Clint started to drive out onto the road. Neither of us were talking yet. I decided to break the ice, though. I needed to know what was going on with him.
"Is there...is there something wrong, Clint?" I asked as I looked at him.
Clint didn't look at me. He kept his eyes on the road as we past by a few trees and houses.
"It's Moonie."
Ouch. Okay, now I know that there has to be something going on. Clint didn't mind that I called him by his first name all this time and now he wants me to call him by his nickname instead?
I stayed quiet and sat back in my seat. I lifted my elbow on the car door and laid my head on the window. I rested my hand on my thigh. I stared out the window, deciding not to talk anymore. I soon heard Clint sigh and I knew he was about to say something. My heart was starting to race and there was another knot in my stomach. I was so nervous now. My mind was racing with millions of thoughts. I wasn't sure what Clint wanted to talk about but I had a feeling in my gut that it wasn't good.
"Cloud, I like you. You know that right?"
I nodded. I didn't feel like talking but I made a noise to let him know that I was hearing him.
"Mhm."
"Okay. I think you're completely awesome and helpful and trustworthy. I haven't met anybody like you before. You're special in a way and it's crazy how we're alike in some ways. What i'm trying to say is...I like you a lot but..."
Uh oh. Here it comes.
"I don't think we should keep seeing each other."
I felt a lump in my throat and my heart was pounding in my chest now.
"I've been dreading this moment. I don't want to do this but I need to focus on surviving. Firebird needs me and I don't want to put you in that situation where I might go out on a supply run and then never come back because I end up getting gnawed on."
I curled my fingers up in my hand and swallowed the large lump in my throat. I was praying to myself that I don't burst out crying in front of him.
"That's the last thing that I want to happened and I don't want it to be vice versa too where you'll be gone and i'll never know when you're coming back. That thought scares me and I've been thinking about it all last night while you were sleeping."
I allowed my hair to fall in front of my eyes. I didn't want Clint to see my eyes tearing up.
Clint glanced over to me before looking at the road again.
"Are you...going to be okay? Do you understand?"
I knew where he was getting at but I didn't care. I wanted to be Clint and even though it'll hurt to hear that he died while he was out on a run, at least I knew we had shared something special and had good memories together. Should I tell him that and possible change his mind? Or keep quiet and let him think whatever? I didn't know what to do.
"Clint...I mean Moonie..." I could already hear my voice cracking.
Clint sighed then stopped the car. He looked over to me then grabbed my hand that was curled up and held onto it. I didn't look at him because I didn't want to look at him.
"Get out of the car."
I lifted my head up and looked over to see Clint unbuckling himself and getting out of the car. I sighed then unbuckled myself too and hopped out. I closed the door and watched him walk around the car and over to me. He then hugged me without saying anything. I just stood there, stunned until I hugged him back.
"Clint...I understand where you're coming from but...are you that afraid? Are you afraid of risking to have something special? Sure, it'll hurt to hear that one of us might be dead but...at least we would had some good memories. I don't want to sit around and wonder 'what if', you know?"
Clint didn't say anything. He just pulled away from me then cupped my face into his hands. He reached a hand up and brushed my hair out of my face. I stared at him as he stared back at me then we shared a kiss. It was a long kiss but it was nice. Clint finally pulled away and smiled a little then nodded.
"You're right. You're absolutely right. I don't want to sit around and wonder 'what if' either."
I smiled at his words then he kissed me again. We pulled away and stared into each other's eyes again.
"I was foolish to think like that." He chuckled softly.
I simply shook my head.
"It wasn't foolish. You just have a lot on your mind. Right?"
He nodded then kissed me again.
This kiss lasted a bit longer and we finally pulled away and embraced each other.
"Do you want to spend another night together tonight?" He whispered into my ear.
I nodded.
"Good. Cause tomorrow, I have to teach you how to drive."
I pulled away from him with surprise.
"Really?"
He nodded.
"Unless...you already know how to drive?"
I shook my head.
"Not really."
Clint smiled.
"Good because Firebird wanted to make sure you knew how to drive before going out on more supply runs."
I smiled brightly then embraced him some more.
After more kissing and embracing, we finally got back into the car and headed back to camp. I guess you can say that Clint is my official boyfriend now. It's pretty exciting but it's also funny that I needed an apocalypse to happened in order to get a wonderful boyfriend like him. On our way back to the camp, we held hands. Now I felt better and comforted by him. I wonder what's in store for us in the future.
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