Mia was right. The boys in the picture were nearly transparent, as if they were ghosts! I moved the picture in another area where there was not as much sun and hoped that would help. To be honest, I did not think so much about why the picture changed. At the same time, I was very sad at the change, as it was my most precious procession. I knew that I had to take care of it.
Mia was not that interested in having children until we had a job and house. I wondered if it was because she was mature or was there something else. At any rate, I continued being the best husband that I could. I was very proud on the change and the fact that I have learned from my mistakes. I loved cooking and this became an important part of the day. I loved using my imagination and looked forward to we had guests. I loved their reaction to tasting the food.
One would think that I had a happy marriage this time. I learned from all my mistakes, and I was the perfect husband. Yet, Mia was not the same. It was as if she never smiled. It was like she was not happy. I remembered the first time we were married and the love and affection we had. This could not be seen the second time around. It was as if we were more like room-mates than a married couple.
Of course, we talked about it. Mia did not like these talks as she said she could not express how she felt.
“Its like I did all these things before,” she said, “We should be a married couple that is deeply in love with each other. It seems like I am in an unrealistic dream as this life is not the one I want. I think there must be something mentally wrong with me”
I would hold her hand and say nothing. I wanted at times to tell her the truth about time travel. This would either make her mad or she would not believe in it. I just had to hope that the love we had would win at the end!
The day came and went when Christopher should have been born. We had no baby and Mia was still sure that she did not want one. We did not have a house or stable jobs. Love was not enough. I was so sad the day that Christopher should have been born. I missed my children since I went back in time and was looking forward to them back in my life.
When I looked at the picture I could only see a bush. The boys were not there. I must have stared at the picture for ages thinking what has happened. Why was Christopher and Nicholas not there? I did not say much that day and just slumped around while I looked at the picture. I did not feel like doing anything. I felt so confused and sad.
Mia noticed that I was not smiling and happy. She was surprised when I said that she could cook. She asked me why I was suddenly so distressed. I showed her the photo, and she just sighed and asked what was the big problem. She did not understand why I was obsessed over a picture. If she only knew the reason why
The only reason why the boys disappeared in the picture was because they did not exist in this time dimension. They were conceived from love and the desire to have them in our lives. Things were different this time. It meant the two most important people in my life would now just be a dream.
I mourned that the boys would not be born. It felt as if I killed them. Even the memory of them in the photo was gone. I was sad and depressed. However, this time I did not lock my self in my room. I would just slump around the house and not say much. I started asking myself what would happen now? I got what I wished, but everything was different and everything was worse. This was becoming a nightmare.
Something was different to what I expected. It took some weeks for me to realize what it was. The problem was that Mia did not feel the same way as she done in the first marriage. Yes, I was a much better husband, but her heart was not in the marriage. It was as if married life became a duty for her.
It did not help that one day she told me a guest would be coming for dinner.
He was someone that she knew from her voluntary work. I was shocked when Steen showed up to dinner. He was her new husband before I went back in time. I did not say much and just observed Mia and Steen. It was obvious that they were good friends and had a special connection. Mia was different with him. She lit up and smiled a lot more. When she looked at me, the smile would disappear.
That night I remembered the old woman that let me travel to the past. She did warn me that people would be different and I would make new mistakes. In a way she told me this would be worse than what I had.
I was depressed and sad. Mia and I had an argument after I asked her if she was cheating on me with Steen. Mia shouted that she made a promise to be faithful and will always keep that promise. She did not like my jealousy. We did not speak for days.
When I came home from university one day, there was a note from Mia. She told me that she was leaving me and would be seeking a divorce. Mia admitted that she did not love me and could not remember a time that she did love me. Our marriage was between two immature adults that wanted to play house. The letter finished off by her admitting that our marriage was a mistake.
I tried contacting Mia and telling her that we could work things out. However, she would not listen to me and refused to discuss marriage.
I was once again depressed and hid inside our house. I ended up by moving, hoping that would help, but it did not.
After we were divorced for 14 months, Mia got married to Steen.
As for me, I was once again alone. This time I was very alone, as I did not have children.
A tear ran down my face as I thought of one word
Alone
The End
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