I never believed in the afterlife. All my life I’ve heard various iterations of it, but for some reason I never bought into it. Maybe it was the various TV shows trying to scare the hell out of you with dramatic reenactments and the spooky music, and so I became convinced the idea of life after death had some sort of hidden agenda. I’ve never seen proof of it myself, and everyone I knew that believed it was naive. So again I’m going to say I never believed in the afterlife, until one fateful day...584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dgVDc2nC9
It was near the end of my second year of college, and already the social life was catching up to me. My friend I’d made the year before had invited me to various parties, and I started going boy crazy. My mom of course didn’t know about it. At least not outright. Her mom radar was telling her I was up to something, because she was my grades and how they were slipping from A’s and B’s to C’s and D’s. Shockingly, she never said anything and it almost made me feel worse. I messed up. I knew it, my mom knew it, but the silence of it all was killing me. I was failing my mom, but I didn't know how to talk to her. It was at this point that things began to get weird.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkibCqCzlTA
You see, things that happened throughout my childhood started happening again. Ever since I could remember, our house seemed to be haunted. It was never anything too strange, but something invisible would touch me. It was such a simple gesture, but it always scared the life out of me. And now it was happening at college.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7yU5ng5zfX
Sometimes it was a touch on the shoulder, and I would turn and expect mom to be standing there, but she was in another room or just not at home altogether. The oddest thing that happened was when I felt felt three taps on my back. I never told my mom about it, because who would believe it? I occasionally asked if she was in my room or other things to rationally explain it, but nothing ever quite fit.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOy6S264EhA
But now, for the first time in my life this was happening outside of my house. Usually this was after a hard night of partying and being stupid. I’d come back to my dorm and I would feel the invisible hand on me. I dismissed it as being too drunk, but it happened way too often and at times when I didn’t drink anything. It bothered me to the point that I had to talk to my mom. It was driving me absolutely crazy, and I felt it was time to talk about other things too.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTnK7Tlf59I
“Hey, can I talk to you about something?” I prompted her one night.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rNeL8zwrH
“Of course, sweetie. What is it?” Mom said, her eyes intently focused on me now. She had probably been waiting all year for me to say something like this. We were closer when I was younger, but like a typical teenager I distanced myself from her in favor of my friends.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQM4cFyAHO
“Um...I’m not sure how to start so I’ll blurt it out. I’ve been partying, alot.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡme95UySzwC
“Like out drinking with your friends partying?”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVoSCWuUISv
“Yeah...”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMF87l3e9Vt
“I thought as much.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRSNZRVu4ju
"Yeah. And I just....I dunno I felt like maybe instead of hiding it I might as well talk about it. You’re my mom, after all.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCLgPvigUoI
“Well, that’s great! It’s all I’ve ever wanted. I’ve known this year has been very different for you. Your attitude has changed, and your grades are slipping. But I try not to pry, and I also want you to learn how to mess up on your own and pay the consequences on your own if you do. You do remember our agreement, right?"584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu1rf5IQbJi
“Of course. If I flunk out, no more help.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPNyKv7WOxr
“That’s right. You’re on the verge here. And while I’m glad you’ve got this far, I don’t want you to throw it all away. You are so smart and you have so much potential.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1zhC1komiG
“I know, mom. I’ve kinda been a jerk, to be honest. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in my life outside of here. Country girl going to the big city and having a good time. It’s cliche, but I think I’ve gotten a good idea what the party life is about. And it’s just starting to wear me thin, I think.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDaVJAxSGR
“Is a boy involved in any of this?”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ6S0PVpg5T
“Well, I mean...kind of. I’ve dated guys this year, but it’s sort of wishy-washy. I’ve heard the psychological thing about finding guys to fill a void in their life. And it’s even more true for girls who didn’t have a father around so I dunno...I’m just feeling so guilty all of the sudden and the guy thing made me think of dad and....”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu7qAEUtBxd
"Oh, honey it’s alright.” She hugged me tight for a moment, and I continued.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2CVrj25L7I
"So, anyway. With all that going on, something else started happening. And, I... and...”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPajN5i1Pd3
I paused, debating over whether or not I would talk about the ghost hand that had scared me for all those years.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp3kvdNXbXD
"What? What is it, hun?” An intense look of concern lined her brow.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGPK8kOKs7z
"So, the other reason I wanted to talk is...kinda weird. Um...there’s this weird thing that’s been happening. Ever since I was young. I think I was five, or four at the earliest.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKG5NvfqTMy
“Okay...?”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEwxS4TA6gy
“So, this is going to sound SO crazy, but...I sometimes get touched by something. Something I can’t see.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6mKfhBCiP9
The expression on mom’s face went very grim, and right away I knew she was going to throw me into the loony bin.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvfrIx6Xdu
“I know how it sounds, mom. Please don’t think I’m...”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGUgNDDM5i
"Crazy? No, I don’t think you’re crazy. I just...I wondered why you never told me.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKrboDtdX4k
“For that very reason! Overactive imagination or something. But it can’t be, because I felt it all the time when I was younger. I think I ignored it so much at one point that it stopped. It was only at the house, and it freaked me out so much. And now....now it’s starting again.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlp21XQPdB1
“Oh, my. So it’s all connected somehow.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYEHb2sbdZ
“Yeah, exactly! I just...really felt like we should talk. We should be able to talk about anything, but this is soooo weird.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqbn1CHcVDl
“That is strange. So when you say touch, what do you mean?”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxaWVjnp7ON
“Well, basically it felt like someone putting a hand on my shoulder, or tapping me on the back."584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmedcscMHS1
“Is that why you would ask me if I was in your room?”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4ubj1hskD
“Yeah.”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtTAMUuXogl
"That would explain some things...”584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRcndpU710p
“So is our house haunted? Can something from a haunted house even follow you? I just don’t know, this is all so strange."584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfGhsYcWcoP
“So something is definitely happening here. You said it's been at college, too?584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvc5MrOpbrN
"Yeah, that's the weird part. Lately, it's been more frequent. In fact, the more I partied and went out with friends being stupid, the more it seemed to happen. I'd get back to my dorm, and it would start up there again. Especially when it would tap three times on my back. That was the weirdest. It would be exactly three times every time."584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOWJ7xAGNHH
At this, my mother's eyes lit up in realization and her face went white for a second.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdguwaLmru3
"You said three times on your back?" Her word shook with every syllable.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr46Ot6dQIB
"Yeah, why? What's wrong?"584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ17oRXVLZKT
"Sherry, are you sure?"584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8EZBPwMf0
"Yeah, it was three times. Mom, are you okay?"584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzI4H48o5F1
Suddenly, tears began streaming out of her eyes. I put my arm around her and scooted in closer.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcaZq4eFAtn
"Mom, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy1TG2ugFGC
She continued for a moment longer, and I brought some tissues while she regained her composure. Finally, she settled down long enough to speak again.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHrX76BnGmF
"I'm sorry, honey. I'm crying because...it's.....it's a happy thing. Well sad, maybe a little bit of everything. I don't know what to call it." As she talked, she struggled to maintain her composure. Whatever this thing was, it was big.584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObl4aMnvYn
"What is it, then?"584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDdOabXITVv
"Sherry, what you just told me about the three taps...is a big confirmation of what this means."584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1jGeqeikK
"A confirmation of what?"584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6yuJoRJFT
"You remember that your father was deaf, don't you? I know you don't remember him when he was alive, but it's important."584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQf1RvqKwlA
"Yeah, I do remember you telling me that. Mom, what are you saying? I'm so confused here."584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZoIgD2YgLx
"Your father...he'd been deaf since birth. Since he never heard anyone speak he couldn't say anything that you could understand. As much as he wanted to say the words 'i love you,' he could never get the words out. It broke my heart when he tried, but couldn't. He could sign it, but he wanted something that was quicker and more personal. So we made this little system, just for us. If he wanted to say 'I love you,' he would tap me on the back three times. 584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJwJhZQhQ3
He even did this to you when you were a baby. After you'd be down for a nap in your crib, he'd watch you for a minute and tap you on the back three times before he left the room. Sherry, this experience you thought was a 'haunting'....it's been your father this whole time. I distinctly remember him saying that he would always be proud of you. Even if you messed up, he would love you just the same. He's still around, and he's trying to let you know that he's still proud of you despite all that's happened this year."584Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDPn8Vr455A
Now, it was me that was balling and it got her balling and we held each other until no tears were left. Ever since then, I became very close friends with my mom and I told her everything. It was all thanks to my dad gently guiding me to her with his personal, subtle sign of love. It was that day that I spoke with my mom that I knew there was something far beyond our lives here on Earth. From beyond the grave, my father was still connected to me and I welcomed every tap from that day on.
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