It took a while to tell everything, mostly because Glen took Artie's request fairly seriously. Even Sans was surprised when Glen went into detail about Jake's brother/owner Finn Cresste and the trouble with the Reapers and the mysterious Illusive Man. It was certainly enough to give Sans something to think about; somewhere, in Glen's home reality, another ragtag group was working to stop a madman in the body of an ancient killing machine modified to eat entire planets, people and all. It certainly made the death of his Underground seem a little paler in comparison.
Then came the confusing tale of Glen and Sans thus far, starting with the city of Ebott in J-27, moving to Sans's home dimension and splitting up after their first encounter with Error in mid-shortcut. Glen told them about Underswap universe, after which Sans and Fuku told of their own adventures in the Underfell universe, ending finally with UNDR-Ground and the fight with Error that once again ended with them in yet another universe.
Silence filled the office for a full minute as Artie seemed to process everything. The woman named Claudia was busily typing at the office's main computer the whole time, and Papyrus's expression made it clear he'd lost comprehension of the situation about the point Error entered the story. He and the human Claudia called, "Jinxie' left to deal with some kind of anomalous slinky they'd picked up.
Eventually Artie turned to Claudia and asked, "Anything?"
"No trace of disturbances in the Warehouse, other than Mel Blanc's Anvil." Claudia said.
"Yeah, sorry about that." Sans said, rubbing the back of his skull.
"Don't sweat it." Claudia said, "That hunk of scrap's been a pain ever since we found it."
"Claudia." Artie said in a warning tone.
"What?" Claudia said, "Or he might figure out about the warehouse? I think that ship's sailed, Artie."
Artie sighed and rubbed his eyes. "All right. Say I believe you. If you can just shift dimensions, why don't you just shift away again?"
"Because I lost the imprint." Glen said. "Error knocked it out of my hands while we were struggling. Without it, there's no way to direct the dimensional gate."
Glancing at Sans and Fuku, Glen said, "Quite frankly, all the Warehouse has done is sit us down and keep us from moving. Given we could easily shift into another Underfell universe, or maybe somewhere even worse, I think I'll just wait until I can convince you to help us."
"Help you?" Artie repeated. "Help you with what?"
The heavy door opened, this time revealing a worried-looking cat woman with long, curly hair.
"Leena?" Artie said, addressing the newcomer. "Maybe now isn't the best-"
"You know about the darkness?" Leena asked, her eyes moving from Sans to Fuku.
"The darkness?" Sans repeated before realizing what she meant. "The ichor?"
"That stuff you found in the other dimensions?" Claudia asked. "You mean it's here too?"
"I'm guessing yes." Glen said. "How much?"
"I-I don't know." Leena said, "But it's strong. I didn't even come into direct contact with it, and it still nearly took me."
"What?" Artie said, standing up. "When?"
"Leena, why didn't you tell us about this?" Claudia asked.
"Because I thought it was just another artifact." Leena told them. "When I escaped, I just wanted to get away from it."
"It?" Glen said. "What exactly are we talking about here?"
Leena rubbed her elbows, a disconcerted look on her face. "It's an artifact … a novel. It was found in a small town in Washington. When I brought it here, I tried to get a feel for it so I could store it in the proper place, but when I started to read it … it …"
After a few moments of silence, Glen finished, "You realized it was reading you."
Leena nodded silently.
"I didn't have much to work with." Glen said, more to herself than anyone else. "It was too dangerous. Sans, Fuku, you saw it for yourself. Even with what little I had, I could tell that the stuff gets smarter the more of it there is."
"That goes with what we saw in Underfell." Sans said, Fuku nodding in agreement. "So how much ichor are we talkin' about here?"
"I don't know." Leena said. "The book was just a conduit, but … I saw a small cottage in a caldera and a man … I think he was the author … Alan Wake."
"Was he corrupted?" Glen asked. "I haven't seen its effects on humans yet, but it sure as hell has an affect on monsters."
"I … I don't know." Leena said, twisting her hands uncomfortably. "I only got a hazy glimpse. Maybe?"
Glen seemed to do some quick thinking before she finally nodded. "Okay. The book was found in Washington, right?"
"In the Oh Deer Diner."
Sans let out a snort of laughter, only to get looks of rebuke from Fuku and Glen. He couldn't help but notice Claudia hiding a grin.
"Sorry." Sans said. "But seriously, if this ichor stuff's here, it's bad news. Underfell … the Underfell Universe Fuku's from, it's drowning in the stuff. I'm guessing here, but I think it's the kind of problem that gets bigger the longer you try to avoid it."
"I'd like to check it out." Glen said, looking to Artie.
"What?' Artie said. "No, no no no, I can't just release you."
"Why not?" Glen said. "I'm a warehouse agent."
"Yes." He said, sarcasm dripping from his voice, "A freelance warehouse agent."
"So consider this a freebee." Sighing, Glen said, "Tell you what; look into this town where the book was found … what was it?"
"Bright Falls." Leena said.
"Right." Glen said with a nod. "If this book was a conduit to something bigger, there's gotta be signs of something else at work there."
Tapping keys soon filled the air, to the apparent surprise of Artie. He turned to find Claudia already bringing up information on the computer.
"Holy Jackpot, Batman." She said, eyes widening as more information displayed on her screen.
Artie adjusted his glasses and read aloud, "Artist goes mad … video game designer goes postal ... journalist murders social worker … how many of these are there?"
"Thirty-seven, going back to seventies." Claudia said, bringing up an article with a picture of two old men wearing clothes more befitting a heavy metal group. "Check it; Thor and Odin Anderson of the band 'The Old Gods of Asgard'."
"Rock on." Fuku said, drawing a curious look from Sans that made her blush.
"They claimed their inspiration came from their homeade moonshine, made from the cool waters of a local lake. Odin's quoted as saying, "It made the shadows come alive."
Artie nodded. "Right. Okay, I'll admit it; this is definitely suspicious."
"Suspicious?" Glen said indignantly. "This is a flashing neon sign screaming 'something funny's going on here'."
"Maybe." Artie said, eyes on the screen. Shaking his head, he said, "Can I trust you to not go running off?"
"Of course." Glen said, nodding at Sans, Fuku, and Papyrus.
Artie didn't respond, his eyes on Leena. She looked into Glen's eyes before moving on to Fuku and Papyrus."
"Hello, pretty human." Papyrus said as Leena looked at him. She smiled a little at that before moving on to Sans.
There was a definite look of familiarity in her eyes, if just for a second. Sans found himself wondering what his counterpart in that dimension was like. Obviously he was an agent; Artie had said as much earlier. Still, given the variation he'd seen thus far (which, he supposed, must include Error), Agent Sans could be anything.
"We can trust them." Leena said.
Artie nodded. "All right. Give me the rest of the night to do some more research; I'd like to hear back from Pete and Myka before I make any decisions."
The fields around the chairs vanished. Glen let out a sigh of relief as she stood up. "Any chance I can get Headache back?"
"Headache?" Artie asked.
"My arm-machine thingies."
"Oh, those." He said with a chuckle. "Well, I guess since you asked nicely … NO!"
"Yeesh." Glen muttered as Leena led them away. "I was just asking."
They stayed that night in the Leena's Bed and Breakfast, a comfortable home that was home to all Warehouse agents according to Glen. Leena, UNDRPapyrus and Agent Papyrus collaborated to a big, if a bit strange, meal that left everyone full and sleepy.
Not sleepy enough, however, to prevent Sans and Fuku from visiting Glen. The Dreamer was sitting on her four poster bed when they arrived, reading a worn paperback.
"There you are." She said, tossing the book aside. "I've been waiting. Papyrus not with you?"
"Nah, he's still downstairs trading recipes with Agent Papyrus." Fuku said.
Sans nodded. "It's nice he doesn't seem too put out by all this."
"Well, he's Papyrus." Glen said with a shrug. "So, I'm guessing you want to talk."
"Yeah, a bit." Sans said, pulling out the room's lone chair for Fuku before sitting down and resting his back against her legs. "First off, what happened to the crystal with the imprint?"
"Like I said, knocked from my hand during transit. Error didn't like being dragged along, and put up a hell of a fight." Glen said. "That's just one of the reasons I'm hoping we can get some Warehouse assistance here."
"Yeah, about this Warehouse," Sans said, "What is this place all about?"
"Long story short, they collect anomalous things. Objects that do strange, weird, and even dangerous things." Glen said. "In this dimension, they seem to be affliated with the Underground somehow. Even in my home reality, they're a top secret … I mean, really secret, not like the whole FBI, Area Fifty-One crap. I bumped into them by complete accident there, though things were different."
"Different how?" Fuku asked.
"Different agents, different caretaker. The caretaker of the time told me about the agents of her time, though, and I think these are them."
"This caretaker being Claudia?"
Glen chuckled and shook her head. "It feels strange calling her that. Took me two years to even find out her first name was Claudia. Even weirder to see her so … informal."
Shaking her head, Glen said, "But we need their help. We've got the trouble with the ichor, we need to find Jake, we need to find the Inverse Harmonius shard so I can get back to J-27 and You, Fuku, and Pap can get back to the UNDR-Ground, and I still need to find a way to fix J-27's Flowey."
"I got some info on that." Sans said, nodding at the surprised look that appeared on Glen's face a moment later. "The Underfell Flowey turned back into Asriel after he absorbed Asgore's soul."
"He absorbed … of course!" Glen said, punching her fist into her cupped hand. "Flowey still has his flux resonance; if filled with enough properly aligned stream energy, his form should stabilize to what it was."
"So you need a soul." Sans said. "Sounds so simple, doesn't it?"
"It is simple." Glen said with a shrug. "There are a lot of bad people out there. Oh, don't look at me like that; I'm not gonna go kill someone; still, if I happen to be around when they meet their end with a soulstone in hand, well …"
"That might not work." Fuku said. Blushing slightly under Glen and Sans's curious looks, she said, "Stream resonance can be very fickle, especially in restorative magics. Asriel's a monster; you'll probably need a monster soul in the very least. You might even need a Bossun soul."
"Okay," Glen said, "Then I'll just find an bad Bossun."
Sans and Fuku exchanged glances.
Glen sighed. "Not that easy?"
"Not really." Sans said. "There aren't many bossun left; most died during the war with the humans. Even then, they can live practically forever."
"Practically?"
"Their aging is tied to that of their children. Kid grows up, parents grow old."
This news seemed to surprise Glen. "Then … if I bring Asriel back …"
"Toriel and Asgore will probably start aging." Fuku continued.
The room fell silent after this somber news. Glen ran a hand through her hair before falling back on the bed. "Man … is it like this for all monsters?"
"The aging thing? Not usually. As for children, I guess it depends on the monster." Glancing up at Fuku, Sans asked, "Say, how'd it work for your parents? I'm asking for a friend."
"Hmm." Fuku said, leaning down to kiss Sans on the forehead. "A friend huh?"
"I bet it was hot."
"Sans!"
"They were caught in a burning passion, engulfed by the flames of romance."
"You better watch it, or I'll burn you, fluffy-bones." Fuku said, her hands slipping over his chest to tickle his ribs
Glen chuckled as the ensuing play-fight between Fuku and Sans which ended with Fuku pinning Sans to the ground.
"Queen Fuku is once again victorious!" She said, raising her hands.
"Long live the queen." Glen said with a grin, only to let out a huge yawn.
"Damn." She said, covering her mouth. "Guess I'm more tired than I thought. Let's talk about this tomorrow."
"Sure thing." Fuku said, rising to her feet and helping Sans to his. She left the room the normal way, but not before Sans got a pinch in.
"There will be vengeance." She said, pointing a finger at him and trying not to smile as she backed out of the door. "Expect it most when you expect it least."
Chuckling, Sans said, "G'night, Fuku."
He started to follow her, but stopped when Glen said, "I'm sorry … about bringing you all here."
"Hey." He said with a shrug. "It's okay; I know you'll get us back."
"I just … I could tell, y'know? You were happy. My path, it's trouble all the way. I just hope it isn't catching."
"Catching?" Sans said with a laugh. "Getting pulled into adventures spanning multiple dimensions is hardly the thing you can avoid with disinfectant spray."
Sighing, Glen said, "I know. It's just … an old friend of mine had a habit of pulling people along with him. I don't want you to feel obligated to follow me."
"Don't worry." Sans said before leaving the room. "Though somethin' tells me at this point that even if we do go our separate ways, we'll just end up bumping into each other later."
