Just as Faith had feared, the conversation about her lost gun didn't go well in the slightest. And inevitably, despite Faith's subtlety of simply asking to borrow one from her dad, her mom still caught on to the fact that she had indeed lost her gun and was in no immediate position of getting it back. To top it all off, Mark wasn't even home yet, as according to Holly he had gone to the hardware store to buy more lightbulbs for his shed in the back yard. Only her mom knew for now, though that wasn't going to last long.
The thought of simply sneaking to their storage room and taking her pick had crossed Faith's mind multiple times, as she still had some bullets at home, but in spite of everything, she decided she still wasn't willing to stoop that low and that getting caught simply wouldn't be worth it. Faith had been expecting this type of reaction from her mom once she learned the truth (or at least the partial truth), though her dad's was likely to be even more dramatic, as it had been his present to her that she'd lost after all.
"Even I'm not exactly sure what happened. It's really hard to explain, okay?"
"I can't believe this. You don't just LOSE a gun. I mean...did you look everywhere in the house? Did you at least mention this to the police, when you made the missing report?" her mom pressed, frantically flailing her arms around as though that would somehow reverse the situation.
Faith shook her head. "No. Like I said, it's not like I could prove that he took it anyway. Not unless they actually found him with it, which I highly doubt will happen between the police not wanting to deal with him anymore and Rowan not being as stupid as I thought he was. And anyway, it wasn't until after I made the report that I realized it was truly gone. I'm really, really sorry about this." At least, that's what I could tell the police if it really comes down to the wire--that I simply didn't know at the time of the report. And hopefully Aaron will be too busy with his other customers to really care that much about this, if he does somehow get news of it.
"Well, you're gonna be even more sorry if Rowan did steal that gun. Do you realize that if he got hold of a weapon like that, he could easily hurt himself or others? With your gun, no less?!"
Faith was painfully aware, though she said nothing, despite the fact there were lots of things she wanted to say right now as she was beginning to lose her patience. Maybe if she was silent, her mom would finally calm down and help her break the news to Mark as gently as possible.
However, her mom shook her head, only continuing. "I have to say, I'm really disappointed. I mean, if you were so convinced all that time that some huge evil organization was after you, you'd think you would at least take better care of your weapons! Mark's gonna be physically sick when he finds out about this, I know that much."
"You don't know ANYTHING!" Faith suddenly roared. And for once, Holly appeared to have nothing to say, only giving her a shocked stare in response to her daughter's sudden outburst. "It's so easy for you and Chance to point fingers and tell me everything I did wrong, but you weren't the ones that willingly gave up six years of your lives for someone that everyone else supposedly turned their backs on, only to have everything and everyone slap you in the face for it! And if you think Dad's going to be upset, I've been feeling physically sick from this entire thing for a long time."
"Wait--you mean you saw Chance again recently? When?" Holly suddenly asked, with everything else Faith had said having apparently gone straight in one ear and out the other.
"No, never mind. None of it even matters, so forget it. Now that I think about it, I don't need a gun. In fact, right now I think I could take on the next person who tries to hurt me with my own bare hands. So thank you, for helping me to see that." I need to get out of here, before I seriously lose it and cause something in this living room to have a similar fate to that vase back at my house. "That's it. I can't stay here anymore. I'm going to go pack."
"Faith, you're really starting to scare me," Holly said, backing away. "I'm just telling you the truth here. Your dad's not going to be happy about this, and I get the nagging feeling there are things you're not telling us about this situation."
"I think I remember now, why I left to begin with," Faith exhaled before she could stop herself, though she somewhat regretted it once it slipped out.
Holly's mouth fell open, and the anger returned to her face. "Excuse me?"
"Mom, I hate to tell you this, but I'm not the Faith you used to know anymore, as much as I'd like to get her back. Pretending around the rest of this family is already going to be hard enough, if or when that whole reunion thing ever even works out."
"Well if you aren't the daughter we know and raised, then who are you?! You're not making any sense at all. And I really don't know what to tell you about the gun yet, except I think Mark would agree with me that you have some serious explaining to do."
"No, seriously, forget about the gun. The company was the main reason I carried it around anyway, which happens to have never existed now. And I have that pepper spray you gave me if I ever need it. Of course I'd still feel a lot safer with an actual gun, but it's honestly not worth any more drama at this rate."
"So..." Holly shook her head with an exasperated shrugging motion. "You're leaving, then? Just like that, without even waiting for your dad to get back or explaining what's going on?"
"Yeah, I am. It's hard enough for me to ask anyone for help, even my own family, but I did that anyway today. But since you apparently have nothing helpful or encouraging to say and it's obvious I've upset you, I think some distance for a while is exactly what we need again. Upsetting you and Dad any further is the last thing I want."
Faith turned around to head back to her room and begin packing up her suitcase, but Holly grabbed her arm to stop her. Her mom now had a pleading look in her eyes, and this was beginning to feel all too familiar from just two nights ago. "Please, Faith... You know I'm not usually one to beg for anything, but right now I'm begging you--don't do this a third time. We already thought we lost you before--twice. Please just stay a bit longer, and let's talk this whole thing out like a family is supposed to do."
"Right," Faith nodded slowly. "So now you want to be civil, after yelling about how much I've disappointed you, how disappointed Dad's going to be and making me even more terrified of everything than I already am?"
"Look, compassion has never really been my strong suit, as you know all too well, but I love you, and this all scares me too. Just wait for Mark to get home so we can all have a heart to heart about whatever's going on here. Please?"
"Mom..." Faith shook her head and sighed, her anger towards her mother slowly beginning to dissipate. "Don't worry," she assured her, despite the fact her answer wasn't going to be what Holly wanted to hear. "This isn't like before, and the reason I want to leave isn't entirely because of our argument. I'll be back again...I promise. We'll get the whole family together, grill some burgers, tell childhood stories, play games, just as it was before Rowan and Spencer showed up. But not yet."
Taking both her daughter's hands and looking her in the eyes, Holly asked, "Then who or what is it this time? First it was Spencer, then it was Rowan. So now that you know Spencer is behind bars and we're all on the same page about that ridiculous 'company' story, who is it this time that's making you believe you can't go to the police if you're in trouble, or to us for that matter? Is it Chance? That old roommate of his, maybe?"
"Actually..." Taking a deep breath and returning her mom's intense gaze, Faith eventually answered, "That person this time is me. I made some bad decisions thinking I was protecting Rowan, and that I could handle the consequences on my own. But once he walked out, the results of those decisions didn't leave along with him. This isn't something that a family bonding session can fix, as nice as this weekend has been, but don't worry--I've been working on a solution that I think has a good chance of working. I can't tell you everything, but I can tell you that I'm not doing to you and Dad what Rowan did to me. Not this time. I'm sorry, but I can't tell you any more than that. Once this is over, you'll be glad I didn't involve you."
Leaving a crestfallen Holly standing alone in the living room, Faith once again (and much more reluctantly this time) headed to her room to pack up her things. Maybe her mom thought she was just being dramatic earlier with her talk of leaving again, but the truth was, she had no way of knowing for sure how willing Aaron was to involve her parents in their little arrangement. She couldn't think of any immediate reasons why he would visit their house, but...she just wasn't willing to risk it. With the right amount of luck, she could stay at her house just long enough to be finished with Aaron, sell as much furniture as she could in the meantime, and maybe then she could think about trying to return to a life of normality.
Once she was fully packed, she began the uncomfortable walk from the end of the hall to the front door, purse and suitcase in hand. And of course, Holly didn't appear to have fully given up on trying to get her to stay. "Why can't you at least wait for your dad? You don't even have to stay here another night--just talk to us honestly."
Faith replied without meeting her eyes, "I can't, because I'm a coward I guess. I know you, and that you're probably going to gush to him all about the gun incident the first chance you get. And well, I guess I'm too much of a weasel to be able to face the disappointment in his eyes. Facing yours was hard enough, and there's only so much of all of this I can face head-on at once. I know we disagree here, but that doesn't change the fact that I love you both. Like I said...I'm not gone for good. I'm not letting that happen."
Holly was quiet for a while longer before eventually breaking her silence. "Just promise me something, Faith."
"Yes?"
"Promise me you'll tell the police about the stolen gun, and anything else they should know about. Even if you can't directly prove it, they can and likely will look into it. You need to stop protecting him, regardless of anything he's told you. Understand?"
"...Okay. I'll do it. Now will you trust me to fix this?" Faith asked, not mentioning that it was herself, not Rowan, that she was trying to protect by laying low in terms of the police.
"I guess I have no choice, do I?"
Faith sighed. "I love you, Mom. And tell Dad I said I love him, too. No matter what happens."
"I will," Holly said, the look of unhappiness remaining on her face as Faith walked out the door and closed it behind her.
The first thing that Faith checked upon returning home was her mail, but before she even opened the door to her mailbox, she spotted about a dozen stickers that someone had apparently put all over the outside of it--stickers shaped like little ice cream cones. I guess it could always be worse, but...seriously?
Just as Faith had begun to peel the stickers off, her elderly neighbor had come out of his house to check his own mailbox next to hers. "It's strange, isn't it? I noticed it yesterday, just on yours," he commented immediately with a look of curiosity. "Did friends of yours do that?"
Immediately changing her glare to a tolerant smile, she greeted her neighbor, "Hi Mr. Morris." Gesturing at the mailbox, she replied, "No. I'm sure it was just some kids messing around, and they decided that my box looked the most fun to decorate."
"Actually, they didn't seem to be kids," her neighbor mused.
Continuing to peel the stickers off, she asked hesitantly, "Then...what did they look like, exactly?"
"Well it was my wife that saw 'em first--you know how she is with those binoculars whenever there's nothing good on TV--and she said they looked like two young women, maybe around your age. One had black hair and one had red hair, but that's all I remember her saying. I went over and asked them who they were and what they were doing, and they seemed nice at face value. Said they were friends of yours playing an inside joke. Or...is that not the case?"
Tracy. And Melanie, maybe? "Well...I guess they're more like acquaintances. I'm sure it was just a harmless prank, and that they won't mind if I give these back the next time I see them," Faith said, holding up the shreds of sticker that she'd just finished peeling off. "They do tend to hate it when they don't get back what's theirs, after all."
Mr. Morris laughed at her quip, and Faith forced a laugh in return so as not to worry him. Placing the sticker shreds down into the pocket of her purse where she normally put her money for Aaron, she returned to her SUV to retrieve her suitcase...and return to an empty house.
There were many things Faith was supposed to be doing instead of sleeping her problems away--unpacking her things, putting some of her furniture up for sale in hopes of paying Aaron back faster, figuring out how to go about her future visit to the police station, et cetera. But all she really had the mental strength for right now was locking herself in her room, gathering the strand of construction chain from her closet to have as a nearby weapon in case someone broke in while she was asleep, and pull her bed covers back before crawling underneath them.
She was safe here, in her own little fort. No one could hurt her, no one could judge her...it was just her and her thoughts, which was okay because she was currently too tired to overthink. As she waited for sleep and maybe even a nice dream to overtake her, she tried to make out the patterns on the inside of her comforter as her eyes slowly adjusted to the dark. For right now, she was safe. Everything was fine...
Yes...everything was just fine in this little fortress, fragile as it may be, because it turned out she wasn't even alone after all like she'd initially thought. The colors of her surroundings carried enough contrast to make her eyes hurt, and the air carried an aroma of candy that had gone stale, but she didn't mind. This was home. This was normality, or at least how Rowan would see it from now on. It wasn't perfect, but it was better than the bleak reality of what was outside.
Faith threw her arms around him now, thinking she had lost him. She wasn't sure what she thought she remembered, and she was afraid that if she let go, he might disappear again. But while he didn't disappear, he also didn't return her embrace, instead squirming away to pick away at the walls she had worked so hard at building around them. It was obvious that he wanted to leave, to see what lay beyond this small fortress.
Quickly, she pulled him away, willing herself to be patient with him. He didn't fully understand what he was doing, after all. What she had never told him was that she too was becoming more curious about the outside, the longer she had spent in this secluded space with him. But these thoughts were foolish and dangerous for either of them to be thinking, of course.
Faith was used to holding him back, but this time Rowan forcibly pushed her off of him, as if determined to break these walls around them. Cracks had begun to form now, and despite her screams for him to stop, Rowan only smiled at her one last time before the structure finally gave way and the walls came crashing down. Cold, salty ocean water filled her lungs as she was swept off her feet by the raging currents.
Despite her kicking and flailing, she couldn't seem to find anything to hold on to or regain her sense of which way was up or down...until she felt something grab hold of her from behind, and it wasn't Rowan. Apparently, the shiny pieces she now saw laying around had attracted one of the many monsters that lived out here in this dangerous place. His smile sported a full set of pearly white shark's teeth, but aside from that, he looked surprisingly human.
Desperately, Faith gestured towards the broken pieces. He could have them all, if he would just spare her. She supposed that all she really wanted at this point was to save herself. If she didn't, she might either die or end up looking just like the monster in front of her. Or maybe that selfishness made her no different from him...
Faith took one last look down at these beautiful but now useless broken pieces which had once formed the structure that had kept her and Rowan safe for so long. Quickly and desperately, Faith flung the shards in the monster's direction until there were none left on the ocean floor, but he still hadn't released her arm.
Suddenly, almost like magic, the water around them was replaced with crisp, fresh air that she hadn't breathed in years, with the ocean that poor Rowan had wanted so badly to explore now ebbing and flowing in front of her and a strange rhythmic thudding sound echoing from an unknown direction. She was cold, terrified, and had no shelter, but...the air felt so much cleaner and clearer. Everything wasn't fine, but yet, it felt so natural and real in comparison to the suffocating fakeness and pretense she'd accustomed herself to in that cramped little shelter.
It was so strange, how the one she loved, or at least thought she loved, nearly caused her to drown while a monster was indirectly the reason she didn't. Faith watched with morbid curiosity as her new 'friend' finally turned his attention to the colorful pieces she had thrown at him before. Eyeing one voraciously, he bit into it the same way that a person would a candy bar. With each one he consumed, Faith hoped more and more that she hadn't made a huge mistake in trusting him, because once he finished, he'd turned his attention back to her. The toothy smile was gone, and while the sight of him intrigued her, she had now seen enough and had no plans of finding out why he was looking at her that way. She bolted across the empty sandy plane and away from the ocean, not caring that the faster and farther she ran, the louder that strange thudding sound became...
Faith abruptly sat up in bed, gasping. To her relief as her gaze darted around her room, she saw that there were no stained glass walls, no candy, and no dangerous oceans. The knocking was the only thing that had carried back over into reality. Well, so much for a nice dream.
Grabbing the chain and gingerly opening her bedroom door, she crept down the hall and towards the front door, making sure this time to look through the peephole first. Turning on the porch light (as by this point it was almost dark out) and taking a look, she saw that it was a rather anxious-looking Sherm.
Faith hastily opened the door, causing him to jump slightly. "Faith! Uh, hey."
"Hey, sorry about that," Faith said sheepishly. "I was asleep and couldn't hear the door at first."
Without missing a beat, Sherm said, "Look, I'm just gonna cut to the chase on why I'm here--I'm worried about you, and I need to know the truth. About Rowan, about Happy Scoops--everything."
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