious because he had more martial arts training than Gio could hope for back then. Wrapping their arms around each other's shoulders and purposely squeezing too tight. During the summer when they’d meet in the meadow that their parents would take them to as kids and have their yearly picnic. That feeling kept happening even after Pippa came into the picture. That’s when their arguments began, but it was usually due to the fact one was too dense to realize he’d messed up and the other was too stubborn to voice he’d been hurt by something. It never made the floating feeling fully stop, but it happened less. Sometimes, when Tate would stick around after a football game even though they hadn’t made up from a fight they’d had, that feeling would drown out everything else.
Their split hurt worse than the heartbreak Gio would feel from Pippa rejecting his marriage proposal. They hadn’t just lost a friend in each other… they’d both lost their other half. Tate became closed off; he no longer put on the quiet guy that simply had a disdain for everyone façade. He was hard to be around, usually, and would punch someone in the face if they pushed too much. Gio had thrown himself so hard into trying to be perfect that it’d caused him to lose everyone that cared about the real him. Capitani had gotten the girl, the college scholarship, the scouts from the NFL, and then had lost it all in one blink.
In the end they’d both just been kids with too much on their plates. Bound to disappoint each other because neither really knew who they were yet. One hopelessly in love and the other just hopeless, but it hadn’t been Tate admitting his feelings that had caused the fight that ended it all. It’d been Gio breaking his trust for the final time. It didn’t stop that floating feeling whenever Gio saw his former best friend, but it took a few years before Gio himself ever realized what that feeling was.
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There's so much someone who knows Tate Crawford could say about him. Usually people throw out negative words in reference to him, but to Giovanni? He'd always been like complex geometry that's made up by the golden ratio. He had never really felt unsafe a day in his life, but he was the safest space Gio always had. Tate always understood. What Gio was feeling, what he was doing, and what he meant. They could talk for hours and say nothing at all, but still be content just in each other's presence.
He often overthinks when he looks back at their former friendship. Seeing all the things he should have done differently. It's amazing how utterly oblivious someone can be, but that's always been Giovanni. Blind to the fact his own best friend was hiding how he felt about him for years. Blind to the fact that he’d actually been hurting him without even realizing it. Blind to even his own feelings because he was so confused internally and stuck trying to be perfect that Gio forgot what was really important to him. Do you know what took Gio finally getting that Tate even had a crush on him? Tate had to kiss the boy.
Gio wasn't stupid, he knew how badly Tate was treated. The only girl he'd ever really liked wound up being the biggest school bully once they made it to high school. She went around and told everyone that they'd never actually dated, that Tate had simply stalked her. Pretty much everyone believed the great Tiana Lu. That left Tate feeling a strong disdain towards relationships and it took him meeting a girl that went to another school at a party before he ever got lucky enough to score his first kiss. They didn't date for long, as the distance was great enough to impede their relationship. It's one of the biggest reasons why Gio skipped out on his parents' new years party that year and chose instead to go hang out with Tate.
The perfect way to cheer him up was to bring over Chinese takeout and eat it together on his rooftop. It was so stupidly cold that Gio thought they’d freeze up there before the ball dropped, but it didn't matter. He had sparklers, they could hear people below on the street partying, and had a view of some of the fireworks they'd set off at the nearby park. The only way Gio really wanted to bring in the New Year. They could hear the countdown from everyone shouting it, but what caught him completely off guard was Tate reaching over right whenever they got to zero and pulling Gio closer to him. They missed the beginning of the fireworks, but Gio still saw them somewhere else when his lips touched Tate’s. He could tell how nervous Tate was. He probably thought he’d just ruined everything; that their whole friendship was going to be completely over. That's why he gently touched Gio’s lips when he pulled away, like he'd never see them again.
He’d never forget the way Tate quickly mumbled an apology and turned to watch the fireworks after that. His shoulders were tensed up and he gripped the railing of the roof so tightly that his knuckles turned white. It all hit Gio right there. His best friend liked him a lot more than a best friend was supposed to. Most guys would have recoiled, or hit their friend, or anything else that was extremely negative. Instead, Gio just somehow felt... free. It was an honor to be liked by Tate. He had no idea how to voice any of that. He couldn't even decide what he should say to make Tate feel better, or to explain that he didn't think he was entirely straight. Gio could have said anything, but instead he chose to just wrap his arm around Tate’s shoulders and say he was glad that he got to have a kiss on New Year's.
One of the things Gio thought he would have changed back then was kissing him again. Maybe it would have still ruined their friendship. Maybe Gio would have broken Tate’s heart all the same and still ended back up with Pippa, and then all alone. He'll never know now as he stumbles through trying to mend what little bit of a relationship they have left and finally understands exactly how Tate felt as a kid.
If only Gio knew that love that strong was hard to simply forget about, or get rid of. Perhaps that would have made him a bit more brave, rather than waiting until it was almost too late to admit his own feelings. One step at a time, though! Our brave hero will get there eventually, we must just have faith in him as he grapples with more than just supervillains and common criminals.
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