2 years ago – Jimin P.O.V
“It’s pretty easy for you to talk Jimin. You’re already indeed popular meanwhile I’m not so it’s harder for me , you know?” I nodded understanding what she means. I know it must be hard for her. Not only the fact that she finds it hard to talk to other people, but the fact that she’s actually scared she wouldn’t be able to get over her fears.
Ever since her parents death she became a really introverted person. She prefers to keep all her emotions inside and barely opening up about her thought. She wasn’t always like that tho. And I’m not blaming her for becoming like this.
Mina was just a little girl when her parents passed away, it did hurt her a lot, of course it did, but as a kid she couldn’t understand the gravity of the situation. All she knew was that her parents are now her angels.
Kids at school started talking, they started to pity her for her loss and she didn’t like it at all. Short after, her name became the number one gossip among our colleagues. She didn’t want to be in the center of attention. So she reserved herself, becoming the quite girl In the corner of the room.
Until now, i tried my best to help her as best as I could, I encouraged her every time she wanted to give up, I picked her up every time she dragged herself down. I wanted my best friend back so bad. But to be honest, sometimes I can’t help but feel sick of all of this, thinking that she’s gone, forever, and that even tho I try to get her back, I can’t. I wanted to give up so many times… but all those memories, our memories, our childhood…all those images flashing before my eyes… I can’t throw them away just like that. I have to stay strong for the sake of both of us.
This time I didn’t know what to tell her so I just nodded my head.
The bell started ringing indicating us that is time for another class to start.
The noisy hallways were now even more noisy as students hurry to their classes. She glued her head on the blue metal of her locker, probably regretting her life choices. A vague smile appeared on my face. I can’t help but stare at her. I miss her so much even tho she’s right in front of me.
I snapped out of my trance at the sound of a voice calling my name.
“New friends I see” She said, keeping her voice low and monotone. To me it sounded more sad, almost scared. I hope she doesn’t think I’m replacing her because I would never.
“Yeah…” I scratched the back of my head, lifting the corner of my lips in a faint smile “Anyway, don’t be so hard on yourself from now on. Everything is going to be okey. You’ll see” I patted her head lifting my backpack on my right shoulder and leaving for my class. I didn’t know what else to say to her.
As I turned around I saw Taehyung waving at me. The moment our eyes met he pointed to his right, signaling that the other boys already left and they’re waiting for us.
“She’s still in a bad mood?”Taehyung whispered close to my ear so no one else would hear. He’s one of my best friends. All of them knows Mina’s situation. We agreed to never talk about this at school, to avoid other people from hearing things they don’t need to know, and history to repeat itself.
The path to our class was quiet. None of us said anything. I just continued thinking. We both looked at this whole highschool thing as a new journey. She was so excited but all she does know is losing time. I wished we could’ve been hanging out with our friends, not only the two of us all the time. I love her, I really do but I have my life too. I can’t always be with her 24/7.
At some point I wanted to introduce her too my friends, I thought she’ll be more comfortable with them since they know me, but it’s not as wast as it sounds. And it’s not because of her this time.
I dropped myself on my seat, put my head on the desk and closing my eyes. How I wish I could sleep right now. My head hurt like hell.
“Where have you been? What took you so much?” Namjoon, the other best friend of mine bombarded us with questions. I muffled groan left my throat. I’m really not in the mood to be interrogated in this moment.
“Jimin was talking with Mina in the hallways. It was pretty crowded so it was a little difficult to find him” Taehyung explained to him.
“Oh, you’re still talking to the nerd ? I didn’t know. Thought you actually found some real chick to have some fun with.” Namjoon smirked, wiggling his eyebrows teasingly
I raised my head looking at him with a deep frown on my face. I clenched my hand into a fist at his words. It took everything in me to not hit that goddamn table and attract everyone else’s unwanted attention.
“Stop talking shit about her dude. She’s not perfect but she’s still like my sister so you shut the fuck up” I barked at him, keeping my voice low and deep.
He raised his hands up in defense, lips pursed in a straight line and eyebrows raised up. A shocked expression crossing his face.
“Easy there, Tarzan. At some point you’ll realize you’re wasting your time and energy for nothing. She can’t be changed, she will never. And I think you know that too, the only problem is that you don’t want to accept it.” This time I didn’t said anything, averting my gaze from him and staring at the floor instead. I never thought at this before. Maybe I knew all of this from the beginning, I just didn’t want to accept it.
“So, next week we throw a party at Hoseok’s. Wanna give up on your problematic old life and start a new, better one?” Namjoon asked with a wide smile spread on his face.
I want to. I really do want to. I thought for a minute tho. I don’t have to give up on her entirely. I just need to focus on my own life a little bit more.
“Yeah, sure.” I agreed, faking a smile and hi5ing him. I’m not really confident in my decision to be honest although I’m excited to try new thing with new people.
I’m not pushing her to the side either. Actually, I really do want to convince them she’s really friendly despite her shyness and she’ll make a really good friend to them too if they give her a chance.
This is my ultimate goal. The only thing that remains to be done. This is the last war I’m willing to fight into. My feeling are confusing me right know, I don’t know what to do or how to feel. If it doesn’t work… I don’t know what will happen…
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