同學們面面相覷。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjuSniFPZQe
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「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwimbmLAvr
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDLLhu1Uwjr

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuWKfSMOTvX
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlIZ9tXQch3

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6jUCEVBQTR
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgxlDAWuhf2

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWLzc5iRWcR
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdz6Sl5VJmj

「那改成老不羞好了。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDE1PBfxsqA
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwdl76nmEo7

「更糟糕了啊！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiFwSrQKc6a
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvF5xf4iBo

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5C548w2TsW
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL2u2Kb8vzi

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFVIDOAxGzU
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu3Y1IcLJP7

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt49m87yGvq
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ85kAHd7VqC

「老師，它正在暖身。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTB3qYeKCEJ
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodMGBFNHzG

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQWuJdc6V5g
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMEr6N4Lr3C

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtRTd1lv2g2
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdpwZpsrNI0

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqSOXMpUyli
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKM2x36Hcwu

「那我改姓三岐。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSjXNlfqv1Z
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2RqJd15LkD

「才不是這個意思！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC8w5Hig0ws
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoH80YaidmB

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmnMuHyYCp6
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡllXqAKpg74

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtMelUTJ0xH
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5q4q44Kh3N

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiNyboiERWX
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHay8qK4Q09

「元帥好弱。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDOlM2jOSMK
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdmk6KhQXDA

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLEd4pLd2mu
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKpU4jG6oB

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNZAfGET31O
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC8svFktEof

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgBLayDSR45
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJYXnTbuGy

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0LxpMEvvAG
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj7KKBC9zLE
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5LSsk8tYC

「老師！別中計啊！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT498WrOMe2
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQJ4vTT9Pmg

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5vENzJaEvL
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZk5WpV2uF1

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFnuL5DTtz3
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMqax70P04

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsF5fsLPRER
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfQ4XKDwNnH

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB2sgfsUPWf
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiIgjveSYQ0

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBUavCoTXqn
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMDurAL2B0

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTxhjp6Znlt
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW7kpP125os

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGkmv71OKZ8
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSFr1hPo410

「什──」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkl8GM8Qv0U
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIC2MmoZzS7

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZagHwuJjYF
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZHLYNUwAA

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIJI79spqu
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5RFk8a5lZW

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6u4nvvBucs
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9uzA4Nru8J

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqWMGdEyYJr
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    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkeAjFTs6Fu
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCkh6yvUAUL

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlxVyDfeT3
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡluqamwbiVK

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsoZ0QYmX6D
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSgCZFRW2yd

    賴妍歪頭。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKpiU7kQR0a
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9InaoTkBZ1

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Ns6iO4BYF
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwJYn1EeVRH

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDyQIEDjdw
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUKUPALDZn

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3g7ksc0pB
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTNNHeF2BT

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfLhPgJdsJ
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡelzS9njx8C

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfYTrYSKOhv
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblrhDdbHsK

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BxwBMMb14
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvtIrgFbClg

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡytbPbbQkEH
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhWwWgnAFbP

「一加一等於二。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmHUILMW3TJ
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMq16EfvRl

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4yYWKvUIkd
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYEZujcyC4w

「……咦？」老師愣住了。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5QlqTMY47
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhN6TxW0ucR

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRErbA0mAJ
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvW5qKDXzy3

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmqNyn5VGUs
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxz3KOshjK

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRDx3Q24r0w
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8lrK6Ah7g

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2C4hGCXmLu
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFmQXevljOF

    完蛋了。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGXFRnmTITR
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFPwHii8Myk

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVSrV4qOYai
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbZXXRCGem

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRE46uiipr
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLX72WIdZI

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHv4rwALS4a
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnSWsfzd7nl

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRlsD72tCn
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMzHpfA9jcx

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDJjXzqfVXZ
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZj0xMTSAfM

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXLq476C7iZ
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbAL4tNc9x8

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGUDwdh4qXB
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGcWw6SOEQ

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwyg4hO8Pg
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcE7fnnP7VB

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvDYedQIZgK
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTkz7ZVoj9A

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsDukvwfg0v
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKZrhfFivTC

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbYeASGp0A
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSvepf45eeZ

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUCGJoWnFbV

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuin7w14FwP
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAGwLHReFFV

「同學！一加一等於多少！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmZ4AOpC4j
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3E4MsDMeBV

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8dvqHM61MR
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhhcZJJlfGI

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm2HtRj70Z1
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxqPcNAGxVb

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ICWjIaDPz
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqWoPlC3uH

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFo0l2RkrQ
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8gBiXRTuP

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOjFx4ZHuSb
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXuLHraOmoZ

    全班盯著三岐。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVUb3NjVmA
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「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHlteGce24X
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp1xFOlgtym

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwBLaRWRB1G
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEoZMHApsK6

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaFDKpNRTHP
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9aNdi0wfNh

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwIq3Cp8JCl
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當日結果：217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡivnGar4x3y
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrm0VK7v8Mq

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBjTlzCeoNZ
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWp0f9Uk1Sm

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhEHuZcldzA
217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Zmda9hhb6

    柳困依然單身。217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyoyCTW2FdX