There was no way that I was going to let my birth mom take me back. She could not take care of herself, and besides that, she did not want Rowan back. What sort of mom only wants one of her children and has no problem splitting brothers up? It showed that she was still incapable of being a mother. I did not know how to respond, so I told her that I was happy and that I did not want to leave Pastor Rivers, as she was a good foster mom, and I loved her. I do not think this made my birth mom very happy, as she called me a spoilt brat and stormed off.69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiv81AnkpM
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There was good news for me. The churches in our diocese decided to have children on the church committee so that it looked like children were being listened to. I was asked to be the child representative at Father James Church. I know that some think that I was asked to do this because he was my uncle. I think he asked me because I had so many ideas, like popcorn during mass and we would sing Taylor Swift songs and not church songs that were 700 years old. It would also be nice if we had burgers during the Eucharist and not the bread pieces the priest gave us that tasted like cardboard. Also, I think the priest should pray for more school holidays. Father James said I did not have to attend the church committee meetings, and he would speak with me occasionally about things. Pastor Rivers was proud of me and told me that I should pray to God to guide me. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO9V9S4FnCg
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Clara was asked to be the child representative at Saint Francis Church. I was hoping that it would be Rowan, as he is very smart, but it seemed that Father Scott liked Clara more. Clara was so proud that she got this position and thought it made her some sort of royalty. She told us that we should call her "excellency," which I refused to do. Clara was still a good friend, despite the fact that I agreed to Pastor Rivers being my foster mom. She heard a lot more now that she was on the Saint Francis committee and told me how rude and arrogant Pastor Rivers was with the school and Father Scott. It made me think that things were worse than they were, as I am sure Father Scott did not tell Clara all the bad details because she was a child. It also made me think that Pastor Rivers was not a saint.69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkCvQDRCk9P
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Rowan got a job delivering newspapers, and this was because he wanted to earn money so he could buy clothes. I was proud of my brother that he had this responsibility, although it meant that he had to wake up so early so he could deliver the newspapers before school and always woke me up when I should be having my beauty sleep. At least Rowan had an excuse if he dozed off during class, while I still had no excuse. There was a side of Rowan that people did not see, and that was generous. He would always give me money or buy me new clothes or something like that. I know he gave other children money when they needed it. I found out that Pastor Rivers also asked him for money when she couldn’t pay for the church rent or her medicine. I can understand why Rowan would help his friends, but I did not understand why Pastor Rivers would ask for money. It's not like Rowan earned a lot of money from delivering newspapers, and he was by no means rich. I think it shows how desperate Pastor Rivers was because her church and medicine cost so much money that she would ask for pennies from a child. Rowan never complained.
Mr. Frank, my choir director, visited me at The Gospel Spirit Church when I was watching Pastor Rivers work. Mr. Frank told me that he had to cancel choir practice for a few weeks as he had just been diagnosed with cancer, and the cancer had spread so much that there was no hope. He wanted to fight it to the end and accept the treatment that the doctors suggested. I admired his bravery, but I do not think that Pastor Rivers did. She told him not to trust the doctors or the treatment and instead use his time for prayer and trust that God would heal him, as God is faithful. Pastor Rivers told Mr. Frank her past medical history and how many times God healed her. This upset me a lot. Was Pastor Rivers telling Mr. Frank not to get medical attention and put all his trust in God? When Pastor Rivers went, I told Mr. Frank that I think that he should trust the doctors as well. This made Mr. Frank smile and tell me that God had given doctors a talent, and this talent was to help sick people. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKEGWxfHRLC
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I was disappointed with Pastor Rivers. I kept on asking myself if I misunderstood her, and maybe it was me that was wrong as I did not have enough faith. Pastor Rivers noticed that I was not smiling as much and wanted to know if I was ok. I did not want to talk about Mr. Frank, so I told Pastor Rivers that Clara told me about the letter that was sent to Father Scott. The letter was harsh, arrogant, and rude. Pastor Rivers just smiled and said that she had forgotten about that letter and wondered why Saint Francis Home was still talking about it. Pastor Rivers thought that the school should get over it; after all, she had forgiven the school. You know sometimes it's hard being a child, as things can get very confusing. Why did Pastor Rivers forgive the school? What did the school do wrong? Should she not be the one who was asking for forgiveness because of the letter she sent? Could she not see what she did was wrong and hurt so many people at the school?69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdi0bcVLJy
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Despite that, I questioned if my faith was strong enough; religion surrounded me all the time. We continued the dance prayers at The Gospel Spirit Church, which ended in a sermon where Pastor Rivers would end up screaming at the top of her voice so that even the church walls trembled. I asked her why she screamed so much as neither Father Scott nor Father James screamed. Their sermons were also much shorter. Pastor Rivers told me that the Holy Spirit takes over when she preached, and maybe Father Scott and Father James should let the Holy Spirit touch them more. Once again, I was confused. Did the Holy Spirit like to talk so much and scream so much? 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUpUYxkLsL
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Pastor Rivers could see that she did not do a lot that Rowan and I liked to do. We were mostly involved in her activities at the church and when she was at markets. Pastor Rivers did come to our choir shows, and that was great because not every parent came. She was very proud of us and thought that we had a lot of talent. But besides attending our choir concerts, that was all she did. Maybe this is why one day she promised Rowan that we would go out rowing on the boat he was repairing. This made me smile as it did show how brave she was, as I would bet all the money in my piggy bank that Rowan did not find all the leaks. Rowan seemed indifferent about her promise and told me that he would believe it when he saw it. It was not the first promise she gave us, and Pastor Rivers did have a talent for forgetting her promises. She promised an apartment where we could live as a family, but nothing was done about this yet. I suppose the Holy Spirit was keeping her too busy. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeUwoFoVNRi
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I may have sounded sad to you or frustrated, but I was not sad. I loved Pastor Rivers, and she was like a mom. Besides that, I got the support that I needed from Father Scott and friends like Flynn and Clara. They wanted to know how Pastor Rivers was treating us and if Rowan and I felt like we were loved. I would be honest and say that Rowan and I were very happy, and Pastor Rivers loved us in her own special way. I do not think that Flynn believed me, as he told me that I could always come to him if I needed a shoulder to cry on. Clara was a bit more blunt and would often ask why Rowan and I were still with Pastor Rivers. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lHCu66iFR
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It was about this time that the choir was about to do a Halloween concert. Pastor Rivers did not like the idea or support that Rowan and I would participate in the show. She thought that Halloween was demonic and Satanic, which promoted evil things. Somehow she even connected Halloween with some religious sects that she said murdered people. Rowan and I did not have a chance to give our opinion. Pastor Rivers started giving us a sermon that she would give in church. When this was done, I did not give her a sermon back but told her that Halloween was fun, and while it did promote scary things, it does not mean that we believe in them or worship the dark side. Rowan and I needed to do the concert as I was the head choir boy. Pastor Rivers allowed us to perform in the show, but she would not be attending. Instead, she would pray for us and the other choir boys. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLdylK94y5t
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Once again, I was confused. Pastor Rivers thought Halloween was satanic, but when Flynn dressed as a demon for Halloween, she thought the outfit was cute. Rowan and I went to prayers at The Gospel Spirit Church before the show, and she was right; she did pray for us and everyone who was being tempted by Halloween activities. Then she started her normal sermon, and please do not ask me what it was about. The only thing that I heard was when she said that we needed to be washed by the blood of Jesus. Once again, my 9-year-old imagination was working over time, and all I could think about was taking a shower with the blood of Jesus flowing over me. It was like some horror film in my mind, and I knew that I would have trouble sleeping for days. So what did I learn from all this? Pastor Rivers did not like Halloween, but she had no problem taking showers in the blood of Jesus. I will never understand adults. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PSBQAQHS0
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Pastor Rivers did laugh a lot, which made me laugh. She was asking a lot when the school would send out report cards. So I did what any smart boy would do. I was wise enough not to show her my report card, so I forged my own report card—a report card that showed that I was a national genius. I have learnt something from all of this, and that was that I should not pursue a career in forgery. Pastor Rivers laughed so hard when she saw the report card and showed it to everyone in the church. Maybe I should not have used crayons, and perhaps I should not have given myself the best grade in behaviour. I also should not have written at the end of the report card that I was a saint and a martyr because of the times that Rowan flicked my nose. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2l7mVPm7bv
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Remember I told you that I was the child representative in Father James Church? I would like to think that he picked me not just because I was cute and his nephew, but because I was a saint and a martyr. Anyhow, Father James told me that he would like Pastor Rivers to preach at his church once a week, as it was important that Christians, regardless of their denomination, worked together. So I got the job of asking Pastor Rivers if she liked the idea. She did as part of her work as a pastor travelling to other churches with her church family. I did tell her that Father James told me that it would be a challenge for her as she would have to have short sermons and not scream. Pastor Rivers agreed to this and was so proud of my work on the church committee at such a young age. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtsKkdagZME
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People say that children like me cannot make a difference in the world. Well, let me tell you that they are wrong. I made a difference at Father James Church. I suggested to him that we should have an ice cream machine in the church so we could eat ice cream during mass. Father James did not agree with this, but he came up with a compromise. The church would build a cafe where there could be church coffee after masses. Father James would put some ice cream in the new cafe for the children. When I told Pastor Rivers that we were building a cafe, she did not seem impressed. She asked me, Did God tell us to do this? Then she explained that when she built a cafe at the Gospel Spirit Church, God told her to do it. I did not really answer except by saying if God does not like the idea, then he can strike the cafe with lightning and destroy it. Deep down, I think Pastor Rivers must have been jealous that her church did not have ice cream. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWpuu0pXEl4
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Father James did not like all my ideas like the time I told him he should say in his sermon that it's a sin for big brothers to flick their little brother's noses.69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzlvrUDnCgR
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We had a huge family at The Gospel Spirit Church, but they did not speak with us a lot. They would be polite and say hello to us, and that's about it. Pastor Rivers invited them to our choir concerts, but they never came. It made me think they lived only for The Gospel Spirit Church and Pastor River's guidance. My niece Pauline, who was a little bit younger than me, did speak with us. Pastor Rivers must have been inspired that I was asked to be on the church committee, as Pauline was appointed “assistant pastor in training." This is a great achievement at such a young age, and Rowan and I were proud of Pauline. At the same time, it was sad as it meant that Pastor Rivers decided on Pauline's future. 69Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXVvktOp3h
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Now Pastor Rivers would be preaching at Father James Church once a week. Father Scott thought this was the craziest idea that Father James had, as he believed that Pastor Rivers would scare the congregation. I was an optimist. Pastor Rivers did promise that her sermons would be short and that she would not scream. What could go wrong?
