Glen stood at the front of the ferry, her hands on the railing as she stared out into the distance at the town of Bright Falls. It was a quaint little place, with old banners still up for something called 'Deer Fest'. Glen smiled at that, reminded of her old hometown of Bridges. It seemed such a long way away now.
"Hey, Dream-girl."
Sighing, Glen said, "Yes, Claudia?"
Claudia stopped, raising an eyebrow at Glen. "You did it again."
"Did what again?"
"Every time you say something to me, there's just that little nervous hesitation. It's weird to think of someone walking on eggshells around me."
"Not that unusual." Glen said with a laugh. "Everyone in the warehouse of my reality's a bit … nervous around you. Same way you're nervous around Missus Dreemurr."
"But Missus Dreemurr is the caretaker of the …" Claudia's eyes went wide. "Oh."
"Don't worry; you do a great job. You brought me onto the team, though we do have a tendency to argue."
"We do?"
"Yeah. Like the time I found Yoshiaki Manabe's guitar."
"Lead guitarest of the Pillows?" Claudia asked.
"Right in one. Awesome little toy there; has a built in amp with an in-built generator. When you hit someone with it, with the generator going, of course, the impact is magnified one-hundred fold." Cracking a grin, Glen said, "Sucker makes for a killer solo too. I wanted to keep it, but you made it pretty clear there wasn't going to be a negotiation. Never really knew why."
Chuckling again, Glen said, "Then you took control of the radio. Now I think I get it. It's so strange to see you so … well … human."
Claudia's smile faded. "I'm pretty stiff as a caretaker, huh?"
Shrugging, Glen said, "Hey, it comes with the job. Still, sometimes, after bringing in an artifact, I'd get you talking about the old times. That's how I know about Jinx, Pete, and Myka … though I have to tell you, Artie's a human in my reality. The previous caretaker was as well; Missus Fredricks, you called her. Never met her myself, but you seemed fond enough of her."
Now it was Claudia who smiled. She leaned on the railing. "I don't suppose you could just tell me about some of the cool swag we bring in around your time."
"Well, some of it's on the list, to be honest." Leaning closer to Claudia, Glen said in a low tone, "I'm hoping to save your Warehouse from some of the more interesting accidents from my own time. That's why I put the legos on the first list; for such a small, simply toy, those bastards put up one hell of a fight."
"I know the bastards hurt when you step on them barefoot." Claudia caught Glen's curious look and said, "Myka bought Pete a lego pirate ship for their anniversary. It's strangely adorable to see him try and stick the pieces up his nose to impress her."
Claudia and Glen laughed at this until Jinx asked, "So, what are you ladies talking about?"
"Pete's unusual mating habits." Glen said with a grin. "I was just filling Claudia in on her alternate self."
"Oh." Jinx said, looking as though he weren't sure what to think about that. "Am I still around?"
"Before my time." Glen said, "But she told me about you, Jinxie. The human lie-detector. So it's not like an artifact power or anything?"
"No," Jinx said, joining them at the railing. "Just something I've always had, like Pete's vibes, Myka's eye for detail, and Artie's ability to locate cookies within a ten-meter radius."
They shared a chuckle at that. Glen stood up and popped her back with a sigh as the ferry drew close to the landing. The town ahead looked inviting, though she did notice one discrepancy.
"Say," Glen said, turning to face their car. "Where is Sans?"
"Asleep in the car." Claudia said, jerking a thumb at the vehicle.
Glen chuckled and shook her head. "Some things never change. Say, is my gear in the car?"
"Artie said-" Jinx began.
"-Not in public, I know. Artifacts are one thing, but my equipment's from an alternate future. Nah, I just wanna grab my glasses."
Claudia gave her a look. "They're just glasses, right?"
"Mostly, yes." Glen said as she approached the back of the car, "I modified them a bit, yeah, but nothing crazy. Zoom feature, night-vision, and Flux-scan. Could come in handy … plus I'm a little near-sighted."
There was a thud from within the trunk moments before Glen's hand touched the handle.
"Wait!" Jinx said, a worried look on his face. "That wasn't me."
"Huh?"
"I didn't hit the button."
Claudia, Jinx, and Glen all stared down at the trunk for a long moment before another thud sounded from within. They quickly gathered around the trunk, Claudia and Jinx drawing their teslas after making sure the ferry driver and the other riders weren't looking their way. Nodding at them, Glen threw the trunk open to reveal a skeleton wearing an apron that said 'Bone Apetite!'
"Oh, hello!" The Papyrus from the UNDR-Ground said cheerily as he sat up. "Are we there yet? I am simply famished!"
"Papyrus?" Glen said, eyes wide. "What … what are you doing here?"
"Why, I'm here to assist you, of course!" After Glen helped Papyrus out of the trunk, the skeleton chef continued, "Of course, I forgive you for leaving me behind; this hunting for artifacts thing is very exciting, and I'm sure it was simply an oversight during a moment of excitement."
"Uh, yeah." Glen said uncertainly. "Sorry about that. I just didn't want to, uh, presume upon your greatness."
Papyrus gave a great laugh. "Not to worry; I am ever happy to assist in your endeavors. So … what is it we are going again?"
"Lookin' for black goop." Sans said, hanging out of the window. "Hey, bro. Could you keep it down a little? I'm bone tired."
"Agent brother!" Papyus said, lifting Sans from the car. "This is no time to laze about and make bad jokes. We have an investigation to begin!"
Before anyone could stop him, Papyrus ran to the edge of the ferry and leapt over the remaining few feet of water to the dock beyond. A grinning sun-glasses-wearing Sans tucked under his arm, Papyrus waved the others to follow. "Come on! Adventure awaits!"
"Uh, Pap?" Glen said, pointing at the car.
Pap followed her finger and promptly clapped a hand to the top of his skull. "Ah. Yes, that would make more sense. Come, Sans! The Back-seat awaits!"
The Oh Deer Diner was a comfortable little restaurant with bar-stools around the main counter, old but lovingly tended booths, and a surly-looking fellow in the back grilling burgers. The waitress greeted them with a smile before pouring a cup of coffee for one of the diner patrons, a forest ranger from the cut of his uniform.
"Table of five?" She asked as she turned back to them.
"Yes, please!" Papyrus said before anyone else could respond.
Glen shrugged and nodded in agreement. The waitress showed them to their seats, pulling a table up to the booth to provide room for everyone.
"What can I get you to drink?" She asked.
"Coke. Or Pepsi, Miss …" Glen glanced at the waitress's name embroidered near the collar of her uniform. "Rose. Say, is that Rose Marigold, by any chance?"
"Why yes it is." Rose said, an uncertain smile on her lips. "Do I know you?"
"Probably not." Glen said, "But I've read about you. You were one of the last people to see Alan Wake, right?"
The mere mention of the name 'Alan Wake' made a wave of emotions cross the waitress's face: the joy only capable by the biggest of fans, happiness at potentially meeting another fan, and eventually sadness.
"He was here, you know. He stopped here the night before he vanished." Rose sighed and shook her head. "He was a bit rushed, but still, it was such a thrill, y'know? To meet the man behind all those wonderful stories. Is that why you're all here?"
"Oh, yeah." Claudia said, Jinx wincing at the lie. "He was definitely one of the horror greats, right up there with Stephen King, Clive Barker, and er-"
"Sutter Cane?" Glen suggested with a slight shudder. When everyone looked at her in confusion, she shook her head and said, "Er, never mind. Probably not a good example anyway."
I even had the big cardboard cutout of him here at the diner. Just doing my part to help promote his work." Rose's brow furrowed. "I never did find out who took it. Still, when I heard about the accident … it was like hearing an old friend died, you know? His wife was here for months after, always hoping he'd return, always fearing his body would be found. They dredged Cauldron lake time and time again, you know, but never found anything."
Making a mental note to make Cauldron lake their next stop, Glen said, "I'm sorry, but I have to ask … there's a rumor going around that Alan Wake finished one last book before his disappearance. They say it was found right here."
Rose went completely rigid for a long moment. Worried she'd gone too far, Glen said quickly, "Ah, never mind. I mean, it's probably just a rumor anyway." Quickly looking over the menu, Glen added, "Er, I'll have a Chicken Strip Basket with onion rings instead of fries, if that's okay."
That seemed to snap Rose back into reality. "Uh, right. Sorry; I've been working a long shift. One cola and a cluckbox with rings instead of nails."
She took the orders from the rest of the group quickly before telling them she'd return with their drinks shortly. Once she was away, Agent Sans commented, "That was odd."
"Indeed. Papyrus said, rubbing his jaw. "You would think an establishment such as this would have sweet tea."
"No, I mean the way she froze up when you mentioned the book."
"Yeah, she went completely bye-bye." Claudia said. "Leena said the book tried to suck her in; could it have affected Rose?"
"I don't know, but something tells me bringing it up again is a bad idea."
"Agreed." Glen said. "We've got a lead anyway; Cauldron Lake. I'd like to take a look at that place."
"But if they already dredged the place, what exactly are we supposed to do?"
"I just want a little look. If things are promising, I've got this." Glen pulled a pebble from her pocket and held it up. It looked wholly unremarkable, which made its true nature all the more unusual. "Civet's Pebble. According to legend, it once absorbed the waters of an entire ocean. Seriously pissed off the water dragons."
"Water dragons?" Claudia asked even as the others stared at Glen.
Coughing, Glen said, "Er, this was back in my home dimension."
Glancing at the counter, Glen said, "I could use some local knowledge; be right back."
"Need some what?" Jinx said, but Glen was already approaching the counter surrounding the cash register, where Rose was pouring their drinks while her ranger friend chatted about nothing in particular.
"I beg your pardon, sir." Glen said, "You mind if I ask you a question? See, me and my friends were thinking about doing a little hiking, and a friend who was up here a while back told me he ran into these weird splotches of black tar in the woods that-"
Rose let out a shriek, dropping the glass of soda she'd been holding to the floor.
"Rose?" The ranger said, "Rose, what's wrong?"
"It's inside me!" She shrieked, "It's in my head! I can feel it in my head!"
The Ranger grabbed Rose and tried to hold her still as she thrashed about. "Al!" He shouted, "Need a little help here! Rose is having another fit!"
The cook hurried over to help, only to get a high-heeled foot squarely in his most sensitive spot. Glen hurried to help. Quickly dodging a kick, the Dreamer knelt beside the thrashing waitress and put her hands on either side of Rose's face.
"Look at me." Glen commanded, "Look in my eyes."
"The darkness … the darkness …"
"Look at me!"
Rose's eyes met Glen's. Light poured from Glen as she let a small part of her true self be revealed. The natural luminescance flowed into Rose, making her go rigid once again before finally passing out.
Glen closed her eyes, forcing her true self back as the Ranger demanded, "What was that? What did you do to her?"
"You said another fit. She's had these before?"
"What? Yeah, ever since she found that damn book."
"This book?" The voice was Claudia's. Glen opened her eyes to see Claudia holding up a picture of Departure.
The Ranger nodded. "Yeah. I was here when she found it; she was sure it was written by Alan Wake. I organized a quick search of the town, but never found him. When I came back, she was already reading it."
Glen nodded. "And the fits came after, right?"
"Yeah. It was small at first; she'd go still for a few moments like she lost her train of thought or something. Then, once she finished, the convulsions started. She'd scream for hours until the book went missing. The fits improved after that; this was the worst one in a while."
"Hopefully it'll be the last. Just in case …" Glen pulled one of the lumite medallions she'd made and slipped around Rose's neck. "This might help out."
As if to make Glen's point, Rose stirred slightly. "Rusty?"
"I'm here, Rose." Said ranger Rusty. "You're gonna be okay."
He helped her to her feet, still seeming a bit shaken. "I'm sorry … I don't know what came over me."
"Not a problem." Glen said. "Just glad you're feeling better. Mister Rusty, was it? Maybe you should see her home."
"Yeah." Wheezed Al the cook. "I'll finish up these last folks and close up for the day."'
"T-thank you." Rose said, leaning heavily on Rusty as he guided her out of the diner.
"I can assist!" Papyrus said, standing up so abruptly that he nearly knocked the table over. "I happen to be an excellent chef."
The chef nodded gratefully and accepted Papyrus's help getting back to the kitchen.
"Well," Sans said as the group returned to their seat. "That was interesting."
"Ichor possession." Glen said. "At least the remnants of it. I've only seen in once; a lizard resurrected into a temmie. Nasty business, though it's the soul-less part that kept us from fully healing the poor kid. Rose should be fine. This does mean we've got an ichor infestation on our hands, though."
Sans shook his head. "Could be worse. Could be a big nasty monstar. Get it? Mons-tar?"
"Sans!" Papyrus shrieked from across the diner as the warehouse agents chuckled.
