Let's talk about... some mediocre writing advice
I've finished six novels. I've published three of them. I've broken even on one.
That's a 16.67% success rate, if y'math it.
"But you're a published author! Who can say that?"
A lot more people than I'd like to admit, friend... but the difference is, most of those authors don't know what it's like to scratch at a rock and hope the dust that flakes off turns into an income that will rival my father's. Well, alright, they probably do.
"Oh, you're just being modest."
I really, really wish I was. But the fact of the matter is, I can shout from the roof tops, "I'M PUBLISHED AND I'M PROUD!" all I want... but the truth is, I'd rather be shouting, "WEEEEE LOOK AT ALL THIS MONEY!" as I swan dive into a pool of grape Jello.
"That's a really selfish thing to wish... So when do I get that free copy you promised?"
I'm tired of dedicating things to my next door neighbor's second cousin's nephew. I'm tired of saying, "Well if you're curious, you should buy it." I'm tired of saying, "Yeah, I write..." and then letting out a leaden sigh. I'm tired of admitting, "You can't find it in Barnes and Noble anymore... I didn't get enough of a following last month, and they already had their local author line-up picked for the next three quarters."
"But you're just doing this for fun right? You shouldn't expect you'll make any money off this hobby. Writing's for geniuses... Writing's for like, actual writers, ya know?"
According to my acquaintances, authors and writers and poets and play writes just spawn out of the ether, spewing wisdom beyond their time's ken, forever alone to wallow in their infinite, enigmatic roles as Keepers of All that is Holy in the Universe: THE TRUTH.
I can get behind that theory, as it assumes my own genius, but... as painful as it is to admit, it's not accurate. It may be true for some writers. Some of them really do pop out of their mothers, prolific and profitable, but for me... I had to practice. I had to mess up. I had to fail. I had to fail again. I had to fail... again... until it became funny.
I know I come off bitter and sanctimonious in this one, but hear me out--there's some optimism in here somewhere, I promise. Because writing as a process is fun! It's also painful, amazing, cathartic, delightful, and depressing. To contrast, publishing is both nerve wracking and exhilarating. But marketing? Oh boy. Marketing yourself is just a pain in the tush.
When I had this romantic image of being a writer as a kid, I thought I'd be behind a closed door for months and then would appear like Moses down from the mountain, bearing the covenants for all to gaze upon in awe. "THIS IS THE WILL OF YOUR GOD!" I'd bellow as I held up my tome... basically.
But, just like Moses setting eyes upon his people and the golden calf, when I first laid eyes upon "The Industry" and the money and the marketing and the agencies and "my fellow writers", I was filled with a fury, a resentment... a betrayal. AND I SMASHED SOME STUFF TO MAKE IT KNOWN.
But then, just like Moses, I went back to the drawing board. I chiseled and chipped and snorted my own tome dust and... discovered that that was okay. Sometimes you gotta break some eggs and all that.
Before I mix too many more metaphors into this already sprawling affair, I'll conclude with this piece of advice: No matter what obstacles you face as you write, no matter what daunting next-step stands before you, no matter what people say or believe... You are a writer. You are a good writer. You may not be a good author. You may not even be the best kind of people person you could be. Sometimes you say nasty things and think nasty thoughts, and sometimes your words hurt more than than they help...
But you can help. And you will.
That's why writing is important--to us and the people who think we just come up with this crap while we're smoking on the shitter. Writing does spell out THE TRUTH. It may not be THE TRUTH anyone wants to read or bear, but it's TRUTH to someone out there. So don't stop. Don't stop writing. Fight the good fight. Fight it with everything you have.
Because 16.67% may not look like much of a success. Breaking even may not be enough for me. All the effort of writing six books to only see one reach some modicum of notoriety might seem like a waste of time... but for the folks who read that one book, that one success was all that mattered.
One is still better than none.
Cheers --Blondie
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