In just that one word, that one simple word, the rest of the room had been reduced to nothing but background noise. The movement, the laughter, the lights…everything else ceased to exist the moment I turned around. I saw her, standing there in the midst of all the chaos. Her lips stretched back into the widest grin the moment she saw me; a genuine grin that reached the light in her eyes.
Emerging behind her was the taller redhead, who came to a halt. The grin on her lips could’ve rivaled Sage’s the moment her eyes landed on Ryan.
Just like that, the two of them were running. I pushed forward, brushing past anyone in my way and knocking shoulders with more people than I could count. But I couldn’t have cared less. The moment we collided had made every second worth it. Every jolt of pain through my ankle, every nasty look…I’d have done it all again.
“Oh, Ro.” Her breath was hot and shaking against my neck and I only tightened my arms around her. The feeling of her heart thudding against mine was a welcomed feeling. Her fingers tangled themselves in my hair, burying her face in my chest. “I’m glad you’re okay.”
I held her a little longer, giving us ample time to revel in this moment. Although eventually, I reluctantly backed up a step. I was still close enough to reach up, cupping her cheek and running a thumb along her jaw.
“Are you-?” I cut myself off, searching her face a moment before holding her at arm’s length, looking her over. The blood had been cleaned up, as had everything else. Dirt and ash had been brushed from her brown hair and the cut on her forehead had been tended to. Her clothes had been changed, leaving her in a clean T-shirt and jeans. “Okay,” I sighed, brushing strands of hair from her face. “You’re okay.”
Sage breathed out a chuckle and pressed her forehead to mine. “Always so protective, Ro.” That smooth voice and airy laugh was the warmest feeling in the room at that moment. Her arms tightened around my waist until the distance between us was swallowed entirely. “I missed you, too.”
I could’ve stayed like that forever, just lost in the tightness of her grip and the warmth of her body against mine. But unfortunately, the moment came to an end all too soon when another voice spoke up. “Alright, kiddo.”
With a weight in my chest at the sound, I pulled away from Sage’s touch. It was Ryan who’d spoken. Mira was cozied up against him, grinning ear to ear and perched contently under his arm. Her cheeks glistened ever so slightly under the bright lights, but her eyes remained locked on her brother.
“Good to see you, Simone,” he greeted my girlfriend with a nod and an honest grin. “Glad to see you’re alright. All of you.” After giving his sister another tight squeeze that she happily leaned into, Ryan gestured towards the door. “Come on, then. Promised Sargent I’d get you taken care of, didn’t I?”
And so with that, I’d taken a hold of Simone’s hand as he led the three of us back out of the restless mess hall and into the quiet corridor beyond the double doors. The moment they swung shut, the subtle hum of the fluorescent lights were the only sound we were left with. That, at least, I could find myself grateful for.
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The walk had taken longer than I’d been hoping it would, though I supposed I was likely the reason. If I wasn’t careful, the pain would flare up again and I’d stagger to a halt against the wall. Simone, for the most part, had managed to keep me upright as well as keeping my attention off the pain. She talked endlessly about everything that had happened since we’d arrived at the bunker.
We’d arrived through a massive ramp, nestled between the rocks of a cliff. According to Simone, I’d dozed off about thirty minutes away from the bunker. Soldiers had greeted us the moment the doors slid shut, unloading us from the vehicles and eventually, to our rooms. Sage, along with Mira, had been able to shower and get cleaned up at the clinic after Sargent had informed them that a doctor had arrived.
“All while I was…what, asleep?” I didn’t recall any of that.
Nonetheless, Sage’s brown eyes flitted to me and her grip on my hand tightened a bit. “Awake,” she corrected me, leaning into my arm a bit. “For some of it, at least.”
“Awake.” Mira barked out a laugh. In front of us, she still had yet to move from under Ryan’s arm. He glanced down at her and she shook her head. “Sure. Definitely not coherent though.”
Right… My mind swam, desperately trying to recall any of the events that Sage had explained. I remembered flashes of light, voices, the sound of the trucks shutting off…hadn’t there been others with us? Just as I’d opened my mouth to ask, Ryan and Mira had silenced their own conversation as they halted before another set of massive doors. The sign above them read clinic in large, glowing letters. There was a flutter in my chest as Ryan pushed open the doors. Maybe, maybe, maybe.
It was a word that played on repeat in my mind as I pictured the scene beyond the doors; a room crowded with civilians. Survivors. They’d take up every spare inch of the room. Every bed would be full while doctors hurried around. My mom would be there, eyes lighting up the moment I’d step through the door. She’d come running over with my sister in her arms and my step-dad in tow. And everything would be perfect again.
Maybe.
My grip on Sage’s hand tightened as Mira filed in behind her brother, and then the two of us.
But it hadn’t been anything like what I’d expected.
It was silent.
Empty.
The room consisted of a small desk and a few rows of cots, only separated by thin curtains. Lining the back wall were cabinets and counters covered with various medical supplies. I hesitated just inside the door. The fluttering in my chest had ceased, only to be immediately replaced with a heavy weight. But eventually, the gentle tugging of my hand had guided me further into the room and the doors slipped quietly shut behind us.
Ryan had finally managed to pull away from Mira long enough to approach the woman seated at the desk. He leaned forward against the surface and they quickly fell into a rather hushed conversation. Clearly put off by her brother’s absence, the redhead dropped back beside the two of us with a quiet huff. Her shoulder brushed against mine as she stood to my left.
“Holding up alright?” She finally asked, green eyes flitting in my direction. The amusement was gone, replaced with a casual sort of concern. I was standing upright, and that seemed to be good enough for her.
Still though, any response died before it reached my lips. Was I alright? I scanned the room once again, taking in the pristine state of the cots and medical supplies that remained untouched. Almost like we were the first ones there. My bones only seemed to ache even more, and the pain in my ankle had become a dull throb in the back of my mind. The short row of chairs lining the wall behind us taunted me, but I shifted my stance against Sage instead.
“Fine,” I finally managed to get out. It tasted like a lie against my tongue, but I ignored it. That was relative now, anyways. With a quiet sigh, Mira’s head came to a rest against mine. At least we were alive. “What about you? Are you…?”
Whatever response Mira had was lost on me as another jolt of pain snaked through my ankle. I drew a sharp hiss, leaning into Sage’s grasp a bit more. The lights were too bright, and only seemed to be growing brighter the longer I stood there. Pinpricks of light danced along the edges of my vision, the blinding glow of a city playing like a dream in the back of my mind.
The feeling of a warm thumb trailing along my knuckles was enough for me to blink myself out of it. The mushroom cloud was gone, though I found myself staring at my girlfriend’s wide eyes. Blood and ash were streaked across her face. Another harsh blink and it was gone. My heart hammered in my chest as her clean face came back into view.
“Ro?”
When her hand lifted to rest against my cheek, I’d have given anything for it to just feel real. Instead, the touch was distant and subdued.I pulled away, backing up a step and colliding with Mira, who grunted. She caught my arm regardless, holding me steady. “Rowan?” Her brows pinched together, grip tightening a bit at my elbow. “Jesus. Why don’t you - here. Just-just sit down.”
There was a scraping sound from behind as Sage dragged the chair forward. But before I could sit, Ryan had spoken up and my attention was shifted back to the two at the desk. “That won’t be necessary.” He was offering a gentle smile as he approached, along with the woman at his side. “Rowan, this is Aina.”
Aina shifted her clipboard under an arm, holding out a tanned hand and offering a grin that was far too cheery. My throat tightened as I looked between her hand and back up to the dark eyes behind her glasses.When I made no move to shake her hand, she lowered it, though the smile remained. “Come on.” Her voice was gentle as she nodded towards the row of cots. “Let’s go get you checked out.”
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“So….Aina.”
We’d remained in relative silence after I’d followed the woman back. The clinic had been larger than I’d initially thought. I’d followed her to the back wall and through a small white door. The room wasn’t big by any means, but it was more private and secluded than the cots had been. That, at least, I had been able to find some solace in.
I sat on a stiff chair with my leg propped up on a metal stool, with Aina crouched on the ground before me. She worked carefully to wrap my swollen ankle, though that didn’t stop the occasional twinge of pain that came with the added pressure around the injury. Still, I cleared my throat and ignored it the best I could. My gaze flitted to her clipboard, catching a glimpse of her name at the top, scrawled in cursive.
“Aina…Kurose, right?” Aina gave me a rather perplexed look over the top of her glasses and I nodded at the paper. The bandage pulled taut once again and I winced. Her gaze returned down to her hands as she worked. “Where you from?”
“Chatan,” she responded. Her tone was short, and offered no elaboration at first. Her movements became slower and more thoughtful and eventually, she spoke again. “But that was a long time ago. My parents and I moved to New York when I was young. We never got the chance to move back.”
“Because of China, right?” A hiss of pain was sucked through my teeth as she finished with the bandage, pulling it a little too tight. Her brows knitted together as her attention returned to me completely. “Because…they annexed Okinawa, right? Military took over there ten years ago…?”
“Okinawa’s military history wasn’t made public,” Aina answered after a few seconds of silence. I shifted, removing my foot from the stool and letting it rest gently against the cold tile floor. Another few moments ticked by before she sighed, pulling the stool back a few inches and taking a seat on it. “But yes. Okinawa was locked down after the annexation. Turned into a massive military base and was renamed Fort Okinawa. Citizens were evacuated from the area, and no one was ever allowed back unless you were drafted.”
“My ah….my step-dad. He was from Okinawa,” I told her. The confusion seemed to ease a bit, though the words only furthered the tightness growing in my chest. I dropped my gaze to my hands, running my thumb along the small scrapes that covered my palm. “Came here for college and never went back.”
“One day when the war is over, I’ll take you and your sister out to Japan. Show you girls around my stomping grounds.”
Of course, the war never got better. But the promise still played in my ears in a way that made my eyes burn. I blinked, rubbing the heel of my hand across my eye before looking away. “Always said he wanted to, though. Don’t think anyone knew how this was gonna turn out.”
When I looked back to the woman across from me, her eyes weren’t on me. They were down at the clipboard that was clutched in her hands. She took a slow breath before finally climbing to her feet and smoothing out her white coat. “It was a pleasure to meet you, Rowan,” she told me. “And you’ll be just fine. Just take it easy on that foot for a while, alright? Come by anytime if you ever need anything.”
I wasn’t surprised with the sudden dismissal. Maybe part of me had been relieved, though. And so with no further comment or argument, I pushed myself up out of the chair and followed her back out to the main room. Sage and Mira were still there, sitting along the front wall by the door. Sage was laying down across the chairs with her head in Mira’s lap.
The moment that pair of green eyes landed on me, she nudged the girl in her lap. Sage sat up, hastily swiping slender fingers beneath her eyes. If she’d been trying to hide the tears, it was a futile attempt. The dampness on her cheeks still glistened under the lights. Still though, my girlfriend offered a wide grin as she climbed to her feet. She was across the room in moments, arms thrown around my neck and her lips pressing a kiss to my cheek. I hadn’t realized just how much I’d missed her warmth in those short few minutes apart, and I relaxed in her arms with a sigh.
“I’m alright, Sage,” I assured her as she backed up a step. Regardless, dark eyes flitted me over as a thumb ran across my knuckles.
My gaze landed on Mira, who was now approaching to stand by Sage’s side. She came to a halt beside her, close enough for their arms to touch and Sage looked in her direction. There was a subtle look of…something, but it was gone as quick as it had come. The smile faltered a bit before she forced it back on her lips, facing me again.
“Come on.” Sage’s voice was gentle as she cupped another hand over mine, guiding me back towards the doors. “We can show you where the showers are and you can get yourself cleaned up there.”
Mira fell into step beside me, no matter how slow my strides were. Neither of them seemed to mind. Instead, she reached out and ran a hand over the top of my hair. Pale flakes of ash floated to the ground, and I batted her hand away. “Yeah. She needs a shower,” she teased.
I batted her hand away, ignoring the returning tightness in my chest. I didn’t bother to respond. The clearly offended grunt from her direction was enough incentive for me to keep my mouth shut. Of all things and she’s making a joke out of this? I spared another look over at her, but her attention was no longer on me. Her eyes scanned the small groups of people that we’d pass on occasion. They were wide and alert. Hoping. I rolled my lips in, turning my attention back to the hallway we walked down. In my hand, Sage’s grip tightened.
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The walk to the showers was long and painstaking, though I figure if every step hadn’t been a chore, we could’ve gotten there far sooner. But neither of them seemed to complain at any point. Not even Mira, who’d taken it upon herself to give me the grand tour of the place. It wasn’t much different than it had been on my first journey through the maze of halls; just as long and seemingly endless as before. But the more we walked, the more there were some things standing out.
Mira had taken us the longer way around, leading us past several new rooms that I’d yet to see. She showed us a set of doors down one of the many long corridors; a small and somewhat secluded daycare and classroom. Toys were scattered across the floor and faded posters clung to the pale walls. Children were either playing or screaming, clinging to their parents who looked too exhausted to even be there.
Down that same hall was the gym, which was just a little bigger than the daycare, though no less cramped looking. The massive machines took up most of the space, while the few groups of people inside took up the rest. None of them seemed to be working out as much as talking amongst themselves. In the furthest corner, a brunette woman stood in full uniform, leaned against the wall. She seemed to be carrying on a rather heated discussion with someone out of sight.The punching bag was thrown forward with an abrupt punch and I flinched, continuing down the hall with the other two.
All the while, Mira carried on about what she’d learned so far about the bunker. She’d prided herself on the smallest details that Ryan had let her in on, whether or not she was technically supposed to know. She told us about a growing room on a lower level for various fruits and vegetables and how they’d been raising chickens down there somewhere as well. She continued on about the laundry rooms and storage facilities on that second level, and how they’d be open to volunteer work to pass the time. Though I admit, by the time we turned back down a familiar hallway, everything she’d been saying had started to blur together.
My aching limbs trembled and there was a heaviness in my skull I could hardly comprehend. That was until we finally came to a halt at the beginning of the hallway. The hanging sign from the ceiling read Residents 50-70.
“-came from?” Mira’s voice jolted me back to reality and I blinked, looking between the two. Sage leaned herself against me, her hand running small circles over my back.
“What?”
The two shared a brief look before Mira sighed. “You remember what room you came from? The number?”
My teeth sank into my bottom lip as I glanced over my shoulder, back down the row of rooms. “Sixty…” I scanned over the numbers above the rooms. A hazy number surfaced in the back of my mind, painted in white. “Ah…sixty-two?” It had only been an hour ago, hadn’t it?
But Mira didn’t bother to second guess me. Instead, she merely crossed to a set of doors along the opposite wall. The sign above flickered lazily. Facilities. She came to a stop, turning around in place and nodding over her shoulder. The look on her face was a little softer now as Sage and I approached.
“Go on and get yourself cleaned up.” She reached out, offering a gentle squeeze to my shoulder. “There’s towels in there. Just look for the shower labeled sixty-two. We’ll be waiting right here when you’re done.”
My gaze shifted back up to the sign and then down to the doors. My ankle ached and my body felt sticky with the blood still crusted to it. “If you need help, I could-”
“I’ll be fine.” I cut Sage off, though once I saw the look falling from her face, I offered her hand a gentle squeeze. “Not the first time I’ve showered with a busted something.” The smile I’d tried to offer her was futile, so I pressed a quick kiss to her forehead to appease her. It seemed to do little to quell her concerns, but she let go of my hands nonetheless.
With nothing more to say, I parted ways with the two. The moment the doors slipped shut behind me, I let out a long breath. Much like the rest of the bunker, the bathrooms were rather spacious and sterile; pale walls and flickering fluorescent lights. On the left were a row of curtained off stalls with numbers above them. 50-60. Drawing a slow and careful breath, I made my way down the line and slipped past the curtain. Despite the close quarters, it was nice enough to have the shower to myself.
Once I’d pulled the curtain closed behind me, I stripped myself of my old tattered clothes. They dropped to the floor in a bloodied and singed heap. The sight alone was enough to bring back the nausea from earlier, and I pushed the sight to the back of my mind as I climbed into the shower and twisted it on. Cold water pelted my skin, immediately washing off the blood that had spent the past several hours clinging to me. I stared down at my feet, watching as the pink water collected around the drain and stained the tiles.
I ran a hand through my hair, wetting it down and freeing it of the reminders of the City. The City. Cold and wet waves fell against my back, so distantly that I hardly registered it. Blood was still crusted around the wound on my arm from the bathroom, and I ran a thumb along the sticky red. It came off with ease, revealing the spray of freckles beneath.
Yes somehow, they seemed so foreign now.
I hadn’t even realized how badly my hands had been shaking until I held it out before me, rubbing my thumb and forefinger together to wash away the blood. Just the cold, I told myself, even though the burning in my chest and lungs told me another story. Just the cold, I tried again, staggering back to lean my weight against the tile wall.
The water was coming out, hot now.
Just the cold.
Steam filled the stall, enough so that sweat began to prickle at my neck.
There was a flash somewhere before my eyes, and that blistering heat of the inferno was back. The hot wind was licking at my face. The screaming; there hadn’t been screaming, had there? The smoke. I couldn’t tell anymore if that was steam or smoke in my lungs; I couldn’t breathe either way.
“Ro?” A muffled voice came from beyond the stall and it met my ears as an almost distorted taunt. A shadow fell across the curtain from outside, and I sucked in a strained breath. “I know you said you were fine but…I brought some clean clothes.”
Clean. My eye betrayed me, sparing a glance at the pile on the floor. The thought of even having to put those back on again made me sick. Standing there wasn’t making me feel much better, either. I reached out, slamming my hand against the top of the lever and knocking the water off. The stream died almost instantly, allowing the cold air to seep back in.
“I’ll just leave them-”
“Wait.” I stumbled forward, holding myself upright with my hand against the tile.
My heart still hammered painfully in my chest, and I took another breath. The steam was hardly distinguishable from the smoke and I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. My hand was fuzzy before me when I finally opened my eyes again, but the stench of smoke was gone. Slowly, I took another step until I was close enough to the curtain to pull it back a bit.
Sage stood there, clothes clutched tightly in her hands and brows knit together. Brown eyes dropped to the clothes in hand for a moment before she held them out to me, offering up a small smile. “Here. Ryan’s back. Says he’s got someone he wants us to meet. But…” Her gaze flitted over my face as I reached around the curtain and accepted the clothes from her. “Ro, we should just get you back to your room. We can always meet them later.”
The curtain slid back into place as I released it. Much like what Sage and Mira had changed into, I’d been handed a plain T-shirt and jeans. But the fabric felt soft against my skin, and fresh. I didn’t waste anymore time before slipping into the new set of clothes. The scent of laundry detergent was enough to chase away the lingering stench of smoke that had been taunting me. Even the shower hadn’t been enough to chase it away, entirely.
I tugged on the jeans and buttoned them before leaning myself back against the metal wall of the stall with a shaking sigh. Sweat still clung to my neck, while my heart still pounded away and my hands continued their trembling. Just from the shower, I told myself.
“Rowan?” After one final steadying breath, I gathered my old clothes from the floor and pushed back the curtain again. Sage staggered back, eyes widening a bit. “We don’t have to-”
“Come on.” I offered her another smile, one that I was positive she wasn’t falling for. Her eyes narrowed a bit as I held a hand out to her, though she took it regardless. “Let’s just meet up with Mira and Ryan."
I offered her hand a gentle squeeze, drinking in how much cooler her skin was compared to mine, now. A very welcomed feeling, it was. That small gesture seemed to ease something in her, and she sighed. "Yeah, alright," she relented. That same beautiful smile was back on her lips, no matter how forced. "They're out in the hall waiting for us. Ryan says we're gonna just love her."
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