It was my lunch period. I sat alone at a table in the back of the lunchroom where nobody could see me. I wanted to go outside, but there were too many people. It would draw too much attention. I unlocked my phone and began to read the book I had been reading again. Something then happened that I didn't expect; Something that never happened to me, like- ever. Usually people tried to stay away from me. I was the "quiet kid" often that intimidated people so they avoided me, but for some reason, when I looked up Razmus was sitting across from me. I raised an eyebrow and tilted my head.
"Razmus?" I asked.
"A?" He replied and mocked my exact face and position. I laughed a bit.
"Hi- sorry; people usually don't sit with me, so I was confused for a second," I stated. Razmus smiled.
"It's fine- I wanted to thank you for earlier and..." Razmus said but began to trail off.
"And?" I asked.
"None of my friends are in my lunch period.." Razmus finished.
"Oh- well I mean you can stay here with me then; I'm only reading a book on my phone anyways so- nothing important here," I offered. Razmus smiled.
"Thanks!" He said. I smiled back at him. I didn't understand why I could talk to him so easily or why I didn't feel uncomfortable when talking to him. "So- you don't like your name.. Have you thought of coming up with a new one?" 262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrbqLvPNK5i
I shook my head, no.262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWKxr0rN3Ui
"I could help you pick a new one?" Razmus suggested. I smiled slightly.
"I actually like that idea," I replied. Razmus nodded and gave a bright smile.
"You know- I changed my name too," Razmus stated. I tilted my head.
"Oh?" I said curiously. He laughed a bit.
"I was born a female, but I didn't feel female. Ever since I was little I've felt masculine and I've felt like a- well not a girl, you know? When I was seven I told my parents I wanted to be a boy and everything immediately clicked in their minds," Razmus stated. "My parents then sat me down later that day and told me that they thought I was trans and explained what that was. By the time I was 10 I was 100% sure I was meant to be a boy. I cut my hair, and dressed masculine and just right before I hit puberty I was put on hormone blockers so I didn't grow- well so my chest didn't grow larger," Razmus paused a moment, "I eventually got on T, or testosterone and I'm getting off of it in three years," I stared in disbelief.
"That's so cool!" I stated, super stoked. "I've never thought about gender identity like that," I said as I pondered the idea of being trapped inside of something I wasn't meant to be. "Could you explain more to me?"262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzGIiKzF07
Razmus sat up straight.
"Sure- let's start with gender identities-" Razmus explained the many gender identities to me for the remainder of the lunch period. "I know it's not my place to tell you what your gender identity- and by all means! Correct me if I'm entirely wrong, but um.. I don't think you're cis-gender, A,"
I nodded and pondered the idea even more.
"Think about it" Razmus said, "When you think of yourself, do you think of yourself as female or male?"
"Not really.. When I think of myself I kind of just think of myself as... Well, me-you know? I don't imagine myself with a gender," I replied.262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8VongElkFM
"That's non-binary, A,"
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A/N: Thank you everyone who has been reading my story for staying! I'm really trying my best to relate this story to actual facts and my own experiences with being in the trans spectrum- let me know if there's anything I'm missing! I love getting feedback to help me improve my own writing and my own knowledge. Feel free to educate me on something I may not know and don't feel the need to stay quiet about it! Thank you again!
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