I'm a horrible person.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhZzzShGbKj
Anti-hero, my ass. If I was a person reading this, I'd think that anyone who'd support the writer of this diary would be crazy. Despicable.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2kmkrDjrq4
After all, I've ruined many lives. Broken up families. Hurt an unfathomable amount of people. There are even people that have taken their lives as a result of my actions.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxLZKLkIFnq
But I don't feel anything for them.
It was fun at first, you know.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn9ZR74gk1i
It's nerve-wracking. Exhilarating. The echoes of screaming. Distorted faces.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7MIB2j5hb1
Projecting the faces of people I know onto the victims.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxnwiz6XyWS
Seeing people beg for mercy. A power trip, you might call it.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVOKCApytha
Have you ever had someone at your complete mercy? With their body under your foot, telling you to spare them at any cost. They would do anything.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoYMvreZO9i
Feeling your fist connect with someone's gut. A crowd of people watching you, yet powerless to do anything.
It was my life. I would spend most, if not all of my spare time planning how I would be able to rise up the ranks. Get more media on me. My character.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzu393sjYa
I can't help but grin when I overhear people talking about me in person.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡefgWP48U4G
When I read the comments under compilations of my appearances.
But it's tiring.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpqJyR6PK33
The constant hate. The fear of being watched. The fear of being discovered.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡILyjFSoWwA
I don't usually say much, but when we're talking about something I'm passionate about, I won't stop.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ04Hg3iQa6c
Naturally, I'm grateful they put a curse on me so that I don't accidentally blabber confidential information about villains.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVauUQU7KI6
But as heroes and villains are common topics of discussion, it's easy for me to get carried away. And after that happens, the anxiety hits.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTZcuTQNuM9
What if they figured out my identity? What if they realise how despicable I am?252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcX2fXti8m6
I can't talk to them again. It's too dangerous.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9mfopTo61
Call it an irrational fear, but I can't help it.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ76l78hiJ3v
Sometimes I wonder why they picked me when I knew what I was doing was wrong. Well, I guess it's better than those who flaunt their crimes.
And gradually, I numbed myself to humanity.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7bs17s2m9e
Those aren't humans. They're disgusting lumps of meat. They don't have a will of their own. Look, how they're squirming beneath my feet, promising to disown their children in order to stay alive. How one leaps in front of the other to finally die and be remembered as a hero despite living a life that can only be described as trash beforehand.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwigI8qQWBd
If I hated humans before, I came to despise them with all my being.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhUT0Fb5g0t
Hope for humanity? Don't be ridiculous. Heroes don't exist. They're just garbage, like you and me, parading as luxury goods, made to capitalise and give false hope.
I'm tired of all this. Of being reminded of how revolting humans are.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrG3KEzuAE
Of being lonely.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Ti0cs8XLK
Pathetic, right? Even though I think like this, I'm lonely. It's not something I'd like to admit. I'm always alone, so you'd think I'd be accustomed to it. And in most cases, I prefer to be alone. But I can't help but feel lonely sometimes.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXqwVXPbAlE
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So I take comfort in my own world.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy0OuzuvdD5
If the Organisation doesn't want me, then no one would want me.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5f1BNvE7cu
I joined hoping that I'd be of some help to society despite being a loser, only to lose what little faith I had left in the world.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrCHPBfwjJK
Truly, I deserve to be called a villain in all aspects.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgncehnbhO
I hope you're happy. I hope the heroes are happy. I hope the higher-ups are happy.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0L0ldsLql
Or maybe I hope that the world ends tomorrow and we all get what we deserve.
The power of friendship, the happy life that's always being portrayed in mainstream media doesn't exist. It's all lies.
I tried, you know. I tried hard. I had perfect attendance in school. I did well in tests. In sports. But why? Why can't I bring myself to try hard for anything now? All that's left for me is to be the villain. With no one on my side my whole life.
You don't need to pity me. The families I've ruined sure don't.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpeg0FqlDC
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I can't keep doing this forever. I'll have my memories erased, and then what? I'll just keep being unwanted. I'll barely pass my studies. Get a mediocre job that I despise. A quiet life that made no impact. I was raised to be "special", but I'm not even special to one person.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVPWU3hdk4J
Why does a part of me keep screaming to be recognised?252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡetcwvQwaru
If only I could have been more dedicated. If only I could work harder. If only I had a dream.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2bdxisuK17
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What would it be like as a hero? To have people not looking up to me from beneath my feet, but from respect and admiration? To have cheers whenever you walk by instead of when you're defeated and humiliated? But I can't even handle the expectations of my parents, much less the expectations of the whole public.
I can't even be a proper villain. A villain wouldn't have thoughts like these, right? They wouldn't even be writing something like this in the first place.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfUMqgTj1Gu
I can't be a normal human being. I can't be a hero nor a villain.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpkADUVTwMf
I shouldn't even have been born.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMXfTD49unP
The Organisation didn't even need to pick me; surely there are so many people out there who're better at being the villain than me.
Ah, well, whatever. It doesn't matter anyway.252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEjWOlfbYlO
....252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6aH7Kv6JV
[Deleted passage]252Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6mL07j3C1j
