Catastrophe struck when Pastor Rivers got another stroke on top of the dozen strokes she had before. So she was in the hospital. Of course, Rowan and I were very worried. I was thinking about the bitterness she had with Father James Church, and she was disappointed with me. Maybe her stroke was the stress that I and others caused her. While Pastor Rivers was in the hospital, Rowan and I were left to fend for ourselves. No one at The Gospel Spirit Church spoke with us, which means they did not care how we were. The only one who spoke with us was Pauline, and that was usually just her moaning about how badly she was treated. This meant that Rowan and I just spent most of our time at the tree house.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1qDlbg3I3
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRkkGSznD4
Pastor Rivers did come back and was grateful that God had healed her. This was even though she now had a low blood count again, organ failures, and many other ailments. She did not even seem happy to see Rowan and me. We didn’t get the hugs that you see in Hollywood films where family members reunited. Pastor Rivers had no time for us. She would tell us that we had to understand that she was very sick and needed to recover, and it could take up to 6 months. So like the time she told me not to speak with her for two weeks, now she was telling us that it could be six months. This was very hard for me as a child to understand. She did not have the energy to even say hello to us but had the energy to decorate the church or be with other family members.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTdVFrf7lOK
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPT4Q6JZ1t
It was summertime, so Rowan suggested that we live in the tree house. This was fun and made us feel like we were lost boys in Neverland. Up to now, Rowan did his best to understand Pastor Rivers and tell me things would get better. Now he was starting even to doubt that. We would talk about that it was days that our mother spoke with us. When she did, she would just talk about her health problems and her trust in God. She never asked us how we felt or what we were doing. It was always about herself. Even when she did speak with her, it was not for long, and she was with us less and less. I was becoming depressed and feeling unwanted, and Rowan was feeling frustrated. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1koOiB77Cx
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkP8bKZ0rWY
We did go to prayers at The Gospel Spirit Church even though only Pauline would say hello to us. At one of these services, Pastor Rivers told people that they should donate money to the church. She explained that the Bible says that believers should contribute to the church, as this was our way of giving back to God and showing how much we believed. Pastor Rivers even said if someone did not have the money, they could ask for a loan, as she would give the person money to pay for the donation. All this left a bad taste in my mouth as I was starting to see The Gospel Spirit Church as a cult and Pastor Rivers as a cult leader. Rowan did not agree with me that it was a cult. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaIcBpmXveH
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5wlqskMtj7
Clara was worried about me. I told her what the situation was, and she told me that it was obvious that Pastor Rivers was still bitter at Father James Church. Clara wanted to know why we did not leave Pastor Rivers and find someone who would love us. My reply was that we could not do that when Pastor Rivers was sick and recovering. Clara shrugged her shoulders and reminded me that Pastor Rivers had time with family members who were loyal to her church and not to her own foster children.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRDBkf7yyta
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeAIOvcaEPi
Father Chris had an idea that he would do a Christian festival where different churches could work together. So one day, while Pastor Rivers was decorating the church, I told her that she was invited. Pastor Rivers said that she would not be attending it as she had to recover. I believed this. However, she added that the church members were still upset with the way that Father James treated her. She suggested that Father James come to a meeting at The Gospel Spirit Church so her members could tell him what they thought about the way she was treated. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvU3tf2sVKC
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6FGMDMPQ1
When I told Father James about this, he agreed at first, but then after a few days, he told me that he would not do it. Father James explained that a priest who would participate in the Christian festival told him that he had an argument with Pastor Rivers, where she told him that Catholics were not Christians. Pastor Rivers would later deny this, and Father James believed her, saying why would she preach at a Catholic church if she thought that Catholics were not Christians, even though at one stage she wanted everything that was Catholic removed at his church. At any rate, Father James said that this meeting she wanted would be like a shooting squad. Her members would not listen to him, and they would just say what she wanted them to say. It turns out that she was right, as Father James wrote a long letter explaining that he was not fired but he wanted the prayers to be done at her church, as well as that she did not follow his church's wishes. Pastor Rivers was very mad at the letter and called it offensive, and she could not take it seriously because he did not use Bible quotations in the letter. Of course, I was now also in her bad books, because when she said she would forgive him, I asked why, as Father James did nothing wrong. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeNbGMPQwPw
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY4ginwIoU3
Flynn could see how depressed and frustrated I was. Flynn told me that if I needed a place to live, I could live in his dog house. This made me laugh so much, and I thought it could be fun. However, Flynn got serious and told us that his mom could adopt Rowan and me. Rowan and I did not give up on Pastor Rivers. This did show Flynn was a good friend and wanted the best for me.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPi2u2mQpqn
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWcwTBO5zqD
Things were going downhill very quickly. Pastor Rivers stopped all contact with Father James and told him that his mission as a priest was not serious. It was just a game for him. Father James just shrugged her shoulder and reminded me that she is not the only one who preaches about God on earth. There are many good men and women that make a difference. Then he thought out loud and said. “Pastor Rivers thinks the Bible is God, while the Bible is more like God's message to us. Maybe Pastor Rivers needs more humility and less pride and judgement.”40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRcVSNHjQF
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoqF7t7yQ0j
Rowan and I told Pastor Rivers that we needed to speak with her. We wanted to discuss how much we missed her and how we felt that she had time for church members but not her own foster children. The discussion did not address this. Pastor Rivers accused Rowan and me of being liars because we said that she was not fired. I hate when people call me a liar. I try never to lie, as it's always hard to remember lies. Anyhow, I went on a rant that she was not fired; Father Chris wanted prayers to be at her church. There are two sides to every story, and it's time we act like Christians forgive each other and move on. We spent two hours talking to her, and she nodded through it. I do not think she has ever seen me so mad. Even Rowan was telling me to remember to breathe. When we tried to talk about family things, Pastor Rivers would just remind us about all the health problems she had. At the end of the two hours, I hoped that we solved things. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3w2YphjIOZ
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcZ8tpNFmuK
It seems like it was just not Father James Church Pastor Rivers had a problem with. When she visited an evangelical church, she got mad that the members there did not call her senior pastor and told her it was biblical and only right to address her by the title she was entitled to. Once again, she used a lot of biblical quotations. The pastor there wrote a letter back to her with Bible quotations that went against this and requested that when she visits his church, she not refer to herself as a pastor as she is not a pastor at his church. Pastor Rivers was not happy. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3AFZ3sk4Ab
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8QFVdSmGd
Neither was Rowan. He was now very frustrated at everything, and this was just not the normal teen frustration. Pastor Rivers no longer spoke with us. We tried talking to her about normal things, and once in a while, she would respond about her health problems and what she was doing at The Gospel Spirit Church. She no longer came to the choir shows. We felt more and more like outsiders.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVclBf5854t
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIvGMfABat3
Rowan and I did try. We still went to her prayer services even though everyone except Pauline ignored us. We even took Flynn to one of them, despite that Pastor Rivers ghosted him long ago. Pastor Rivers was once again speaking in soundbites that no one understood. This time she was speaking about the pain women have when they give birth and if the walls could speak. She managed to compare childbirth to believing in God. Flynn only heard the many times she spoke about talking walls and had an outburst during the sermon, saying, “I hope the walls don’t speak to me." That made Rowan and me laugh so much. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8GFenBMgK
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0hic1YfbXY
I could see that this was not working, and I wondered what went wrong. The only answer I had was that Pastor Rivers was bitter; she could not preach at the Catholic Church. It made me wonder why she would not move it to her church. I could not see a future with Pastor Rivers but did not say anything to Rowan. I did not know that Rowan was thinking the same. We did not tell each other because we did not want to hurt each other.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjxK8Wl0aw
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMoEfvmPY5X
It was strange that when I had these thoughts, Pastor Rivers called us into her office. She just wanted to tell us she would always be our foster mom and that she loved us. She told us that love will prevail. I think she could see there were problems as well and wanted us to forget the problems. The problem was that I no longer believed her, and neither did Rowan. When we left the office, Rowan and I decided that we had enough. We were moving back to Saint Francis home.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYQs9H8iUh
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvxO5O1N9H
We did decide to wait a few days to see if Pastor Rivers would change. This did not happen. She did not notice us and did not even greet us when we greeted her. The only thing that happened was that Pauline visited me and again told me that what we said should not go outside the room we were in. She complained about her mom once again. I did not know what to say, as Pauline never listened to our advice. So I told her Rowan, and I called her mom “giraffe lady” because she was so tall. I was on a roll and asked why her mom always wore short dresses to church and always had shoes that were 2 sizes too small for her. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKECQlWcL7
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqN7NZBoqWG
Anyhow, Rowan and I finally moved back to Saint Francis home. I wrote a letter to Pastor Rivers. Now you know why I called her Pastor Rivers throughout this story. She was no longer our foster mom. I explained to her in the letter that she had ignored us since she had problems with Father James Church. She blamed him, and she blamed me (a child) for what she thought was disrespectful. I wrote that Rowan and I are proud Catholics, and at the same time we did come to The Gospel Spirit Church to show our support and because our family was there. Rowan and I wanted a foster mom, not a preacher, and the fact is she only knew how to be a pastor. All this meant that we were now back at Saint Francis home, as we could not deal with the drama and being ignored. I even found a Bible quote that said it's not enough to say you love a person; you must also show it. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiuG05LjEaK
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2OhlNsDW43
Pauline stopped contacting us, and she ghosted Rowan and me. At first, I thought it was because we left Pastor Rivers. This could be part of the reason, but she also told her mom what I said about her. The giraffe lady told Pauline that she was no longer allowed to speak with us. Maybe that was good, as I was mad for Pauline. I never told her problems to anyone, but she told her mom everything Rowan and I told her. It was pretty much like she was a mole. Pauline seemed to be happiest when her mother or someone else controlled her, and it gave her a chance to be the victim. Some people love being victims.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlwiTxRp93c
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIlvZZSX3a
Pastor Rivers read the letter and wanted to speak with Rowan and me. So we went to The Gospel Spirit Church to speak with her. We thought it would just be Pastor River there, but there were 4 other church members there. Pastor Rivers said she would speak for 6 minutes, and Rowan and I had one minute to speak. She said that she was a pastor first and a foster mom afterwards. She did not even listen to Rowan and me because she started speaking on the phone. So the giraffe lady told us that we have shown disrespect to Pastor Rivers by supporting Father James “firing” her. When I said she was not fired, the Giraffe lady asked, Are we implying that Pastor Rivers is lying? I did not answer that, as even a 9-year-old knows that's a trap. I did say that Father James wanted prayers moved to The Gospel Spirit Church, and Pastor Rivers did not want this. Besides, all this had nothing to do with Pastor Rivers as a foster mom. The Giraffe lady wanted us to apologise, and when we refused. The giraffe lady told us she wanted nothing to do with us anymore and stormed off. So did Rowan and me. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDND2Pe2Mz
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4b9HyMAsch
Rowan and I were upset. We would no longer try. I told him that I had seen videos about cults on YouTube, and The Gospel Spirit Church was a cult. It was all about control, where Pastor Rivers was the queen. The cult members, such as Giraffe Lady and Pauline, could not see or accept that Pastor Rivers had her own faults. They set her on a pedestal and considered her as a direct messenger of God. Rowan and I had no chance with her, as we accepted we were Catholic and proud of it. We did not consider ourselves members of the Gospel Spirit Church cult. Rowan disagreed with me that it was a cult but could see that it was a place where control of others was obvious. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVC6liR47oa
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgki1MhYCr4
A week later, a couple wanted to adopt Rowan and me. We thought it could be a bit early but agreed to meet with them. The couple had a Scottish name that would take me a long time to learn how to spell it. They owned a ranch with horses and chickens and a small zoo! This didn’t matter; when they spoke with us, we were shocked. They listened to us, and the lady even said, “If you get adopted, we only ask for one thing, and that is we communicate and have fun together. If one member of the family has problems or is sad, then everyone has, and a family needs to stick together and support each other." Rowan and I were sold and said we would love to be adopted. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFSoLFpNCBU
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAEW93rWCxg
Our new parents even laugh at Rowan's jokes. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCDGC8uSTQl
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUOdI5K3lC4
Life is a journey. Rowan and I now have contact with our birth mom, who apologised to us. We even have contact with Pastor Rivers. We are so happy with our new mom and dad. They work a lot but always make sure we know they are thinking of us. Rowan and I even love watching them work with horses and chickens, although I refuse to clean up after the animals. The thing I have learnt is that family is not about what you do together but about noticing each other and being there for each other. 40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6co6zJDJn
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIyZ3rUZjHF
When I asked Mom where the storage room was so we could sleep, she was a bit shocked and said that we would each have a room. I put a frog in Rowan's room.40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEwVBvVPyuy
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHy97TNLzp
When Rowan and I were hanging out at a camping ground Mom and Dad made for us and our friends, Rowan smiled at me and said, “You changed since we came here. You are happy again.”40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc7rfcQeLGP
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJELchbE1Ac
Rowan is right. I am happy!
The end
ns 15.158.61.48da2
