第二朝我好準時咁樣係八點就起左身梳洗，比起平日番工俾要鬧鐘連環震尻十幾廿次都依舊唔想離開張床，今日既我就好似中左邪咁，居然會好自動自覺起身準備，睇黎「愛情」既魔力真係唔細。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuFyiqqSWoN
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiGcDrHdg64
抱住緊張既心情，出口之前我係咁同自己講，今日無論點都好，我點都唔可以衰俾人睇！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGPOaYh7fWY
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTHC8ARSCCB
雖然一直以黎我都係冇女朋友，但係其實自己一直都有同女仔進行正常溝通，I mean係老母親戚外既女性朋友。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRsdKPMYIs8
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2HfqclaYBv
好似公司個班三姑六婆，以前係學校既groupmate，玩ocamp識既靚靚組媽組女咁，每位女性其實我都可以同佢地正常咁進行溝通，只不過我從來都未試過係佢地身上感受過屬於女性既吸引力。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEUy9WbSjOA
如果唔係因為我對住女優起到機打丁，我都幾懷疑自己個性取向。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡubwnXcnkb3
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2sgrV1qDfM
換走左平時頹廢look既運動衫褲，我好難得咁拎左套自己覺得著起黎翹口兼杉手既文青恤衫加件加長袖毛衣，雖則話就話係PTGF，但係自己都係執執個形象好，如果唔係一陣換著係對方彈自己鐘，咁就真係柒到冇朋友喇。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqpAvoW8jYp
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVKaHkT9hLX
我通過連登知道而家呢班女好多都揀飲擇食，如果見到個男仔唔士正會直接直行直過扮唔識對方。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5ZbZGruPO
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4lrMrmFpV
因為約左對方係sogo門口等，所以坐巴士會比較方便，再一次檢查左自己全身上下冇穿冇漏就準備出口。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJ12JgOxSL
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkcRDGXj7df
「喂，老婆，個仔著到成隻孔雀咁做乜？」1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8zohbfirQ4
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIU25Fyl4HM
「你問我把鬼咩，自己問個仔喇！唔好阻住我睇劇先啦。」1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34lI9YaqLQ
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAevVmFwlOm
「唔係呢，佢好少會咁反常著到咁架．．．大佬佢係獨仔黎，唔會係．．．」1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpQIozbUS6M
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwV894QLLRa
「係乜鬼，你個仔成個櫃都放滿哂啲大波妹公仔，你慌死佢係基佬咩！」1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGIMuPa46ab
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwNLMV8ln1h
我無視左老豆疑惑既眼神同老母充滿攻擊性既言語，自信滿滿咁係老母疑惑既眼神下行出門口。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8mFV9CtJt
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上左巴士之後我當然不忘同阿Tiffany確認一下對方係咪已經出左門。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGjL8rlq09
nooneremember：早晨1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ7e9qPQUi5
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMDXSwfVPdu
tiffanynoname_214：早呀～1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKuHcGZ9Ifo
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwJgNgsU5j
nooneremember：出左門喇？1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmj9v6QPawj
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwzBa6ywfh
tiffanynoname_214：嗯，已經上左車喇，一陣見！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5WYEx8hNdb
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9E9yfcbzy
確認左對方唔會放飛機之後，我安心咁插住耳機準備享受呢一程短短地既車程，耳機係到播放緊我最近幾鍾意既台灣樂隊——茄子蛋。係音樂一途我會放低成見，唔會因為平時打機俾惡劣台狗雷得多而覺得台灣人就係低汁，畢竟惡劣既只係一大群中既一小部份人。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2xtzxeXTJB
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dGdSZ2t8n
而正當我準備好好咁沉醉係自己既世界時，永遠就係會有啲事夾硬令到我番到黎現實，我發現係前幾排既座位有個大媽正用緊唔咸唔淡既廣東話大大聲講電話，當正個上層得佢一條友坐哂咁樣，聲浪之大甚至可以突破到耳機既隔音功能。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0btlIHu2b
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBXj1o8qOeO
果然樹大必有枯枝呢句野永遠都唔會過時。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7u3PPUBgQX
可惜既係將近坐滿既上半層巴士居然冇人夠膽出聲叫個大媽收番細個聲浪，唔知係唔係因為我地香港人太怕事，所以永遠都係咁俾人恰到上心口？1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wB14LLEKh
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNcgCOxGfo
正當我已經企緊起身，準備同大媽上演一場2019 version既「巴士阿叔」事件時，突然有一個女仔比我快左一步，佢正正係坐左係左右前皆空既大媽後方，係最受到干擾既一個乘客。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCHYB65W60E
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAIKgtUkFON
「守遮牙，請文一夏你撚不撚講華講小腥一點，同埋關番個擴陰共能呢？」唔知係有心定無意，個女仔用住古天樂式既普通話希望同大媽進行溝通，我估計佢應該係講小姐可唔可以講細聲啲同閂番個死人擴音。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJE1oALaGx7
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKZQa7AL6Dc
「你講咩華！家陣禾講典華系吾系都關你事下！」大媽咁耐以黎坐車都係習慣開住擴音事無忌大進行緊大範圍式轟炸，幾時試過俾人咁樣叫停過？1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR1M1Z6vBSm
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZOl4BA33P
眼前呢個死靚妹居然夠膽挑戰自己，分明就係歧視我地新來港人士同埋挑戰緊每一位大媽既尊嚴！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc5fTyucLws
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPsvnHCci8v
「你咁樣真係會影響到成車人，唔該你控制下個聲浪。」個女仔冇俾大媽大大聲嚇著，好冷靜沉穩咁應對，處變不驚。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡziapitMbls
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1PeC1TTBnT
「你家陣系吾系奇歧禾下！禾港典華又吾會狗著你，你體下成車人刀矛人出腥牙，得你系到牙支牙左，你系吾系要玩耶阿！」操住一口大媽式廣東話，大媽一上黎就將個女仔放左係加害者既身份上，再用成個唔出聲既上層黎做掩護。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHyfFKuMXpm
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0lAY5LX4OK
呢招，高！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmAaNOl9hs4
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09LLIDN2ha
「咁就算佢地忍到，唔代表我要接受你既噪音污染！呢到係公共交通工具，唔係你私人地方！你俾咁多錢上車我又係俾咁多錢上車，我家陣老馮要聽住你大大聲同朋友吹水咩？」女仔冇就咁認輸，大大條道理係到反擊對方，有住自己立場同論點。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs4yzLzDt3x
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhf6tZtEt5j
「同梨港野刀哂戲，你刀港呢到系公車，甘吾中意，梨咪去坐私家車囉，傻逼！」大媽知道自己如果再同對方講道理一定會輸，所以決定一於唔理，繼續大大聲講自己野，轉頭唔理個女仔。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfhkgMczgTe
對於慢慢落入下風既女仔，我決定要出手幫幫佢，如果多個人一齊聲討大媽，咁呢場仗就多一分勝算，我地唔可以事事都逆來順受。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLKnJEfWUI
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpZ52iZWfuU
正當我慢慢由最後排既五人座企起身準備前去聲援時，一件神奇既事發生左。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNrP1yv5XXu
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrLnZga4c4K
碰碰、啪！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAQzlanlAHU
碰碰、啪！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJZAgLplcP
碰碰、啪！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9tOZLNmUm
碰碰、啪！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMqVmwgSyk
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1T5Vm8kY38
Buddy, you're a boy, make a big noise—1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ961pJbHxan
Playing in the street, gonna be a big man someday！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ56ERz2Znf3
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tgUXZXgDo
只見個女仔居然拎起佢既電話較到最大聲喇叭，直接係呀姐背後大大聲播歌，首歌係我鍾意既老樂隊queen成名曲之一，we will rock you。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9pWTWoMcwU
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRUjHifiAqH
呢招以其人之道，還治其人之身，高明過呀姐個既屈打成招好多倍。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFIY2NA12V9
「呀！！！我屌你老母牙，死令妹！」我見到呀姐忍唔住轉身準備對個女仔做出物理攻擊，直接一個欺身上前擋開個下準備一野車落個女仔到既巴掌。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKCOB26MAk9
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLEkJ3jvjvt
平時我都唔會咁勇，但唔知點解今次真係好唔順個呀姐條氣，我決定就算俾人影相放上網笑都要收收佢皮，明明有錯再先都仲可以聲大夾惡，呢種人似足平時做錯野都要俾個鑊我既仆街上司。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxMQcU53hfo
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvw3iYS2es6
「你、你你你，你早乜牙死令仔！」呀姐既進攻俾我以進清十郎式既長矛攔截阻低，露出左驚恐既眼神。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhyPbbR8k5
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEb7hCFoX6
「講唔過人就郁手打人？」我以米八既身材直接頂左係呀姐同埋個女仔中間，捉住左呀姐繼續係到係咁瘋狂尻拍既右手，以防佢再出古惑。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJVoPEuuMO
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSMxIHteeF
「你！你戈死令仔，非黎牙！！！」大媽突然發出高達二百幾分貝既尖叫聲，令到全車上下既人都聽到佢個種劏豬式叫聲。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOzMb6zE0F
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRvazSVQOV2
誓估唔到佢會使出呢招女權撚最高傷害既必殺技，但以佢咁既尊容，同老屈緊我強姦隻豬根本就無分別。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnk08qL6Lwu
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7zeQ3i3hMv
「頂你個肺，岩先大聲講電話嘈住哂，家陣就尻叫，你痴夠線未呀！」1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡznvQHRKUdF
「屌你老母，收聲喇八婆！」1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9AGMt3j5r
「年初一就逼人同你開年，貪好玩呀大媽！」1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6VjSCByDvV
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNiCZktzar
上層既乘客們仲保持住人類最後一絲良知，佢地都終於忍唔住呢位痴撚線大媽，紛紛加入我地戰團幫手聲討大媽。1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7xS2SPORkc
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡekRx39y0uG
大媽見到形勢唔多對路，只可以敗走上層，極快速咁跑左落下層仲落埋車，見到佢邊走邊屌老母既逃走方法，我既感覺就好似見到個段呀叔追電車屌老母既youtube片咁，一個字——爽！1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxk3CEBobX
1376Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgacpX2cmza
