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Hallway after hallway and staircase after staircase, all of which only serving to take me further away from Sage. With one soldier in front and the other behind, that only made the tightness in my chest worse. Commander Sergeant. In a different world, there were so many different directions this could take; anywhere from a slap on the wrist to imprisonment. But unfortunately, there was only this world.
Only this world and I feared there might be more options at their disposal.
Surely it wasn’t that big of a deal, right? It wasn’t something worthy of chains or bars or worse. Was it? But a harsh nudge from behind sent me staggering forward and the soldier walking before me shot a look over his shoulder. Maybe disinterest. Maybe annoyance. Either way, his eyes never landed on me; not really. They flitted from me to the soldier behind, then back to the hallway before us.
Time crawled on and on with every long hallway and staircase we took. It felt like an endless descent to Hell and yet, the eventual sight of the destination in question did nothing to slow the racing of my heart. The soldier leading us had come to a halt before the door. Much like the one that had led to the offices, this one was controlled by a keypad. Once the pin was typed in, a loud buzz broke the silence and the door was unbolted.
Thoughts whirled through my mind, though not a single one stuck. None of them made any real sense, though each new one was just as fleeting as the last. And as the soldier pushed open the door and I was nudged through from behind, the weight in my chest had sunk to my stomach.
Where the color palette hadn’t changed from the rest of the bunker, the room offered something that I hadn’t seen elsewhere; a jail cell nestled in the corner of the room. It was small; hardly much bigger than the cot that was inside it. And much to my dismay, I was soon to discover that it wouldn’t just be the cot trapped behind those bars.
We’d barely stepped through the doorway before the soldier from behind steered me into the cell, sliding the door shut with a loud clang that rattled against the rest of the bars. There was a low buzz as the cell locked itself up tight.
Imprisonment. Better than any alternative, right?
And yet I found myself whirling around against the steel bars, gripping them until my fingers ached. I needed something from them; anything. Not even reassurance, just something. But they’d backed away, standing against the wall across from me and whispering something amongst themselves. The one who’d been in the lead spoke into his radio, his eyes barely flitting over me. “The source of the lockdown is in custody, sir.”
He spoke the word source as a breath of disbelief; one I found myself feeling as well. The source? My throat tightened as the aching in my fingers grew worse. My palms itched against the metal, but I couldn’t move. Didn’t know if I couldn’t or wouldn’t, but my lips were moving before I could stop myself.
“What source?” I managed to get out. My voice sounded so painfully loud over the humming of the lights, and I felt my heart skip under the weight of their stares. “You don’t really think that I-”
“We don’t think anything,” sneered the soldier who’d followed behind us. I loosened my grip on the bars as he sauntered forward, and I took a step back. “Our orders were to bring in anyone who didn’t comply with the lockdown. You were the only one not within their designated room at the time of the security sweep.”
He came to a halt just beyond the bars, dark eyes looking me over but not actually seeing me. I took another step back, my gaze flitting to the soldier who still remained against the wall. He wasn’t looking at either of us. The best and only way to describe the look on his face was impassive at best, and that hadn’t helped ease the concern growing in my chest.
I shifted further back, feeling more and more like a piece of unwanted meat the longer the soldier stood there. His lips had only just begun to part when the door let out a low buzz, and the two men straightened up. The heavy door was pushed open with a groan and two more soldiers immediately filed in. One of which I recognized; a tall brunette with her brown eyes widening slightly the moment they landed on me. Her lips pressed into a thin line as she took her position against the wall, alongside the other three.
“Well, well.” The cool voice sent a cold wave down my spine and my attention snapped back to the doorway. A towering woman stood there, dressed in a heavily decorated uniform and thick blonde hair that was pulled back into a tight bun. That chilling gaze roamed over me as she stepped into the room.
“Commander Sergeant Blackthorn,” one of the soldiers greeted in a stiff voice. I didn’t look to see which one. His voice sounded so far away to my ears anyways, and those hostile eyes weren’t making it any easier to focus. They watched me with such an intense boredom that I feared any wrong move would set the woman off. “The source.”
“At ease, soldiers.” At the command, I finally jolted my attention to the other four soldiers. All of which, including Lydia, were lined up against the wall. Not one of them, of course, looked any more relaxed than they had been. I tried desperately to catch Lydia’s gaze, get something out of her, but her eyes weren’t on me. Like she didn’t want them to be. But then the Commander Sergeant took a slow and taunting step forward. The clicking of her boots against the floor was the only sound. “You’re dismissed.”
“Sir-”
“I’d implore you to do as you’re told, Private Holt,” the woman spoke in that same biting tone.
“Yes, Commander Sergeant.” With their final salutes, the four of them retreated out into the hall. The heavy door fell shut in their wake, leaving the two of us alone.
Silence slowly filled the air in those moments, and my breathing sounded too loud in my ears. I tugged my letterman jacket tighter against myself as I backed up against the cold wall behind me. And yet, the woman regarded me as nothing more than a mild inconvenience. A subtle frown rested on her lips with her arms folded over her chest.
“Miss…Vanderwaal, is it? Rowan Vanderwaal?” The Commander Sergeant looked me over once again, taking a slow and painstakingly casual step forward. “One of, what was it, five survivors of the bombing of New York City? Or so you say. Word through the grapevine is that you’re quite famous for that lie, Miss Vanderwaal.”
‘Y’know they’re liars, don’t you?’
‘I wouldn’t believe ‘em if I were you.’
The cold that bled through the back of my jacket was forgotten. Now, there was only a prickling under my skin as I pushed off the wall. “With all due respect, ma’am,” I hissed at her, “you’ve heard wrong. Wherever you’ve been getting your information from, I’d suggest you find a more reliable source.”
“Please.” The woman was quick to dismiss my words with a wave of her hand. It was such a careless delicacy, only made even more so as she sauntered forward, leaning her weight against the bars of my cell. “You can save your breath, Miss Vanderwaal. My men have records of everyone in this bunker. There’s not a body in here that I don’t know about. Your story was verified by Sergeant Malcolm Albrecht. Regardless…” the word came out as a rather exhausted sigh, as though this whole interaction was beneath her. “You’re here on an unrelated matter entirely.”
“The lockdown…” My chest constricted even more. “I swear, I didn’t do anything. I was just-”
“You are here,” the Commander Sergeant cut me off, her tone equally biting as it was cold, “because of your disobedience. You ignored the orders given under a formal lockdown. Not a drill, Miss Vanderwaal. A drill I could offer some leniency. But in this very specific case, an order was given. And, mind you, in any situation when an order is given, it is expected to be followed. Without compliance there would be chaos. That is something I cannot afford to have in my bunker.”
Her bunker. Commander Sergeant. I felt a heat burning in my cheeks as I stared back at the towering woman. My words from earlier rang in my ears and I sank my teeth into my bottom lip. “So…Lydia…”
“Has been demoted, as far as the bunker is concerned. But it seems I’ve forgotten to introduce myself.” The Commander Sergeant removed herself from the bars, straightening herself a bit. “My name is Meredith Blackthorn; official head of the bunker for all intents and purposes. That also being the voice of law and reason. My job, Miss Vanderwaal, is to maintain order in this bunker for the duration of our time here. And I can’t very well do that if I have chaos unfolding at every given moment. After all, I doubt the population would react too kindly to rumors of a spy in our midst, now would they?”
Her words washed over me like ice water. Any lingering aggravation or fight was drowned in that moment; snuffed out like it had never existed in the first place. Spy. The source. She couldn’t really think I’m the spy, could she? But the Commander Sergeant threw her head back with a laugh.
“Don’t look so worried, my dear. You don’t honestly believe that I would think that someone like you would be capable of being a traitor, do you? You’re hardly smart enough. However,” she cut herself off, leaning back against the bars, “I do believe that it is in your best interest to keep this information to yourself. Wouldn’t you agree?”
My mind was swimming, turning over itself repeatedly. But there was still a spy. She thought so at least. I’d wanted to ask more, but my mouth had all but dried up at her revelation. It didn’t seem to matter anyways. She’d waved me off, making it clear once again that I was hardly more than an inconvenience to her. “Now that the rather…unkindly conversation is over, why don’t we put this behind us, shall we?”
The towering soldier backed away from the bars, pressing a thumb against the keypad on the door. With another grating buzz, the cell door unlatched and slid open. Still, my back remained pressed tightly against the wall, even as she held a hand out. There was still that malicious glint to her eyes; that cold numbness to them. The faux pleasantness on her lips never reached her eyes, and the invitation only seemed to serve as a warning.
Though eventually, I’d complied. Forcing myself away from the wall, I cautiously approached the opened cell. The Commander Sergeant dropped her hand, stepping back out of the way.
“Good.” The word came just as stiff as all her other pleasantries. “Now, why don’t we get you back to your room? Miss St. James must be awfully worried about you.” The moment I stepped out of the cell, she slammed the door shut with another aching clang. “That is whose room you were in after all, correct?”
The glance I’d dared over my shoulder had been enough to make me regret it; that same cold look staring me down. I swallowed, turning my attention back to the door ahead. A rough hand clamped down on my shoulder, urging me forward. Every part of me was missing having those bars in place between us, keeping me somewhere far out of anyone’s reach. Even the thought of my room had offered no solace, and instead, the pit in my stomach only deepened as Meredith pulled open the door to the hallway.
Her line of dutiful soldiers lined the walls, their stances rigid and waiting. Again, Lydia’s attention was on nothing in particular; just a blank stare ahead and a passive face.
“And one final word of advice before I leave you with my men, here.” The Commander Sergeant’s grip only tightened on my shoulder as we stepped through the doorway. “I would think it wise, Miss Vanderwaal, that we don’t meet again under such unseemly circumstances.”
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There was a quiet knock that came from somewhere out beyond the curtain. It was loud enough to rouse me from my sleep, much to my dismay. With a groan, I pushed myself up into a more seated position as the knock sounded again. The faded white numbers on my wall glared back at me through bleary eyes and I blinked through the dark spots. Meredith’s words were still ringing in my ears from earlier that day. Or had it been the previous night? I couldn’t remember. The lines between days and nights had blurred ages ago, and now all that was left was either awake or asleep.
Or somewhere in between.
The knock came again, sharper this time and I tore my gaze from the numbers to my curtain. There was a vague silhouette on the other side that shifted, and I took a steadying breath. Sage would have said something by now and Mira would’ve just let herself in. Those hauntingly cold eyes and stretched smile flashed through my mind, but I forced it down. “....yeah?”
“Rowan?” That same breath snaked out in a sigh past my lips as Lydia spoke up. I slumped forward over my knees as the curtain shifted to the side, revealing the soldier on the other side. Her eyes flitted me over for a moment, and the only emotion on her face was the subtle tugging together of her brows. But just as soon as it was there, it was gone again. “I have orders to escort you to the mess hall.”
“Meredith?” Lydia didn’t answer, and she didn’t have to. Somewhere out of sight, there was an unmistakable snickering and I ran a hand over my face. Of course. I briefly wondered just how long she planned on having me on a leash for, but it didn’t matter. Lydia had been demoted from head of the bunker and now stuck dealing with me.
Unwilling to make the situation any more mind numbing for her, I crawled out from under the thin blanket and got changed into yet another variation of the same clothes I’d been wearing for the past several weeks. Once I was changed and the old clothes were discarded on the foot of my cot, I pushed my way out into the hallway.
Lydia had been waiting against the far wall, arms folded over her chest and phone in hand. Her eyes were narrowed, locked on the screen. The curtain swung shut behind me as I took another cautious step out into the hall. “Lyd-”
“About time,” a voice sneered from only about an inch away.
I jumped, staggering back a few steps as the taller figure pushed herself off the wall. Amber eyes flitted me up and down a moment before she sauntered over to Lydia. There was no hiding the subtle amusement that curled at the corners of her lips, but that obnoxious self satisfaction of hers didn’t exactly aid in slowing my heart back down.
At least now though, the soldier’s attention had lifted from her phone and her stance straightened itself out as Shada rounded to stand beside her. “Enough, Shada,” Lydia hissed at her before looking back to me. Her gaze softened a bit as she sighed, nodding down the corridor in the general direction of the mess hall. “Come on. Commander’s orders.”
Surely she has better things to be doing than making a point, right? I’d wondered to myself for probably the second time that morning, but I followed the woman regardless. If anything, Meredith was making a point, no matter how petty. The threat of a spy crept back into my mind, however, and suddenly her precautions didn’t seem so petty.
“-all the orders I’ve ever had, this takes the cake as the most absurd,” Lydia was commenting from in front. There was no bitterness nor malice to her words. Instead, there was an amused lilt to her tone, which that in itself had been relieving. “Still can’t believe you met Meredith Blackthorn,” she continued, though more likely for her own sake than mine. I wasn’t terribly fond of recounting the events of that night, though the brunette didn’t seem to notice. “She’s got a reputation of her own. A cryptid of the front lines.”
“Then why’s she here?” I pressed, to which the woman fell silent. I was waiting for the answer; backup. A spy. But when she didn’t respond, I ventured to continue against my own better judgment. “Did she think she could do a better job running the bunker than you?”
“Please,” Shada snorted from my right. “Lyd had everything under control. Meredith just thought she could come and save the day. Reliving the good ole days as a war hero or some shit.”
“Shay, please.” Lydia shot a look over her shoulder at the girl as we drew closer to the mess hall. I couldn’t tell if the circles under her eyes were from the harsh lighting, or the situation at hand. Or both. “I know we’ve had our differences, but she’s still my superior.” The soldier’s hand rested against the door as she held it open for the two of us.
I ducked my way in and immediately the scent of food wafted over me. The air was thick as ever, though it seemed it was still early enough that most of the tables remained unoccupied. It was only a small handful of people crowding around the tables closest to the kitchen, and a few stragglers occupying other tables nearby. My gaze flitted up to the TV’s in the corner of the room, where usually the news would be playing. Instead, there was only a black screen displaying the time.
7:34.
There was still another hour and a half until breakfast was over, but the dull ache in my stomach had me wondering when the last time I’d eaten actually was. Had the lockdown happened before or after dinner? I couldn’t remember, and I didn’t care to. With the other two still locked into a hushed argument, I broke away and started towards the kitchen.
“Rowan?” It was Lydia, but her voice had sounded so loud in the otherwise quiet room. Maybe the gentle look on her face should have eased the tension coiling in my body, but it didn’t. “Stay out of trouble, would you?” All I could do at first was offer her a nod, which appeared to be good enough for her. “And I’ll be back for you later.” The soldier gave Shada’s shoulder a squeeze and retreated back towards the hallway.
I watched as the massive doors swung shut in her wake, leaving Shada standing rooted in the spot where she’d just been. It had been well over twelve hours since I’d last eaten, which was the only way to explain the way that the girl’s shoulders almost seemed to sag a little bit. Maybe a trick of the light. Maybe a lack of food. More than enough reasons to push both her, and my interactions with both Meredith and Lydia, to the back of my mind.
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Unfortunately, things seemed to have a habit of going the exact opposite of how I’d imagined them to go. The moment my plastic tray clattered to the metal table, a painfully familiar figure dropped down in the seat beside me. Her back hit the edge of the table, and my sigh seemed to go unnoticed. Or ignored.
“Buzz off,” I muttered, not bothering to look in Shada’s direction. Her careless hum only furthered the aggravation prickling under my skin and I tapped my packet of silverware against the table. “I’m not in the mood, Rhodes.” The fork pushed through the thin plastic with ease.
“What?” The feigned innocence in her voice was just as aggravating as everything else. Her arms were draped casually over the surface of the table, one leg crossed over the other and eyes locked onto me in a way that made my face burn.
Scowling, I turned my attention back to the tray in front of me, pushing around pieces of undercooked egg. “Don’t you have literally anyone else you could be bothering right now?”
“I’m not bothering anyone, pretty girl,” she hummed in response, pleased with her own blatant disregard to my comment. “Just wonderin’ where that pretty little puppet of yours is.” I shot her a look out of the corner of my eyes, grip tightening around the metal of my fork. “If I had to take a guess, it’d be she heard you got hauled off by Meredith. A pretty memorable feat, if ya ask me. But maybe she doesn’t wanna be around that kind of drama.”
“Shut up,” I hissed at her, though that only seemed to further her amusement.
“Speakin’ of which. Whatever happened to that redheaded friend of yours? Finally get tired of all your whining?”
A picture-perfect family flashed through my mind. Red hair and green eyes. A wide smile, piercings on full display. Loud laughter rang in my ears and I ground my teeth together. Traded in, that’s what. “I’m warning you. Knock it off.”
But of course, Shada Rhodes could do no such thing. She shifted in her seat, eyes lazily roaming over her fingers, curled in front of her. She ran a thumb across her scabbing knuckles, her lips twisted back into that typical smirk of hers. “I’m just wondering how long it’s gonna take before that little puppet of yours gets tired of you, too.”
My fork was clattering to my tray before I could stop myself. That low drawl, that carelessness; all of it. Like a match struck one too many times, the aggravation had reached its breaking point and I was whirling around in my seat with my hand flying through the air.
But the contact never happened. Instead, her fingers caught my wrist merely an inch from her face. Amber eyes were level with mine. Now, however, there was a dark glint to them - one that made my breath catch in my throat.
“Easy, pretty girl,” she warned. I’d never felt more like a piece of meat than I did the moment her eyes rolled over me in such a show of…what? Contempt? But yet, that subtle upturn to her lips still remained locked in place. If anything, that smirk only seemed to have grown. “I knew you were feisty, but never imagined you’d be so damn bold.”
Seething, I jerked my arm from her grasp. Shada didn’t put up a fight, but the ache where her fingers had been told me that she wouldn’t have had to. “And I never imagined you’d be so damn ignorant,” I fired back at her, rubbing a thumb over my wrist.
The only response I got from her was an amused huff. Her lips twitched again, eyes never wavering. I’d held her gaze a moment longer before forcing myself to look away. I doubted she did the same. The silence that washed over us was anything but reassuring; I knew it was only a matter of time before she had something else to say, and my cheeks were still burning from before. Though for the time being, luck seemed to be on my side. At the groaning of the massive doors being pushed open, I lifted my head and the weight that had been settling in my chest eased up a bit.
That beautiful face lit up the moment her eyes landed on me, and I pushed my tray to the center of the table. Shada had climbed to her feet along with me, and I shot an aggravated look in her direction. But her gaze wasn’t on me; her eyes were watching lazily as Sage approached.
“Guess she’s not completely fed up yet,” the girl mused, stretching an arm across her chest. “I gotta make myself scarce anyways. Training with Lyd. Y’know. For when the Russians come and all that.”
Russians. Spy. Threat. Source.
My attention snapped back to my left, just in time to catch the tail end of a wink in my direction. She’d stalked off before I had the chance to say anything more. Not that I actually thought she’d give me anything. My feet remained locked in place, and even as I felt warm fingers curling around mine, that didn’t ease the cold crawling through my body. But I turned to Sage regardless, allowing her to pull me into a hug. I felt her face burying itself into my shoulder and her breath against my skin. Her nails dug into the back of my jacket, and my arms had curled around her back until I couldn’t possibly hold her any tighter.
For when the Russians come.
“-happened?” I’d only been somewhat aware of Sage’s voice, barely cutting through the muffled swarm of words in my mind. She’d backed up a step, big brown eyes searching over every inch of my face and I blinked.
Forcing everything to the back of my mind, I offered her arm a reassuring squeeze. I watched those wide eyes soften, her brows knitting together but above all else, I could still see the faintest upturn to her lips. The shadow of relief across her face. The previous day’s conversation still lingered between us, and that hopeful grin was still plastered in the back of my mind. Who was I to take that away? So I swallowed the truth and gave her a smile. “Just routine, Sage,” I told her. “Just a practice run.”
They wanted everyone to comply, I’d told her. Just in case. Wanted it to be known how seriously it should be taken in the future. And she’d accepted it without another word. Without question. And when we ate, we ate in what I could only describe as silence. She spoke, though nothing she said could break through the ringing in my ears. I’d caught words here and there about recipes and sunlight. Home and Brooklyn. The park, the birds and the sky.
But the only word in my mind was spy.
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