It was a VERY strong wind that day, and I absolutely swear to god that none of it was my fault. Seriously, guys. It was the WIND that knocked my umbrella into that dork's face. And his coffee fell too, rolling away. I explicitly articulated my most SINCEREST apologies and how I was just as much publicly humiliated as him.
"What is wrong with you-- I'm Gabe by the way--," he took my gloved hand to shake before returning to his nuclear meltdown. "--And what is wrong with you, coming out of nowhere, a ninja slash cat monkey assaulting my vulnerability, battering me to a pulp, leaving me struggling within in an inch of my life. I have asthma, you brute. Precious people like me die from wheezing. How dare you."
"I am MIRANDA," I shrug at Gabe. "Guess I am TOO MUCH of a woman for you."1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8L3pEJ3rw5
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc923KcoVxy
With the last word, I STRUT away. A minute later, it grew apparent he won't let that happen. He ran to my side, stammering and BLUBBERING like a fool.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVEAaaGiLM
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhAoKaIl1iq
"Now, just wait a gosh-darned second here!" Gabe raised a finger. I kept a straight face when inside I just wanted to LOL. "You still owe me coffee-- and for mangling my face-- who knows if I ever see you again."1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKIe4Aa4Vu
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtg4dNT2Lb
"I did not MANGLE your face! The wind did! Your face is not mangled, your face is perfectly FINE!" I huffed, realizing we stood outside the cafe. "I am being blackmailed and entrapped. I am not okay with it!"1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW3vFscgbOW
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGc2qHi4rFo
The clouds roared back, and rain shattered. I fought with the umbrella.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkSTGcpvVix
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cECXEFzu8
"So it's a date!" Gabe shouted over the hysteria. 1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBIe2QMLvPG
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg7Quhd9eRH
"NO. GOODBYE FOREVER." I stormed off into the storm, wrestling with the umbrella and the wind. It took until the stoplight when Gabe ran up at the moment the wind grew VERY strong again. I swear to god, it was NOT ME the first time and it was STILL not me the second time. SMACK.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7wENxSdqoH
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2ay4OeCET
The umbrella slapped Gabe ... again. I SHRIEKED in horror.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2pzwOU0GD
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95bYTJudLB
"What is wrong with you-- ," Gabe said as the pedestrian sign lit up and chased me across the splashing street. "-- I think I'm bleeding! Am I bleeding? My poor mangled face. You may rob me of my coffee and my dignity but you can't get rid of me that easy, infernal murderess. A menace to society, I say! We are all in danger!"
"Then stay FAR away from me!" 1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMWTPgnjG9
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXoMX1MzZs
Gabe took my gloved hand, and at that moment our hair rose. White lightning struck -- shocking us both. We keeled over, tased and jolted in waves until it was over. We glanced at each other with fresh and cooked eyes. Smoke steamed from our bodies. Boots were knocked from our feet. We marveled that we were electrocuted and somehow miraculously survived. I nodded, "Okay... Coffee sounds good right now..."1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTVVpnySWWj
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkv5kqjVlyJ
"So it's a date, Miranda," Gabe said, pleased. "That is spectacular."1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqVI9OLvkfb
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiogAdS2r9e
"It is NOT a date," I insisted. "This is strictly normal and boring. People get hit by lightning all the time, Gabe."1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZyBHXroDS
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbsZgeilHu3
"And you're buying!" He pointed an accusing finger.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35VGWuFkgb
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ebQgnCZq7
"No, if anything it is YOU who are buying," I bickered. 1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpTXekslk4j
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOahvOss3Q
"If I'm buying, ergo it's a date."1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC5AHxsBkge
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh3kg3tnTDe
"NOPE. WRONG. Regardless of someone buying, it is NOT--"1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8KxIa9Udf
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Q0MsLhp5r
We got struck by white lightning twice and wound up in the hospital, in the same room, with a curtain drawn between us. We spent hours staring at the ceiling arguing whose fault it was and how awful the coffee were here.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjciULgzG1w
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlORUA8yTs8
Then his voice stopped. I looked at the curtain, hearing a droning flatline. I tore the curtain back. He was off the machine, leaning in for a kiss.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu7oIIMIxiq
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHjlHBajmr
"Kiss me?" 1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpQpYErvwxS
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqsfzGmAyIy
It was so OBVIOUS he was going to be my husband.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kcsi2BmhK
So OBVIOUS he was going to be the father of my child.1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcbpbeTz8mX
Gabe. That sweet dork. How can I not love him? 1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLr4Qij2bO
1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOD3KvvimtX
"No, you kiss me," I said. His eyes closed, as if to melt.
In our hospital gowns, we locked lips. And the rest?1016Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQa0gIoqCRY
The rest was, as they say, a WEIRD love story.
