After the visit to the cemetery, I decided I wanted to go home and talk to my mom about the letter I found. I hadn't talked to anyone about it and I wanted to discuss it with her before my session with Dr. Alder tomorrow. I wonder if she would tell me to find him, or stay here and just wonder what could have been.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYV6cqAFtXr
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I wasn't even sure what I wanted to do. In all honesty, I hadn't thought about the letter for awhile. It's not that I didn't want to, it's just that to me, there were more pressing matters at hand. Like the nightmares. Something told me they were just going to keep getting worse. And what if I had a dream about killing Jared, and then he's found dead?450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ66PtZm8o5s
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Even though I'm not actually the one doing these things, it's terrifying to know that someone is. I feel like whoever it is, is trying to get to me, because they're murdering the people around me. First John, then Cassie. Who was next? That was the hardest thing to thing about. About who out of the people around me would be savagely killed, either shot, stabbed, or whatever else the killer chose to do to them.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ28qvW7DfvX
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These were the things I thought about as Jude drove me to my house. We didn't talk about Abbie, though I was curious, and we didn't talk about the kiss that never should have happened. We didn't talk about anything he turned down my road. Then he turned to me, his eyes serious.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPDvSsEVDKH
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"Kendall." His voice was urgent now. "I have to tell you something."450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCIuiB2tiOP
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I looked at him. "If it's about the kiss, don't worry about it. I know it was wrong, that I shouldn't have done it. I have a boyfriend."450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsf2spzRpv6
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Jude scoffed. "Right. A boyfriend who just pushes you away and leaves you standing alone in an empty school parking lot. Tell me, have you heard from him since then?"450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZbFxDTQeiA
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"Well no."450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNou56breEI
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"Exactly. But that isn't what I wanted to talk about."450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7xnGWU7C4
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"Can it wait?" I asked as we pulled closer to my house. I opened the door and looked back at him.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLP7fUwxaRo
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"No," he said, shaking his head. He reached over and cupped my cheek. "It wasn't supposed to be like this," he murmured, more to himself than me. "It was just fucking business, I was not supposed to get attached."450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtu4bayoDA
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I blinked, removed his hand, and said, "What's going on?"450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqwMyyGMkF7
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"Do you think it was by luck that I began talking to you? I wish it was. I wish I wasn't in this shitty situation, but I am, and I'm about to make it worse."450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1fYL14a0vv
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"What are you talking about?"450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDGpdPjJobw
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The fact that he couldn't even look at me hurt. Slowly, I grasped his hand and held it tightly.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxJia3h5Ek
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"You can tell me anything, you know. I'm not going to judge you."450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBulSPvacN
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He looked at me and smiled. The smile was all wrong. It wasn't warm or caring, but like he knew whatever he had to tell me I wasn't going to like. That maybe I would hate it. Maybe I would hate him. I didn't think that last part was possible.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG1v8jxTEk0
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"I was paid a lot of money to befriend you, Kendall. I was supposed to get information about you for someone. I don't even really know who the guy is, but anyway, I don't want to do it anymore. I care about you and I'm not willing to ruin what I have with you for a few bucks."450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgSisdha0BW
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I couldn't believe what he was telling me. I was so mad that I started to tremble. Every part of me wanted to hit him. When I spoke, my voice was chipped, bitter.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvOjyVnzkx
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"How much money?"450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4mzCSDxE2t
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"Excuse me?" Jude said. He stammered a little when he said it. He wasn't expecting that question.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2h2nNyfG8O
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"How much money were you offered to put up a false friendship? How much was my agony worth to you?" I glared at him. "How fucking much?" I slammed my foot into the dashboard of his car, breaking the glove compartment open. Papers fluttered out and I heard him make a noise, then I looked down.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0yQ17d7sMu
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My face, all different angles and views, stared up at me.450Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLM8BvdD5P