Shirley:223Please respect copyright.PENANA0ct93rDusa
Remember that diaper girl my age I told you about that is in my dreams? She has been in my dreams several times since. The strange thing is that if Logan or anyone else wore a diaper, I would tease them and think they were big babies and weirdos. However, I like the girl in my dreams. She seems so happy and full of life. I have no clue what her name is. I also know she is just in my dreams, but she feels so real. It is like I always have known her. Sometimes when I am falling asleep, I try to dream about her. I know this sounds very crazy and as if I am losing my mind. Maybe she is my version of an invisible friend.
Doctor Mary:223Please respect copyright.PENANAwmW7nAi1Rg
Shirley visited me today at my office. He started by telling me that he did not have to be here. He mumbled that I should be speaking with Logan or most of the people at his school. Besides this, he said nothing else. This means that it was me that did all the talking. I told Shirley that we had to look at the facts. He was a bully at school and he could not accept Logan or the love his stepfamily was trying to give him. I told him it must be hard and take a lot of energy to be against everyone. There was no reaction from Shirley so I decided to push him a bit. I asked him if it was because he hated others that are different or if did he not understand why they were different. There was still no response. So I finished by telling him that I could see that he was not happy and this led him to lash out at everyone and the whole world. He looked at me with a sullen face. I finished our conversation by telling him that no one can live on an island. He has a lot bottled up in him and he needed to let it out. The things that he had bottled up could be too hard for him to deal with or accept. At some stage, he would need to open his heart to someone. It would set him free. The last thing I asked was if he wanted to be happy.
Shirley:223Please respect copyright.PENANAX6JZZSY08M
I was so mad after seeing the shrink lady. She thought I was crazy and unhappy. She thought that I had bad secrets. I think that she thought that I was a bad person. I went to the bedroom after I told everyone if I wanted to be alone. As I sat in the pink bedroom, I thought of what the doctor said to me. I am happy. I am the way I always was. I know my parents died, but I am moving on. Yes, I feel guilty and think it's my fault but I cannot change what happened. Why does this doctor think that It's me who has the problem? She should come and see how two boys have a girl's bedroom. She should speak with Logan who is trying to convince people that he is a girl. He is the crazy one that is screwed up and immoral. As I looked around the room, all I could see were girl things. I don’t know what came over me. I was not thinking. I found myself smashing the dollhouse, tearing down posters and ripping every dress I could find. Logan came in and started crying while shouting for his mother. My foster mom came in and told me. “There is no excuse for what you have done. This was an act of evil. You should be ashamed of yourself.”
Logan:223Please respect copyright.PENANA1DdgEKtlNI
I cried when Shirley destroyed my things. Mom was mad and told Shirley that he should sleep on the sofa until he could respect me and my family. I forgive Shirley. I am happy that I am now transgender. Everyone except Shirley accepts it. I have found happiness and the damage Shirley done could be replaced. Shirley on the other hand was in a deep hole of misery, hatred and unhappiness. I do not think he likes himself
Teacher:223Please respect copyright.PENANAwUpAp5S2ZE
I have spoken with Doctor Mary. She told me that Shirley can be very judgemental and she knows he is a bully. She thinks that Shirley has some things bottled up that he is too embarrassed to talk about. His actions are a cry for help. This may be the case, however, there is nothing we can do about it. None of the teachers here can get through to Shirley. His grades continue to fall and he has his truancy is a growing problem. When he is at school, he continues to be a bully. The sad thing is that he most likely will be suspended or even expelled from school if this continues. I would love to help Shirley, but the school also has to protect the pupils that are already here.
Logan:223Please respect copyright.PENANA32Hj6fqbsh
Today was a great day for me. There was a sports day at school. Shirley refused to participate, but this is his problem. I decided to participate in the running competition. There was one for girls and one for boys. I was in the girl's race. I loved every minute of it, Running is an exercise of freedom. I feel so free when I run. It was fun to race against other girls. They did not mind that I was transgender. We just had a lot of fun and praised each other, no matter how good or bad we did. I was lucky as I won the race. This means that I will represent our school in the regionals. Mom gave me a huge hug and said that she was proud of me. To be honest, I am also proud of myself. I tried my best and won and now I get to represent our school.
Shirley:223Please respect copyright.PENANANcBwAbMQ4n
What a sham. Logan won a race a few days ago and my foster mom was so proud of him. The only thing she said to me was that it was a shame I did not want to participate. Does she not understand that I did not want to? Why could she not respect this? I just don’t like sports. So now all we hear about is how Logan is so talented and great. I kept my mouth shut for a while. However, when the only thing we talked about was Logan and his victory, I lost my cool and told Logan that he cheated. I explained that if he was in the boy's race, he would not have won. He was allowed to be in the girl's race because he wanted everyone to believe he was a girl and they were too afraid to tell him that he was a boy that dressed like a girl. The fact is that he has a boy body and nothing can change this. It was his boy body that competed in a girl's race which means he had an advantage. In other words, he cheated. The only answer that I got from Logan was that he thought I was very mean and jealous. Not my problem that he cannot see reality and the truth.
Foster Mom:223Please respect copyright.PENANAs2yYxqjAAv
It is hard having a foster child living with us. Having Shirley living with us is a nightmare. I cannot bond with him or make a connection with him. Shirley is a bitter, mad and confused boy and no one knows why he is this way. It is a duty to be with him and I never know when he will hurt someone again. I tried to talk with him about this and reminded him once again that we want to love him and make this a perfect home for him, but he is making this impossible. I told him a family is a place where each member supports each other and wants the best for each other. This meant not terrorising each other and not being mean or jealous. Logan was my child and I realized that Shirley was making his life a hell. I had to protect Logan. I warned Shirley that he had to be a supportive member of this family. There was no reaction from Shirley so I told him it would be bad if he was sent to Genesis Orphanage. I feel bad that I said that. It was a threat and as a responsible adult, I should not be threatening a child.
Shirley:223Please respect copyright.PENANA9pXvk7mDe7
It is so frustrating. Logan is a hero at school and home. Everyone is praising him because he won a stupid race that he should never have been in. Now he will compete in the regionals and represent the school. Everyone is so proud of this. The school will be the laughing stock and known as a school that allows boys just to decide that they are now girls The other schools probably think that if someone said they were a cat, we would all just consider them as a cat. All this praise is too much. I am so tired of it. Do not think that this is because I am jealous. I am not jealous. I had no intention of participating in the sports day because I knew I was no good at it.
Logan:223Please respect copyright.PENANAXeMBskVzP6
Shirley came into my bedroom today and this surprised me. I tried being funny and asked him if was he going to destroy what possessions I had left. As usual, he ignored me and asked me do I still intended to represent the school. I answered that everyone was proud of my victory except him. He thought I should never be allowed to race in the girl's race. I told him he was the only one that thought this. The fact is that no one liked Shirley and everyone liked me. Then I could see that Shirley became red in his face and before I knew it, he attacked me. Punches were flying all over the place. I begged him to stop but he continued. Even when I was crying and on the floor, he just kicked me over and over. The pain was extreme and I was sure that Shirley was trying to kill me. It was only when mom came in the room and pulled Shirley away, that it stopped.
Shirley:223Please respect copyright.PENANAEzUqMWgcrG
I broke Logan's arm when I attacked him. I will be honest, I do not know what happened or why I did it. I just snapped and everything was out of control. I do feel sorry about it and I know it was wrong of me to do. The problem is I don’t know how to apologize or even know if I want to. This also means that Logan cannot participate in the regional competitions.
Foster Mom:223Please respect copyright.PENANAqqDDXT58l4
The attack on Logan was the last straw. I told the social worker that we could no longer have Shirley living with us. Yes, I feel like I failed him. I also feel as if he failed himself. He had a perfect opportunity for happiness. I do not think this has to do with the death of his parents. While it is a contributing factor, there is some darkness in the boy's soul. I can only hope he finds happiness in the future. It just can't be here, as I do not want Logan hurt anymore.
Aunty:223Please respect copyright.PENANAHFJpABqX1u
I am quite apprehensive about participating in this documentary. Everyone will remember me as the evil aunt in the “teenage years of Allie Horten.” I now have found happiness as I am the deputy at the Genesis Orphanage. Everyone here calls me “Aunty” as well. I know that this place has a bad reputation, but we do our best considering it is a very old run-down Victorian building and has a shady past known for its rigid structure and discipline. This is no longer the case. I heard that Shirley will be starting here. I read everything and to be honest, I do not consider him to be a bad child. He is not the son of Satan. Shirley is a damaged child and I will do my best to help him find happiness. I know what you are thinking. You think I will change him to a sissy baby like I did with Allie. This is not my plan or intention. I am a changed woman
Victoria Temple:223Please respect copyright.PENANA33Wp9u3oc9
That concludes the fourth episode of “Orphan Petal” and what a dark start it is. It is so hard to like Shirley. “Orphan Child” has 44 episodes left, so never give up hope. Something tells me that Shirley's journey is just about to start and let's hope he finds happiness. He is now in the claws of Aunty, but there is hope, is there not? After all, Allie ended up being happy. Besides this, I am sure that Aunty does not want to feminize Shirley. She said so herself. Remember to leave your comments on your thoughts.