It was heavy.
Everything was heavy.
The seemingly delicate earrings hanging from her lobes weighed far more than they appeared, their gently glittering opals pulling down her ears more than she would have liked. The necklace at her throat was decorated with the same opals, but this too, like the earrings, wore her down. As though a great boulder was sitting upon her chest, the gold was so dense its presence and quiet weight was impossible to ignore.606Please respect copyright.PENANAw5yo8JFgDq
606Please respect copyright.PENANACnfbtFmScu
She much preferred the simple, delicate silver locket she used to wear, but that was now considered far too lowly for a Queen such as herself to be sporting.
The crown was the heaviest. Smaller than her husbands, she expected to be able to bear it gracefully. Now she was afraid her neck would break or she would tear a muscle. The gilded jewels were large and opulent, surrounded by magnificent gold work and elaborate detail. It was horrendously hard to bear.
She turned her head slowly, carefully, turning to gaze at her husband on her left. His throne was higher, more intricately carved and his crown was probably a thousand times heavier than her own. He appeared to be dealing with the weight of it all about as well as she was.
How she longed to reach out and take his hand, how she wanted so desperately for him to lean over and kiss her cheek and tell her to go to their bedchamber and wait for him there... She wanted things to be as they were before. Before he became king and made her queen, back when they had their estate in Yorkshire and they could do whatever they wanted, whenever they pleased.
She missed him, especially at night when he had to go back to a separate bed chamber at the other end of whatever palace they happened to be in. She loathed the too-big bed with the vast, empty space beside her that she woke up to every morning. How could one person possibly need a bed of such size? It was ridiculous.
She missed him, and he was right there beside her. She felt further apart than she had when she was here, in England, and he was in France fighting wars.
She wanted her son with her. She wanted to watch him as he played in the grounds... but now he had nurse maids for that, and she was expected to do other more important things than mother her child.606Please respect copyright.PENANABfbF7olDBP
Edward was a frail boy, sickly and prone to winter illnesses. She was never allowed near him when he took ill. When he was confined to his bed with a fever, the doctors were reluctant to let herself and her husband in to see him. They were his parents, and they were forced to be absent by a man in a long coat with some vague idea of medical knowledge and a family he was allowed to go home to each night.606Please respect copyright.PENANAp2gOVZR8aR
Anne watched the crowd before her, and wondered how many of them wanted this. Wanted a throne, and a crown, power and riches...
How naive they must be, she mused to herself. It is perhaps the worst curse in the world. Surrounded by a thousand individuals, and never allowed to be oneself. Never allowed to show any emotion - be it hatred, sadness or love - and forbidden from nursing her sick child back to health or embracing her husband.
Never is one so alone as one wears a gilded crown.606Please respect copyright.PENANAy7ecMhnvq5
Nothing is so lonely as sitting upon the throne of England.606Please respect copyright.PENANAEuT4b04qdS
a/n - 'Anne' is based on Anne Neville, wife to Richard III. Their son Edward died in 1483, whilst he was in the North and his parents were on royal progress.606Please respect copyright.PENANAi5n1n0fQwW
Kings and queens always slept in separate bedchambers, but Richard and Anne decided they wanted to sleep in the same bed. When she became ill, the doctors had to effectively ban Richard from sharing a bed with his wife lest he become ill himself. This was extremely unusual for a royal medieval couple, so much so that their contemporaries often remarked about how often the king and queen shared a bed. This, among other things, is what has led to the belief that there was a genuine love between Richard and Anne, something fairly rare for marriages at the time.