CHAPTER 9
Jimmy stabbed a spade shovel into the ground with his foot, and stood with one leg on foot on the grass and the other on the guard of the shovel. He had both hands on the handle as he rest his chin on top of his white knuckles as he stared at the six foot long, four foot wide, and three foot deep rectangular grave he had dug for his recently deceased beloved, Ariel.
This was gonna be Ariel's final resting place, it was situated under the hanging tendrils of a weeping willow tree. James stood next to Jimmy, still choking on his tears. James was probably the one most impacted by Ariel's death, she and him had been friends since they were little children and were as close as friends could possibly be. They even got married in a mock ceremony at the age of five, which was a teensy bit weird considering that many people around them mistook them for brother and sister after witnessing how tight knit they were; inseparable like a pair of mittens that were attached to each other.
"You should've pulled the damn trigger sooner." said James quietly, he shared Jimmy's stare at the open grave. A gust of wind accompanied him as the noon sunlight revealed him as he briefly looked up at Jimmy as if he were a murderer. That brief gaze was the real murderer, it killed Jimmy just a little bit on the inside.
Jimmy stood silent and feeling an intense feeling of guilt. He just simply didn't know what to say, and rightfully so.
"Should've never ran off by yourself, so she would've never had to come running after your sorry butt. Like Alice chasing after a good haired hare only to fall into a hole." he said a little louder and more aggression was in his tone this time, he leaned in almost touching his nose with his and looked Jimmy dead in the eyes that were glassy and welled up with tears and anger and said what hurt the most, "The zombie should've gotten you instead."
James stood impatiently, awaiting a response from Jimmy that would never come. Jimmy just couldn't choke up anything to say for the life of him, so he continued to quietly stare at the grave and felt his accusatory stare burn into the side of his head. After a couple anguishing moments of silence, James scoffed as he stuck a cigarette in his mouth and struck a flame, putting it up to the butt of the cigarette. He tapped the embers of the burning cigarette onto the ground before taking it out of his mouth and releasing a puff of smoke. After that, James began to storm off but stopped behind Jimmy who felt something hit his back. James had flicked the cigarette at Jimmy's back. "Don't need these damned death sticks, anyway." James said before storming off into the house, leaving Jimmy alone at the grave.
After James left, a single tear rolled down Jimmy's cheek and fell into the grave. Jimmy shared a somber moment with the grave as the wind pulled the replacement white V-neck tee shirt to his chest underneath his leather jacket.
Maybe James was right, this was his fault and he could've stopped it from happening. If only he had been faster.
Jimmy's train of thought was abruptly derailed by the slam of the back door as Darya, Eddie, Matt, and Sara walked out with Ariel's peaceful body on their shoulders and stopped in front of the grave.
They were about to lower he into the grave when Jimmy interrupted them, "Wait." his voice was soft, softer than anyone there had ever heard it. He retrieved a sharpie from a pocket on his jacket and asked them to lay Ariel down on the grass, to that they complied.
Jimmy knelt down beside Ariel's lifeless body. She looked so peaceful and at rest, Jimmy was almost envious of her peaceful state. Her eyes were closed, her mouth was closed, and her chocolate brown hair was fanned out on the green grass.
He uncapped the sharpie and began to write on the makeshift bandage that was Jimmy's old tee shirt. He wrote in black ink, "I love you, and I'm so sorry." he drew cute little hearts of black surrounding the message, classic Jimmy flair.
"Ok. I'm done. Take her, please." the rest obeyed the command seeing the sorrow in Jimmy's eyes and hearing his muffled sobs under his hands that were cupped around his face like a mask. it truly made Jimmy look like another more vulnerable person, crying like that; maybe the alpha male could break too.
The group lowered Ariel into the earthly grave. Ariel was dressed in the same blood splattered white tank top and khakis that she had died in. The blood on it not only belongs to her but was also her murderer’s. The murderer's blood appeared on her white tank top like ink blots on a perfectly white piece of paper. Her signature wire rimmed aviator's glasses with beer colored lenses that shined in the afternoon sunshine, to Jimmy it looked like the warm and golden color of autumn.
The blood of the creature was thick and was exceedingly viscous and mucoid like molten lava running down the slopes of a volcano.
After a moment of complete silence after Ariel's body was peacefully laid to rest in her tomb of dirt under the soothing shadow of a weeping willow tree, Darya cleared her throat. "Perhaps it is time to say thoughtful words about Ariel, out deeply departed."
Darya stepped in front of the group on the edge of the grave and turned to face the group. " I go first." said Darya softly in her broken English and heavy Russian accent, that was strong and beautiful at the same time. Darya looked down on the grave lovingly and said, "She was very pretty girl, I envy her. She was very strong woman, so brave to run after you Jimmy. You were very lucky man, Jimmy. I'm so sorry." she said with a nod towards Jimmy who politely nodded back. Suddenly a flashback hit jimmy like a drunk semi-truck driver. He suddenly could recall him pulling the trigger, that fatal chomp to Ariel's neck, and most traumatic of all; in black and white, he could perfectly remember the moment of grief he had when he noticed that Ariel had stopped breathing.
Darya continued to talk, it was astonishing how she spoke volumes about Ariel, when she had only known her for a day; yet she felt so much about her, and seemed to legitimately care for her deeply. But one thing she said spoke volumes of what Jimmy and everyone else thought when she died, she said, “She was just like Siberian tiger cub shot too soon. Too soon did she meet the inevitable and deadly fate." She was right, so much wasted potential in a life cut short at the age of 26.
The rest of the afternoon flew by very fast, like a time lapse of the busy streets of New York. Eddie was next; he said something about Ariel being Jimmy's best girl and his envy for him. Nothing remarkable, the only thing that was truly remarkable about Eddie was his loyalty and friendship, and his cleverness and sarcastic wit.
Next spoke Sara, her kind, gentle works read along the lines of how loyal of a friend she was in life, and how she was left many great memories behind to reminisce on.
After that, Matt took front and center. He remarked on how Ariel was a real peacemaker, reminiscing on how she managed to be the psychiatrist and problem solver of the squad and somehow also being the drama queen at the same time.
Soon enough, Jimmy found himself out there all alone underneath the dangling branches of the weeping willow tree and the cloudy night sky as the season's first snowfall fell gently and softly as it drifted with the wind and onto the ground. Jimmy stood with the shovel dug into the soft soil, one foot on the ground and the other on the guard of the shovel. His hands were handle of the shovel, and his chin resting on his cold and dry knuckles.
He stood there, staring forlornly at the fresh patch of dirt, rich and packed full of minerals that were ready to support new life. Sort of like a twisted metaphor of sorts, in the presence of a lack of life; there will always be the potential for new life to take its place. Now those were the words of wisdom that stuck with Jimmy for a long while. After every tragedy there was a miracle somewhere, after every hellish hurricane there was a raging rainbow full of color to bring to the world, and after every blackout there was an amazing culmination of illuminating lights on a city grid that were even visible to the lenses of an orbiting satellite.
Life was beautiful, even when it got ugly. Even if it got very ugly very often, there was always good in there somewhere.
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