During vacation I wanted the college to open but now sitting in college I wait for the weekend. Phoebus was not leaving any chance for asking me to be his friend. He is very irritating, more than Bella. I don't know why he doesn't understand that I don't want to be his friend, I just don't.
"Are you sure you don't need any help?" A deep voice came from behind just as I opened my mouth to have the first bite of my brownie.
"In eating brownies?" I joked.
"I won't mind." His replies remain flattering as usual.
"But I was talking about studies. You seem distracted these days." He replied, sliding a chair back to sit beside me.
"Why are you like this?" I frowned at the smirk on his face.
"Like what?"
"I don't know, but like..."
"Irritating?" He tried to help me find a word to describe him. I stared for a bit.
I hesitated but slightly nodded, looking down.
"I like irritating you. That frown, eyes, pinned lips I like." He kept staring at me. I tried not to look at him at the same time so as not to look surprised.
Looking at my brownie I asked about the reason behind him being desperate to help me.
"I don't want someone smart like you lagging behind in studies. You are one of the brilliant students in our class." He stated the fact that I do agree.
"Even though I am, you are not. How can you help me with it?" I joked to lighten my surroundings.
His stare was enough for me.
I gulped and agreed to his offer. I asked him about the place where we could study. He replied with a smile "Anywhere just not a library."
I could stare at his smile longer but the bell rang louder than it usually does.
I smiled back and left for my class.
I just want Bella back as soon as possible otherwise I will get crazy.
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Reaching home, I asked my mother about the group study with him. As expected, she stared for sometime but then accepted highlighting, ‘JUST FOR STUDIES’. I wished she would never accept that proposal but it made me happy or a little more than happy which I obviously didn't show infront of her.
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My cheek looked red, maybe it was the reflection of something in the mirror. The colourful topics in my journal were filled with Phoebus and I didn't even know the reason behind. On every page I wrote about him irritating me,about his mischievous smile, his eyes. I needed a break but instead I am going to have a study session with him.One thing that could help me was the mighty god whom we worship at the dining table for giving us everything we want, unmaterialistic but i guess, once I wished for Phoebus being in my life which he took really serious. I really had mixed feelings about our study together. Should I be happy about studying with my crush or sad because I am studying with my friend’s boyfriend? Hopefully Bella won’t mind us being a partner, Study Partner. I would have never minded about my boyfriend being a study partner with my friend, until she has a crush on him and I know it because I can’t afford to lose the people I love, neither my boyfriend nor my friend.
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At the dining table, the first thing I was asked about was Phoebus. It wasn’t like I didn’t expect that but still it was sudden, too sudden. I stared and blabbered for sometime but then I specified that he was the boyfriend of one of my friends. I couldn't tell the name as my mother could tell Bella’s mother about it and then she would be grounded for next few weeks which I could not handle. I just wanted to end this group study as soon as possible, I wasn't ready for the daily questions about him by my family. The worst it could get was my mother telling about him in our next gathering and my aunts making scenarios of me being his wife like they did to one of my brothers when his mother told about him having a crush on his teacher. He still gets teased by everyone, I wasn't ready for that and I don't want to be too.233Please respect copyright.PENANAC3tPEzNsLX
I had to inform Phoebus about the place suitable for our study before the weekend, but I knew nothing about him except his name. Bella’s phone was unreachable due to which I was unable to contact her and let her know about the study we were planning to do maybe she could join us to make the tension low or no, what if they will be like a too much into each other couple, it would not remain a study session for sure, it would be me watching happily ever after of my best friend and my crush whom I should stop calling my crush anymore.
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Dear Diary,233Please respect copyright.PENANALyI63eHury
I will do anything to avoid this study session233Please respect copyright.PENANA2CG2s8WfTf
with my crush cum, you already know.233Please respect copyright.PENANAdbM4nrZLkB
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Just stop. Close your eyes. Breath. Relax. Try to count the sheeps, which you don’t have but require to have a good sleep.233Please respect copyright.PENANAXbsB2ZTd3b
I was about to sleep peacefully until I heard a knock at my door, it was Alena.233Please respect copyright.PENANAnRwhnTKJ1x
She said that she was sorry to disturb my sleep that late at night but she didn't want our parents to know about us having that conversation. I wasn't ready for such a conversation late at night but her face convinced me. She asked me about Phoebus in a low hissing voice which shivered my whole body. I stared at her with shock for some time. And exclaimed the reason for her presence in my room late at night. I regret even accepting his proposal. She asked me about my feelings towards him even after knowing that he was my friend's boyfriend. My family is really suspicious or I should say they know me pretty well, I don't know. After lots of denial, I told her that I had a crush on him before knowing him being in a relationship. Her face showed questions about me getting over and studying with him, alone. I tried avoiding it before she could ask me directly about it and said that I was sleepy. I sighed loudly after she left the room. Those were very intense and interrogative minutes of my life about which I thought the remaining night.
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Luckily, I didn't have dark circles the next morning.
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It was a sunny day. I could say that because I saw my father’s naked head shining bright directly into my eyes while he was waiting for us near the car. We were going for a family picnic like every Sunday in the outskirts which was miles away from our home. It was breezy and warm at the same time- a perfect kind of weather. You could move freely throughout the green grass, read books, dance, sing, laugh loudly but no one around would ever bother you. Everything stops there. You can close your eyes and feel the birds singing which would make you smile voluntarily.
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The first time we went there was when we initially shifted to the place and had no one to talk to. Father took us there to make us feel loved and he did succeed. We love the place. We saw people getting attracted to it as years passed. It's a good place for an outing, away from one’s messed up life.
I was just running behind the butterflies like I always do until I saw Phoebus. It might be my illusion but I did see him. It was actually him there sitting alone between the grass like an angel in paradise. I was scared of him finding me here with my family and I would be forced to introduce him to them knowing their reactions later that day. I sat quietly beside my parents. They seemed surprised because I never sat with them after coming here but I tried distracting them and myself by talking about the weather which was getting warmer as the time passed. I didn't know whether it was actually getting warm or was it because of him. I never noticed him there before. I saw him leaving the place after some time, he was not looking the same boy like he looked in the college, it was different.
But what was he doing there alone?
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