Eli throws himself back in his chair, one hand to his head and the other limp across the chair’s arm. The box falls out of his grip and clatters on the wooden floor. His grandmother’s ring pops out of the box and skitters away from him. The diamonds taunt him in the moonlight.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzNMVPIE9ru
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“We can’t do this,” Mari said gently, curling his hand over the ring.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDaLTHMfP3c
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The memory makes him shudder. Good thing he did it alone rather than in a crowded location as he was originally planning to.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0DjEhl6sQ
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“I love you,” he said.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjC6eRg3uL
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“I love you too.” She stared at the flame of the candle between them. “But…how can we get married when you aren’t old enough to drink at your own bachelor party? Are we supposed to pop open a bottle of apple cider?”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpBADfgyOv3
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5c2XNF305M
“I didn’t know drinking was that important to you,” he said stiffly, running his pinky along the rim of his water glass.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFGU5kVspkL
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgblB46MHmq
“It isn’t that,” Mari said. “It’s what being able to drink represents.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnSvW09FLqT
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5e3haJL9BV
“And what’s that?” he asked, knowing he wasn’t helping his case by sounding like a petulant child.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF6zY1lFecl
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJDv8EiIKI
“That you’re an adult,” she said, reaching across the table to put a hand to his cheek. “Which you aren’t yet.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9TA2BswTp
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIY12VaR0uH
“That’s not what you said last night,” Eli muttered.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7MiboFtTgW
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She shot him a look and her smile melted away. “I love you, Eli. You know that. But we can’t get married. At the very least, we can’t get married right now.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFzVUcFA10F
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡckhXNFdMes
The table is still set for dinner, even though Mari has long since left. The ice in her water glass has melted. He can still smell the candle wax.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqAaaG80thH
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtnh9AHNdeU
Mari wanted to go to the Epik High concert even more than Eli did. Or rather, Eli wanted to go but had to accept the fact that he couldn’t afford to do everything while studying full-time and working part-time at the university bookstore. But Mari wanted to do everything.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTtssdJvbMI
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ4lfXuVgJz
“I can’t go to the concert,” he told her.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6D5AkQp78P
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6uKtX5TL1o
She bought him a ticket anyway, telling him, “It isn’t a big deal.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRKvAFSJNs
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWZjXipJlHs
It’s always been like that. She casually buys him a ticket to something and doesn’t think twice about it. For him, however, each event she pays for becomes a brick on his back. He can’t imagine she’s as fine with it as she seems to be.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0IxjSdbQh
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAu9sHbwWxp
He has never been sure what bothers him more—being a burden on her or the fact that she isn’t honest about how she feels, that she pretends it’s okay that she has to keep paying for him.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepcn0uijeD
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwPQvdyrYKH
Eli gets up, leaving the ring where it is on the floor and goes out to the balcony. He leans his forearms on the cold metal railing and leans forward, staring up at the sky. His favorite thing about living in a college town is that he can actually see the stars—especially since his apartment is at the top of the hill.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm5iHvJnOXh
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbASMVJqcj
He drops his gaze down toward the school and can even see Bell Hall, the building with the lab where Mari works. There are some lights on, although he’s fairly certain Mari isn’t there right now. She’s probably soaking in a hot bath—probably reading to calm her nerves after rejecting Eli’s proposal.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUym1MUip7
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQglD8w7jx
He grips the railing and leans back, eyes turned upward again. The night breeze pushes his hair off his forehead.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkS2bxjsAge
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVccdSGv7iH
He went to the lab with her once, but only once. Mari had needed to stop by and start an experiment before they headed out on a date. He had trailed in after her, wanting to see what she did and just wanting to be in her presence.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jYbVwbVqg
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvKe7otUSIN
One of her coworkers stopped by to talk to her and glanced at Eli questioningly.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYt5KdFV8vv
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡka883c5t7W
“Alan, this is my boyfriend, Eli,” Mari said.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPWDI56JbYb
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2k9nHk45U
“So, Eli, what do you do?” Alan said as they shook hands.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRR2fGXctFE
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt9hXN2LZqO
“Are you really going to pester my boyfriend right now?” Mari said, taking Eli’s arm and tried to pull him away.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡplr6rwWnDl
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk6RrBg6osJ
“Pester him? I’m just trying to be polite,” Alan said. “Is his job top secret or something?”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVtGg5i6k9C
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6c3dkccvMg
Mari’s lips were pressed together. Clearly she had never told her coworkers she’d met her boyfriend while she was a graduate student T.A. for his undergrad biochem class.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXlAfySFNLI
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSCNZE6wYAV
“I’m a student,” Eli said, suddenly wanting to leave the lab and head out to their movie.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5GMVEw4ymY
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9jFNrljy87
“PhD? What do you study?” Alan said.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiNJ3wOi3bg
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjPSS08zAI8
“No, not a PhD student,” Eli said, his neck and cheeks starting to heat up. He couldn’t meet Mari’s gaze.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrsDTTx1xgd
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWWxnlsH0EK
“Oh, Master’s then?” 725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFi53HzAQMj
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡphwFRKKXRS
“Actually, I’m an undergrad,” Eli said.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5s7xilRuM9
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ljS2ylB50
“Oh.” Alan looked at Mari and then back at Eli. “Well, it was good to meet you, man.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmDgCrFhQr
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtra4FT83k5
Eli followed Mari in silence. He could feel something like embarrassment or shame rising off of her, but she turned around and placed a hand on his forearm, forcing a gentle smile.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyBdl13G76W
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf7W4a4vK9h
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “This is just because of your age. One day, you’ll catch up to me—maybe even pass me—and it won’t matter. We’ll forget there was ever a time like this.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3GOV13h6p6
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9muOI4ZXYL
Eli sighs. Crickets chirp in time with the twinkling of the stars. As he stares up absently, a giant meteor falls. He watches it streak across the sky, getting brighter and brighter and brighter until the blazing light fills the sky, fills his vision, fills his mind.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYmdAM7PFHy
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrl6bjT0BIP
He blinks. He’s in the living room of an apartment. There are no lights on, and the time reads 2:57 a.m. on a digital clock with green numbers—just around the time he was standing outside. 725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS7CVqbtKiI
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrg806oV6l
He realizes with surprise that there’s something in his hand. It’s a piece of a rock. He would think it’s a dream, but the rock smells like metal and fire. It’s warm. Eli brings it to his face. 725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk8sBzLGUZD
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlg5teeo9KP
He doesn’t see how it’s possible, but he wonders if it’s a part of a meteor—maybe the meteor he just saw.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4xRaHaLEM
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsgGprgqvg3
He surveys the apartment. It’s bland and undecorated, but the wooden dining table seems ready to splinter under the weight of open textbooks and notebooks. A closed MacBook charges, precariously close to a half-finished mug of coffee. Eli leans forward and looks at the notebook, immediately recognizing the handwriting.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtB9ZopzL2
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2NE14ZD0Z
It isn’t possible.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHugP1caz5t
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2y2rbt8VR2
He glances toward a closed door that he assumes is a bedroom and makes his way over warily, quietly pushing it open. There’s a bed on the other side, up against the wall. Moonlight streams directly upon the sleeping form. Her back is turned, and even if it weren’t for the dark hair ribboning across the pillow, he still would have recognized her.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2x8bBJIwYc
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv85ZNuLYL2
He creeps closer—she’s a notoriously light sleeper—and takes a better look. She shifts in her sleep slightly, as though she can sense she has a visitor. And then he sees her face. Mari looks pretty much the same as she did when he saw her a few hours ago, only more vulnerable. There are streaks of lavender in her hair, starting at her scalp and traveling out. Her bangs are shorter, settling on her closed eyelids. There’s still a hint of baby softness that hasn’t yet melted away to reveal the sultry cheekbones in the Mari he loves.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5rrpmIF61D
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4LQCG2wEp
Eli presses a button on her phone, illuminating the screen, to see the date. Five years ago to the day.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCpBLXZbVFF
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaSjm5i1XBj
If this is right, if this isn’t a dream of some sort, he’s seeing her when she was the same age as he is now. He looks at the meteor, still in his hand. He isn’t sure how he knows this, but he’s suddenly sure the meteor was his ticket here and will be his ticket back to his year.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheGlkCpsoX
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq5LNnQQnxt
But he has an idea. Now that he’s here, why not stay? He’ll age with her, and she will no longer be five years older than him. He’ll make it work, somehow—find a way to survive as a twenty-year-old in this year, stage a run-in with her. She’ll fall in love with him again, but they’ll be on equal ground.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMJNQ4tWNR
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNk75g34Lqp
Sliding the little meteor piece into his pocket, he takes a deep breath, excitement mounting at the thought of starting again with her at the same age—even if she is still a month older. They’ll have five more years together than they would have otherwise.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN849u00Qjo
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡho1kA65GJL
“Is this really want you want?” Mari asked him multiple times, a shrewd look on her face. “With me five years older than you, you do realize things might need to happen five years faster than you want them to, right?”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJiF76BNV4
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“Like what?” he said.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuEMeBxDJQ0
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“Getting married, having kids,” she said.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTAr3yRFUEA
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjjeF2AbNj
“Well, good thing you warned me about it now,” Eli said. “Now I’m mentally prepared.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS0uY4tInV9
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4bxp1N9aN
“Seriously, though,” she said. “Don’t you want someone your age?”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOrCDB0LsS
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMFDrhd8E8
Eli sits cross-legged on the floor beside her bed, deflating instantly. If he stays here isn’t he finding someone his own age. He told her he didn’t care about their age difference. And he doesn’t, really. He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, feeling a little dizzy as if he just got off a rollercoaster.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHkq8Wqfbr7
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxcgTLD79a
“I can’t believe you’ve never ridden a rollercoaster before,” Eli said.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1JCd1H036S
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXFNYcWO0pD
Mari gripped his hand, her nails digging into his skin. Her eyes were wide, focused on the car that sped by thunderously. The riders’ screams seemed to hover in the air behind them.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFDDn9RZhRI
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf42EnIGBAr
“Well,” she said. “I guess this is all part of our goal of making new memories together.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeD7kYYqN9y
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQIeV8jSDEa
This Mari sleeping in front of him doesn’t have that memory of riding the rollercoaster with him. She doesn’t have any of the memories they’ve created over the past two years. The situation would be unbalanced with him knowing her soul even as she tries to discover his.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkEJAxWSrIU
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs19pVCagqE
Eli takes the meteor out of his pocket. It seems like it’s getting warmer. He stands up and looks at her again, a little sad at the thought of a future that can never be. Taking his chance, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead, just above her left eyebrow. Even five years ago, she used the smell shampoo she uses in the present.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccxCW9w0U8
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3EzQ7AvJi
Mari stretches and blinks blearily at him. He knows she was almost blind pre-LASIK. This Mari can barely see anything without her glasses or contacts. He must be just a blonde-haired outline to her, too indistinct for her to even tell he’s Korean under that blonde hair.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0RXIEV3oP5
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“Who are you?” she murmurs.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqwPeQMUGPX
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3uV8NstAsq
He thinks about it for a moment and speaks softly to keep from waking her up completely. “I’m someone you haven’t met yet—someone you’ll meet in the future and fall in love with, but not quite as deeply as I’ll fall in love with you.”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡduRUyF9kJt
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1QNsVoYxy
“Why?” Her voice is still groggy, eyes half-closed.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc3B8OR0BLZ
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36VXcRsZ4q
“Because I’m younger than you,” Eli says, gently putting a finger to her cheek. “It’ll bother you, and I think you won’t believe me when I say just how much I love you. But I love you, and only you, and especially you when you’re five years older than me. Don’t forget it, okay?”725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGESfRuheKL
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7hLDnHPfQ
He holds his pinky out to her. She curves her own pinky around his. Her skin is almost as warm as the meteor.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSzVUI2YAMl
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2ndTR3XyN
“Okay.” Her voice is nearly gone now as she sinks back into sleep.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxwTuglskYt
725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH1fPEmEUdd
He holds the meteor in his palm as it burns more fiercely, watching this Mari and thinking about the Mari waiting for him back in his present.725Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMZC0XglTq1
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