as you are, not what i want you to be
165Please respect copyright.PENANA67O5HS62wj
What I love about you isn’t solely based on the perception or impression you give me or the rest of the world.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA90yH3pafOC
What I love about you are all the reasons why you don’t believe I can love you or that anyone should love you to the depths that I do.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAaOTW4rsGK8
Your strengths and grace in what you know and are may make you beautiful, but your weaknesses and insecurities make you perfect for me.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAxeokq0D7yW
When I look into your eyes, I see what other men choose not to see. I accept what other men can’t or won’t accept. Choosing to love you will be the easiest thing I’ll ever do, but losing you will be the hardest feat I’d have to overcome.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAe4qu1Z10Dq
I can’t promise in the future, I won’t harm you. I can’t promise that I’ll always be the perfect man.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAgbnA9A4Pdq
What I can promise is to learn from my mistakes, to have patience with you even when I don’t have patience with myself and to trust you with every fiber of my being. We may live to grow old together, we may not.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAM4tEZDx7lY
No matter when, no matter what time we have now I’ve come to realize the paradox I find myself in: It will always be enough and it will never be enough; I will always be blessed as I will always be cursed.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAP2s9ZQjZBa
Every day that passes makes me joyful because I’m free of the delusion that someone couldn’t love me, when I’m with you I don’t have to hide who I truly am, who I’ve forgotten I could be.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAWBGajeBwsR
Every day that passes makes me miserable because I know I have fewer days with you than I’d like. If I could have one wish, it would be to go back in time and relive all the moments we’ve shared.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAUvkGczucQU
The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly because none of the great memories would have ever existed without our struggles. The pain has helped us love harder, appreciate the time we have, and give us the patience to love each other in all our forms.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAusI9LQJlDM
I vow to love you as you are and not stand in the way of who you want to be. I love you, and I vow to love you for the rest of my life, regardless of where this journey takes us.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAyfMFEPqREq
For you, I would do anything and everything, all you have to do is ask.
165Please respect copyright.PENANARYqhqfIltG
Solo
165Please respect copyright.PENANAzftz9EZvMj
I have never been much of a talker, I’m comfortable with blending in the background and letting the rest have their fun.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAiuhWpuIglA
It's hard enough for me to focus and get outside of my head, so being in the present or having a conversation is truly difficult and sometimes feels like an impossible task.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAyGJvw3oDL9
Don’t get me wrong, when I speak and join in, it's fulfilling and people tend to be fond of me, but that doesn’t make it any easier to partake in any social environment.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAQO5IEK9uAI
I thrive in isolation, especially when I get my hands on a project dealing with creativity or using my imagination whether it is to create music, write, digital art, or an invention for random issues that I am ill-equipped to bring to fruition outside of the digital realm and into reality.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAT81IC2QlAc
If I’m not in a constant state of flow, I don’t feel any purpose and shortly begin to lose interest in anything at hand that doesn’t seem productive.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAlyXvBV6KuQ
What doesn’t help is that none of my creations have any substance outside of my laptop, it's so much easier to create, save, and then return to it later without committing to more.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA1qemGGiEHv
All I am is committed to fantasizing about what I feel would make my life better; falling in love with the random girl who stares at me from across the room, waiting for her to smile at me so I can approach while thinking of a hundred different conversations we could have and the best way for me to make a good impression.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAsu1fKX0Pc4
I think about a life with this person; how our worlds would collide and we’d both be better off for it until finances get in the way, my living situation being back home with my parents, my sobriety which will always mean I’m an addict whether I am sober or not.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAmTtIbuh5iz
In minutes I think of everything that could go right, and then everything that could go wrong. I’ve always been in love with falling in love.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA6qSLvrC1sx
It's beautiful because love encompasses everything, there’s pain, sorrow, guilt, vanity, and sacrifice, but on the other hand, there is joy, passion, and companionship, that takes dedication, commitment, communication, and choosing to love and be with someone every day, in all of their forms.
165Please respect copyright.PENANABFyZc04sBu
Honesty
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None of it matters the finances, the weight, my looks, my intelligence, my job, my mental illness, my routine, etc.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAEW3013VeMi
It’s just all an excuse because I don’t deserve love.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAYD43KstRTa
I have vehemently pushed aside good things, good friends, good relationships, especially good women.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAFwnKJJg4Xp
I don’t want to feel like I deserve it.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAgSyd0VyVJF
I don’t want to make the time to actually improve, I just want to live doing the minimal, avoiding as much pain as possible.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAflr00n66KZ
I don’t have control and I never will. I am sad. I feel lonely, but at this point, this must be what I want.
165Please respect copyright.PENANATDkRXeRRuS
In any relationship, I refuse to get close unless the other person can provide me with comfort and ease.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAN97UxKI1zf
I’m a narcissist, I only feed off of other people like a leech, a parasite, more like a vampire.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAFmFSBhvTXW
Being sensitive and conforming all the time has become my nature.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAPTBRwhkZXx
Im not only addicted to Alcohol, Nicotine, and Marijuana.…
165Please respect copyright.PENANAgKshJPbpzA
Im addicted to suffering and draining the people who love me most because I’m not even sure I love them the way they love me.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAU4xedKjp1R
I just don’t try,
165Please respect copyright.PENANATq8sQrEGvx
I don’t want to try. Its easier to be everything, but me. Its less complicated.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA5kAgGzH138
I dont want to be scrutinized because I already know how terrible I am as a human being.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAes4OSJHE0g
I can’t even say I’ve tried hard not be everything I hate. I am extremely intelligent and I limit myself.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAFX4wDpI7Ra
I make unwise choices because when I hate failing.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAv7GHedmRCB
I hate being feeling less. I hate being less, actually I love being less.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA6jnjIcmS1j
Confusion and complexity is the only thing I strive for which is why I never want to work on myself.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAG2vJp5byT7
I could read an unquantifiable number of books, do drugs, sleep with anyone, fall in love with anyone and it’ll never be enough.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAjazMPx1lg8
I will never be enough for myself and that is why I will never be anything more than what I am today or what I was the day before and I’m not okay with that, but I’m scared. I’m deathly afraid of me, I don’t know if I could even handle knowing the person I have become.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAUHV376tEiO
I wish I had the courage to liberate myself instead of always convincing myself to liberate others.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAqkycEVLEID
Fond Of
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What im fond of..
165Please respect copyright.PENANAn2orQq6uD4
I am fond of memories, until im not
165Please respect copyright.PENANAu2uUSzCjIW
I am fond of love, until im not
165Please respect copyright.PENANA79ZHEXXyA2
I am fond of fairytales, until im not
165Please respect copyright.PENANAZAgS65VITa
I am fond of family, until im not
165Please respect copyright.PENANAPwujBYNk9u
I am fond of life, until im not
165Please respect copyright.PENANA2xilbtUVrC
I am fond of giving, until im not
165Please respect copyright.PENANAYSBEXOnism
I am fond of you because this.. I cannot and will not stop
165Please respect copyright.PENANA7KUhYm7WzC
Paranoia
165Please respect copyright.PENANAJrX047W2pB
Every day, being aware of your thoughts, but not just the act of thinking.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAxAT7fEjLCv
Organizing, Rationalizing, and battling the sequence, the line of insecurities, the paranoia, the way I perceive the world around me.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAh4ulPTnDjw
Its the same assumption, more like accusations every 24 hours:
165Please respect copyright.PENANApcjCIesGht
Are they laughing at me?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAF5ApCOih76
Do they think I’m ugly?
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Do they laugh because I’m ugly?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAEZiEohywfl
They must be looking at me because there is something wrong with me.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAnoXqp0tcIO
Is there something wrong with me?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAfGAKtlvFPb
Why do I care? Why do I let myself care?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAX3vdlBnRi2
Is she looking at me?
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I wish she would look at me.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAoMB0E2oCwi
Why isn’t she interested?
165Please respect copyright.PENANA2bEDvBHL5I
Do I even want her to be interested?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAwD8f3QEU0Y
Its better if she isn’t.
165Please respect copyright.PENANACpvodw2DIV
Im not in the right head space, financial stability, patience, looks, or the fact I’m not interesting enough.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAj7j9MOxIpz
Am I enough?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAK2r8iM7uzY
Will I ever be enough?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAOxdCihpFB3
If I eat this am I going to be fat?
165Please respect copyright.PENANARmUQ3tuoTK
Am I going to be even more unattractive?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAzk3glWaq8P
If I don’t pray, if I don’t show gratitude, if I don’t give mercy to others, how can I expect it from God?
165Please respect copyright.PENANArDhUTCwIwT
Does god even want to hear from me?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAbftEs7OC6N
I don’t want to pray because Im tired and it feels like a waste of my time.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAb7DUQoZHHz
When I do speak to God, does he take the time to listen when I have doubts, practically have zero faith?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAIpgfVI3Rnx
Am I just a loser who lives at home with Mom and Rick? Are they helping me or am I just manipulating them?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAqYexol3d8Q
Love Her
165Please respect copyright.PENANABwP0VJn86j
How can I begin to liberate myself from this burden of loops consisting of only what ifs?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAXtS4oaM0r3
Some days I think about you until dawn.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAKmam9As31W
Most days now, I am restless.
165Please respect copyright.PENANABuTNEZ07zV
Producing, then digesting mountains of fantasies hoping theirs a side of you that sees what I do.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA50Feq5hHtX
Still, we repel and with each passing moment, I bleed.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA29ziZn1ieH
I lose all sense of consciousness and am yours.
165Please respect copyright.PENANASoZlp4hpMN
Am I fool or a hopeless romantic?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAXbLCAHU1j1
Is there a clear distinction between the two?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAPaKAghGcjE
I find myself treading along a silver lining.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAKE8PoZSWvW
She believes she’s lead by kismet, but how can that be with a leash around its neck?
165Please respect copyright.PENANAl4ywwkfWqj
This path she walks erodes her.
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It erodes me.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAsiZOrBtysH
I feel it on her skin when we touch.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAnXh3UDBJAq
Spiraling
165Please respect copyright.PENANA8Y3AmXCMnr
I am losing my mind all over again and I’m afraid of what can and will happen next.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAjVOsJI0G4C
There is so much that I need, but I think they are just things I want which is a huge difference.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAEf7I4gNy2e
Its not a bad to want something, but to cling onto it as if it’ll fix everything, or the key to my happiness is where I fall short.
165Please respect copyright.PENANASkuktf7thU
I keep on focusing on the outside, external factor that are the issue, but I don’t attempt to fix the broken pieces inside of me.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAhf2RYWcQQd
I need to be validate in everything I do, or else I’ll never be good enough.
165Please respect copyright.PENANABFcAhiDeSu
There is a wickedness inside of me that I feed.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAJUBBLABbFr
I believe in all the negative and rarely the positive.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA0DuYHoWpmA
I am getting much better and more mindful about the decisions and life choices im making, but that doesn’t mean I’m okay.
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Because im not. I’m not okay.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAslUQ2Dambl
I dont want to with anyone because im scared of being rejected.
165Please respect copyright.PENANArf0oQz96XT
Im scared of getting close to someone else and not pulling through or giving them too much of me.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAom0wMrnO2d
I know that if I got to that point and something bad happens like a break up, too many fights, different life plans/future, I’d be utterly devastated.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAlgrQtlnNrd
I can barely hold myself together as is.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAqsf393ZLHh
I wake up in the morning when I wish I could be dreaming.
165Please respect copyright.PENANApGcHMmUFBp
I go downstairs and make myself an awesome smoothie with strawberries, bananas, cinnamon sugar almond butter oats and some milk.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAIKbAyMhVcZ
Its really fucking good.
165Please respect copyright.PENANACaP4Qzx1Rg
I watch tv for about an hour or less, take my medicine and then head to the gym.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAfV6Y5GnRy1
I park my car closer to the bank which is further away from Planet Fitness because I like walking the distance.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAnuEBUG0XIE
I enter the gym, swipe my barcode with my membership and ask for 20 minutes on the Hydromassage.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAlm7ji8NmVP
After I go stretch for 10 to 15 minutes, lift for another 20 to 30 minutes, then walk for an hour while reading my books.
165Please respect copyright.PENANATn113qUtxn
I get to read like 30 pages which I really enjoy, but lately its all felt monotonous, I am struggling to do the things that I used to really enjoy.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA9DRocrPoV5
I stretch for another 10 to 15 minutes or hit the hydromassage for another 10 minutes.
165Please respect copyright.PENANABkBAAhrovH
This is when I leave and head back home.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA9tL81FFCKf
Going back home I look forward to eating, sometimes showering, making myself eggs , drinking some protein powder (double chocolate).
165Please respect copyright.PENANATI2dA7eXfN
I sit to watch something on Netflix, Hulu, Prime or YouTube while promoting my music.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA6fPrlZFlGl
Sometimes Ill make music, sometimes, Ill write a story or create some digital art.
165Please respect copyright.PENANATnJVm7jrQ8
Lately, I’ve been getting into rom coms and feel good movies to distract myself.
165Please respect copyright.PENANA6fC8J2dOU2
I want to be convinced that something good lies ahead.
165Please respect copyright.PENANAq5Bkzsi2ZM
I want to believe that something real and tangible is going to happen.
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