hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory387Please respect copyright.PENANA9ZQIR85K86
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 387Please respect copyright.PENANAkF0PcFpJOb
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.387Please respect copyright.PENANARokg8zcAL7
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?387Please respect copyright.PENANA3cs8fsizsc
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.387Please respect copyright.PENANAxXHtynMblV
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.387Please respect copyright.PENANAs9sCMP2pz9
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.387Please respect copyright.PENANAxqwvSQoNbd
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.387Please respect copyright.PENANAN6ZN6ClygD
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?387Please respect copyright.PENANAXSOB4S8ITT
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.387Please respect copyright.PENANAd8QvK4ce1P
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.387Please respect copyright.PENANApu7QWuMfe1
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.387Please respect copyright.PENANA9yfXqo6q2D
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 387Please respect copyright.PENANAUQRMvF8ji1
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.387Please respect copyright.PENANApO0i4rWhKD
girl bestie? - coco <3387Please respect copyright.PENANAKLYIQWedfx
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.387Please respect copyright.PENANA5kfKVM57U2
age? - seven years old.387Please respect copyright.PENANAZNIZzP9qWk
last person i texted? - idfk.387Please respect copyright.PENANANFy8l5Y5ub
last person i called? - probably my little brother.387Please respect copyright.PENANANEPSQOE2Aw
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?387Please respect copyright.PENANAEve3n0GtHc
random fact? - i like food.387Please respect copyright.PENANAMwoRxc3Fm6
single or taken? - big, fat taken.387Please respect copyright.PENANAGFxNjXZMNt
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.387Please respect copyright.PENANAIJebDJwXC9
first kiss? - bitch wtf?387Please respect copyright.PENANARb7EOaiJkU
ever smoked? - nope.387Please respect copyright.PENANAtuq43pY7DV
ever done drugs? - nope~387Please respect copyright.PENANADF9rIgSazJ
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.387Please respect copyright.PENANAKB24os4Arc
longest relationship? - five and a half months.387Please respect copyright.PENANACvMrC1OgWm
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.387Please respect copyright.PENANAt3kSHyhuJp
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.387Please respect copyright.PENANAKN9S7YHAvA
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.387Please respect copyright.PENANAwVvarIib7R
obsession? - kpop.387Please respect copyright.PENANAEB1bEfmN63
do you give second chances? - that depends.387Please respect copyright.PENANAFe4Wthx2aR
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?387Please respect copyright.PENANACQw4B902g3
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.387Please respect copyright.PENANAjpTvPjMhls
day or night? - idk.387Please respect copyright.PENANAZQv5FRlEzp
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.387Please respect copyright.PENANA4arTaVE2ed
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.387Please respect copyright.PENANAHUScoPuPut
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.387Please respect copyright.PENANAH5pxWtdlsS
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.387Please respect copyright.PENANAvvi57NgiN8
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.387Please respect copyright.PENANAFiszamUJPq
favourite movie(s)? - idk.387Please respect copyright.PENANAPvImbDESUa
current mood? - bored and tired.387Please respect copyright.PENANAO7HcoZTdFJ
jealous of? - a lot of things.387Please respect copyright.PENANAZCb4RX4hrD
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.387Please respect copyright.PENANA5pndzHBJK1
pets? - two dogs.387Please respect copyright.PENANAjr7N9pFEqt
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.387Please respect copyright.PENANAuNyhvMQKew
favourite number? - seven.387Please respect copyright.PENANAvGfvHHkimR
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.387Please respect copyright.PENANAP9ohvmLwrq
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.387Please respect copyright.PENANAfx3q9Rhlo7
afraid of the dark? - yes.387Please respect copyright.PENANAN8ViYwhSo7
one wish? - to be happy for real.387Please respect copyright.PENANAPBC66WveyF
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?387Please respect copyright.PENANAwudast5E6C
~387Please respect copyright.PENANA3EAX3wTHip
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.387Please respect copyright.PENANAMzAO9TRwxT
age? - i'm still seven years old.387Please respect copyright.PENANAvbDAW09oPw
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.387Please respect copyright.PENANAQN3MNcbouC
something you hate about yourself? - my body.387Please respect copyright.PENANAyzfZks4R33
something you like about yourself? - idk.387Please respect copyright.PENANAik16TWJ3u1
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.387Please respect copyright.PENANARFaoSxGyON
favourite band? - bts.387Please respect copyright.PENANAz2Fizle1X8
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!387Please respect copyright.PENANAZ5yWbNPDAY
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.387Please respect copyright.PENANAy4BbN6CyYu
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.387Please respect copyright.PENANAPUeTyLMgdG
girl crush? - emmi.387Please respect copyright.PENANAp4JgpdWtyS
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.387Please respect copyright.PENANApDNYPeUTiq
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^387Please respect copyright.PENANAqUfB13Bw2c
talents? - singing.387Please respect copyright.PENANA9trXFCGbI4
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.387Please respect copyright.PENANAj1MaVnKnVh
someone i love? - emmi.387Please respect copyright.PENANAEjcWeiDKH1
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.387Please respect copyright.PENANATZYUZNiyRl
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.387Please respect copyright.PENANAVDwDNLGjTk
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.387Please respect copyright.PENANAoHp2tJbqJ7
favourite animal? - dogs.387Please respect copyright.PENANA2EbnMInbWC
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 387Please respect copyright.PENANA3vrDCwejft
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.387Please respect copyright.PENANAONRCNOAPws
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.387Please respect copyright.PENANAE6bbq0SXA5
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.387Please respect copyright.PENANAGvwnFU56KA
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.387Please respect copyright.PENANAOQTCsCu05r
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 387Please respect copyright.PENANA28ZwVzLRNd
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.387Please respect copyright.PENANADsH2SKNtR5
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.387Please respect copyright.PENANAMKnKQe4FRu
~387Please respect copyright.PENANAMkr7dOUoMc
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.387Please respect copyright.PENANAGPkoKjjwcz
country? - i don't live on earth. 387Please respect copyright.PENANAuBwqPw9egO
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.387Please respect copyright.PENANAfLKcIrqZe6
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.387Please respect copyright.PENANADdHfnP9py3
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.387Please respect copyright.PENANALCiURLRzPR
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.387Please respect copyright.PENANAcBXYHcCMRq
country with your favourite accent? - australia.387Please respect copyright.PENANAc574kEynjy
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.387Please respect copyright.PENANADruybpdUVr
dog or cat person? - both.387Please respect copyright.PENANA0dkDbM9A87
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.387Please respect copyright.PENANAgiSFYHHFuw
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.387Please respect copyright.PENANAtlRxy53pzl
do you belive in God? - idk.387Please respect copyright.PENANAcsgTGrMF5K
single or taken? - taken.387Please respect copyright.PENANAJGZ2la9qBh
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*387Please respect copyright.PENANA07zuV3cb4W
birthday year? - 1930.387Please respect copyright.PENANAuActI9bKk0
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.387Please respect copyright.PENANAanrh9ZUSZg
age? - what's that?387Please respect copyright.PENANAJ5yL8Uvs7k
enthinicity? - african american.387Please respect copyright.PENANAZ59IORBXBc
tea or coffee? - neither.387Please respect copyright.PENANATTfUKC22M5
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.387Please respect copyright.PENANAQ71rzNBUEp
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*387Please respect copyright.PENANAIZhzCyNgix
favourite food? - ice cream.387Please respect copyright.PENANAw2mW2qoMBU
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 387Please respect copyright.PENANA8LNBeSIlwa
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.387Please respect copyright.PENANA341LjnGilc
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.387Please respect copyright.PENANASLXpDAHNh6
favourite soda? - sprite.387Please respect copyright.PENANACc03wH1Srw
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.387Please respect copyright.PENANAJDaqIcJHRX
can you swim? - yes, wtf?387Please respect copyright.PENANApSEhVswgeh
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.387Please respect copyright.PENANAye3rft8Arl
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.387Please respect copyright.PENANAfB7pV1XCgD
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.387Please respect copyright.PENANAabx2nzFMot
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.387Please respect copyright.PENANA5pnVEFqVBr
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*387Please respect copyright.PENANAigHdoZJudr
apple or andriod? - apple.387Please respect copyright.PENANAc7jwyH2gdz
best dessert? - mochi.387Please respect copyright.PENANAT20k76ZbMi
~387Please respect copyright.PENANAhsGnvf7jv3
have you ever:387Please respect copyright.PENANALCSXVRWu9A
1. skipped class? - yes.387Please respect copyright.PENANAXQzamDZqK3
2. done drugs? - no.387Please respect copyright.PENANA0Ml3O3L9LU
3. self-harmed? - yes.387Please respect copyright.PENANACvD6tttfQR
4. drank? - no.387Please respect copyright.PENANAe5xYQDDCW6
5. shoplifted? - yes.387Please respect copyright.PENANAXBXFPSS2mz
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.387Please respect copyright.PENANAaMjiw0tVlT
7. broken up with someone? - yes.387Please respect copyright.PENANAkGEdjLDdiH
what's your favourite:387Please respect copyright.PENANA7UwfukpVOr
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.387Please respect copyright.PENANAgIJqG2NOeH
9. movie? - break the silence.387Please respect copyright.PENANAU84EHzYNbK
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.387Please respect copyright.PENANApcxgAFWklp
11. artist? - bts.387Please respect copyright.PENANA2998TpftCa
12. singer or band? - bts.387Please respect copyright.PENANAd3DWTerPyw
13. memory? - idk.387Please respect copyright.PENANAmdR5A9yr1k
14. book? - the cruel prince.387Please respect copyright.PENANAf3dVdiXZ0l
this or that:387Please respect copyright.PENANAaXP99plxT4
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.387Please respect copyright.PENANAFU1Td32ZMN
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.387Please respect copyright.PENANAPLaPDbXoc8
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.387Please respect copyright.PENANAa7INk2agqS
18. movies or books? - idk.387Please respect copyright.PENANAwxEZ444idX
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.387Please respect copyright.PENANAWcRgQAum9k
20. blind of deaf? - blind.387Please respect copyright.PENANAJZKZGYdnc5
21. tea or coffee? - neither.387Please respect copyright.PENANAvtJWIh10bH
what's your:387Please respect copyright.PENANA0TigIzPJJu
22. age? - ninety-one.387Please respect copyright.PENANAAmqx51DT1c
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.387Please respect copyright.PENANAD38yuGdtEU
24. height? - 4'11.387Please respect copyright.PENANA8EAUcHsghW
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.387Please respect copyright.PENANAfdkYKcIgGo
26. shoe size? - seven.387Please respect copyright.PENANAYRnFW5OPSc
27. religion? - i'm not religious.387Please respect copyright.PENANACH1BJUcslk
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.387Please respect copyright.PENANA50qt7QGL5x
opinion on: 387Please respect copyright.PENANAXlJS3xhDJ7
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...387Please respect copyright.PENANA2GkckJfRuR
30. second chances? - it depends.387Please respect copyright.PENANAqh1KQFpU6h
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.387Please respect copyright.PENANAwb4YPUomna
32. abortion? - ew.387Please respect copyright.PENANAlbkSwcMpIA
33. a death penalty? - ew.387Please respect copyright.PENANAc3mbWCQdH3
34. marijuana? - i likes that.387Please respect copyright.PENANAsTzs8jQ5Fc
35. love? - what's love?387Please respect copyright.PENANAnWwKF8Yx5F
do you:387Please respect copyright.PENANAxWtYrorRuT
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.387Please respect copyright.PENANAPCJMIv3Yq8
387Please respect copyright.PENANAWGnteZddJA
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3387Please respect copyright.PENANAn0dcNpxs0g