Elliott was crammed next to Brent at the lunch table. He wanted nothing more than to leave and run away, but that wasn’t an option, not when Natasha was involving him in every single conversation. The group had moved from the big football game to the homecoming dance, and Elliott felt like his ears were clogged with water. He could barely focus enough to hear what any of them were saying.
“Elliott,” Natasha whined. “You’re not paying attention.”
That brought Elliott back to the present, where the redhead was giving him puppy dog eyes and the girl across from him was looking hopeful.
“Sorry. What is happening?”
Natasha seemed fine to catch him up. “Leigh, over there, just asked you to the dance. Will you go?”
Elliott didn’t even hesitate. “No.” Then, he realized how harsh that must have sounded when Leigh’s face dropped and she nearly flinched from the word. “I mean, I’m not going. I have prior obligations that night.”
Which was the truth - Elliott was working the Saturday of the homecoming dance, and while he wasn’t going to be working too far into the night, he would miss the chance to prepare for the dance. He wasn’t upset by this, mostly because he had no urge to participate in school activities. However, the blatant no hadn’t been because he couldn’t make it - he was afraid of Leigh. Of all the girls, save for Natasha, at the table.
“Well, that is too bad. Cheer up, Leigh. We’ll find you someone soon.” Natasha winked at her friend, but that didn’t boost the blonde’s mood.
Elliott was perplexed. Why would anyone want to bring him to the dance? He was basically the shortest guy in the class, he wasn’t handsome, and he never associated with anyone. He didn’t see any appeal in himself, so he was having a hard time understanding how Leigh did.
The conversation flowed from there, and Elliott tried not to comment all that often. It was inevitable, however. And Brent, well Brent hated the fact that Elliott was getting all the attention. He hated that the pea-sized pretty boy was being fawned over by everyone, for no other reason than the fact that Natasha enjoyed his company.
He didn’t understand.
Neither did Elliott.
Practice was even stranger, for Elliott. Suddenly, his team members weren’t picking on him, not even Brent. This was a revelation, and it shocked Elliott to find that he was actually able to concentrate during practice instead of worry how others may sabatose him.
Brent kept his distance for most of practice, but Elliott could sense his stares. Natasha wasn’t on the sidelines this afternoon, so he knew Brent had no reason to be nice to him. Perhaps he was making friends.
Elliott shook his head - he would never make friends.
To add on to the strange afternoon, Elliott arrive at work after practice, still in his sweat pants and a long sleeved t-shirt, looking worn from the drills. When he arrived at the farm, he entered into the small farm stand, which was shockingly quant. An old woman was standing behind the register, helping a customer. He was going to wait in line, but then he heard his voice, and he froze. He’d only heard the voice once, but suddenly he knew exactly who it belonged to.
Elliott turned to face Wes, who was wearing a wife beater and shorts. He was out back, doing something, but Elliott couldn’t focus on anything except for Wes. His wheat colored hair was sticking up all over the place, and his tan face had beads of sweat, proving that he’d been hard at work earlier.
Elliott commanded himself to move. You’re fine. Stop being afraid. Stop being a pretty boy, like you always are. Stop being a girl.
He walked out back and stood next to Wes, trying to calm himself down. Wes wouldn’t hurt him - this was different. Wes wasn’t mother, nor was he someone mother had hired. Wes just wanted him to work, that was all.
“You’re going to be mighty hot in those pants.” Wes noted before turning back to the task at hand. He was kneading dough, though Elliott didn’t know why.
“I just came back from practice.” Was all Elliott could utter.
Wes gave him a strange look before turning back towards his dough. “I’m making pie crust.You mind giving a hand?” Elliott didn’t, so he slid on some gloves and began to help work on the pie, trying to tell his erratic heart rate to slow down. Wes wasn’t going to hurt him - he didn’t need to be afraid.
“Tell me about yourself, Elliott.” Wes was trying to make small talk, but Elliott couldn’t seem to focus on what was happening. He shouldn’t be so tense right now, but he chalked that up to nerves.
“Well, I have two brothers. I’m a senior. That’s about it.”
Wes shook his head. “No it’s not. Tell what you like to do other than soccer. Tell me about your childhood and everything.”
Wes was digging too deep, and Elliott began to grow scared. Did he know? Who told him? Had it happened when he fainted?
“Uh, I like science class.” This felt weird to Elliott. He never talked about himself, ever. “I don’t really like soccer, I’m just good at it. It helps me blend it. I like to play the guitar.” That was also true. Elliott had never owned a guitar, but as a child, he would sneak into the band room at school and play the guitars. He’d taught himself, but he hadn’t played in years.
“See, that wasn’t too hard.” Wes grinned. “I’ve always grown up on the farm, so I didn’t participate in sports, I never had the time. I always liked history, and thought about going to college for it, but the farm is more important, so I couldn’t. My family needs me to work, which is hard on me but there’s nothing I can do.” He sent a grin my way. “And I love to play the guitar as well.”
Elliott couldn’t explain the feeling in his chest, the way it tightened at these words. For once, he actually felt included, and not in the way that Natasha included him. This felt real.
It’d only been ten minutes and Elliott felt way too attached to Wes. It was unnatural and strange. It was like he wanted to be friends, and now he realized what he’d been missing.
He hated it. It didn’t feel natural. He wanted to escape this feeling of longing for a friendship. He needed to run, to leave, to never look back, but that wasn’t an option.
“I’ll show you around.” Wes decided, taking off his gloves and and threw them in the trash. Elliott followed suit and swallowed his fear. This time he wasn’t afraid that Wes would hurt him, no, he was afraid they were going to become friends.
Elliott was afraid of relationships. He was afraid of friends. Of growing close to others. He was afraid, and he needed to protect himself. He needed to prove that he didn’t need others.
“This is the store front. Everything we sell is in here. Let me bring you to the farm.”
Elliott followed Wes out of the store front, where he entered, and out around back to where the farm began. Acres of land spread out in front of him, and Elliott felt small. Insignificant. Excited. He could see the love for the farm on Wes’s face, and it was obvious he loved it. Wes didn’t care about not going to college - he loved the farm and the store too much. Elliott could see it on his face.
Elliott had never seen anyone so passionate about anything ever. He’d never seen real, raw love.
It hurt him. Pained him to see this.
Wes brought him back to the store where they made three pie crusts out back. It had been going smoothly, so smoothly, until Elliott heard the voice he’d been hiding from. Mother’s voice rang loud and clear from outside of the store, and the hairs on his neck stood up. His heart began to beat so hard in his chest he felt it would jump right out, and Wes noticed.
“Are you alright?”
Elliott shook his head and he peeked into the front of the store. It was empty, but Elliott could hear her voice. She was talking to someone, and Elliott was determined to find her. He moved away from Wes and towards the exit. He poked his head out, looking, but saw no one.
Still, her voice was loud and clear.
Elliott left the store completely, heading towards the front. She must have been standing in the parking lot, waiting for him. And as he walked towards the front, Elliott could only hear her voice. Almost as if she was coaxing him forward with her words of praise and love. Elliott resented it.
Elliott wanted it. He wanted her love.
Elliott entered the parking lot, but there was no one. And suddenly, he couldn’t hear her voice. He’d lost her. He’d been so close, but she was gone. Almost like she’d never been there in the first place.
Wes placed a hand on Elliott’s shoulder. “Where were you running off to?”
Elliott couldn’t speak. He just looked into Wes’s eyes, begging him not to ask questions. And Wes immediately understood, bowing his head and leading them back into the store.
Elliott couldn’t feel more thankful. And Elliott felt even more so when Wes started diverting the attention from Elliott’s moment to how much Wes loved working in the store. The entire time, all Elliott could think was that he’d never met a person like Wes. He was so involved in his work, and he loved it. He loved his grandmother running the store front. He loved the customers. He loved everything about the farm and the store. It was hard to Elliott to understand - he loved nothing, except his brothers.
He was beginning to realize there was a world full of love and wonder, and Elliott had missed the plane ride there. Elliott had missed every plane available, and now he was stuck in the world he’d made for himself. A world lacking love and emotion. A world lacking his real identity.410Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPE3C51DYGt
