chapter 2 | army man
I felt unsafe without my dad's jacket. It just had this ability to make me completely and utterly calm at all times. But since I gave it to Logan early that Tuesday morning, everything was seeming to piss me off. Logan hadn't been in the hallways all day and wasn't with any of his usual friends.
"Yo, Avelyn, pass the munchies."
"Get it yourself, Mason, you have arms, don't you?
"Watch it."
"Make me."
"Can you guys stop fighting?" One of my other friends, Maddie, grabbed the bag of potato chips and threw it at Mason, spilling all of its contents onto the floor. I snorted and Maddie cracked a smile at me.
"Where's your jacket?" She asked me.
"Leant it to a friend."
"I didn't think I've ever seen you without it."
"Well, now you have."
"It's almost like I can't recognize you," she joked. I didn't find it amusing.
"I can't recognize myself either."
I was silent after that. Nobody seemed to want to talk, knowing that they'll most likely annoy me even more. The joint I was smoking didn't distract me from the fact my jacket wasn't with me.
I often tried not to get attached to things. I used to think attachment was stupid because, in the end, everyone leaves, but that jacket was different.
2:08 PM and there I was, sitting behind the school ditching last period math class because I didn't want to be anywhere at all.
Logan wasn't anywhere to be found, which only made me angry. He knew how much that jacket meant to me, and if he didn't have a good reason for disappearing then I was going to be very upset with him.
"I think I'm going to head to the library," I announced, standing up and handing my blunt to Maddie. She furrowed her brows but accepted it nonetheless.
"You've been by there a lot today," Mason commented, shoving multiple potato chips into his mouth with a questioning look on his face.
"Nice observation, Dipshit."
"You're pushing it."
I rolled my eyes, entering the school building and heading straight to the library to check for Logan. I knew he hadn't stayed home, because I went by his house before school and he wasn't there, Neither was his dad, so the door was locked, but hey- that's what windows are for, right?
Nonetheless, I checked all over the school for him (again) and found that he was still nowhere.
It was 3:37 after school when I heard shouting. I was in the library trying to study for finals but decided to go check what was going on when I recognized one of the voices as Maddie. She's probably just arguing with Mason again, I thought.
I was wrong. Very wrong.
Maddie stood with her arms crossed, a sly smirk on her lips, as she watched Mason poke fun at Logan. There was a crowd forming around them and I struggled to get to the front.
"Hey!Hey!" I shouted, pushing my classmates out of the way to be submitted into the circle. Mason was holding Logan by his collar. "Mason what the hell are you doing!"
"This asshole's got your missing jacket," he commented, looking at me with a serious expression.
"Maybe that's because I lent it to him, you dumbass! Put him down!"
"You've been on edge all day, Ave. What's gotten into you?" Maddie asked. She was stepping closer and closer to me until finally I just snapped.
"All of you just fuck off. Mason, leave him alone. We're going now." A smirk made its way onto Maddie's lips as I reached for Logan's hand.
"I thought you didn't swear."
"I thought you were a semi-decent person."
"Ouch."
"Up yours, Maddie."
"My pleasure."
the conversation took a sour turn. I was screaming at this point and Maddie was trying to contain her giggles. And then I got frustrated- and before I knew it there was a loud cracking sound erupting from Maddie's face.
Mason was looking at me, dropping his grip on Logan before rushing over, shoving me away from his girlfriend with a firm line across his face.
I had punched her, straight in the nose. Blood splattered on my hand, knuckles full of proof for what I'd done. And when her body flew to the ground and Maddie screeched in pain, I didn't feel sorry about hurting her at all.
It was when I saw Logan's face, that's when I felt sorry. He looked fucking terrified of me. And all I could do was look between him and the girl being protected, shaking my head and holding my hand close to my chest because I didn't want him to be scared of me. Logan carefully rose a shaky hand to return my jacket. He wouldn't look me in the eye.
I was doing it for him, I was protecting him and that's the reason I hit her.
"Miss Jacobs," The voice of my English teacher filled my ears. I closed my eyes and let out a shaky breath. "I'll escort you to the Principal's office."
When I arrived at the Principal's he wanted me to say sorry. "But I'm not sorry," I admitted, my eyes dull and lifeless as he handed me a rag to clean the blood off my knuckles.
"Well you should still apologize, whether or not you're sorry is out of the question. You should be sorry. I didn't take you for such a bad kid Miss Jacobs."
"I'm not going to apologize about something I'm proud of doing."
"Quite a mouth you've got on you! How dare you talk to me this way, I'm your principal for god's sake and I am telling you to say sorry to Miss Dwerryhouse."
"I'm not going to."
"Four weeks of detention."
"I liked the feeling of my fist against her nose."
"Six weeks."
"When her blood trickled down my skin I felt relief."
"Seven weeks. You're pushing it, Miss Jacobs."
"I would hit her again-"
"Enough! Ten weeks."
"Why not make it eleven? I'm a bad kid, remember?"
"Thirteen weeks. Leave my office right now."
So I did. I looked the principal straight in the eye as I rose from the chair across from his desk and waltzed out of his office, stuffing my pockets with the candies labeled 'take one' near the door. I snickered.
Logan was waiting for me outside the office. He was sitting in one of the waiting chairs with his head in his hands, clearly stressed and shocked at what I had done. "Hey," I said to him, opening one of the striped mints from my pockets. At least I had my jacket back.
Logan looked at me with the most curious expression, and then he grew angry. "Are you fucking insane? She could've killed you!"
"But she didn't, calm down."
"This is what I'm talking about- you go out and do stupid things without thinking about the consequences. I hate that about you!"
"Well sorry, I'm not perfect."
"Fuck, Avelyn-"
"Language,"
"Don't tell me to watch my language! I'm fucking sick of this! I'm sick of you!"
And that's when I broke. My bottom lip was pulled between my teeth as I bit down on the soft skin hard enough it tore. My eyes darkened, the candy resting in my cheek suddenly wasn't as sweet, and my dad's army jacket just seemed to hang off my body, everything was wrong.
"Then leave." I didn't mean it.
"M-Maybe I will."
"Good."
"Great."
ns 15.158.61.20da2
